TEDSalon NY2013
Bruce Feiler: Agile programming -- for your family
Brus Fajler (Bruce Feiler): Agilno programiranje - za vašu porodicu
Filmed:
Readability: 3.7
1,650,791 views
Brus Fajler ima radikalnu ideju - kako biste se izborili sa stresom modernog porodičnog života, probajte da radite agilno. Insipirisan agilnim programiranjem softvera, Fajler uvodi porodične navike koje podstiču fleksibilnost, tok ideja odozdo nagore, stalne povratne informacije i odgovornost. Postoji i jedna zanimljiva karakteristika - deca sama biraju svoje kazne.
Bruce Feiler - Writer
Bruce Feiler is the author of "The Secrets of Happy Families," and the writer/presenter of the PBS miniseries "Walking the Bible." Full bio
Bruce Feiler is the author of "The Secrets of Happy Families," and the writer/presenter of the PBS miniseries "Walking the Bible." Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
Evo dobre vesti vezane za porodicu.
00:16
So here's the good news about families.
0
732
2887
U proteklih 50 godina
prisustvovali smo revoluciji toga
prisustvovali smo revoluciji toga
00:19
The last 50 years have seen a revolution
1
3619
2249
00:21
in what it means to be a family.
2
5868
2056
šta znači biti porodica.
Postoje pastorske porodice,
porodice sa usvojenom decom,
porodice sa usvojenom decom,
00:23
We have blended families, adopted families,
3
7924
2295
00:26
we have nuclear families living in separate houses
4
10219
2305
nuklearne porodice koje žive
u odvojenim kućama
u odvojenim kućama
00:28
and divorced families living in the same house.
5
12524
2879
i razvedene porodice
koje žive u istoj kući.
koje žive u istoj kući.
00:31
But through it all, the family has grown stronger.
6
15403
3059
Ali uprkos svemu ovome,
porodica je postala jača.
porodica je postala jača.
00:34
Eight in 10 say the family they have today
7
18462
2549
Osmoro od desetoro ljudi kažu
da je porodica koju imaju danas
da je porodica koju imaju danas
00:36
is as strong or stronger than the family they grew up in.
8
21011
4537
isto toliko jaka ili još jača
od porodice u kojoj su odrasli.
od porodice u kojoj su odrasli.
00:41
Now, here's the bad news.
9
25548
1984
A evo i loših vesti.
00:43
Nearly everyone is completely overwhelmed
10
27532
2398
Skoro svi su u potpunosti savladani
00:45
by the chaos of family life.
11
29930
2311
haosom koji vlada
u porodičnom životu.
u porodičnom životu.
00:48
Every parent I know, myself included,
12
32241
2058
Svi roditelji koje znam,
uključujući i mene,
uključujući i mene,
00:50
feels like we're constantly playing defense.
13
34299
2596
osećaju se kao da konstantno
igraju u odbrani.
igraju u odbrani.
00:52
Just when our kids stop teething, they start having tantrums.
14
36895
3053
Čim našoj deci prestanu da rastu zubi,
javljaju se nastupi besa.
javljaju se nastupi besa.
Čim im više ne treba
naša pomoć pri kupanju,
naša pomoć pri kupanju,
00:55
Just when they stop needing our help taking a bath,
15
39948
2040
00:57
they need our help dealing with cyberstalking or bullying.
16
41988
3200
potrebna im je pomoć da se izbore
sa sajber-uhođenjem ili maltretiranjem.
sa sajber-uhođenjem ili maltretiranjem.
01:01
And here's the worst news of all.
17
45188
2690
A evo najgore vesti od svih.
01:03
Our children sense we're out of control.
18
47878
2926
Naša deca su svesna
da gubimo kontrolu.
da gubimo kontrolu.
01:06
Ellen Galinsky of the Families and Work Institute
19
50804
3065
Elen Galinski sa
Instituta za porodicu i rad
Instituta za porodicu i rad
01:09
asked 1,000 children, "If you were granted
20
53869
2279
pitala je 1000 dece: "Da imate
01:12
one wish about your parents, what would it be?"
21
56148
3433
jednu želju u vezi sa vašim roditeljima,
šta bi ona bila?"
šta bi ona bila?"
01:15
The parents predicted the kids would say,
22
59581
2318
Roditelji su pretpostavili
da će deca reći
da će deca reći
01:17
spending more time with them.
23
61899
2866
da je to da provode
više vremena s njima.
više vremena s njima.
01:20
They were wrong. The kids' number one wish?
24
64765
2845
Pogrešili su.
Šta je dečija želja broj jedan?
Šta je dečija želja broj jedan?
01:23
That their parents be less tired and less stressed.
25
67610
4346
Da im roditelji budu odmorniji
i pod manjim stresom.
i pod manjim stresom.
01:27
So how can we change this dynamic?
26
71956
2101
Kako možemo da
promenimo ovu dinamiku?
promenimo ovu dinamiku?
01:29
Are there concrete things we can do to reduce stress,
27
74057
3218
Da li postoje neke određene stvari
kojima možemo da umanjimo stres
kojima možemo da umanjimo stres
01:33
draw our family closer,
28
77275
1866
i približimo naše porodice
01:35
and generally prepare our children to enter the world?
29
79141
4856
i uopšteno spremimo našu decu
za ulazak u svet?
za ulazak u svet?
01:39
I spent the last few years trying to answer that question,
30
83997
3196
Proveo sam proteklih nekoliko godina
pokušavajući da nađem odgovor,
pokušavajući da nađem odgovor,
01:43
traveling around, meeting families, talking to scholars,
31
87193
3025
putovao sam, upoznavao porodice,
razgovarao sa naučnicima,
razgovarao sa naučnicima,
01:46
experts ranging from elite peace negotiators
32
90218
3058
stručnjacima,
od elitnih mirovnih pregovarača
od elitnih mirovnih pregovarača
01:49
to Warren Buffett's bankers to the Green Berets.
33
93276
4047
preko uspešnih bankara,
do američkih vojnika.
do američkih vojnika.
01:53
I was trying to figure out, what do happy families do right
34
97323
3366
Pokušavao sam da shvatim
šta srećne porodice rade drugačije
šta srećne porodice rade drugačije
01:56
and what can I learn from them to make my family happier?
35
100689
4986
i šta mogu da naučim od njih
kako bi moja porodica bila srećnija.
kako bi moja porodica bila srećnija.
Želim da vam kažem
nešto o jednoj porodici
nešto o jednoj porodici
02:01
I want to tell you about one family that I met,
36
105675
1865
02:03
and why I think they offer clues.
37
107540
2624
koju sam sreo i zašto mislim
da nam ona nudi smernice.
da nam ona nudi smernice.
02:06
At 7 p.m. on a Sunday in Hidden Springs, Idaho,
38
110164
2987
U 7 časova popodne nedeljom
u Hiden Springsu, u Ajdahu,
u Hiden Springsu, u Ajdahu,
02:09
where the six members of the Starr family are sitting down
39
113151
2308
šestoro članova porodice Star zasedaju
02:11
to the highlight of their week: the family meeting.
40
115459
3238
za vrhunac njihove nedelje:
porodični sastanak.
porodični sastanak.
02:14
The Starrs are a regular American family
41
118697
2225
Porodica Star je prosečna
američka porodica
američka porodica
02:16
with their share of regular American family problems.
42
120922
2751
sa prosečnim problemima
američke porodice.
američke porodice.
02:19
David is a software engineer. Eleanor takes care
43
123673
2792
Dejvid je softverski inženjer.
Elenor brine
Elenor brine
02:22
of their four children, ages 10 to 15.
44
126465
2792
o njihovih četvoro dece,
starosti između 10 i 15 godina.
starosti između 10 i 15 godina.
02:25
One of those kids tutors math on the far side of town.
45
129257
3024
Jedno od te dece ide na matematiku
na suprotnom delu grada.
na suprotnom delu grada.
02:28
One has lacrosse on the near side of town.
46
132281
2505
Jedno trenira lakros u blizini.
02:30
One has Asperger syndrome. One has ADHD.
47
134786
3511
Jedno pati od Aspergerovog sindroma.
Jedno ima hiperkinetički poremećaj.
Jedno ima hiperkinetički poremećaj.
02:34
"We were living in complete chaos," Eleanor said.
48
138297
3328
"Živeli smo u potpunom haosu,"
rekla je Elenor.
rekla je Elenor.
02:37
What the Starrs did next, though, was surprising.
49
141625
3344
Sledeće što je porodica Star uradila,
ipak, bilo je iznenađujuće.
ipak, bilo je iznenađujuće.
02:40
Instead of turning to friends or relatives,
50
144969
2768
Umesto da su se obratili
prijateljima ili rođacima,
prijateljima ili rođacima,
02:43
they looked to David's workplace.
51
147737
2712
oni su pogledali Dejvidovo radno mesto.
02:46
They turned to a cutting-edge program called agile development
52
150449
2778
Osvrnuli su se na inovativan program
- agilni razvoj,
- agilni razvoj,
02:49
that was just spreading from manufacturers in Japan
53
153227
3070
koji se u tom trenutku širio
od proizvođača u Japanu
od proizvođača u Japanu
02:52
to startups in Silicon Valley.
54
156297
2976
do startap kompanija
u Silikonskoj dolini.
u Silikonskoj dolini.
02:55
In agile, workers are organized into small groups
55
159273
2868
U agilnom okruženju,
radnici su podeljeni u male grupe
radnici su podeljeni u male grupe
02:58
and do things in very short spans of time.
56
162141
2686
i rade stvari u veoma kratkom
vremenskom roku.
vremenskom roku.
03:00
So instead of having executives issue grand proclamations,
57
164827
2942
Umesto da direktori izdaju
velike proglase,
velike proglase,
03:03
the team in effect manages itself.
58
167769
3200
tim u stvari upravlja samim sobom.
Postoji stalna povratna informacija.
Dnevne sesije o najnovijim informacijama.
Dnevne sesije o najnovijim informacijama.
03:06
You have constant feedback. You have daily update sessions.
59
170969
2631
03:09
You have weekly reviews. You're constantly changing.
60
173600
3617
Postoje nedeljni pregledi.
Stalno se menjate.
Stalno se menjate.
03:13
David said when they brought this system into their home,
61
177217
3200
Dejvid je rekao da se kada je uveo
ovaj sistem u njihov dom,
ovaj sistem u njihov dom,
03:16
the family meetings in particular increased communication,
62
180417
3416
posebno porodične sastanke,
komunikacija poboljšala,
komunikacija poboljšala,
03:19
decreased stress, and made everybody
63
183833
2376
stres smanjio i svako je bio
03:22
happier to be part of the family team.
64
186209
3104
srećniji što je deo porodičnog tima.
Kada smo moja supruga i ja usvojili
ove porodične sastanke i druge tehnike
ove porodične sastanke i druge tehnike
03:25
When my wife and I adopted these family meetings and other techniques
65
189313
2983
03:28
into the lives of our then-five-year-old twin daughters,
66
192296
3513
u živote naših tada
petogodišnjih bliznakinja,
petogodišnjih bliznakinja,
03:31
it was the biggest single change we made since our daughters were born.
67
195809
4064
to je bila najveća promena
od kada su naše ćerke rođene.
od kada su naše ćerke rođene.
03:35
And these meetings had this effect
68
199873
2189
Ovi sastanci su imali toliki efekat,
03:37
while taking under 20 minutes.
69
202062
2499
a trajali su manje od 20 minuta.
Šta je onda agilno,
i zašto ono može da pomogne
i zašto ono može da pomogne
03:40
So what is Agile, and why can it help
70
204561
2152
03:42
with something that seems so different, like families?
71
206713
2728
s nečim što deluje toliko različito,
kao što su porodice?
kao što su porodice?
03:45
In 1983, Jeff Sutherland was a technologist
72
209441
2349
1983. Džef Saderlend bio je tehnolog
03:47
at a financial firm in New England.
73
211790
2317
u finansijskoj firmi u Novoj Engleskoj.
Bio je veoma frustriran načinom
na koji se vršio dizajn softvera.
na koji se vršio dizajn softvera.
03:50
He was very frustrated with how software got designed.
74
214107
3018
03:53
Companies followed the waterfall method, right,
75
217125
2752
Kompanije su pratile metodu vodopada,
03:55
in which executives issued orders that slowly trickled down
76
219877
3058
u kojoj su nadređeni izdavali naređenja,
koja su polako curela
koja su polako curela
03:58
to programmers below,
77
222935
1619
ka programerima pod njima
04:00
and no one had ever consulted the programmers.
78
224554
2648
i niko se nikada nije
konsultovao sa programerima.
konsultovao sa programerima.
04:03
Eighty-three percent of projects failed.
79
227202
2579
83 procenta projekata
je bilo neuspešno.
je bilo neuspešno.
04:05
They were too bloated or too out of date
80
229781
2397
Bili su preobimni ili su previše kasnili
04:08
by the time they were done.
81
232178
2682
do vremena kada bi ih dovršili.
04:10
Sutherland wanted to create a system where
82
234860
2444
Saderlend je želeo da stvori sistem u kome
04:13
ideas didn't just percolate down but could percolate up from the bottom
83
237304
4178
ideje neće teći samo ka dole,
nego će se i uspinjati na gore
nego će se i uspinjati na gore
04:17
and be adjusted in real time.
84
241482
2545
i biti prilagođavane u realnom vremenu.
04:19
He read 30 years of Harvard Business Review
85
244027
3063
Iščitao je 30 godina
Harvardskog poslovnog časopisa
Harvardskog poslovnog časopisa
04:22
before stumbling upon an article in 1986
86
247090
2792
kada je naleteo na članak iz 1986.
04:25
called "The New New Product Development Game."
87
249882
3079
pod nazivom:
"Nova nova igra razvoja proizvoda".
"Nova nova igra razvoja proizvoda".
U njemu je stajalo da se
tempo poslovanja ubrzava -
tempo poslovanja ubrzava -
04:28
It said that the pace of business was quickening --
88
252961
2251
04:31
and by the way, this was in 1986 --
89
255212
2129
imajte na umu, ovo je bilo 1986. -
04:33
and the most successful companies were flexible.
90
257341
3965
i da su najuspešnije kompanije
fleksibilne.
fleksibilne.
Tojota i Kenon su izdvojene, a njihovi
04:37
It highlighted Toyota and Canon
91
261306
1784
04:38
and likened their adaptable, tight-knit teams to rugby scrums.
92
263090
4304
usko povezani, prilagodljivi timovi
poređeni su sa gomilom u ragbiju.
poređeni su sa gomilom u ragbiju.
Kao što mi je Saderlend rekao,
stigli smo do tog članka
stigli smo do tog članka
04:43
As Sutherland told me, we got to that article,
93
267394
2365
04:45
and said, "That's it."
94
269759
2165
i rekli: "To je to."
04:47
In Sutherland's system, companies don't use
95
271924
2717
Prema Saderlendovom sistemu,
kompanije nemaju
kompanije nemaju
04:50
large, massive projects that take two years.
96
274641
3001
velike, masivne projekte
koji traju po dve godine.
koji traju po dve godine.
04:53
They do things in small chunks.
97
277642
1228
One to rade rasparčano.
04:54
Nothing takes longer than two weeks.
98
278870
2449
Ništa ne traje duže od dve nedelje.
Umesto da kažemo:
"Vi momci idite u ono skladište
"Vi momci idite u ono skladište
04:57
So instead of saying, "You guys go off into that bunker
99
281319
2066
04:59
and come back with a cell phone or a social network,"
100
283385
3001
i dođite nam sa telefonom
ili društvenom mrežom,"
ili društvenom mrežom,"
05:02
you say, "You go off and come up with one element,
101
286386
2432
mi govorimo:
"Idite i smislite jedan element
"Idite i smislite jedan element
i donesite nam ga. Hajde da popričamo
o njemu. Da ga prilagodimo."
o njemu. Da ga prilagodimo."
05:04
then bring it back. Let's talk about it. Let's adapt."
102
288818
2520
05:07
You succeed or fail quickly.
103
291338
3608
Uspeh ili neuspeh se dešava brzo.
05:10
Today, agile is used in a hundred countries,
104
294946
3168
Danas, agilni pristup
koristi se u stotinu država
koristi se u stotinu država
05:14
and it's sweeping into management suites.
105
298114
2938
i zalazi i u modele upravljanja.
05:16
Inevitably, people began taking some of these techniques
106
301052
2510
Neizbežno, ljudi počinju
da preuzimaju neke
da preuzimaju neke
od ovih tehnika i primenjuju ih
na svoje porodice.
na svoje porodice.
05:19
and applying it to their families.
107
303562
2275
05:21
You had blogs pop up, and some manuals were written.
108
305837
2573
Pojavilo se nekoliko blogova
i pisali su uputstva.
i pisali su uputstva.
05:24
Even the Sutherlands told me that they had
109
308410
1896
Čak mi je i Saderlend rekao da su oni
05:26
an Agile Thanksgiving,
110
310306
1510
imali agilan Dan zahvalnosti,
05:27
where you had one group of people working on the food,
111
311816
2511
gde je jedna grupa ljudi spremala hranu,
05:30
one setting the table, and one greeting visitors at the door.
112
314327
3331
jedna postavljala sto,
a jedna na vratima pozdravljala goste.
a jedna na vratima pozdravljala goste.
05:33
Sutherland said it was the best Thanksgiving ever.
113
317658
3520
Saderlend je rekao da je to
bio najbolji Dan zahvalnosti ikada.
bio najbolji Dan zahvalnosti ikada.
Hajde da uzmemo jedan problem
sa kojim se porodice suočavaju,
sa kojim se porodice suočavaju,
05:37
So let's take one problem that families face,
114
321178
2680
05:39
crazy mornings, and talk about how agile can help.
115
323858
3017
užurbana jutra, i hajde da vidimo
kako agilnost može da pomogne.
kako agilnost može da pomogne.
05:42
A key plank is accountability,
116
326875
2166
Ključan element je obaveštenost i zato
05:44
so teams use information radiators,
117
329041
1799
timovi koriste odašiljače informacija,
05:46
these large boards in which everybody is accountable.
118
330840
3763
ogromne table na kojima
se nalaze svi članovi.
se nalaze svi članovi.
Porodica Star je ovo
prilagodila svom domu
prilagodila svom domu
05:50
So the Starrs, in adapting this to their home,
119
334603
1936
stvaranjem jutarnjeg spiska obaveza
05:52
created a morning checklist
120
336539
1661
05:54
in which each child is expected to tick off chores.
121
338200
3588
na kome svako dete obeležava
završene poslove.
završene poslove.
Onog jutra kada sam ih posetio,
Elenor je sišla niz stepenice,
Elenor je sišla niz stepenice,
05:57
So on the morning I visited, Eleanor came downstairs,
122
341788
2380
06:00
poured herself a cup of coffee, sat in a reclining chair,
123
344168
2710
nasula sebi šolju kafe,
sela na stolicu sa naslonom
sela na stolicu sa naslonom
06:02
and she sat there,
124
346878
1508
i dok je sedela tamo
06:04
kind of amiably talking to each of her children
125
348386
2998
ljubazno je razgovarala
sa svakim detetom
sa svakim detetom
kako su se jedno po jedno
spuštali sa sprata,
spuštali sa sprata,
06:07
as one after the other they came downstairs,
126
351384
1991
06:09
checked the list, made themselves breakfast,
127
353375
2369
označavali listu
i spremali sebi doručak,
i spremali sebi doručak,
06:11
checked the list again, put the dishes in the dishwasher,
128
355744
2783
ponovo označavali listu,
stavili posuđe u mašinu,
stavili posuđe u mašinu,
vratili se na listu, nahranili ljubimce
ili obavili neku drugu obavezu,
ili obavili neku drugu obavezu,
06:14
rechecked the list, fed the pets or whatever chores they had,
129
358527
3120
06:17
checked the list once more, gathered their belongings,
130
361647
2424
joj jednom obeležili listu,
skupili stvari
skupili stvari
06:19
and made their way to the bus.
131
364071
2637
i krenuli na autobus.
06:22
It was one of the most astonishing family dynamics I have ever seen.
132
366708
4077
Bila je to jedna od najzapanjujućih
porodičnih dinamika koje sam video.
porodičnih dinamika koje sam video.
06:26
And when I strenuously objected this would never work in our house,
133
370785
3142
I kada sam uporno tvrdio
da ovo nikad ne bi funkcionisalo kod nas,
da ovo nikad ne bi funkcionisalo kod nas,
06:29
our kids needed way too much monitoring,
134
373927
2183
da je našoj deci potrebno
mnogo više nadgledanja,
mnogo više nadgledanja,
06:32
Eleanor looked at me.
135
376110
1300
Elenor me je pogledala.
06:33
"That's what I thought," she said.
136
377410
1168
"To sam i ja mislila".
06:34
"I told David, 'keep your work out of my kitchen.'
137
378578
2320
"Rekla sam Dejvidu: 'Drži posao
podalje od moje kuhinje.'
podalje od moje kuhinje.'
06:36
But I was wrong."
138
380898
1621
Ali sam pogrešila."
06:38
So I turned to David: "So why does it work?"
139
382519
2104
Okrenuo sam se ka Dejvidu:
"Zašto ovo radi?"
"Zašto ovo radi?"
06:40
He said, "You can't underestimate the power of doing this."
140
384623
2936
Rekao je: "Ne smemo potcenjivati
snagu ovoga."
snagu ovoga."
06:43
And he made a checkmark.
141
387559
1534
Otkačio je stavku na listi.
06:44
He said, "In the workplace, adults love it.
142
389093
2136
Rekao je: "Odrasli vole ovo da rade
na radnom mestu.
na radnom mestu.
06:47
With kids, it's heaven."
143
391229
2476
Sa decom, ovo je raj."
06:49
The week we introduced a morning checklist into our house,
144
393705
2837
One nedelje kada smo uveli
jutarnju listu u naš dom,
jutarnju listu u naš dom,
06:52
it cut parental screaming in half. (Laughter)
145
396542
4147
roditeljska vika se prepolovila.
(Smeh)
(Smeh)
Ali se stvarna promena nije desila
dok nismo uveli porodične sastanke.
dok nismo uveli porodične sastanke.
06:56
But the real change didn't come until we had these family meetings.
146
400689
3085
06:59
So following the agile model, we ask three questions:
147
403774
3321
Prateći agilni model,
postavljamo tri pitanja:
postavljamo tri pitanja:
Šta je funkcionisalo ove nedelje
u našoj porodici,
u našoj porodici,
07:02
What worked well in our family this week,
148
407095
1922
07:04
what didn't work well, and what will we agree to work on in the week ahead?
149
409017
4160
šta nije funkcionisalo i na čemu
se slažemo da ćemo raditi sledeće nedelje?
se slažemo da ćemo raditi sledeće nedelje?
07:09
Everyone throws out suggestions
150
413177
1587
Svako iznosi predloge
07:10
and then we pick two to focus on.
151
414764
2732
i biramo dva na koja se usredređujemo.
07:13
And suddenly the most amazing things started coming out of our daughters' mouths.
152
417496
3902
I iznenada, naše devojčice su počele
da govore najneverovatnije stvari.
da govore najneverovatnije stvari.
07:17
What worked well this week?
153
421398
2120
Šta je funkcionisalo ove nedelje?
07:19
Getting over our fear of riding bikes. Making our beds.
154
423518
2920
Prevazišli smo strah od voženja bicikala.
Nameštanja kreveta.
Nameštanja kreveta.
07:22
What didn't work well? Our math sheets,
155
426438
2912
Šta nije funkcionisalo?
Zadaci iz matematike,
Zadaci iz matematike,
07:25
or greeting visitors at the door.
156
429350
3187
pozdravljanje gostiju na vratima.
07:28
Like a lot of parents, our kids are something like Bermuda Triangles.
157
432537
3428
Kao i u većini porodica, naša deca su
nešto poput Bermudskog trougla.
nešto poput Bermudskog trougla.
07:31
Like, thoughts and ideas go in, but none ever comes out,
158
435965
2545
Misli i ideje ulaze, ali
nikad nijedna ne izlazi.
nikad nijedna ne izlazi.
07:34
I mean at least not that are revealing.
159
438510
1534
Barem ne neke od značaja.
07:35
This gave us access suddenly to their innermost thoughts.
160
440044
3763
Ovo nam je odjednom pružilo pristup
njihovim najskrivenijim mislima.
njihovim najskrivenijim mislima.
Ali nas je najviše iznenadilo kada smo se
07:39
But the most surprising part was when we turned to,
161
443807
1787
07:41
what are we going to work on in the week ahead?
162
445594
2654
osvrnuli na to šta ćemo da radimo
naredne nedelje.
naredne nedelje.
07:44
You know, the key idea of agile is that
163
448248
2017
Znate, ključ agilnosti je da timovi
07:46
teams essentially manage themselves,
164
450265
1805
suštinski upravljaju samim sobom
07:47
and it works in software and it turns out that it works with kids.
165
452070
3344
i to radi u razvoju softvera
i ispostavilo se da radi i sa decom.
i ispostavilo se da radi i sa decom.
07:51
Our kids love this process.
166
455414
1691
Naša deca vole ovaj proces.
07:53
So they would come up with all these ideas.
167
457105
2189
Dolazili bi nam sa mnogim idejama.
07:55
You know, greet five visitors at the door this week,
168
459294
2046
Pozdraviti pet gostiju
na vratima ove nedelje,
na vratima ove nedelje,
07:57
get an extra 10 minutes of reading before bed.
169
461340
2563
čitati 10 minuta više pre spavanja.
07:59
Kick someone, lose desserts for a month.
170
463903
2812
Mesec dana bez deserta ako šutnu nekoga.
Ispostavilo se, inače,
da su naša deca mali Staljini.
da su naša deca mali Staljini.
08:02
It turns out, by the way, our girls are little Stalins.
171
466715
2167
08:04
We constantly have to kind of dial them back.
172
468882
2945
Stalno smo morali da ih usmeravamo.
08:07
Now look, naturally there's a gap between
173
471827
1992
Vidite, prirodno je da postoji jaz između
njihovog ponašanja na ovim sastancima
i ponašanja tokom ostatka sedmice,
i ponašanja tokom ostatka sedmice,
08:09
their kind of conduct in these meetings and their behavior the rest of the week,
174
473819
3368
08:13
but the truth is it didn't really bother us.
175
477187
2114
ali to nama nije zaista smetalo.
Imali smo osećaj kao da
postavljamo neke podzemne veze
postavljamo neke podzemne veze
08:15
It felt like we were kind of laying these underground cables
176
479301
2350
08:17
that wouldn't light up their world for many years to come.
177
481651
3330
koje neće osvetljavati njihov svet
još godinama.
još godinama.
08:20
Three years later -- our girls are almost eight now --
178
484981
2430
3 godine kasnije - naše devojčice
imaju skoro 8 godina -
imaju skoro 8 godina -
08:23
We're still holding these meetings.
179
487411
2437
još uvek održavamo ove sastanke.
08:25
My wife counts them among her most treasured moments as a mom.
180
489848
4732
Moja supruga ih ubraja među
najdraže trenutke majčinstva.
najdraže trenutke majčinstva.
08:30
So what did we learn?
181
494580
2383
Šta smo naučili?
08:32
The word "agile" entered the lexicon in 2001
182
496963
2501
Reč "agilno" ušla je u rečnik 2001.
08:35
when Jeff Sutherland and a group of designers
183
499464
2200
kada su se Džef Saderlend
i grupa dizajnera
i grupa dizajnera
08:37
met in Utah and wrote a 12-point Agile Manifesto.
184
501664
4132
susreli u Juti i sastavili
Manifesto agila u 12 tačaka.
Manifesto agila u 12 tačaka.
08:41
I think the time is right for an Agile Family Manifesto.
185
505796
3531
Mislim da je stiglo vreme
za Manifesto porodičnog agila.
za Manifesto porodičnog agila.
Preuzeo sam neke od ideja od Starovih
i drugih porodica sa kojima sam se susreo.
i drugih porodica sa kojima sam se susreo.
08:45
I've taken some ideas from the Starrs and from many other families I met.
186
509327
3375
08:48
I'm proposing three planks.
187
512702
2759
Predlažem tri osnovna načela.
08:51
Plank number one: Adapt all the time.
188
515461
3568
Načelo broj jedan:
Stalno se prilagođavajte.
Stalno se prilagođavajte.
08:54
When I became a parent, I figured, you know what?
189
519029
1786
Kada sam postao roditelj, mislio sam,
znate šta?
znate šta?
08:56
We'll set a few rules and we'll stick to them.
190
520815
3099
Postavićemo nekoliko pravila
i držaćemo ih se.
i držaćemo ih se.
08:59
That assumes, as parents, we can anticipate every problem that's going to arise.
191
523914
3649
To pretpostavlja, da mi, kao roditelji,
predviđamo svaki problem koji će naići.
predviđamo svaki problem koji će naići.
09:03
We can't. What's great about the agile system
192
527563
3434
To je nemoguće. Ono što je sjajno
u agilnom sistemu je
u agilnom sistemu je
09:06
is you build in a system of change
193
530997
1866
što se on gradi tokom promena
tako da možete da reagujete
na ono što se dešava u realnom vremenu.
na ono što se dešava u realnom vremenu.
09:08
so that you can react to what's happening to you in real time.
194
532863
3031
09:11
It's like they say in the Internet world:
195
535894
1444
Kao što kažu na internetu:
09:13
if you're doing the same thing today you were doing six months ago,
196
537338
2744
ako danas radite istu stvar
koju ste radili pre šest meseci,
koju ste radili pre šest meseci,
09:15
you're doing the wrong thing.
197
540082
1658
ne radite pravu stvar.
09:17
Parents can learn a lot from that.
198
541740
2908
Roditelji mogu mnogo da nauče iz toga.
09:20
But to me, "adapt all the time" means something deeper, too.
199
544648
3312
Ali za mene "stalno prilagođavanje"
znači i nešto više.
znači i nešto više.
09:23
We have to break parents out of this straitjacket
200
547960
2376
Moramo da oslobodimo roditelje
od sulude ideje
od sulude ideje
da su jedine ideje koje možemo
da pokušamo kod kuće
da pokušamo kod kuće
09:26
that the only ideas we can try at home
201
550336
2337
09:28
are ones that come from shrinks or self-help gurus
202
552673
3367
one koje dolaze od psihologa
ili gurua za samopomoć
ili gurua za samopomoć
09:31
or other family experts.
203
556040
2320
ili drugih porodičnih stručnjaka.
09:34
The truth is, their ideas are stale,
204
558360
2272
Njihove ideje su zastarele,
09:36
whereas in all these other worlds there are these new ideas
205
560632
2296
dok se svuda oko nas nalaze nove ideje
09:38
to make groups and teams work effectively.
206
562928
3325
pomoću kojih grupe i timovi
uspešno sarađuju.
uspešno sarađuju.
Uzmimo nekoliko primera.
09:42
Let's just take a few examples.
207
566253
1135
09:43
Let's take the biggest issue of all: family dinner.
208
567388
3220
Uzmimo najveći problem:
porodični ručak.
porodični ručak.
09:46
Everybody knows that having family dinner
209
570608
2057
Svi znaju da su porodični ručkovi
09:48
with your children is good for the kids.
210
572665
2328
dobri za decu.
09:50
But for so many of us, it doesn't work in our lives.
211
574993
2959
Ali za mnoge od nas to nije izvodljivo.
Upoznao sam poznatog kuvara
u Nju Orleansu koji je rekao:
u Nju Orleansu koji je rekao:
09:53
I met a celebrity chef in New Orleans who said,
212
577952
2272
09:56
"No problem, I'll just time-shift family dinner.
213
580224
2379
"Nema problema,
pomeriću porodični ručak.
pomeriću porodični ručak.
09:58
I'm not home, can't make family dinner?
214
582603
2136
Nisam kod kuće i ne mogu da kuvam?
10:00
We'll have family breakfast. We'll meet for a bedtime snack.
215
584739
2992
Imaćemo porodični doručak.
Sastaćemo se za užinu pred spavanje.
Sastaćemo se za užinu pred spavanje.
10:03
We'll make Sunday meals more important."
216
587731
2866
Nedeljni ručak će biti važniji."
10:06
And the truth is, recent research backs him up.
217
590597
3550
Skorašnja istraživanja
podupiru njegove reči.
podupiru njegove reči.
10:10
It turns out there's only 10 minutes of productive time
218
594147
2912
Ispostavilo se da postoji samo
10 minuta produktivnog vremena
10 minuta produktivnog vremena
10:12
in any family meal.
219
597059
1837
prilikom bilo kog
porodičnog obroka.
porodičnog obroka.
10:14
The rest of it's taken up with "take your elbows off the table" and "pass the ketchup."
220
598896
3918
Ostatak vremena oduzima
"pomeri laktove sa stola" i "dodaj kečap".
"pomeri laktove sa stola" i "dodaj kečap".
10:18
You can take that 10 minutes and move it
221
602814
2037
Tih 10 minuta može se pomeriti
10:20
to any part of the day and have the same benefit.
222
604851
3280
na bilo koji deo dana
i imaće isti doprinos.
i imaće isti doprinos.
10:24
So time-shift family dinner. That's adaptability.
223
608131
2825
Pomeranje porodičnog ručka.
To je prilagođavanje.
To je prilagođavanje.
10:26
An environmental psychologist told me,
224
610956
2290
Psiholog okoline mi je rekao:
10:29
"If you're sitting in a hard chair on a rigid surface,
225
613246
3335
"Ako sedite na tvrdoj stolici
na krutoj površini
na krutoj površini
10:32
you'll be more rigid.
226
616581
1450
i vi ćete biti kruti."
10:33
If you're sitting on a cushioned chair, you'll be more open."
227
618031
3903
Ako sedite na mekoj stolici,
bićete otvoreniji."
bićete otvoreniji."
Rekla mi je: "Kada vaspitavate decu,
10:37
She told me, "When you're discipling your children,
228
621934
1607
sedite u stolici sa ravnim naslonom
koja ima jastuk.
koja ima jastuk.
10:39
sit in an upright chair with a cushioned surface.
229
623541
2398
10:41
The conversation will go better."
230
625939
2554
Razgovor će bolje teći."
10:44
My wife and I actually moved where we sit for difficult conversations
231
628493
3617
Supruga i ja smo promenili mesto
gde vodimo teške razgovore
gde vodimo teške razgovore
10:48
because I was sitting above in the power position.
232
632110
2820
jer sam ja sedeo više, na mestu moći.
10:50
So move where you sit. That's adaptability.
233
634930
3040
Promenite mesto na kome sedite.
To je prilagođavanje.
To je prilagođavanje.
10:53
The point is there are all these new ideas out there.
234
637970
3354
Suština je da postoje sve ove nove ideje.
10:57
We've got to hook them up with parents.
235
641324
2387
Moramo ih povezati sa roditeljstvom.
10:59
So plank number one: Adapt all the time.
236
643711
2427
Dakle, prvo načelo:
Stalno se prilagođavajte.
Stalno se prilagođavajte.
11:02
Be flexible, be open-minded, let the best ideas win.
237
646138
4440
Budite fleksibilni, otvoreni,
dozvolite da pobedi najbolja ideja.
dozvolite da pobedi najbolja ideja.
11:06
Plank number two: Empower your children.
238
650578
4096
Načelo broj dva:
Osposobite svoju decu.
Osposobite svoju decu.
11:10
Our instinct as parents is to order our kids around.
239
654674
3014
Naš instinkt kao roditelja
je da naređujemo deci.
je da naređujemo deci.
11:13
It's easier, and frankly, we're usually right.
240
657688
2594
Lakše je, a iskreno, obično smo u pravu.
11:16
There's a reason that few systems have been more
241
660282
2063
Postoji razlog zašto je porodica
11:18
waterfall over time than the family.
242
662345
3052
jedan od sistema koji je
najviše nalik vodopadu.
najviše nalik vodopadu.
Ali najbitnija lekcija koju smo naučili
11:21
But the single biggest lesson we learned
243
665397
1817
11:23
is to reverse the waterfall as much as possible.
244
667214
2887
je da vodopad preokrenemo
što je više moguće.
što je više moguće.
11:26
Enlist the children in their own upbringing.
245
670101
3865
Angažujte decu u njihovom odgajanju.
11:29
Just yesterday, we were having our family meeting,
246
673966
1888
Juče smo imali porodični sastanak
11:31
and we had voted to work on overreacting.
247
675854
2879
i složili smo se da radimo
na preteranim reakcijama.
na preteranim reakcijama.
11:34
So we said, "Okay, give us a reward and give us a punishment. Okay?"
248
678733
3296
Rekli smo: "Okej, dajte nam
nagradu i kaznu. U redu?"
nagradu i kaznu. U redu?"
11:37
So one of my daughters threw out, you get five minutes of overreacting time all week.
249
682029
4576
Jedna od ćerki je predložila, nedeljno
imamo pet minuta za preterane reakcije.
imamo pet minuta za preterane reakcije.
11:42
So we kind of liked that.
250
686605
1758
To nam se svidelo.
Ali njena sestra je počela
da koristi sistem.
da koristi sistem.
11:44
But then her sister started working the system.
251
688363
1639
11:45
She said, "Do I get one five-minute overreaction
252
690002
3137
Rekla je: "Da li imam jednu
preteranu reakciju od pet minuta
preteranu reakciju od pet minuta
11:49
or can I get 10 30-second overreactions?"
253
693139
3470
ili 10 preteranih reakcija od 30 sekundi?
11:52
I loved that. Spend the time however you want.
254
696609
2228
To mi se svidelo.
Provodi vreme kako želiš.
Provodi vreme kako želiš.
11:54
Now give us a punishment. Okay.
255
698837
2272
Sad nam daj kaznu. U redu.
11:57
If we get 15 minutes of overreaction time, that's the limit.
256
701109
4904
Ako preterano reagujemo 15 minuta,
to je ograničenje.
to je ograničenje.
12:01
Every minute above that, we have to do one pushup.
257
706013
3424
Za svaki minut preko toga,
moramo da uradimo jedan sklek.
moramo da uradimo jedan sklek.
12:05
So you see, this is working. Now look, this system isn't lax.
258
709437
3384
Vidite, to je rad.
Gledajte, sistem nije blag.
Gledajte, sistem nije blag.
12:08
There's plenty of parental authority going on.
259
712821
2728
Ima dosta roditeljskog autoriteta.
12:11
But we're giving them practice becoming independent,
260
715549
2715
Ali vežbamo ih u tome
da budu nezavisne,
da budu nezavisne,
12:14
which of course is our ultimate goal.
261
718264
2567
što je naravno naš krajnji cilj.
12:16
Just as I was leaving to come here tonight,
262
720831
2318
Baš kada sam kretao ovde večeras,
jedna od mojih ćerki počela je da vrišti.
12:19
one of my daughters started screaming.
263
723149
1824
12:20
The other one said, "Overreaction! Overreaction!"
264
724973
2515
Druga je rekla: "Preterana reakcija!
Preterana reakcija!"
Preterana reakcija!"
12:23
and started counting, and within 10 seconds it had ended.
265
727488
2929
i počela je da broji, i to se završilo
nakon 10 sekundi.
nakon 10 sekundi.
12:26
To me that is a certified agile miracle.
266
730417
3509
Za mene je to potvrda čuda agilnosti.
12:29
(Laughter) (Applause)
267
733926
2207
(Smeh) (Aplauz)
12:32
And by the way, research backs this up too.
268
736133
4736
Uzgred, ovo je potvrđeno i istraživanjem.
12:36
Children who plan their own goals, set weekly schedules,
269
740869
3576
Deca koja postavljaju svoje ciljeve,
imaju nedeljne rasporede,
imaju nedeljne rasporede,
12:40
evaluate their own work build up their frontal cortex
270
744445
3925
procenjuju svoj rad,
poboljšavaju frontalni korteks
poboljšavaju frontalni korteks
12:44
and take more control over their lives.
271
748370
4227
i imaju više kontrole
nad svojim životima.
nad svojim životima.
Poenta je sledeća - moramo dozvoliti deci
da uspeju pod sopstvenim uslovima,
da uspeju pod sopstvenim uslovima,
12:48
The point is, we have to let our children succeed on their own terms,
272
752597
3152
12:51
and yes, on occasion, fail on their own terms.
273
755749
3104
i da, ponekad da prihvatimo i njihove.
12:54
I was talking to Warren Buffett's banker,
274
758853
1748
Pričao sam sa bankarom Vorena Bafeta
12:56
and he was chiding me for not letting my children
275
760601
2242
i gunđao mi je što ne dopuštam deci
12:58
make mistakes with their allowance.
276
762843
2669
da greše sa svojim džeparcem.
13:01
And I said, "But what if they drive into a ditch?"
277
765512
1976
I rekao sam: "A šta ako nalete na zid?"
13:03
He said, "It's much better to drive into a ditch
278
767488
2141
On je rekao: "Bolje je da nalete na zid
13:05
with a $6 allowance than a $60,000-a-year salary
279
769629
3432
sa džeparcem od 6 dolara
nego platom od 60 000 dolara
nego platom od 60 000 dolara
13:08
or a $6 million inheritance."
280
773061
2672
ili nasledstvom od 6 miliona dolara."
13:11
So the bottom line is, empower your children.
281
775733
2480
Suština je u tome
da osposobite svoju decu.
da osposobite svoju decu.
13:14
Plank number three: Tell your story.
282
778213
4786
Načelo broj tri: ispričajte svoju priču.
13:18
Adaptability is fine, but we also need bedrock.
283
782999
3963
Prilagodljivost je u redu,
ali su nam potrebni i temelji.
ali su nam potrebni i temelji.
Džim Kolins, pisac knjige
"Dobro do sjajnog",
"Dobro do sjajnog",
13:22
Jim Collins, the author of "Good To Great,"
284
786962
1940
13:24
told me that successful human organizations of any kind
285
788902
2703
rekao mi je da sve uspešne
ljudske organizacije
ljudske organizacije
13:27
have two things in common:
286
791605
1514
imaju dve zajedničke stvari:
13:29
they preserve the core, they stimulate progress.
287
793119
3295
čuvaju jezgro i stimulišu napredak.
13:32
So agile is great for stimulating progress,
288
796414
2205
Agilnost je sjajna za stimulaciju napretka
13:34
but I kept hearing time and again, you need to preserve the core.
289
798619
3282
ali sam sve češće čuo
da treba da se sačuva jezgro.
da treba da se sačuva jezgro.
13:37
So how do you do that?
290
801901
2054
Pa kako to uraditi?
13:39
Collins coached us on doing something
291
803955
2207
Kolins nas je podučavao da radimo nešto
13:42
that businesses do, which is define your mission
292
806162
2787
što rade firme,
da definišemo svoju misiju
da definišemo svoju misiju
13:44
and identify your core values.
293
808949
2394
i otkrijemo svoje ključne vrednosti.
13:47
So he led us through the process of creating a family mission statement.
294
811343
3558
Proveo nas je kroz proces stvaranja
izjave o misiji naše porodice.
izjave o misiji naše porodice.
Uradili smo porodičnu verziju
poslovnog sastanka.
poslovnog sastanka.
13:50
We did the family equivalent of a corporate retreat.
295
814901
2264
13:53
We had a pajama party.
296
817165
2304
Imali smo žurku u pidžamama.
13:55
I made popcorn. Actually, I burned one, so I made two.
297
819469
3560
Napravio sam kokice. Zapravo, prve
sam spalio, pa sam napravio još jedne.
sam spalio, pa sam napravio još jedne.
13:58
My wife bought a flip chart.
298
823029
872
Supruga je kupila konferencijsku tablu.
13:59
And we had this great conversation, like, what's important to us?
299
823901
2617
Imali smo sjajan razgovor o tome
šta nam je bitno.
šta nam je bitno.
14:02
What values do we most uphold?
300
826518
2125
Koje vrednosti najviše cenimo?
14:04
And we ended up with 10 statements.
301
828643
1756
Dobili smo 10 izjava.
14:06
We are travelers, not tourists.
302
830399
1971
Mi smo putnici, ne turisti.
14:08
We don't like dilemmas. We like solutions.
303
832370
3675
Ne volimo dileme, već rešenja.
14:11
Again, research shows that parents should spend less time
304
836045
3231
Još jednom, istraživanja pokazuju
da roditelji treba da provode
da roditelji treba da provode
manje vremena brinući o tome
šta rade kako ne treba
šta rade kako ne treba
14:15
worrying about what they do wrong
305
839276
2339
14:17
and more time focusing on what they do right,
306
841615
3157
a više vremena fokusirajući se
na ono što rade kako treba,
na ono što rade kako treba,
14:20
worry less about the bad times and build up the good times.
307
844772
4111
da manje brinu o lošim vremenima
i rade na dobrim.
i rade na dobrim.
14:24
This family mission statement is a great way to identify
308
848883
2736
Ova izjava o misiji je sjajan način
da identifikujete
da identifikujete
14:27
what it is that you do right.
309
851619
2520
šta je to što radite dobro.
14:30
A few weeks later, we got a call from the school.
310
854139
2290
Nekoliko nedelja kasnije,
zvali su nas iz škole.
zvali su nas iz škole.
14:32
One of our daughters had gotten into a spat.
311
856429
1988
Jedna od naših ćerki
se posvađala s nekim.
se posvađala s nekim.
14:34
And suddenly we were worried, like, do we have a mean girl on our hands?
312
858417
2356
Odjednom smo se zabrinuli,
da li je ona zlobna?
da li je ona zlobna?
Nismo znali šta radimo,
pa smo je pozvali u moju kancelariju.
pa smo je pozvali u moju kancelariju.
14:36
And we didn't really know what to do,
313
860773
1254
14:37
so we called her into my office.
314
862027
1428
14:39
The family mission statement was on the wall,
315
863455
1657
Izjava o misiji bila je na zidu
14:41
and my wife said, "So, anything up there seem to apply?"
316
865112
3111
a moja supruga je rekla:
"Da li je nešto odatle primenljivo?"
"Da li je nešto odatle primenljivo?"
14:44
And she kind of looked down the list, and she said,
317
868223
2876
Pogledala je na listu i rekla:
14:46
"Bring people together?"
318
871099
1728
"Spajanje ljudi?"
14:48
Suddenly we had a way into the conversation.
319
872827
3456
Odjednom smo imali početak razgovora.
14:52
Another great way to tell your story
320
876283
1332
Još jedan sjajan način
14:53
is to tell your children where they came from.
321
877615
3295
da ispričate priču je da deci
kažete nešto o poreklu.
kažete nešto o poreklu.
14:56
Researchers at Emory gave children a simple
322
880910
2701
Istraživači iz Emorija su decu
jednostavno pitali:
jednostavno pitali:
14:59
"what do you know" test.
323
883611
2082
"Šta znate?"
15:01
Do you know where your grandparents were born?
324
885693
2078
Znate li gde su rođeni vaši baba i deda?
Znate li u koju srednju školu
su išli vaši roditelji?
su išli vaši roditelji?
15:03
Do you know where your parents went to high school?
325
887771
2464
15:06
Do you know anybody in your family
326
890235
1785
Znate li nekoga u vašoj porodici
15:07
who had a difficult situation, an illness, and they overcame it?
327
892020
3999
ko je bio u teškoj situaciji
poput bolesti, i da je prevazišao to?
poput bolesti, i da je prevazišao to?
15:11
The children who scored highest on this "do you know" scale
328
896019
3570
Deca sa najvišim rezultatima na ovom testu
15:15
had the highest self-esteem and a greater sense they could control their lives.
329
899589
4566
imala su najviše samopouzdanja i najjači
osećaj kontrole nad svojim životima.
osećaj kontrole nad svojim životima.
15:20
The "do you know" test was the single biggest predictor
330
904155
3256
Test "šta znaš" je bio
najveći faktor predviđanja
najveći faktor predviđanja
15:23
of emotional health and happiness.
331
907411
2704
emotivnog zdravlja i sreće.
15:26
As the author of the study told me,
332
910115
2176
Kao što je rekao autor istraživanja,
15:28
children who have a sense of -- they're part of a larger narrative
333
912291
3854
deca koja imaju osećaj -
deo su veće priče
deo su veće priče
15:32
have greater self-confidence.
334
916145
2954
i imaju više samopouzdanja.
15:34
So my final plank is, tell your story.
335
919099
2976
Poslednje načelo je -
ispričajte svoju priču.
ispričajte svoju priču.
15:37
Spend time retelling the story of your family's positive moments
336
922075
3991
Provedite vreme prepričavajući
pozitivne trenutke vaše porodice
pozitivne trenutke vaše porodice
15:41
and how you overcame the negative ones.
337
926066
2841
i kako ste prevazišli negativne.
15:44
If you give children this happy narrative,
338
928907
2456
Ako deci date ove srećne priče,
15:47
you give them the tools to make themselves happier.
339
931363
5711
dajete im alat da sebe učine srećnijima.
Bio sam tinejdžer kada sam
prvi put čitao Anu Karenjinu
prvi put čitao Anu Karenjinu
15:52
I was a teenager when I first read "Anna Karenina"
340
937074
2423
15:55
and its famous opening sentence,
341
939497
1752
i čuvenu prvu rečenicu knjige:
15:57
"All happy families are alike.
342
941249
1959
"Sve srećne porodice liče jedna na drugu.
15:59
Each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way."
343
943208
4091
Svaka nesrećna porodica
je nesrećna na svoj način."
je nesrećna na svoj način."
16:03
When I first read that, I thought, "That sentence is inane.
344
947299
3224
Kada sam prvi put to pročitao,
pomislio sam: "Ta rečenica je glupa.
pomislio sam: "Ta rečenica je glupa.
16:06
Of course all happy families aren't alike."
345
950523
3123
Naravno da sve srećne porodice
ne liče jedna na drugu."
ne liče jedna na drugu."
16:09
But as I began working on this project,
346
953646
2341
Ali kako sam počeo da radim
na ovom projektu,
na ovom projektu,
16:11
I began changing my mind.
347
955987
2712
počeo sam da menjam mišljenje.
16:14
Recent scholarship has allowed us, for the first time,
348
958699
2552
Nedavna stipendija
nam je dozvolila da po prvi put
nam je dozvolila da po prvi put
16:17
to identify the building blocks
349
961251
2736
identifikujemo osnove
16:19
that successful families have.
350
963987
2976
srećnih porodica.
16:22
I've mentioned just three here today:
351
966963
2144
Danas sam spomenuo samo tri:
16:25
Adapt all the time, empower the children, tell your story.
352
969107
5167
stalno prilagođavanje, osposobljavanje
i pričanje svoje priče.
i pričanje svoje priče.
16:30
Is it possible, all these years later, to say Tolstoy was right?
353
974289
4371
Da li je nakon svih ovih godina
moguće reći da je Tolstoj bio u pravu?
moguće reći da je Tolstoj bio u pravu?
16:34
The answer, I believe, is yes.
354
978660
3376
Verujem da to jeste slučaj.
16:37
When Leo Tolstoy was five years old,
355
982036
2712
Kada je Lav Tolstoj imao pet godina,
16:40
his brother Nikolay came to him
356
984748
1742
njegov brat Nikolaj mu je prišao
16:42
and said he had engraved the secret to universal happiness
357
986490
2974
i rekao da je urezao tajnu opšte sreće
16:45
on a little green stick, which he had hidden
358
989464
2780
na mali zeleni štap koji je sakrio
16:48
in a ravine on the family's estate in Russia.
359
992244
3116
u uvali na porodičnom imanju u Rusiji.
16:51
If the stick were ever found, all humankind would be happy.
360
995360
4433
Kada bi neko pronašao štap,
celo čovečanstvo bilo bi srećno.
celo čovečanstvo bilo bi srećno.
16:55
Tolstoy became consumed with that stick, but he never found it.
361
999793
5496
Tolstoj je postao opsednut tim štapom,
ali ga nikada nije našao.
ali ga nikada nije našao.
17:01
In fact, he asked to be buried in that ravine where he thought it was hidden.
362
1005289
4351
Zapravo, tražio je da ga sahrane
u toj uvali gde je mislio da je skriven.
u toj uvali gde je mislio da je skriven.
17:05
He still lies there today, covered in a layer of green grass.
363
1009640
4545
I danas počiva tamo,
pokriven slojem zelene trave.
pokriven slojem zelene trave.
17:10
That story perfectly captures for me
364
1014185
2551
Ova priča za mene savršeno obuhvata
17:12
the final lesson that I learned:
365
1016736
2208
poslednju lekciju koju sam naučio:
17:14
Happiness is not something we find,
366
1018944
2664
sreću ne nalazimo,
17:17
it's something we make.
367
1021608
2896
već je stvaramo.
17:20
Almost anybody who's looked at well-run organizations
368
1024504
3270
Skoro svako ko je pogledao
ogranizacije sa dobrim vođstvom
ogranizacije sa dobrim vođstvom
17:23
has come to pretty much the same conclusion.
369
1027774
2981
došao je do skoro istog zaključka.
17:26
Greatness is not a matter of circumstance.
370
1030755
2389
Uspeh nije stvar okolnosti.
17:29
It's a matter of choice.
371
1033144
2864
Stvar je izbora.
17:31
You don't need some grand plan. You don't need a waterfall.
372
1036008
3464
Ne treba vam neki veliki plan.
Ne treba vam vodopad.
Ne treba vam vodopad.
17:35
You just need to take small steps,
373
1039472
2184
Samo koračajte malim koracima,
17:37
accumulate small wins,
374
1041656
2192
zbrajajte male pobede
17:39
keep reaching for that green stick.
375
1043848
2824
i nastavite da posežete
za tim zelenim štapom.
za tim zelenim štapom.
17:42
In the end, this may be the greatest lesson of all.
376
1046672
3649
Možda je na kraju ovo i najveća lekcija.
17:46
What's the secret to a happy family? Try.
377
1050321
4167
Šta je tajna srećne porodice? Pokušajte.
17:50
(Applause)
378
1054488
4000
(Aplauz)
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Bruce Feiler - WriterBruce Feiler is the author of "The Secrets of Happy Families," and the writer/presenter of the PBS miniseries "Walking the Bible."
Why you should listen
Bruce Feiler is the author of nine books, including Walking the Bible, Abraham, and America’s Prophet. He is also the writer/presenter of the PBS miniseries Walking the Bible. His book The Council of Dads tells the uplifting story of how friendship and community can help one survive life’s greatest challenges. Most recently Feiler published The Secrets of Happy Families, in which he calls for a new approach to family dynamics, inspired by cutting-edge techniques gathered from experts in the disciplines of science, business, sports and the military.
Feiler’s early books involve immersing himself in different cultures and bringing other worlds vividly to life. These include Learning to Bow, an account of the year he spent teaching in rural Japan; Looking for Class, about life inside Oxford and Cambridge; and Under the Big Top, which depicts the year he spent performing as a clown in the Clyde Beatty-Cole Bros. Circus.
Walking the Bible describes his perilous, 10,000-mile journey retracing the Five Books of Moses through the desert. The book was hailed as an “instant classic” by the Washington Post and “thoughtful, informed, and perceptive” by the New York Times.
Bruce Feiler | Speaker | TED.com