TED2014
Ze Frank: Are you human?
Ze Frank: İnsansınız?
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Heç insan olub-olmadığınız haqqında düşünübsünüz? Ze Frankin hazırladığı suallaracavab verməklə bunun cavabını tapa bilərsiniz. Hazırsınızsa başlayaq...
Ze Frank - Humorist, web artist
Ze Frank rose to fame on a viral video -- in 2001! He has been making online comedy, web toys and massively shared experiences (like the addictive Young Me Now Me) ever since. Full bio
Ze Frank rose to fame on a viral video -- in 2001! He has been making online comedy, web toys and massively shared experiences (like the addictive Young Me Now Me) ever since. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:12
(Music) This is the human test,
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(Musiqi) Bu, insanlıq testidir,
00:15
a test to see if you are a human.
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sizin insan olub-olmadığınızı göstərəcək.
00:19
Please raise your hand if something applies to you.
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Zəhmət olmasa, sizə xitab edən sözlər
eşidəndə əlinizi qaldırın.
eşidəndə əlinizi qaldırın.
00:23
Are we agreed? Yes?
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Razılaşdıq? Hə?
00:27
Then let's begin.
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Onda başlayaq.
00:29
Have you ever eaten a booger
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Uşaqlıq dövrünüzü keçsəniz də
00:31
long past your childhood?
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fırtıqınızı yediyiniz olub?
00:34
(Laughter)
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(Gülüş)
00:36
It's okay, it's safe here.
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Problem yoxdur, sirrinizi açmaram.
00:40
Have you ever made a small, weird sound
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Olubmu ki, utandırıcı nəyisə xatırlayanda
00:43
when you remembered something embarrassing?
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astadan qəribə bir səs çıxarmısınız?
00:49
Have you ever purposely lowercased
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Olubmu ki, qəmgin yaxud məyus
00:51
the first letter of a text
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görünmək üçün qəsdən
00:53
in order to come across as sad or disappointed?
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mətnin ilk hərfini kiçiklə yazmısınız?
00:57
(Laughter)
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(Gülüş)
00:59
Okay.
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Yaxşı.
01:02
Have you ever ended a text with a period
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Heç hirsli olduğunuzu göstərmək üçün
01:05
as a sign of aggression? Okay. Period.
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mətni nöqtə ilə sonlandırmısınız? Hə. Nöqtə!
01:11
Have you ever laughed or smiled
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Olubmu ki, kimsə sizə mənasız
01:14
when someone said something shitty to you
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bir şey deyəndə güləsiniz,
01:16
and then spent the rest of the day
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və günün qalanını niyə belə etdiyinizi
01:18
wondering why you reacted that way?
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düşünərək keçirəsiniz?
01:22
Yes.
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Hə.
01:24
Have you ever seemed to lose your airplane ticket
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Check-indən sonra təyyarəyə
01:27
a thousand times as you walked
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minənə qədər dəfələrlə uçuş biletinizi
01:29
from the check-in to the gate?
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itirdiyinizi sandığınız necə, olubmu?
01:32
Yes.
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Hə.
01:34
Have you ever put on a pair of pants
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Heç şalvar geyəndə
01:37
and then much later realized that there was
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onun bir ayağının içində
01:38
a loose sock smushed up against your thigh?
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itirdiyiniz corabın qaldığını görmüsünüz?
01:41
(Laughter)
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(Gülüş)
01:43
Good.
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Əla.
01:46
Have you ever tried to guess
someone else's password
someone else's password
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Kiminsə şifrəsini tapmaq üçün
01:48
so many times that it locked their account?
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hesabı bloka salana qədər cəhd eləmisiniz?
01:53
Mmm.
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Hmm.
01:54
Have you ever had a nagging feeling that one day
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Nə vaxtsa hiyləgər olduğunuzu biləcəklər deyə
01:58
you will be discovered as a fraud?
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narahatlıq keçirmisiniz?
02:02
Yes, it's safe here.
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Bəli, qorxmayın, deyin.
02:05
Have you ever hoped that there was some ability
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Heç doğuşdan böyük istedada
sahib olduğunuzu fikirləşib,
sahib olduğunuzu fikirləşib,
02:08
you hadn't discovered yet
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lakin hələ üzə çıxarılmayan
02:10
that you were just naturally great at?
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qabiliyyətinizin olmasına ümid etmisiniz?
02:13
Mmm.
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Hmm.
02:15
Have you ever broken something in real life,
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Olubmu ki, real həyatda
02:18
and then found yourself looking
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nəyisə səhv edib “geri qayıt” düyməsini
02:20
for an "undo" button in real life?
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axtarmaq istəmisiniz?
02:25
Have you ever misplaced your TED badge
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Heç TED bəcinizi itirib,
02:27
and then immediately started imagining
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sonra da üç günlük Vankuver səyahətinin
02:29
what a three-day Vancouver
vacation might look like?
vacation might look like?
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necə olacağını düşünməyə başlamısınız?
02:35
Have you ever marveled
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Olubmu ki, adi hesab etdiyiniz
02:37
at how someone you thought was so ordinary
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bir şəxsin necə birdən-birə
02:40
could suddenly become so beautiful?
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gözəlləşdiyinə heyrətlənmisiniz?
02:45
Have you ever stared at your phone
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Heç telefona baxıb dişinizi ağardaraq
02:47
smiling like an idiot while texting with someone?
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mesajlaşmısınız?
02:52
Have you ever subsequently texted that person
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Sonra da yazışdığınız şəxsə
02:55
the phrase "I'm staring at the phone
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“telefona axmaq kimi dişimi ağardıb baxıram”
02:57
smiling like an idiot"?
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mesajı yazmısınız?
03:01
Have you ever been tempted to,
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Heç elə vaxt olub ki,
03:03
and then gave in to the temptation,
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bir nəfərin telefonuna baxmaq istəmisiniz
03:05
of looking through someone else's phone?
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və bu istəyi dayandıra bilməmisiniz?
03:09
Have you ever had a conversation with yourself
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Heç olub ki, özünüzlə danışmısınız
03:11
and then suddenly realized
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və qəflətən başa düşmüsünüz ki,
03:13
you're a real asshole to yourself?
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alçağın yekəsisiniz?
03:16
(Laughter)
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(Gülüş)
03:19
Has your phone ever run out of battery
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Heç olubmu ki, telefonun enerjisi
03:22
in the middle of an argument,
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söhbətin ortasında bitib və
03:24
and it sort of felt like the phone
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elə hiss eləmisiniz ki,
03:26
was breaking up with both of you?
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sanki telefon ikinizdən də bezib ayrılıb?
03:30
Have you ever thought
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Heç öz aranızda nəyisə həll etməyə
03:31
that working on an issue between you was futile
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çox səy göstərməyin nəticəsiz olduğunu,
03:34
because it should just be easier than this,
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çünki daha asan və ya təbii olaraq özbaşına
03:37
or this is supposed to happen just naturally?
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reallaşmalı olduğunu düşünmüsünüz?
03:42
Have you ever realized that very little, in the long run,
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Heç olubmu ki, çox az şeyin
03:45
just happens naturally?
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özbaşına reallaşdığını başa düşmüsünüz?
03:48
Have you ever woken up blissfully
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Olubmu ki, pozitiv oyanmısınız
03:51
and suddenly been flooded
by the awful remembrance
by the awful remembrance
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və qəflətən sizi tərk edən birinin
03:54
that someone had left you?
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dözülməz həsrətinə qapılmısınız?
03:57
Have you ever lost the ability to imagine a future
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Olubmu ki, həyatınızda olmayan insansız
04:00
without a person
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gələcəyi təsəvvür etmək
04:01
that no longer was in your life?
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qabiliyyətinizi itirmisiniz?
04:06
Have you ever looked back on that event
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Geri dönüb payızın hüznlü gülümsəməsi ilə
04:08
with the sad smile of autumn
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o hadisəyə nəzər salanda,
04:10
and the realization that futures will happen
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nə olur olsun,
04:13
regardless?
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gələcəyin olduğunu anlamısınız?
04:17
Congratulations.
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Təbriklər.
04:19
You have now completed the test.
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Testi tamamladınız.
04:21
You are all human.
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Hamınız insansınız.
04:24
(Applause)
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(Alqışlar)
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Ze Frank - Humorist, web artistZe Frank rose to fame on a viral video -- in 2001! He has been making online comedy, web toys and massively shared experiences (like the addictive Young Me Now Me) ever since.
Why you should listen
Ever since his "How to Dance Properly" viral video -- born as a party invite for 17 friends -- hit the Web in 2001, Ze Frank has been making people giggle, guffaw and gasp out loud whilst procrastinating at work. He defines, in many ways, the genre of online comedy, and continues to innovate madly on the form.
In 2006 he launched a year-long daily video blog called The Show with Ze Frank, which Slate.com called "the best sustained comedy run in the history of the Web." His rapid-fire delivery and absurd explorations in audience participation (like Earth Sandwich) has influenced a generation of digital native YouTubers. Perhap his most brilliant move: calling on fans to write the show for him. Using collaborative tools, online viewers collectively put words in his mouth (and props in his lap); he faithfully performed this wiki-comedy each week for his "Fabuloso Friday" show.
In 2008, along with Erik Kastner, Frank launched Colowars, the first massively multiplayer game on Twitter, which featured two months of sponsored online events and competitions. Recently he has worked with his audience to create a series of projects based on shared emotions such as pain, fear and the pang of nostalgia. Frank works as a consultant to range of industries on audience engagement and is a public speaker on the subject of the virtual life.
In 2012 he returned to the internet airwaves with "A Show." About which a MetaFilter commenter wrote:
If this were a cult, I would join.
If this were a religion, I would attend services.
If this were a band, I would not torrent the albums, but buy them, full price, from a local independent record store.
If this were a telethon, I would buy multiple tote bags.
Welcome back, Ze.
Ze Frank | Speaker | TED.com