Eldra Jackson: How I unlearned dangerous lessons about masculinity
Eldra Jackson: Cómo cortar el ciclo del machismo tóxico
Eldra Jackson III works daily to connect to his most authentic self -- and his calling is to support others in doing the same. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
something to cry about.
una verdadera razón para llorar".
to a disease in our society,
en nuestra sociedad,
to be known as "toxic masculinity."
comúnmente como "machismo",
of a life sentence in prison
sentenciado a cadena perpetua
and attempted murder.
e intento de asesinato.
that there's a solution for this epidemic.
que existe una solución para esa epidemia.
because I was a part of human trials.
he sido parte de pruebas en humanos.
to look at your belief system
tu sistema de creencias con voluntad,
un impacto negativo, no solo en ti,
negatively impact not just yourself,
las personas de tu entorno.
to be vulnerable with people
de mostrarte vulnerable ante las personas
but hold you accountable.
también se hacen responsables de ti.
that in order to share this,
que para compartir esto
con tantos ojos mirándome
of healing is on the horizon,
fase de curación se ve en el horizonte,
to share my story in full.
plenamente mi historia.
I was born into the ideal family dynamic:
en la dinámica de la familia ideal:
who earned a Purple Heart
que fue condecorado
marry, and begin his own brood.
se casó y empezó su propia camada.
una prisión de California
in the California prison system?
that big boys don't cry,
"los chicos grandes no lloran",
confidently other than anger,
que no fuera el enojo,
the performance on the field,
mejor seas en la pista,
about the rules off it.
por las reglas fuera de ella.
any one specific ingredient
un ingrediente en específico
que me enfermaban.
in Sacramento, California in the 1980s,
Sacramento, California en los años 1980,
I identified as having respect:
identifiqué que podía ser respetado:
his mom's car for a joyride and wreck it.
decidimos tomar el auto de su madre
the cost of a totaled vehicle,
el costo total del vehículo,
of household chores and no sports.
labores domésticas y nada de deportes.
no podría ser respetado,
equivalía a no tener poder,
alimentar mi enfermedad.
to transition from athlete to gangster
la decisión de pasar
y de manera muy fácil.
prepararon el escenario
for me to be well-suited
que se me viera en una posición de poder.
as in a position of power.
it did so in my mind.
on the fast track to prison life.
a una vida en prisión.
continué con mi historial
I continued my history
el lugar en el que iba a morir,
was the place that I would die.
in solitary confinement
nearly 30 times.
casi treinta veces.
how I lived or if I died.
cómo vivía o si iba a morir,
que me pasó en ese punto
that happened in my life to that point
a la prisión de New Folsom.
to join a group called Inside Circle.
a un grupo llamado "Dentro del Círculo".
referred to around the yard
de unirme a un grupo
the vision of a man named Patrick Nolan,
de un hombre llamado Patrick Nolan,
a cadena perpetua,
of being sick and tired
de estar harto y cansado
or Southern California,
in the wrong direction on a windy day.
en la dirección equivocada
sentados con otros hombres
walking down the street,
una mujer caminando en la calle
I'll just go along with the crowd.
simplemente voy con el montón.
en el vestidor de hombres.
and we question these things.
nos cuestionamos estas cosas.
I'm not thinking,
no estoy pensando,
de ser quien soy
that my life took a turn.
que mi vida tomó un giro.
who were seeking truth.
de hombres buscando la verdad.
I had manufactured to hide behind.
que había creado para esconderme.
that the jig was up.
en el que la fachada cayó.
por más fuerte que me creía,
as I believed I was,
who were seeking to serve and support
una habitación llena de hombres
that I graduated to a place within
que estaba listo para transformarse.
por parte de una niñera, en secreto.
at the hands of a babysitter a secret.
of my younger sister being harmed.
de lastimar a mi hermana menor;
mantenerla a salvo.
to keep her safe.
las semillas de una larga cadena
for a long career of hurting others,
mental o emocional.
where someone was going to get hurt,
donde alguien podría salir dañado,
de que amar me ponía en peligro,
that loving put me in harm's way.
about another person made me weak.
por otra persona me hacía débil,
equivalía a ser fuerte.
a shaky sense of self
un sentido inestable de sí mismo
de un aire falso de respeto.
resembles sitting in a fire.
a sentarse en una fogata.
que puede y va a romperte.
were invited into the open
fue invitada a salir a la luz
quería ser en la vida.
is who I wanted to be in life.
a un viaje a las profundidades de mi ser
que no solo se infectaron,
that not only festered
un espacio inseguro para los demás.
unsafe space for others.
a un exorcismo
of old, diseased ways of thinking,
que estaban dañadas y viejas,
to the fact of the power of the work.
un testimonio de los hechos
en junio del 2014
of former law-enforcement officials
un panel de exoficiales de la ley
my current threat level to society.
mi grado de amenaza para la sociedad.
since I was 14 years old
desde que tenía 14 años
ninguna forma de supervisión estatal,
woman named Holly,
impresionante llamada Holly
emotions in a safe way.
sus emociones de manera segura.
not have all the answers.
no tengo todas las respuestas.
que ser un hombre no es ser
some machismo caricature,
también llamadas defectos
usually defined as weaknesses
not just on myself,
no solo en mi mismo,
in my community.
varones en mi comunidad.
y el pensamiento grupal
to victimize others as well as themselves.
lastimando a otros y a sí mismos.
of how they want to show up in the world
cómo quieren mostrarse en el mundo,
to show up on their behalf.
se comporte en su nombre.
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Eldra Jackson III - EducatorEldra Jackson III works daily to connect to his most authentic self -- and his calling is to support others in doing the same.
Why you should listen
Eldra Jackson III is a spiritual warrior who lives a passion of "saving lives one circle at a time." After living most of his life devoid of emotions and coming face-to-face with the reality of dying behind bars, he came to a point of self-inquiry, seeking answers as to how his life had spiraled into a mass of destruction set upon self and others. From this point, the space was made to save his life.
Today, Jackson works to bring his spiritual medicine into the world while simultaneously guiding others to tap into their own internal salve and help identify wounds. Through his intensive awareness work, he is on a mission to show the world what's possible as each person does their own internal examination to begin the path towards emotional and psychic health. Learn more about him in the documentary The Work.
Eldra Jackson III | Speaker | TED.com