TED@State Street Boston
Joe Kowan: How I beat stage fright
Joe Kowan: Com vaig superar la por escènica
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El tant afinat sentit de la por de la humanitat ens va fer molt de servei quan érem una espècie jove, evitant que se'ns mengessin les bèsties salvatges. Però no és tant meravellós quan aquest sentit de la por visceral i que et segresta el cos es posa en acció davant de vint aficionats de la música folk en una sessió de micròfon obert un dimarts a la nit. Les mans comencen a suar i a tremolar, la vista es torna borrosa, i el cervell diu CORRE: és la por escènica. En aquesta breu xerrada captivadora i melòdica, Joe Kowan ens parla de com la va vèncer.
Joe Kowan - Musician and graphic designer
By day he's a graphic designer, and by night Joe Kowan is a quirky folk singer-songwriter. Full bio
By day he's a graphic designer, and by night Joe Kowan is a quirky folk singer-songwriter. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:12
Joe Kowan: I have stage fright.
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Joe Kowan: Tinc por escènica.
00:14
I've always had stage fright,
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Sempre he tingut por escènica,
00:15
and not just a little bit,
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i no només una mica,
00:17
it's a big bit.
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un munt.
00:19
And it didn't even matter until I was 27.
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I ni tan sols m'importava fins que vaig tenir 27 anys.
00:21
That's when I started writing songs, and even then
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Que és quan vaig començar a escriure cançons, i fins i tot llavors
00:24
I only played them for myself.
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només tocava per mi mateix.
00:26
Just knowing my roommates were in the
same house made me uncomfortable.
same house made me uncomfortable.
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Només de saber que els meus companys de pis eren a casa em feia sentir incòmode.
00:30
But after a couple of years,
just writing songs wasn't enough.
just writing songs wasn't enough.
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Però al cap d'uns anys, no en tenia prou,
només escrivint cançons.
només escrivint cançons.
00:32
I had all these stories and ideas,
and I wanted to share them with people,
and I wanted to share them with people,
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Tenia un munt d'històries i idees
que volia compartir amb la gent,
que volia compartir amb la gent,
00:35
but physiologically, I couldn't do it.
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però fisiològicament, no ho podia fer.
00:39
I had this irrational fear.
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Tenia una por irracional.
00:42
But the more I wrote, and the more I practiced,
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Però com més escrivia i com més practicava,
00:44
the more I wanted to perform.
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més volia sortir a actuar.
00:45
So on the week of my 30th birthday,
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Així que la setmana en que feia 30 anys,
00:47
I decided I was going to go to this local open mic,
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vaig decidir que aniria a una sessió de micròfon obert propera,
00:50
and put this fear behind me.
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i deixaria enrera aquesta por.
00:52
Well, when I got there, it was packed.
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Doncs bé, quan vaig arribar-hi estava ple.
00:55
There were like 20 people there.
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Hi havia unes 20 persones.
00:57
(Laughter)
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(Riures)
00:58
And they all looked angry.
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I tots semblaven enfadats.
01:01
But I took a deep breath, and I signed up to play,
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Però vaig respirar profundament i em vaig apuntar per tocar,
01:05
and I felt pretty good.
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i em vaig sentir prou bé.
01:06
Pretty good, until about 10 minutes before my turn,
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Prou bé, fins que faltaven 10 minuts pel meu torn,
01:09
when my whole body rebelled, and
this wave of anxiety just washed over me.
this wave of anxiety just washed over me.
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i el meu cos sencer es va rebel·lar
i l'ansietat em va envaïr.
i l'ansietat em va envaïr.
01:15
Now, when you experience fear,
your sympathetic nervous system kicks in.
your sympathetic nervous system kicks in.
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Quan sents por,
el sistema nerviós simpàtic s'engega.
el sistema nerviós simpàtic s'engega.
01:18
So you have a rush of adrenaline,
your heart rate increases,
your heart rate increases,
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Així que tens una descàrrega d'adrenalina,
la teva freqüència cardíaca augmenta,
la teva freqüència cardíaca augmenta,
01:21
your breathing gets faster.
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respires més ràpid.
01:23
Next your non-essential systems start
to shut down, like digestion. (Laughter)
to shut down, like digestion. (Laughter)
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Tot seguit, tot allò no essencial s'atura,
com la digestió. (Riures)
com la digestió. (Riures)
01:29
So your mouth gets dry, and blood is routed
away from your extremities,
away from your extremities,
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La boca se t'asseca,
i la sang se'n va de les extremitats,
i la sang se'n va de les extremitats,
01:32
so your fingers don't work anymore.
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així que els teus dits ja no funcionen.
01:35
Your pupils dilate, your muscles contract,
your Spidey sense tingles,
your Spidey sense tingles,
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Se't dilaten les pupiles, els músculs es contrauen,
et recorre un calfred,
et recorre un calfred,
01:38
basically your whole body is trigger-happy.
(Laughter)
(Laughter)
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bàsicament el teu cos sencer està a punt d'explotar. (Riures)
01:43
That condition is not conducive
to performing folk music.
to performing folk music.
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Aquestes sensacions no són favorables
per a tocar música folk.
per a tocar música folk.
01:48
(Laughter)
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(Riures)
01:49
I mean, your nervous system is an idiot.
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Vull dir, el sistema nerviós és idiota.
01:52
Really? Two hundred thousand years of human evolution, and it still can't tell the difference
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De veritat? Dos cents mil anys d'evolució humana
i encara no sap diferenciar
i encara no sap diferenciar
01:56
between a saber tooth tiger and 20 folksingers
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entre un tigre de dents de sabre i 20 cantants de folk
01:58
on a Tuesday night open mic?
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en un dimarts de micròfon obert?
02:00
(Laughter)
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(Riures)
02:02
I have never been more terrified -- until now.
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Mai no havia passat tanta por... fins ara.
02:06
(Laughter and cheers)
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(Riures i expressions d'ànim)
02:15
So then it was my turn,
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Així que quan em va tocar a mi,
02:17
and somehow, I get myself onto
the stage, I start my song,
the stage, I start my song,
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d'alguna manera vaig pujar a l'escenari
i vaig començar a cantar,
i vaig començar a cantar,
02:20
I open my mouth to sing the first line,
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obro la boca per cantar la primera línia,
02:23
and this completely horrible vibrato --
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i em surt un "vibrato" totalment horrible...
02:25
you know, when your voice wavers --
comes streaming out.
comes streaming out.
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d'aquells que fan que la veu tremoli...
que surti així, de cop.
que surti així, de cop.
02:27
And this is not the good kind of vibrato,
like an opera singer has,
like an opera singer has,
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I no el bon tipus de vibrato,
com el d'un cantant d'òpera,
com el d'un cantant d'òpera,
02:30
this is my whole body just convulsing with fear.
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sinó el meu cos sencer convulsionant de por.
02:33
I mean, it's a nightmare.
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Un veritable malson.
02:34
I'm embarrassed, the audience
is clearly uncomfortable,
is clearly uncomfortable,
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Estic avergonyit, el públic està clarament incòmode,
02:37
they're focused on my discomfort.
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es fixen en el meu malestar.
02:39
It was so bad.
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Va ser terrible.
02:43
But that was my first real experience
as a solo singer-songwriter.
as a solo singer-songwriter.
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Però va ser la meva primera experiència real
com a cantautor en solitari.
com a cantautor en solitari.
02:47
And something good did happen --
I had the tiniest little glimpse
I had the tiniest little glimpse
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I va passar una cosa bona:
vaig experimentar un petit centelleig
vaig experimentar un petit centelleig
02:50
of that audience connection that I was hoping for.
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de la conexió que esperava trobar amb l'audiència.
02:52
And I wanted more. But I knew
I had to get past this nervousness.
I had to get past this nervousness.
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I en volia més. Però sabia
que havia de superar aquest nerviosisme.
que havia de superar aquest nerviosisme.
02:56
That night I promised myself:
I would go back every week
I would go back every week
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Aquella nit em vaig prometre
que hi tornaria cada setmana
que hi tornaria cada setmana
03:00
until I wasn't nervous anymore.
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fins que ja no em posés nerviós.
03:02
And I did. I went back every single week,
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I ho vaig fer. Hi vaig tornar cada setmana,
03:04
and sure enough, week after week,
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i òbviament, setmana rere setmana,
03:08
it didn't get any better. The same
thing happened every week. (Laughter)
thing happened every week. (Laughter)
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no vaig millorar gens. Em passava el mateix
cada setmana. (Riures)
cada setmana. (Riures)
03:12
I couldn't shake it.
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No me'n podia desfer.
03:14
And that's when I had an epiphany.
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I llavors és quan vaig tenir una revelació.
03:16
And I remember it really well, because I
don't have a lot of epiphanies. (Laughter)
don't have a lot of epiphanies. (Laughter)
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I me'n recordo molt bé, perquè no
n'acostumo a tenir gaires. (Riures)
n'acostumo a tenir gaires. (Riures)
03:22
All I had to do was write a song
that exploits my nervousness.
that exploits my nervousness.
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El que havia de fer era escriure una canço
que s'aprofités del meu nerviosisme.
que s'aprofités del meu nerviosisme.
03:26
That only seems authentic when I have stage fright,
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Que només semblés autèntica quan tingués por escènica,
03:28
and the more nervous I was,
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i que com més nerviós estigués,
03:29
the better the song would be. Easy.
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millor sonés. Fàcil.
03:32
So I started writing a song about having stage fright.
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Així que vaig començar a escriure
una cançó sobre la por escènica.
una cançó sobre la por escènica.
03:36
First, fessing up to the problem,
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Primer, confessant el problema,
03:39
the physical manifestations, how I would feel,
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les manifestacions físiques, com em sentia,
03:40
how the listener might feel.
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com es podia sentir l'espectador.
03:42
And then accounting for things like my shaky voice,
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Fent la por responsable de coses com la meva veu tremolosa,
03:44
and I knew I would be singing about a
half-octave higher than normal,
half-octave higher than normal,
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i sabia que cantaria mitja octava més amunt que normalment,
03:47
because I was nervous.
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perquè estaria nerviós.
03:49
By having a song that explained
what was happening to me,
what was happening to me,
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En tenir una cançó que expliqués
el que m'estava passant,
el que m'estava passant,
03:53
while it was happening,
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mentre m'estava pasant,
03:54
that gave the audience permission to think about it.
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això donava permís a l'audiència per pensar-hi.
03:56
They didn't have to feel bad
for me because I was nervous,
for me because I was nervous,
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No s'havien de sentir malament per mi
perquè estés nerviós,
perquè estés nerviós,
03:59
they could experience that with me,
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podien experimentar-ho amb mi,
04:00
and we were all one big happy, nervous,
uncomfortable family. (Laughter)
uncomfortable family. (Laughter)
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i érem una gran família feliç, nerviosa i incòmoda. (Riures)
04:06
By thinking about my audience,
by embracing and exploiting my problem,
by embracing and exploiting my problem,
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En pensar en la meva audiència,
en acceptar i aprofitar el meu problema,
en acceptar i aprofitar el meu problema,
04:10
I was able to take something
that was blocking my progress,
that was blocking my progress,
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vaig ser capaç d'agafar
el que bloquejava el meu progrés,
el que bloquejava el meu progrés,
04:13
and turn it into something that
was essential for my success.
was essential for my success.
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i convertir-ho en un element essencial per a l'èxit.
04:17
And having the stage fright song let
me get past that biggest issue
me get past that biggest issue
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I tenir la cançó sobre la por escènica
em va permetre deixar-la enrere
em va permetre deixar-la enrere
04:20
right in the beginning of a performance.
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ben al principi de cada actuació.
04:22
And then I could move on,
and play the rest of my songs
and play the rest of my songs
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Llavors podia seguir endavant,
i tocar la resta de les meves cançons
i tocar la resta de les meves cançons
04:24
with just a little bit more ease.
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una mica més alleugerit.
04:27
And eventually, over time, I didn't
have to play the stage fright song at all.
have to play the stage fright song at all.
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I finalment, amb el temps, ja no em va caldre tocar la cançó de la por escènica.
04:33
Except for when I was really
nervous, like now. (Laughter)
nervous, like now. (Laughter)
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Excepte quan estava nerviós de veritat, com ara. (Riures)
04:40
Would it be okay if I played the
stage fright song for you?
stage fright song for you?
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Us sembla bé que us toqui la cançó de la por escènica?
04:43
(Applause)
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(Aplaudiments)
04:52
Can I have a sip of water?
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Puc beure un glop d'aigua?
04:55
(Music)
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(Música)
05:00
Thank you.
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Gràcies.
05:07
♫ I'm not joking, you know, ♫
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♫ No faig broma, sabeu, ♫
05:10
♫ this stage fright is real. ♫
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♫ la meva por escènica és real. ♫
05:15
♫ And if I'm up here trembling and singing, ♫
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♫ I si estic aquí tremolant i cantant, ♫
05:19
♫ well, you'll know how I feel. ♫
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♫ bé, doncs ja sabeu com em sento. ♫
05:23
♫ And the mistake I'd be making, ♫
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♫ I com m'equivocaria, ♫
05:27
♫ the tremolo caused by my whole body shaking. ♫
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♫ i el tremolo causat pels tremolors del meu cos sencer.♫
05:31
♫ As you sit there feeling embarrassed for me, ♫
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♫ Mentre vosaltres esteu aquí sentint llàstima per mi, ♫
05:34
♫ well, you don't have to be. ♫
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♫ bé, no cal que en sentiu. ♫
05:37
♫ Well, maybe just a little bit. ♫
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♫ O potser una mica si. ♫
05:40
(Laughter)
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(Riures)
05:41
♫ And maybe I'll try to imagine
you all without clothes. ♫
you all without clothes. ♫
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♫ I potser intentaré imaginar que esteu despullats. ♫
05:49
♫ But singing in front of all naked strangers
scares me more than anyone knows. ♫
scares me more than anyone knows. ♫
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♫ Però cantar davant d'un munt d'extranys despullats em fa més por que res ♫
05:57
♫ Not to discuss this at length, ♫
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♫ No cal parlar d'això en detall, ♫
06:01
♫ but my body image was never my strength. ♫
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♫ però la meva imatge corporal mai ha estat el meu fort. ♫
06:06
♫ So frankly, I wish that you all would get dressed, ♫
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♫ Així que francament, tant de bo us vestíssiu ♫
06:10
♫ I mean, you're not even really naked. ♫
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♫ Vull dir, en realitat no esteu ni despullats. ♫
06:15
♫ And I'm the one with the problem. ♫
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♫ I jo sóc el que tinc el problema. ♫
06:18
♫ And you tell me, don't worry
so much, you'll be great. ♫
so much, you'll be great. ♫
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♫ I em dieu "No et preocupis tant, ho faràs molt bé".♫
06:25
♫ But I'm the one living with me ♫
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♫ Però jo sóc el que viu amb mi mateix ♫
06:28
♫ and I know how I get. ♫
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♫ i se com em poso. ♫
06:30
♫ Your advice is gentle but late. ♫
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♫ El vostre consell és amable però arriba tard. ♫
06:35
♫ If not just a bit patronizing. ♫
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♫ I potser una mica condescendent. ♫
06:38
♫ And that sarcastic tone doesn't
help me when I sing. ♫
help me when I sing. ♫
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♫ I aquest to sarcàstic no m'ajuda quan canto. ♫
06:43
♫ But we shouldn't talk about
these things right now, ♫
these things right now, ♫
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♫ Però no hauríem de parlar d'això ara mateix, ♫
06:47
♫ really, I'm up on stage, and
you're in the crowd. Hi. ♫
you're in the crowd. Hi. ♫
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♫ de veritat, jo estic a l'escenari i vosaltres al públic. Ei.♫
06:54
♫ And I'm not making fun of
unnurtured, irrrational fear, ♫
unnurtured, irrrational fear, ♫
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♫ I no estic fent broma d'una por racional i adquirida, ♫
07:03
♫ and if I wasn't ready to face this, ♫
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♫ i si no estigués disposat a afrontar-la, ♫
07:06
♫ I sure as hell wouldn't be here. ♫
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♫ ben segur que no estaria aquí. ♫
07:10
♫ But if I belt one note out clearly, ♫
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♫ I si se m'escapa una nota clarament, ♫
07:15
♫ you'll know I'm recovering slowly but surely. ♫
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♫ sabreu que m'estic recuperant sense pressa però sense pausa. ♫
07:20
♫ And maybe next week, I'll set my guitar ringin' ♫
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♫ I potser la setmana que ve, posaré en marxa la meva guitarra ♫
07:24
♫ my voice clear as water, and everyone singin'. ♫
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♫ la meva veu clara com l'aigua, i tothom cantant. ♫
07:28
♫ But probably I'll just get up and start groovin', ♫
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♫ Però probablement m'aixecaré i ho disfrutaré ♫
07:32
♫ my vocal cords movin', ♫
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♫ mentre les meves cordes vocals ♫
07:35
♫ at speeds slightly faster than sound. ♫
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♫ es mouen a més velocitat que el so. ♫
07:48
(Applause)
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(Aplaudiments)
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Joe Kowan - Musician and graphic designerBy day he's a graphic designer, and by night Joe Kowan is a quirky folk singer-songwriter.
Why you should listen
Joe Kowan is a Boston-based musician and graphic designer who has been struggling with stage fright since he first started writing songs at age 27. Despite his adorably expressed fears, he charms audiences with his own style of quirky folk and acoustic hip-hop, by turns poignant, salacious and comical. In 2009 he released the gangsta' arts and crafts video for his original song “Crafty,” and in 2011 he was a finalist in the USA Songwriting Competition.
Kowan is a senior graphic designer on State Street Global Marketing’s Brand Strategy team. With a BFA in sculpture and design, his work explores diverse areas of design including scenic, print, environmental design and wayfinding.
Joe Kowan | Speaker | TED.com