TED2014
Isabel Allende: How to live passionately—no matter your age
Isabel Allende: Como vivir apaixoadamente -sen importar a idade-
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Isabel Allende ten 71 anos. E sí, ten un par de enrugas, pero tamén unha incrible perspectiva. Nesta doce charla, dirixida a público de todas as idades, fala sobre os seus medos a medida que vai envellecendo, e sobre como planea seguir vivindo paxaidoamente.
Isabel Allende - Novelist
Isabel Allende writes stories of passion. Her novels and memoirs, including The House of the Spirits and Eva Luna, tell the stories of women and men who live with passionate commitment -- to love, to their world, to an ideal. Full bio
Isabel Allende writes stories of passion. Her novels and memoirs, including The House of the Spirits and Eva Luna, tell the stories of women and men who live with passionate commitment -- to love, to their world, to an ideal. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:13
Hi, kids.
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Ola, rapaces.
00:14
(Laughter)
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(Risas)
00:16
I'm 71.
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Teño 71 anos.
00:18
(Applause)
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(Aplausos)
00:20
My husband is 76.
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O meu home ten 76.
00:23
My parents are in their late 90s,
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Os meus pais están no final dos 90
00:27
and Olivia, the dog, is 16.
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e Olivia, a cadela, ten 16.
00:29
So let's talk about aging.
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Falemos entón de envellecer.
00:32
Let me tell you how I feel
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Direivos como me sinto
00:33
when I see my wrinkles in the mirror
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cando vexo as miñas engurras no espello
00:36
and I realize that some parts of me have dropped
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e doume de conta que algunhas
partes de min caeron
partes de min caeron
00:39
and I can't find them down there.
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e non as podo atopar, alá abaixo.
00:42
(Laughter)
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(Risas)
00:43
Mary Oliver says in one of her poems,
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Mary Oliver di nun dos seus poemas,
00:46
"Tell me, what is it that you plan to do
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"Dime, que é o que pensas facer
00:50
with your one wild and precious life?"
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coa túa única salvaxe e preciada vida?"
00:53
Me, I intend to live passionately.
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Eu, pretendo vivir apaixonadamente.
00:58
When do we start aging?
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¿Cando comezamos a envellecer?
01:00
Society decides when we are old,
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As sociedades deciden cando somos vellos,
01:02
usually around 65, when we get Medicare,
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normalmente ao redor dos 65,
cando nos dan Medicare
cando nos dan Medicare
01:06
but we really start aging at birth.
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pero en realidade comezamos a envellecer
cando nacemos.
cando nacemos.
01:09
We are aging right now,
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Estamos envellecendo agora mesmo,
01:11
and we all experience it differently.
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e todos o experimentamos
dunha maneira distinta.
dunha maneira distinta.
01:14
We all feel younger than our real age,
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Todos nos sentimos máis novos
da nosa idade real,
da nosa idade real,
01:18
because the spirit never ages.
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porque o espírito nunca envellece.
01:20
I am still 17.
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Eu todavía teño 17 anos.
01:23
Sophia Loren. Look at her.
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Sophia Loren. Mírena.
01:27
She says that everything you see
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Di que todo o que vedes
01:29
she owes to spaghetti.
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llo debe aos espaguetis.
01:32
I tried it and gained 10 pounds
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Eu intenteino e engordei 4 kilos
01:34
in the wrong places.
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nos lugares equivocados.
01:36
But attitude, aging is also attitude and health.
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Pero actitude, envellecer e tamén
actitude e saúde.
actitude e saúde.
01:41
But my real mentor in this journey of aging
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Pero a miña mentora
nesta viaxe de envellecer
nesta viaxe de envellecer
01:45
is Olga Murray.
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é Olga Murray.
01:47
This California girl at 60
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Esta moza californiana aos 60
01:49
started working in Nepal to save young girls
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comezou a traballar en Nepal
para salvar a rapazas novas
para salvar a rapazas novas
01:53
from domestic bondage.
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da escravitude doméstica.
01:55
At 88, she has saved 12,000 girls,
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Aos 88, ten salvado a 12.000 rapazas,
02:00
and she has changed the culture in the country.
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e cambiado a cultura no país.
02:02
(Applause)
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(Aplausos)
02:03
Now it is illegal for fathers
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Agora é ilegal que os pais
02:07
to sell their daughters into servitude.
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vendan as súas fillas para a servidume.
02:10
She has also founded orphanages
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Tamén fundou orfanatos
02:12
and nutritional clinics.
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a clínicas nutricionais.
02:14
She is always happy
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Sempre está feliz
02:16
and eternally young.
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e eternamente nova.
02:19
What have I lost in the last decades?
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¿Que perdín nas últimas décadas?
02:23
People, of course,
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Xente, por suposto,
02:26
places, and the boundless energy of my youth,
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lugares, e a enerxía inesgotable
da miña xuventude,
da miña xuventude,
02:29
and I'm beginning to lose independence,
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e estou empezando a perder independencia,
02:31
and that scares me.
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e iso dame medo.
02:34
Ram Dass says that dependency hurts,
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Ram Dass di que a dependencia manca,
02:38
but if you accept it, there is less suffering.
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pero si a aceptas, hai menos sufrimento.
02:41
After a very bad stroke,
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Despois dun mal derrame,
02:43
his ageless soul watches the changes
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a súa alma sen idade ve os cambios
02:46
in the body with tenderness,
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do corpo con tenrura,
02:48
and he is grateful to the people who help him.
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e está agradecido á xente que o axudou.
02:53
What have I gained?
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¿Que gañei?
02:56
Freedom: I don't have to prove anything anymore.
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Liberdade: xa non teño que demostrar nada.
03:00
I'm not stuck in the idea of who I was,
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Non estou anclada na idea de quen fun,
03:03
who I want to be,
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quen quero ser,
03:04
or what other people expect me to be.
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ou que espera a xente que sexa.
03:08
I don't have to please men anymore,
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Xa non teño que compracer aos homes,
03:12
only animals.
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só aos animais.
03:15
I keep telling my superego to back off
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Non paro de dicirlle ao meu super ego
que retroceda
que retroceda
03:18
and let me enjoy what I still have.
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e me deixe desfutar o que aínda teño.
03:20
My body may be falling apart,
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Pode que o meu corpo
se estea a desbaratar,
se estea a desbaratar,
03:22
but my brain is not, yet.
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pero a miña cabeza non, aínda.
03:26
I love my brain.
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Encántame o meu cerebro.
03:28
I feel lighter.
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Síntome máis lixeira.
03:31
I don't carry grudges, ambition, vanity,
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Non cargo con rencor, ambición, vanidade,
03:36
none of the deadly sins that are not even
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ningún dos pecados capitais
03:38
worth the trouble.
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que nin sequera pagan a pena.
03:40
It's great to let go.
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É xenial deixar ir.
03:42
I should have started sooner.
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Debería ter empezado antes.
03:44
And I also feel softer
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Tamén me sinto máis blanda
03:47
because I'm not scared of being vulnerable.
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porque non me asusta ser vulnerable.
03:51
I don't see it as weakness anymore.
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Xa non o vexo como unha debilidade.
03:54
And I've gained spirituality.
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E gañei espiritualidade.
03:57
I'm aware that before,
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Son consciente de que antes,
03:59
death was in the neighborhood.
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a morte estaba no barrio.
04:01
Now, it's next door, or in my house.
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Agora, está ao lado, ou na miña casa.
04:06
I try to live mindfully
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Procuro vivir conscientemente
04:09
and be present in the moment.
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e estar presente no momento.
04:11
By the way, the Dalai Lama
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Por certo, o Dalai Lama
04:13
is someone who has aged beautifully,
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é alguén que envelleceu marabillosamente,
04:15
but who wants to be vegetarian and celibate?
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pero quen quere ser vexetariano e célibe?
04:17
(Laughter)
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(Risas)
04:24
Meditation helps.
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A meditación axuda.
04:27
(Video) Child: Ommm. Ommm. Ommm.
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(Video) Neno: Ommmm. Ommm. Ommmm.
04:31
Isabel Allende: Ommm. Ommm. There it is.
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Isabel Allende: Ommm. Ommm. Ahí o tedes.
04:33
And it's good to start early.
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E é bo empezar pronto.
04:35
You know, for a vain female like myself,
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Sabedes, para unha muller
vaidosa coma min,
vaidosa coma min,
04:39
it's very hard to age in this culture.
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é moi dificil envellecer nesta cultura.
04:42
Inside, I feel good, I feel charming, seductive, sexy.
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Por dentro, síntome ben,
síntome encantadora, seductora, sexy.
síntome encantadora, seductora, sexy.
04:47
Nobody else sees that. (Laughter)
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Ninguén máis ve iso. (Risas)
04:50
I'm invisible.
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Son invisible.
04:52
I want to be the center of attention.
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Quero ser o centro de atención.
04:53
I hate to be invisible.
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Odio ser invisible.
04:57
(Laughter) (Applause)
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(Risas) (Aplausos)
04:59
This is Grace Dammann.
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Esta é Grace Dammann.
05:01
She has been in a wheelchair for six years
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Leva seis anos nunha cadeira de rodas
05:03
after a terrible car accident.
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despois dun terrible accidente de coche.
05:05
She says that there is nothing more sensual
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Di que non hai nada máis sensual
05:09
than a hot shower,
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que unha ducha quente,
05:11
that every drop of water
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que cada gota de auga
05:13
is a blessing to the senses.
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é unha bendición para os sentidos.
05:16
She doesn't see herself as disabled.
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Non se ve como unha discapacitada.
05:18
In her mind, she's still surfing in the ocean.
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Na súa mente,
ela aínda esta surfeando no océano.
ela aínda esta surfeando no océano.
05:22
Ethel Seiderman, a feisty, beloved activist
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Ethel Seiderman,
unha loitadora e querida activista
unha loitadora e querida activista
05:27
in the place where I live in California.
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no lugar onde vivo en California.
05:30
She wears red patent shoes,
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Leva zapatos vermellos,
05:33
and her mantra is that one scarf is nice
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e o seu mantra é que unha bufanda está ben
05:36
but two is better.
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pero dúas están mellor.
05:38
She has been a widow for nine years,
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Leva nove anos viúva,
05:40
but she's not looking for another mate.
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pero non está a buscar outro compañeiro.
05:42
She says that there is only a limited number
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Di que hai só un número limitado
05:45
of ways you can screw —
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de maneiras de meter a pata
05:48
well, she says it in another way —
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-- ben, ela dío doutra maneira --
05:50
and she has tried them all.
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e xa as probou todas.
05:52
(Laughter)
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(Risas)
05:55
I, on the other hand,
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Eu, por outra parte,
05:56
I still have erotic fantasies with Antonio Banderas —
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aínda teño fantasías eróticas con
Antonio Banderas
Antonio Banderas
06:00
(Laughter) —
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(Risas)
06:01
and my poor husband has to put up with it.
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E o meu pobre marido
ten que apandar con iso.
ten que apandar con iso.
06:05
So how can I stay passionate?
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Entón ¿como podo manterme apaixonada?
06:07
I cannot will myself to be passionate at 71.
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Non chega querer ser apaixonada aos 71.
06:11
I have been training for some time,
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Estiven adestrando un dende hai tempo,
06:14
and when I feel flat and bored, I fake it.
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e cando me sinto desanimada
e aburrida, finxo.
e aburrida, finxo.
06:17
Attitude, attitude.
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Actitude, actitude.
06:20
How do I train? I train by saying yes
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¿Como entreno? Entreno dicindo que si
06:23
to whatever comes my way:
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a todo o que veña:
06:25
drama, comedy, tragedy,
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drama, comedia, traxedia,
06:27
love, death, losses.
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amor, morte, pérdidas.
06:30
Yes to life.
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Si á vida.
06:33
And I train by trying to stay in love.
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E entreno tratando de
permanecer namorada.
permanecer namorada.
06:36
It doesn't always work,
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Non sempre funciona,
06:37
but you cannot blame me for trying.
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pero non poden culparme por intentalo.
06:40
And, on a final note,
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E, como nota final,
06:43
retirement in Spanish is jubilación.
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a retirada laboral
en español é jubilación.
en español é jubilación.
06:47
Jubilation. Celebration.
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Xúbilo. Celebración.
06:49
We have paid our dues.
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Pagamos as nosas débedas.
06:51
We have contributed to society.
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Contribuímos á sociedade.
06:53
Now it's our time, and it's a great time.
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Agora é o noso tempo,
e é un tempo fantástico.
e é un tempo fantástico.
06:56
Unless you are ill or very poor,
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A non ser que esteas enfermo,
ou sexas moi pobre
ou sexas moi pobre
06:59
you have choices.
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tes opcións.
07:01
I have chosen to stay passionate,
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Eu elexín manterme apaixonada,
07:04
engaged with an open heart.
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comprometida cun corazón aberto.
07:06
I am working on it every day.
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Estou a traballar niso cada día.
07:09
Want to join me?
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¿Queredes unirvos?
07:12
Thank you.
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Gracias.
07:14
(Applause)
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(Aplausos)
07:19
June Cohen: So Isabel —
IA: Thank you.
IA: Thank you.
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June Cohen: Entón Isabel --
IA: Gracias.
IA: Gracias.
07:23
JC: First of all,
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JC: Primeiro de todo,
07:26
I never like to presume to
speak for the TED community,
speak for the TED community,
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Nunca me gusta supoñer que falo
pola comunidade TED,
pola comunidade TED,
07:29
but I would like to tell you that I have a feeling
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Pero quixera dicirche
que teño o sentimento
que teño o sentimento
07:31
we can all agree that you are still charming,
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de que estamos todos de acordo
que aínda eres encantadora,
que aínda eres encantadora,
07:33
seductive and sexy. Yes?
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seductora e sexy. ¿Si?
07:35
IA: Aww, thank you.
(Applause)
(Applause)
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IA: Ohh, gracias
(Aplausos)
(Aplausos)
07:37
JC: Hands down.
IA: No, it's makeup.
IA: No, it's makeup.
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JC: Sen dúbida.
IA: Non, é maquillaxe.
IA: Non, é maquillaxe.
07:40
Moderator: Now, would it be awkward
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JC: Agora, ¿sería raro
07:41
if I asked you a follow-up question
about your erotic fantasies?
about your erotic fantasies?
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se che preguntara sobre
as túas fantasías eróticas?
as túas fantasías eróticas?
07:44
IA: Oh, of course. About what?
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IA: Oh, Por suposto. ¿Sobre que?
07:46
(Laughter)
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(Risas)
07:47
Moderator: About your erotic fantasies.
IA: With Antonio Banderas.
IA: With Antonio Banderas.
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JC: Sobre as túas fantasías eróticas.
IA: Con Antonio Banderas.
IA: Con Antonio Banderas.
07:50
Moderator: I was just wondering
if you have anything more to share.
if you have anything more to share.
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JC: Simplemente me estaba pregunando
se tiñas algo máis que compartir.
se tiñas algo máis que compartir.
07:52
IA: Well, one of them is that — (Laughter)
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IA: Ben, unha delas é que -- (Risas)
07:58
One of them is that I place a naked Antonio Banderas
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Unha delas é que poño un
Antonio Banderas espido
Antonio Banderas espido
08:00
on a Mexican tortilla,
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nunha tortilla mexicana,
08:03
I slather him with guacamole and salsa,
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úntoo con guacamole e salsa,
08:06
I roll him up, and I eat him. (Laughter)
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enróloo, e o como. (Risas)
08:10
Thank you.
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Gracias.
08:12
(Applause)
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(Aplausos)
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Isabel Allende - NovelistIsabel Allende writes stories of passion. Her novels and memoirs, including The House of the Spirits and Eva Luna, tell the stories of women and men who live with passionate commitment -- to love, to their world, to an ideal.
Why you should listen
As a novelist and memoirist, Isabel Allende writes of passionate lives, including her own. Born into a Chilean family with political ties, she went into exile in the United States in the 1970s—an event that, she believes, created her as a writer. Her voice blends sweeping narrative with touches of magical realism; her stories are romantic, in the very best sense of the word. Her novels include The House of the Spirits, Eva Luna and The Stories of Eva Luna, and her latest, Maya's Notebook and Ripper. And don't forget her adventure trilogy for young readers— City of the Beasts, Kingdom of the Golden Dragon and Forest of the Pygmies.
As a memoirist, she has written about her vision of her lost Chile, in My Invented Country, and movingly tells the story of her life to her own daughter, in Paula. Her book Aphrodite: A Memoir of the Senses memorably linked two sections of the bookstore that don't see much crossover: Erotica and Cookbooks. Just as vital is her community work: The Isabel Allende Foundation works with nonprofits in the San Francisco Bay Area and Chile to empower and protect women and girls—understanding that empowering women is the only true route to social and economic justice.
Isabel Allende | Speaker | TED.com