ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Al Vernacchio - Sexuality educator
In his 12th-grade Sexuality and Society class, Al Vernacchio speaks honestly and positively about human sexuality.

Why you should listen

Al Vernacchio teaches at Friends’ Central, a private Quaker school just outside Philadelphia. His positive, enthusiastic and often humorous approach to comprehensive sexuality education (rather than abstinence-only education) has made “Mr. V.” a popular speaker -- and has recently brought him to the attention of the New York Times Magazine, which profiled his class in the November 20, 2011, cover story "Teaching Good Sex". When not talking about sexuality, Vernacchio teaches English and is the faculty moderator of the school's Gay-Straight Alliance. He's also a seasoned wedding officiant.

More profile about the speaker
Al Vernacchio | Speaker | TED.com
TED2012

Al Vernacchio: Sex needs a new metaphor. Here's one ...

Al Vernacchio: 性爱需要一个新的比喻。这儿就有一个...

Filmed:
2,110,982 views

教育学家 - 阿尔·韦尔纳希奥说,出于某种原因,在美国谈论性的所有比喻都来自棒球 - 得分、到达一垒, 等等。问题是,这让性变成一种竞争,有赢家和输家。与此相反,他提出了一个新的模式,一个更侧重于分享快乐、协调讨论、共同实现和享受的模式。让我们一起聊聊...披萨模式。
- Sexuality educator
In his 12th-grade Sexuality and Society class, Al Vernacchio speaks honestly and positively about human sexuality. Full bio

Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.

00:12
I'd like to talk to you today今天
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今天我要给大家介绍一种
00:14
about a whole整个 new way to think about sexual有性 activity活动
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通过比较方法
00:19
and sexuality性欲 education教育, by comparison对照.
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得出的对性行为和性教育的全新认识
00:23
If you talk to someone有人 today今天 in America美国
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如今当你和美国人谈论
00:25
about sexual有性 activity活动,
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性行为,
00:27
you'll你会 find pretty漂亮 soon不久 you're not just talking
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很快就会发现你们谈的不光是
00:31
about sexual有性 activity活动.
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性行为
00:32
You're also talking about baseball棒球.
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你们也在谈论棒球
00:35
Because baseball棒球 is the dominant优势 cultural文化 metaphor隐喻
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因为棒球是美国人用来
00:40
that Americans美国人 use to think about
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思考和谈论性行为的
00:42
and talk about sexual有性 activity活动,
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主流文化暗喻
00:45
and we know that because there's
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大家都心知肚明
00:47
all this language语言 in English英语
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这些英文字眼
00:49
that seems似乎 to be talking about baseball棒球
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听起来像是在谈棒球
00:52
but that's really talking about sexual有性 activity活动.
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但其实是在谈性行为
00:56
So, for example, you can be a pitcher投手 or a catcher捕手,
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比方说,你可能是一名“ 投手” 或是 “ 捕手”
00:59
and that corresponds对应 to whether是否 you
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这其实是指你是
01:01
perform演出 a sexual有性 act法案 or receive接收 a sexual有性 act法案.
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主动性行为者还是被动性行为者
01:05
Of course课程, there are the bases基地,
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当然,还有“ 垒”,
01:06
which哪一个 refer参考 to specific具体 sexual有性 activities活动
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暗指按具体顺序进行的
01:09
that happen发生 in a very specific具体 order订购,
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某个具体的性行为,
01:12
ultimately最终 resulting造成 in scoring得分 a run
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最终达到了“ 跑垒成功”
01:15
or hitting a home run,
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或者“ 本垒打” 的效果,
01:16
which哪一个 is usually平时 having vaginal阴道 intercourse交往
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这通常是指进行阴道性交
01:18
to the point of orgasm性高潮,
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达到了高潮
01:20
at least最小 for the guy.
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至少对男生来说
01:23
(Laughter笑声)
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(笑声)
01:24
You can strike罢工 out, which哪一个 means手段
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你可以”三振出局“
01:26
you don't get to have any sexual有性 activity活动.
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意味着您今天没爱可做
01:28
And if you're a benchwarmer板凳队员,
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如果您是一位“ 板凳队员”
01:30
you might威力 be a virgin处女 or somebody who for
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您可能是一个处女(子)或者处于某种原因
01:32
whatever随你 reason原因 isn't in the game游戏,
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还未能“ 参赛”
01:34
maybe because of your age年龄 or because of your ability能力
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也许是您的年龄或是能力
01:38
or because of your skillset技能.
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或是技巧
01:41
A bat's蝙蝠的 a penis阴茎,
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“ 球棍” 指的是阴茎
01:42
and a nappy尿布 dugout独木舟 is a vulva外阴, or a vagina阴道.
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而“ 球员休息区” 则暗指阴道
01:46
A glove手套 or a catcher's接球手 mitt手套 is a condom避孕套.
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“ 捕手的手套” 指的是安全套
01:49
A switch-hitter开关安打 is a bisexual双性恋 person,
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而“ 左右全能的击球手” 是“ 双性恋”
01:52
and we gay同性恋者 and lesbian女同性恋 folks乡亲 play for the other team球队.
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而我们“ 男女同性恋” 则是为对手卖力的
01:56
And then there's this one:
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还有一个
01:59
"if there's grass on the field领域, play ball."
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“如果地上有草,就玩球吧。”
02:03
And that usually平时 refers to
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而这实际上指的是
02:05
if a young年轻 person, specifically特别 often经常 a young年轻 woman女人,
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如果一个年轻人,特别是一个年轻女孩儿
02:08
is old enough足够 to have pubic耻骨 hair头发,
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已经成熟到长阴毛的话
02:10
she's old enough足够 to have sex性别 with.
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她也就是可以有性行为
02:13
This baseball棒球 model模型 is incredibly令人难以置信 problematic问题.
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这个棒球模式是很有问题的
02:16
It's sexist性别歧视. It's heterosexist异性恋.
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它带有性别歧视和性取向(对同性恋)歧视。
02:18
It's competitive竞争的. It's goal-directed目标导向.
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它充满了竞争和太具有目的性。
02:21
And it can't result结果 in healthy健康 sexuality性欲
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而且这个模式无法推进健康性生活
02:23
developing发展 in young年轻 people or in adults成年人.
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在年轻人或者成年人中的发展
02:26
So we need a new model模型.
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所以我们需要一个新的模式
02:28
I'm here today今天 to offer提供 you that new model模型.
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我今天来就是为大家提供那个新模式的
02:31
And it's based基于 on
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它的基础是
02:33
pizza比萨.
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披萨饼
02:34
Now pizza比萨 is something that is universally举世 understood了解
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披萨嘛,全世界都知道
02:38
and that most people associate关联 with a positive experience经验.
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而且大多数人都把它跟美好的经历联系起来
02:41
So let's do this.
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那么我们开始吧
02:42
Let's take baseball棒球 and pizza比萨 and compare比较 it
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让我们把棒球和比萨饼放在一起
02:45
when talking about three aspects方面 of sexual有性 activity活动:
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比较一下下面关于性行为的三个方面
02:48
the trigger触发 for sexual有性 activity活动,
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性行为的开端
02:50
what happens发生 during sexual有性 activity活动,
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性行为过程中发生了什么
02:52
and the expected预期 outcome结果 of sexual有性 activity活动.
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以及性行为的预期结果
02:55
So when do you play baseball棒球?
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请问大家什么时候可以打棒球
02:58
You play baseball棒球 when it's baseball棒球 season季节
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通常是在赛季
03:00
and when there's a game游戏 on the schedule时间表.
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有赛程安排才能打
03:03
It's not exactly究竟 your choice选择.
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这不是你自己可以选择的
03:05
So if it's prom舞会 night or a wedding婚礼 night
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如果碰巧有舞会或婚礼
03:08
or at a party派对 or if our parents父母 aren't home,
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或者有开派对又或者是你父母不在家
03:11
hey, it's just batter面糊 up.
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嘿,抓紧时间,好好打吧
03:14
Can you imagine想像 saying to your coach教练,
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你能想象跟教练说,
03:15
"Uh, I'm not really feeling感觉 it today今天,
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“ 恩,我今天没感觉
03:18
I think I'll sit this game游戏 out."
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我想我就不参加这次的比赛了。“
03:20
That's just not the way it happens发生.
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根本没门儿
03:22
And when you get together一起 to play baseball棒球,
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而且当大家聚到一起打棒球的时候
03:24
immediately立即 you're with two opposing反对 teams球队,
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马上就会出现两个对立的球队
03:27
one playing播放 offense罪行, one playing播放 defense防御,
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一队进攻,一队防守
03:29
somebody's某人的 trying to move移动 deeper更深 into the field领域.
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总有人试图往球场里更进一步
03:32
That's usually平时 a sign标志 to the boy男孩.
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通常是指男孩儿
03:34
Somebody's某人的 trying to defend保卫 people moving移动 into the field领域.
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总有人试图阻止其他人往球场内移动
03:37
That's often经常 given特定 to the girl女孩.
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通常是指女孩儿
03:39
It's competitive竞争的.
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这是一种竞争
03:40
We're not playing播放 with each other.
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我们不是和彼此一同游戏
03:42
We're playing播放 against反对 each other.
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我们是在和彼此竞争
03:43
And when you show显示 up to play baseball棒球,
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而且当你打棒球的时候
03:45
nobody没有人 needs需求 to talk about what we're going to do
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没有人需要告诉你我们下步做什么
03:48
or how this baseball棒球 game游戏 might威力 be good for us.
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或者这场棒球赛对我们有好处
03:50
Everybody每个人 knows知道 the rules规则.
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所有人都知道规则
03:51
You just take your position位置 and play the game游戏.
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你就站到自己的位置开始比赛就行
03:56
But when do you have pizza比萨?
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那你什么时候吃披萨呢
03:58
Well, you have pizza比萨 when you're hungry饥饿 for pizza比萨.
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当你饿了想吃披萨的时候就吃
04:02
It starts启动 with an internal内部 sense, an internal内部 desire欲望, or a need.
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这首先始于一种内在的感受、渴望或是需求
04:07
"Huh. I could go for some pizza比萨."
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“恩。我想要吃披萨。”
04:10
(Laughter笑声)
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(笑声)
04:12
And because it's an internal内部 desire欲望,
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而且因为这是一种内在的渴望
04:15
we actually其实 have some sense of control控制 over that.
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我们其实是可以控制它的
04:17
I could decide决定 that I'm hungry饥饿
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我可以决定我饿了
04:19
but know that it's not a great time to eat.
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但也知道现在不是吃饭的最佳时刻
04:23
And then when we get together一起 with someone有人 for pizza比萨,
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然后当我们和别人一同吃披萨的时候
04:26
we're not competing竞争 with them,
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我们不是在和他们竞争
04:28
we're looking for an experience经验
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我们在寻找一种
04:30
that both of us will share分享
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彼此能够分享的
04:31
that's satisfying满意的 for both of us,
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让双方都感到满足的体验
04:33
and when you get together一起 for pizza比萨 with somebody,
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当你和某人一同吃披萨的时候
04:36
what's the first thing you do?
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你们做的第一件事是什么
04:38
You talk about it.
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你们会先谈一谈
04:40
You talk about what you want.
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你们谈论想要什么
04:41
You talk about what you like.
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你们谈论喜欢什么
04:43
You may可能 even negotiate谈判 it.
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你们甚至会商量一下
04:44
"How do you feel about pepperoni意大利辣味香肠?" (Laughter笑声)
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“你觉得意式辣香肠披萨如何?”(笑声)
04:47
"Not so much, I'm kind of a mushroom蘑菇 guy myself."
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“没什么感觉,我自己更喜欢蘑菇多点的。”
04:50
"Well, maybe we can go half and half."
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“那么,也许我们可以一半一半?”
04:52
And even if you've had pizza比萨 with somebody
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即使你和某人在一起吃披萨
04:54
for a very long time,
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已经很久了
04:57
don't you still say things like,
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你难道不会说,
04:59
"Should we get the usual通常?"
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“还是老三样儿?”
05:01
(Laughter笑声)
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(笑声)
05:02
"Or maybe something a little more adventurous爱冒险的?"
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“或者也许这次吃点新鲜的?”
05:06
Okay, so when you're playing播放 baseball棒球,
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好,当你打棒球的时候
05:08
so if we talk about during sexual有性 activity活动,
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如果我们谈谈性行为的过程
05:10
when you're playing播放 baseball棒球,
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当你打棒球的时候
05:11
you're just supposed应该 to round回合 the bases基地
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你只不过需要按照既定的正确顺序
05:14
in the proper正确 order订购 one at a time.
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把每个垒都跑一遍
05:16
You can't hit击中 the ball and run to right field领域.
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你不能击了球然后想右边跑
05:18
That doesn't work.
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这行不通
05:19
And you also can't get to second第二 base基础 and say,
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而且你也不能在到了二垒的时候说
05:22
"I like it here. I'm going to stay here."
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“我觉得这儿挺好的。我就待在这里了。”
05:26
No.
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不行
05:28
And also, of course课程, with baseball棒球, there's, like,
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而且,当然,对于棒球,你需要
05:30
the specific具体 equipment设备 and a specific具体 skill技能 set.
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有特定的装备和技术
05:32
Not everybody每个人 can play baseball棒球. It's pretty漂亮 exclusive独家.
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不是每个人都能打棒球的,这项运动非常挑剔
05:36
Okay, but what about pizza比萨?
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好的,但是披萨呢?
05:38
When we're trying to figure数字 out what's good for pizza比萨,
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当我们想要弄明白吃什么披萨好的时候,
05:40
isn't it all about what's our pleasure乐趣?
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这不就是关于什么让我们快乐吗
05:43
There are a million百万 different不同 kinds of pizza比萨.
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这里有上百万种不同的披萨
05:45
There's a million百万 different不同 toppings浇头.
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有上百万种不同的陷料
05:47
There's a million百万 different不同 ways方法 to eat pizza比萨.
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也有上百万种不同的吃法
05:49
And none没有 of them are wrong错误. They're different不同.
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没有一个是错误的,它们只是不同罢了
05:52
And in this case案件, difference区别 is good,
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在这种情况下,不同是好的
05:54
because that's going to increase增加 the chance机会
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因为这会增加我们
05:56
that we're having a satisfying满意的 experience经验.
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获得满意体验的几率
05:59
And lastly最后, what's the expected预期 outcome结果 of baseball棒球?
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最后,棒球比赛的期望的结果是什么
06:02
Well, in baseball棒球, you play to win赢得.
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你比赛是为了赢
06:06
You score得分了 as many许多 runs运行 as you can.
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你尽全力得分
06:08
There's always a winner优胜者 in baseball棒球,
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在棒球比赛中总有一个胜者
06:10
and that means手段 there's always a loser失败者 in baseball棒球.
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这就意味着总会有一个失败者
06:14
But what about pizza比萨?
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但是披萨呢
06:15
Well, in pizza比萨, we're not really --
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吃披萨的时候
06:17
there's no winning胜利. How do you win赢得 pizza比萨?
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没有输赢。你怎么能赢披萨?
06:21
You don't. But you do look for,
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你不会。但你确实会问
06:24
"Are we satisfied满意?"
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“我们满意吗?”
06:26
And sometimes有时 that can be different不同 amounts
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而且满意的程度会根据
06:28
over different不同 times or with different不同 people
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不同的时间或者和不同的人或者
06:30
or on different不同 days.
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不同日子而不同
06:32
And we get to decide决定 when we feel satisfied满意.
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而且我们可以自己决定何时感到满足
06:35
If we're still hungry饥饿, we might威力 have some more.
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如果我们还有些饿,我们可以再多吃些
06:38
If you eat too much, though虽然,
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如果你吃得太多,那么
06:40
you just feel gross.
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你就感觉有些恶心了
06:42
(Laughter笑声)
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(笑声)
06:44
So what if we could take this pizza比萨 model模型
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那么如果我们把这个披萨模式
06:47
and overlay覆盖 it on top最佳 of sexuality性欲 education教育?
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应用到性教育上会怎样呢
06:50
A lot of sexuality性欲 education教育 that happens发生 today今天
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当今非常多的性教育
06:53
is so influenced影响 by the baseball棒球 model模型,
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深受棒球模式影响
06:56
and it sets up education教育 that can't help
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这让性教育无法帮助年轻人甚至
07:00
but produce生产 unhealthy不良 sexuality性欲 in young年轻 people.
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造成不健康的性行为
07:04
And those young年轻 people become成为 older旧的 people.
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而那些年轻人又变成老一辈
07:06
But if we could create创建 sexuality性欲 education教育
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但是如果我们可以创造
07:09
that was more like pizza比萨,
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类似于披萨模式的性教育
07:12
we could create创建 education教育 that invites邀请 people
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来启发人们
07:15
to think about their own拥有 desires欲望,
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思考他们自己的渴望
07:17
to make deliberate商榷 decisions决定 about what they want,
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深思熟虑自己想要什么
07:21
to talk about it with their partners伙伴,
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和他们的另一半谈论性
07:23
and to ultimately最终 look for
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然后最终寻找的并不单纯是
07:25
not some external外部 outcome结果
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外在的结果
07:28
but for what feels感觉 satisfying满意的,
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而是什么让我们感觉满足
07:31
and we get to decide决定 that.
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我们有决定权
07:34
You may可能 have noticed注意到
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你也许已经注意到了
07:35
in the baseball棒球 and pizza比萨 comparison对照,
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在棒球模式和披萨饼模式的比较中
07:37
under the baseball棒球, it's all commands命令.
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棒球模式里全都是指令
07:40
They're all exclamation感叹 points.
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全都是惊叹号
07:42
But under the pizza比萨 model模型, they're questions问题.
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但是在披萨饼模式中都是问题
07:45
And who gets得到 to answer回答 those questions问题?
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谁来回答那些问题呢?
07:47
You do. I do.
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你和我
07:51
So remember记得, when we're thinking思维 about
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所以,请记住,当我们思考
07:53
sexuality性欲 education教育 and sexual有性 activity活动,
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性教育和性行为的时候
07:56
baseball棒球, you're out.
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棒球模式已经过时了
07:58
Pizza比萨 is the way to think about healthy健康,
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披萨饼模式才是我们思考健康
08:01
satisfying满意的 sexual有性 activity活动,
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满足的性行为
08:03
and good, comprehensive全面 sexuality性欲 education教育.
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以及正确、全面的性教育的真正王道
08:06
Thank you very much for your time.
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谢谢大家
08:09
(Applause掌声)
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(掌声)
Translated by xuan wang
Reviewed by Julia Xu

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ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Al Vernacchio - Sexuality educator
In his 12th-grade Sexuality and Society class, Al Vernacchio speaks honestly and positively about human sexuality.

Why you should listen

Al Vernacchio teaches at Friends’ Central, a private Quaker school just outside Philadelphia. His positive, enthusiastic and often humorous approach to comprehensive sexuality education (rather than abstinence-only education) has made “Mr. V.” a popular speaker -- and has recently brought him to the attention of the New York Times Magazine, which profiled his class in the November 20, 2011, cover story "Teaching Good Sex". When not talking about sexuality, Vernacchio teaches English and is the faculty moderator of the school's Gay-Straight Alliance. He's also a seasoned wedding officiant.

More profile about the speaker
Al Vernacchio | Speaker | TED.com