David Brooks: The lies our culture tells us about what matters -- and a better way to live
David Brooks: Las mentiras que nuestra cultura nos dice sobre las cosas importantes, y una mejor forma de vivir
Writer and thinker David Brooks has covered business, crime and politics over a long career in journalism. Full bio
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por momentos difíciles.
by that failed commitment.
por haber fracasado.
or were leaving.
o estaban por irse a la universidad.
in the conservative movement,
del movimiento conservador,
así que perdí esos amigos también.
I lived alone in an apartment,
where there should have been utensils,
de la cocina, en vez de utensilios,
where there should have been plates,
donde normalmente iban los platos,
pero no amigos de fin de semana.
but I didn't have weekend friends.
were these long, howling silences.
eran largos y prolongados silencios.
came to me in the form of --
me llegó en la forma de...
a burning in my stomach.
un fuego en el estómago.
just fluidity, lack of solidity.
era todo fluidez, nada de solidez.
was the awareness
en ese entonces era la certeza
was just reflective of the emptiness
dentro de mí mismo,
that our culture tells us.
que nuestra cultura nos hace creer.
career success is fulfilling.
que una carrera exitosa da plenitud.
the shame I would feel
de sentirme un fracasado,
que puedo lograr mi propia felicidad,
on their deathbed will tell you,
en su lecho de muerte nos dirá,
is the deep relationships of life,
son las relaciones profundas,
of the meritocracy.
es la de la meritocracia.
is you are what you accomplish.
es que eres lo que logras.
is you can earn dignity
es que puedes obtener dignidad
to prestigious brands.
is conditional love,
es el amor condicional.
is you're not a soul to be purified,
es que nos somos almas a purificar,
que debemos perfeccionar.
a little more than others
han logrado más que otros,
a little more than others.
del pecado es el pecado.
no estar para los amigos,
failing to show up for my friends,
that as I was falling into the valley --
mientras iba cayendo en ese valle,
en el que otros también iban cayendo.
were doing that, too.
el secreto de mi carrera:
the secret to my career;
a mí les pasa a otros también.
to a lot of other people.
de comunicación poco comunes.
with above average communication skills.
estaban desconectados,
a lot of other people were detached
from each other.
over 45 are chronically lonely.
de 45 años están crónicamente solos.
report having meaningful conversation
significativas con sus vecinos.
say they trust their neighbors,
no tiene adeptos.
political party is unaffiliated.
no tiene adeptos.
movement is unaffiliated.
que los problemas de salud mental.
mental health problems are rising.
un 30 % desde 1999.
30 percent since 1999.
el suicidio entre adolescentes
over the last several years,
kill themselves every year;
se suicidan cada año,
decayendo, no aumentando.
I flew out here to say
económica, ambiental y política.
we have environmental crisis,
una crisis social y de relaciones.
and relational crisis;
a raudales de Washington.
coming out of Washington ...
preguntándome cómo salir de este valle.
"You suffer your way to wisdom."
"El camino a la sabiduría es doloroso".
I've had a few realizations.
comencé, me di cuenta de muchas cosas.
la libertad política es fabulosa,
political freedom is great,
because he's uncommitted to things.
no se ha comprometido con nada.
you want to swim in,
en el que queramos nadar,
on the other side.
y plantarnos en el otro lado.
por un mal momento en la vida,
one of those bad moments in life,
o tocar fondo y salir adelante.
que se ha quebrado,
or grief, they get smaller,
arremete contra todos.
they lash out.
gets transmitted."
is that it's an interruption of life.
es que interrumpe la vida.
you thought you were.
quienes creíamos ser.
what you thought was the floor
pensábamos que estaba el suelo
revealing a cavity below,
otra cavidad por debajo,
revealing a cavity below.
otra cavidad debajo.
de nuestro ser que desconocíamos.
you never anticipated,
will fill those depths.
puede llenar esas profundidades.
you get out of the head of the ego
se calla y habla el corazón,
is longing and love for another,
es ser amados por alguien.
described in his book,
lo describió en su libro
que hablaba con su hija
when being in love is burned away.
cuando el enamoramiento se extingue,
and a fortunate accident.
un afortunado accidente.
hacia las otras bajo tierra,
towards each other underground,
had fallen from our branches,
hubieron caído de nuestras ramas,
one tree and not two."
un único árbol, no dos".
you discover is your soul.
que uno descubre es el alma.
or not believe in God,
pero sí en algo dentro de Uds.
that there's a piece of you
y un valor infinitos.
infinite dignity and value.
no tiene más de eso
don't have more of this
it's an obliteration of another soul.
es la destrucción de otra alma.
on a bunch of physical molecules,
un puñado de moléculas físicas;
another person's soul.
el alma de otra persona.
is it yearns for righteousness.
the soul yearns for righteousness.
y el alma anhela lograr justicia.
which I borrowed from Einstein:
el cual tomé prestado de Einstein:
is not going to be solved
en el cual se creó.
on which you created it.
to a different level of consciousness."
a un plano de conciencia distinto".
is you throw yourself on your friends
más profunda que nunca.
that you ever had before.
y estar solo en la naturaleza,
into the wilderness.
donde no se pueda fingir,
where there's nobody there to perform,
que hacer y se desmorone,
and it crumbles,
of being loved.
that when her daughter was born,
que cuando su hija nació,
more than evolution required.
más de lo requerido por la evolución.
that's at the deep of ourself,
en el fondo de nuestro ser,
de los unos por los otros.
you're ready to be rescued.
estamos listos para ser rescatados.
when you're in the valley
de una pareja, Kathy y David.
by a couple named Kathy and David,
pública, llamado Santi.
public school, his name's Santi.
quedarse en un lugar
who needed a place to stay
que a su vez tenía tenía otro amigo.
and that kid had a friend.
niños sentados a la mesa,
25 around the kitchen table,
downstairs in the basement.
a uno de los chicos,
shake hands here.
estrechamos la mano.
on the face of the earth,
abrazar mucho en este mundo,
every Thursday night when I'm in town,
los jueves, cuando estoy en la ciudad,
where you're showing all the way up.
y se muestre abiertamente.
for all the ills of our culture
los males de nuestra cultura,
really putting relationship first,
las relaciones humanas,
these communities are everywhere.
comunidades están en todas partes.
el proyecto: "Tejer: el entramado social".
called "Weave: The Social Fabric."
weavers anywhere, everywhere.
tejedores, siempre, en todas partes.
who grew up in --
in a tough neighborhood.
en una zona difícil en Englewood.
because it was so dangerous,
por lo peligroso que era,
and she saw two little girls
al otro lado de la calle
with broken bottles,
en un terreno baldío.
and she said, "We're not leaving.
y le dijo: "No nos mudaremos.
that abandon that."
en Englewood", y ahora dirige R.A.G.E.,
and now she runs R.A.G.E.,
have had tough valleys.
quien, al regreso de las compras,
who came home from an antiquing trip
had killed himself and their two kids.
suicidado y había matado a sus dos hijos.
es voluntaria en su comunidad,
she volunteers in the community,
with violence, she teaches.
de violencia, enseña.
experience because I was angry.
porque estaba enojada.
what he tried to do to me
marcando una diferencia en el mundo.
screw you, you're not going to do it.'"
tus intenciones. Púdrete, no lo lograrás".
an individualistic life,
una vida individualista,
they have a different set of values.
tienen otra escala de valores.
they have planted themselves down.
y están firmemente establecidos.
que portaba un letrero en la plaza:
in the town square,
"Raíces de empatía".
called Roots of Empathy.
de niños de octavo grado,
a bunch of kids, an eighth grade class,
what the infant is thinking,
lo que el bebé está pensando,
who was bigger than the rest
que era mayor que el resto
bajo cuidado tutelar.
been through the foster care system,
era muy grande y daba miedo,
because he looked big and scary.
Darren, hold the baby.
asking questions about parenthood.
a hacer preguntas sobre la paternidad.
do you think you can be a good father?"
¿se puede llegar a ser un buen padre?".
people out of the valley.
they have an intensity to them.
lo hacen con convicción.
called "Naturalist," about his childhood.
sobre su infancia, "El naturalista".
his parents were divorcing.
cuando él tenía 7 años,
to Paradise Beach in North Florida.
en el norte de Florida.
superaba los límites de mi imaginación".
It existed beyond my imagination."
float beneath his feet.
por debajo de sus pies.
in the awe and wonder.
entre el asombro y la maravilla.
as you do as an adult.
más grandes que cuando adulto.
is that moral intensity,
esa intensidad moral,
over to something
que las personas normales.
at twice the size as normal people.
when we're shooting for our career,
cuando estamos eligiendo una carrera,
it's the expansion of self.
es la expansión del yo.
your team wins the Super Bowl,
tu equipo gana el Supertazón,
it's the dissolving of self.
sino la disolución del yo.
disappears between a mother and her child,
la barrera de la piel entre madre e hijo.
feels just free in nature.
se siente libre en la naturaleza.
tan centrado en su trabajo o causa,
in your work or a cause,
to aim for than happiness.
destino que la felicidad.
of people when they lose it.
de gente cuando la pierde.
en un club nocturno en Londres
wondering where her handbag was.
pensando dónde estaba su bolso.
reached across a sea of bodies
traspasó un mar de cuerpos
over and over, 'Are you feeling it?'
una y otra vez: '¿Lo sientes?'.
I was terrified that I might die,
y tenía terror de morir,
estaba abrumada por la alegría
overwhelmed with delight
should happen to be playing
in the history of the world
en ese equipo de sonido,
into 'Teen Spirit.'
the top of my head blew away,
we gave ourselves up to joy."
Nos entregamos a la alegría".
is two different life mindsets.
son dos mentalidades diferentes.
individual happiness and career success.
felicidad individual y éxito profesional.
I have nothing against it.
no tengo nada en contra de ella.
the other mindset to balance it.
mentalidad para equilibrarla.
about ourselves as a people,
faith in our future,
we don't treat each other as well.
ni nos tratamos bien.
and environmental change.
económico y ambiental,
cultural y de relaciones.
and relational revolution.
of a recovered society.
de una sociedad recuperada.
have found that language.
han encontrado ese idioma.
is that society changes
es que la sociedad cambia
find a better way to live,
de personas cambia para bien,
una mejor forma de vivir.
a better way to live.
all around the country.
comunidades en todo el país.
un poco nuestras vidas,
we're a weaver."
"Soy un tejedor, todos somos uno".
the social unity gets repaired.
la unidad social se repara.
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
David Brooks - Op-ed columnistWriter and thinker David Brooks has covered business, crime and politics over a long career in journalism.
Why you should listen
David Brooks became an Op-Ed columnist for The New York Times in September 2003. He is currently a commentator on "The PBS Newshour," NPR’s "All Things Considered" and NBC's "Meet the Press."
He is the author of Bobos in Paradise and The Social Animal. In April 2015, he released with his fourth book, The Road to Character, which was a #1 New York Times bestseller.
Brooks also teaches at Yale University, and is a member of the American Academy of Arts & Sciences.
Born on August 11, 1961 in Toronto, Canada, Brooks graduated a bachelor of history from the University of Chicago in 1983. He became a police reporter for the City News Bureau, a wire service owned jointly by the Chicago Tribune and Sun-Times.
He worked at The Washington Times and then The Wall Street Journal for nine years. His last post at the Journal was as Op-ed Editor. Prior to that, he was posted in Brussels, covering Russia, the Middle East, South Africa and European affairs. His first post at the Journal was as editor of the book review section, and he filled in as the Journal's movie critic.
He also served as a senior editor at The Weekly Standard for 9 years, as well as contributing editor for The Atlantic and Newsweek.
David Brooks | Speaker | TED.com