Priya Parker: 3 steps to turn everyday get-togethers into transformative gatherings
Prija Parker (Priya Parker): 3 koraka za pretvaranje svakodnevnih skupova u transformativna okupljanja
Priya Parker teaches people to gather better at home, at work, at school and in our communities. Full bio
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and stepfather's home --
i britansko, ateističko, budističko,
ponekad i u fazonu Novog doba,
to my father and stepmother's home
u dom svog oca i maćehe
koja je bila belačka, evangelistička,
to explain how I ended up
da objasni kako sam završila
in Charlottesville or Istanbul
u Šarlotsvilu, Istanbulu
to connect meaningfully,
da se ljudi smisleno povežu,
beautiful electricity in those rooms.
lepoj energiji u tim prostorijama.
gatherings like all of you --
skupovima kao i svi vi -
or a back-to-school picnic --
ili pikniku povodom povratka u školu -
conflict groups
visokog intenziteta
somebody's birthday party
nečija rođendanska žurka
between people,
na interakciju između ljudi,
focus on getting the things right --
fokusiraju da stvari budu kako treba -
between people largely to chance.
većim delom prepuste slučaju.
promeniti svakodnevna okupljanja
our everyday gatherings
by human connection,
na stvaranje smisla i povezivanje ljudi,
dozens of brave and unusual hosts --
desetine hrabrih i neobičnih domaćina -
a Cirque du Soleil choreographer,
koreografa Sirka du Solejl,
what creates meaningful
some of what I learned today
deo onoga što sam naučila
we skip too quickly to form.
i prebrzo prelazimo na formu.
and repetitive gatherings,
i jednoličnih okupljanja,
more meaningful everyday gatherings
smislenijih svakodnevnih okupljanja
disputable purpose.
was dreading her baby shower.
žurke pred dolazak svoje bebe.
on the baby" games
„zakači pelenu na bebu“
činila se čudno i beznačajno.
to address her fears
remember that guy? --
sećate se tog tipa? -
to invent a gathering based on that.
da osmisle okupljanje na osnovu toga.
six women gathered.
okupilo šest žena.
she was terrified --
od porođaja - bila je prestravljena -
she already carries --
koje već poseduje -
and help her in labor as well.
i pomoći joj i pri porođaju.
for each quality into a necklace
bi zakačile perlu na ogrlicu
in the delivery room.
family vows, and spoke them aloud,
porodične zavete, i čitali ih naglas,
da će njihov brak ostati bitan
their marriage central
from each of their family lines
od obe strane porodice,
sa ovom generacijom.
including men, for a dinner party.
što podrazumeva i muškarce, na večeru.
a favorite memory from their childhood
omiljenu uspomenu iz detinjstva
this is a lot for a baby shower,
za žurku povodom dolaska bebe,
or it's a little intimate.
should be specific to you.
treba da bude prilagođeno vama.
more meaningful everyday gatherings
smislenih svakodnevnih okupljanja
or religion at the dinner table.
politici ili religiji za vreme večere.
po tome što čuva harmoniju,
it preserves harmony,
of meaning, which is heat,
a to je uzbuđenje,
to cultivate good controversy
da neguju dobre polemike
is as threatened by unhealthy peace
jednako ugrožava nezdravi mir
with an architecture firm,
to continue to be an architecture firm
i dalje da budu arhitektonska firma
nešto najnovije, dizajnerska firma,
the hot new thing, a design firm,
the construction of spaces.
nakon konstrukcije prostora.
disagreement in the room,
stvarno neslaganje,
was actually speaking up publicly.
jer se niko nije javno izjašnjavao.
all the architects came back,
sve arhitekte su se vratile,
u jedan ugao da zastupa arhitekturu,
in one corner to represent architecture,
poput Dona Kinga
with counterarguments,
kontraargumentima,
the best possible argument
koji je najbolji mogući argument
was blocking their progress.
je blokirala njihov napredak.
physically choose a side
fizički odaberu stranu
to actually show where they stood,
koju stranu zastupaju,
tense Thanksgiving dinner?
napetoj večeri na Dan zahvalnosti?
negovanje dobrog uzbuđenja,
and asking for stories instead.
iznošenje mišljenja na jednu noć
related to the underlying conflict.
na postojeći konflikt.
from their life and experience
iz svog života i iskustva
has ever heard,
promenila mišljenje,
da se međusobno približe,
everyday gatherings,
smislenija svakodnevna okupljanja,
invitations coming with a set of rules.
da primećujem pozivnice
intersectional society,
intersekcijskom društvu,
unlike our own,
koji se razlikuju od naših,
to connect meaningfully.
da se povežemo na smislen način.
for a specific purpose.
samo jednoj određenoj svrsi.
assumptions of phone etiquette:
o kulturi korišćenja telefona:
u kome su isključivo neznanci,
of just strangers,
everybody to just listen
in the room --
kojim se poslom bavite.
u vezi sa tim o čemu žene,
to be mothers talk about when they gather,
pričaju kada se okupe,
you have to take a shot.
morate da popijete piće naiskap.
change and harmonize our behavior.
promenimo i uskladimo ponašanje.
uprkos različitosti,
by becoming a chameleon.
tako što bih postala kameleon.
and through conflict work
i radila na konfliktima,
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Priya Parker - Conflict mediator, authorPriya Parker teaches people to gather better at home, at work, at school and in our communities.
Why you should listen
Priya Parker is helping us take a deeper look at how anyone can create collective meaning in modern life, one gathering at a time. A group conflict mediator, she's spent 15 years helping leaders and communities have complicated conversations during times of heat and transition. Frustrated by dull and disappointing gatherings, Parker set out to rewrite the rule book for creating transformative group experiences.
Parker interviewed more than 100 gatherers and wove together their wisdom and her own experiences in her acclaimed book The Art of Gathering. She has worked on racial dialogues on American campuses and peace-building projects in India, Africa and the Arab world.
Priya Parker | Speaker | TED.com