TEDxVermilionStreet
Arik Hartmann: Our treatment of HIV has advanced. Why hasn't the stigma changed?
艾瑞克·哈特曼: HIV治疗方法已经进步，为什么污名不改？
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在过去的三十年里，HIV的治疗已经取得长足进展——为什么我们对这种疾病的认知并没有随之进步呢？在被诊断为携带HIV之后，艾瑞克·哈特曼（Arik Hartmann）选择透明地生活，对自己的状态完全公开，努力教育人们。在这个坦率的个人演讲中，他分享了携带HIV的生活——并呼吁我们消除对这种疾病的误解。
Arik Hartmann - Naturalist
Arik Hartmann is tackling the ignorance and misinformation surrounding HIV/AIDS. Full bio
Arik Hartmann is tackling the ignorance and misinformation surrounding HIV/AIDS. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:12
So I want to start this talk
by showing y'all a photo,
by showing y'all a photo,
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首先，我想用一张照片
来开始这个演讲，
来开始这个演讲，
可能很多人以前见过这张照片。
00:16
and it's a photo many of you
have probably seen before.
have probably seen before.
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00:20
So I want you all to take a moment
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那我希望大家花一点时间，
仔细看这张照片，
00:22
and look at this photo,
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并真正关注一下
在脑海中浮现的一些事情，
在脑海中浮现的一些事情，
00:24
and really reflect on some
of the things that come to mind,
of the things that come to mind,
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关注一下那是些什么事，什么话。
00:28
and what are some
of those things, those words.
of those things, those words.
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00:31
Now, I'm going to ask you all
to look at me.
to look at me.
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现在，请大家再看看我。
00:36
What words come to mind
when you look at me?
when you look at me?
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当你看着我时，想到的是什么词？
00:40
What separates that man up there
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照片中那个男人
与我有什么区别？
00:43
from me?
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那照片中的男人名叫
大卫·柯比（David Kirby），
大卫·柯比（David Kirby），
00:46
The man in that photo is named David Kirby
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照片是在1990年他因艾滋相关疾病
即将死去时拍摄，
即将死去时拍摄，
00:48
and it was taken in 1990
as he was dying from AIDS-related illness,
as he was dying from AIDS-related illness,
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后来在“生活杂志”上发表。
00:52
and it was subsequently
published in "Life Magazine."
published in "Life Magazine."
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00:55
The only real thing
separating me from Kirby
separating me from Kirby
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我与柯比的唯一真正区别是，
HIV（人类免疫缺陷病毒）和艾滋病
的治疗方法已经进步了30年。
的治疗方法已经进步了30年。
00:59
is about 30 years of medical advancements
in the way that we treat HIV and AIDS.
in the way that we treat HIV and AIDS.
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01:05
So what I want to ask next is this:
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那么我想问的下一个问题是：
01:10
If we have made such exponential progress
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如果我们在抗击HIV方面
取得如此指数级的进展，
01:12
in combatting HIV,
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为什么对这些病毒的认知
却没有随之进步呢？
却没有随之进步呢？
01:14
why haven't our perceptions
of those with the virus evolved alongside?
of those with the virus evolved alongside?
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01:19
Why does HIV elicit this reaction from us
when it's so easily managed?
when it's so easily managed?
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为什么HIV如此容易控制，
却还会引发我们这种反应呢？
却还会引发我们这种反应呢？
污名化究竟是什么时候开始发生的？
01:25
When did the stigmatization even occur,
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又为什么还没消退呢？
01:29
and why hasn't it subsided?
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01:32
And these are not
easy questions to answer.
easy questions to answer.
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这些都是难以回答的问题。
它们汇聚了太多的
不同因素和想法。
不同因素和想法。
01:36
They're the congealing
of so many different factors and ideas.
of so many different factors and ideas.
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像柯比照片这样的震撼影像，
01:39
Powerful images, like this one of Kirby,
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就是上世纪80和90年代
艾滋病危机的形象，
艾滋病危机的形象，
01:42
these were the faces of the AIDS crisis
in the '80s and '90s,
in the '80s and '90s,
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当时的危机非常明显地冲击了
01:45
and at the time the crisis
had a very obvious impact
had a very obvious impact
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一个已经有污名的人群，
01:48
on an already stigmatized group of people,
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那就是男同性恋。
01:50
and that was gay men.
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01:52
So what the general straight public saw
was this very awful thing
was this very awful thing
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大多异性恋公众所看到的是，
非常可怕的事正发生在
非常可怕的事正发生在
一群已经处于社会边缘的人身上。
01:57
happening to a group of people who
were already on the fringes of society.
were already on the fringes of society.
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02:02
The media at the time began
to use the two almost interchangeably --
to use the two almost interchangeably --
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当时的媒体开始将这两个词
几乎可互换地使用：
几乎可互换地使用：
同性恋和艾滋病——
02:05
gay and AIDS --
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而在1984年共和党全国大会上，
02:07
and at the 1984
Republican National Convention,
Republican National Convention,
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一个发言人笑说，同性恋一词是
“得了艾滋病没？”的缩写。
“得了艾滋病没？”的缩写。
02:10
one of the speakers joked
that gay stood for: "Got AIDS yet?"
that gay stood for: "Got AIDS yet?"
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02:15
And that was the mindset at the time.
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这就是当时大众的普遍心态。
02:18
But as we started
to understand the virus more
to understand the virus more
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但随着我们开始更多地了解这病毒，
以及它的传播方式，
02:21
and how it was transmitted,
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02:22
we realized that that risk
had increased its territory.
had increased its territory.
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我们意识到这种风险
扩大了它的版图。
扩大了它的版图。
02:27
The highly profiled case
of Ryan White in 1985,
of Ryan White in 1985,
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1985年的瑞恩·怀特（Ryan White）
案例引起了高度关注，
案例引起了高度关注，
他是13岁的血友病患者，
02:31
who was a 13-year-old hemophiliac
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通过被污染的血液治疗感染了HIV，
02:33
who had contracted HIV
from a contaminated blood treatment,
from a contaminated blood treatment,
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这标志着美国对HIV的认知
的最深刻的转变。
的最深刻的转变。
02:36
and this marked the most profound shift
in America's perception of HIV.
in America's perception of HIV.
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它不再局限于社会的阴暗角落、
02:42
No longer was it restricted
to these dark corners of society,
to these dark corners of society,
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酷儿（同性恋者）和吸毒者，
02:46
to queers and drug users,
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而是正在影响着
02:48
but now it was affecting people
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社会上认为值得同情的人们，
02:49
that society deemed
worthy of their empathy,
worthy of their empathy,
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孩子们。
02:52
to children.
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但是那种入骨的恐惧
和那种偏见，仍然存在。
和那种偏见，仍然存在。
02:54
But that permeating fear
and that perception, it still lingers.
and that perception, it still lingers.
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下面几个问题我希望
大家可以举手示意。
大家可以举手示意。
02:59
And I want a show of hands
for these next few questions.
for these next few questions.
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你们有多少人知道，
通过治疗，
通过治疗，
03:02
How many of you in here
were aware that with treatment,
were aware that with treatment,
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HIV感染者不仅能够
完全抵御艾滋病，
完全抵御艾滋病，
03:06
those with HIV not only
fend off AIDS completely,
fend off AIDS completely,
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而且能够过上完整且正常的生活？
03:09
but they live full and normal lives?
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03:14
Y'all are educated.
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你们都学过啊。
（笑声）
03:15
(Laughter)
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你们中有多少人知道，
通过治疗，
通过治疗，
03:16
How many of you are aware
that with treatment,
that with treatment,
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HIV感染者可以实现
检测不到病毒的状态，
检测不到病毒的状态，
03:19
those with HIV can reach
an undetectable status,
an undetectable status,
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这种状态使他们
事实上没有传染性？
事实上没有传染性？
03:22
and that makes them
virtually uninfectious?
virtually uninfectious?
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03:27
Much less.
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知道的人少多了。
03:28
How many of you were aware
of the pre- and postexposure treatments
of the pre- and postexposure treatments
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你们中有多少人知道，
现在有暴露前和暴露后治疗，
现在有暴露前和暴露后治疗，
可以把传播风险
03:33
that are available
that reduce the risk of transmission
that reduce the risk of transmission
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降低90%以上？
03:35
by over 90 percent?
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03:39
See, these are incredible advancements
that we have made in fighting HIV,
that we have made in fighting HIV,
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看，这些是在抗击HIV方面
已经取得的惊人进步，
已经取得的惊人进步，
却仍不能削弱多数美国人
03:43
yet they have not managed
to dent the perception
to dent the perception
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对该病毒和病毒感染者的认知。
03:46
that most Americans have
of the virus and those living with it.
of the virus and those living with it.
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03:50
And I don't want you to think
I'm downplaying the danger of this virus,
I'm downplaying the danger of this virus,
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我不想让大家认为我在
对这种病毒的危险轻描淡写，
对这种病毒的危险轻描淡写，
我也不是不知道
艾滋病大流行的悲惨历史。
艾滋病大流行的悲惨历史。
03:56
and I am not ignorant of
the harrowing past of the AIDS epidemic.
the harrowing past of the AIDS epidemic.
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04:00
I am trying to convey
that there is hope for those infected
that there is hope for those infected
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我想表达的是，
那些感染者是有希望的，
那些感染者是有希望的，
HIV不再是80年代的死刑了。
04:03
and HIV is not the death sentence
it was in the '80s.
it was in the '80s.
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04:07
And now you may ask, and I asked
this question myself initially:
this question myself initially:
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那你可能会问，
我当初也这么问过自己：
我当初也这么问过自己：
真实故事在哪里？
04:11
Where are the stories?
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这些HIV感染者在哪？
为什么他们不出声？
为什么他们不出声？
04:13
Where are these people living with HIV?
Why haven't they been vocal?
Why haven't they been vocal?
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没有看到成功案例，
04:17
How can I believe these successes,
or these statistics,
or these statistics,
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我怎么相信这些成功，
或这些统计数字？
或这些统计数字？
04:21
without seeing the successes?
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04:24
And this is actually
a very easy question for me to answer.
a very easy question for me to answer.
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这个问题对我来说
实际上很容易回答。
实际上很容易回答。
04:28
Fear, stigma and shame:
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恐惧、污名和耻辱，
可以说，是这些让
HIV感染者隐姓埋名。
HIV感染者隐姓埋名。
04:32
these keep those living with HIV
in the closet, so to speak.
in the closet, so to speak.
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04:36
Our sexual histories are as personal
to us as our medical histories,
to us as our medical histories,
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对我们来说，性史
与病历一样是隐私，
与病历一样是隐私，
当两者重叠时，
04:40
and when you overlap the two,
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你会发现自己处在一个
非常敏感的空间里。
非常敏感的空间里。
04:41
you can find yourself
in a very sensitive space.
in a very sensitive space.
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对坦诚之后别人会
如何看待我们的恐惧，
如何看待我们的恐惧，
04:44
The fear of how others
perceive us when we're honest
perceive us when we're honest
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让我们逃避生活中的很多事情，
04:47
keeps us from doing many things in life,
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HIV阳性人群就是这样。
04:50
and this is the case
for the HIV-positive population.
for the HIV-positive population.
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04:53
To face social scrutiny and ridicule
is the price that we pay for transparency,
is the price that we pay for transparency,
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面对社会的评判和嘲笑
是我们公开隐私的代价，
是我们公开隐私的代价，
如果能够像没有HIV的人
一样若无其事，
一样若无其事，
04:59
and why become a martyr
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05:01
when you can effectively pass
as someone without HIV?
as someone without HIV?
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那还为什么去做烈士？
毕竟，没有任何身体迹象
表明你携带病毒。
表明你携带病毒。
05:05
After all, there are no
physical indications you have the virus.
physical indications you have the virus.
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你身上没有标记。
05:08
There's no sign that you wear.
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05:12
There is safety in assimilation,
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同化带来安全感，
隐身也有安全感。
05:14
and there is safety in invisibility.
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05:18
I'm here to throw back that veil
and share my story.
and share my story.
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但我来这里是为了扔掉面纱，
分享我的故事。
分享我的故事。
05:23
So in the fall of 2014,
I was a sophomore in college
I was a sophomore in college
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2014年秋，我上大学二年级，
就像多数大学生一样，
我性行为活跃，
我性行为活跃，
05:27
and like most college students,
I was sexually active,
I was sexually active,
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通常我都采取预防措施，
以尽量减小性病风险。
以尽量减小性病风险。
05:30
and I generally took precautions
to minimize the risk that sex carries.
to minimize the risk that sex carries.
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我说通常，是因为
并没有确保每一次都安全。
并没有确保每一次都安全。
05:35
Now, I say generally,
because I wasn't always safe.
because I wasn't always safe.
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而摔倒在地只需要迈错一步而已，
05:39
It only takes a single misstep
before we're flat on the ground,
before we're flat on the ground,
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我迈错的那一步很简单,
05:42
and my misstep is pretty obvious.
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发生了未加保护的性行为，
而我也并没有多想。
而我也并没有多想。
05:44
I had unprotected sex,
and I didn't think much of it.
and I didn't think much of it.
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大概三周之后，
05:47
Fast-forward about three weeks,
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我感觉像被牛群踩过一样。
05:49
and it felt like I'd been trampled
by a herd of wildebeest.
by a herd of wildebeest.
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身体的疼痛是在那之前或之后
都从未经历过的。
都从未经历过的。
05:54
The aches in my body were
like nothing I have felt before or since.
like nothing I have felt before or since.
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我出现了发烧和寒颤，
05:58
I would get these bouts
of fever and chill.
of fever and chill.
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恶心呕吐，走路都困难。
06:01
I would reel with nausea,
and it was difficult to walk.
and it was difficult to walk.
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06:05
Being a biology student,
I had some prior exposure to disease,
I had some prior exposure to disease,
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作为生物专业的学生，
我以前接触过疾病，
我以前接触过疾病，
而且作为知识丰富的男同性恋，
我也读过关于HIV的文章，
我也读过关于HIV的文章，
06:09
and being a fairly informed gay man,
I had read a bit on HIV,
I had read a bit on HIV,
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所以我知道，这是一种血清转化，
06:13
so to me, it clicked
that this was seroconversion,
that this was seroconversion,
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或者有时叫做急性HIV感染。
06:16
or as it's sometimes called,
acute HIV infection.
acute HIV infection.
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这是人体对HIV抗原
06:19
And this is the body's reaction
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产生抗体的反应。
06:21
in producing antibodies
to the HIV antigen.
to the HIV antigen.
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重点是要了解，并不是每个人
都经历这个发病阶段，
都经历这个发病阶段，
06:24
It's important to note that not everybody
goes through this phase of sickness,
goes through this phase of sickness,
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而我是经历了
该发病阶段的幸运者之一。
该发病阶段的幸运者之一。
06:28
but I was one of the lucky ones who did.
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我很幸运是因为，这些身体症状
06:31
And I was lucky as in,
there were these physical symptoms
there were these physical symptoms
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在告诉我，嘿，出问题了，
06:34
that let me know, hey, something is wrong,
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并让我早点去做病毒检测。
06:37
and it let me detect
the virus pretty early.
the virus pretty early.
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06:41
So just to clarify,
just to hit the nail on head,
just to hit the nail on head,
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所以就为了确认，
为了被一针见血地告知，
为了被一针见血地告知，
我在学校做了测试。
06:45
I got tested on campus.
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06:47
And they said they would call me
the next morning with the results,
the next morning with the results,
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他们先说第二天早上
会打电话告诉我结果，
会打电话告诉我结果，
然而当他们给我打电话时，
06:51
and they called me,
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叫我本人到场与医生谈谈。
06:53
but they asked me to come in
and speak to the doctor on staff.
and speak to the doctor on staff.
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医生对我的反应我并没意料到。
06:56
And the reaction I received from her
wasn't what I was expecting.
wasn't what I was expecting.
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07:01
She reassured me what I already knew,
that this wasn't a death sentence,
that this wasn't a death sentence,
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她确认了我已经知道的事实，
这并不是死刑，
这并不是死刑，
她甚至愿意让我联系她哥哥——
07:05
and she even offered
to put me in contact with her brother,
to put me in contact with her brother,
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一个从90年代初期开始携带HIV的人。
07:08
who had been living with HIV
since the early '90s.
since the early '90s.
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07:11
I declined her offer,
but I was deeply touched.
but I was deeply touched.
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我拒绝了她的好意，但深受感动。
我所预期的是被谴责。
07:15
I was expecting to be reprimanded.
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我在等着的是怜悯和失望，
07:17
I was expecting pity and disappointment,
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但我看到的是同情和人性温暖，
07:20
and I was shown compassion
and human warmth,
and human warmth,
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我永远感激这第一次的交流。
07:23
and I'm forever grateful
for that first exchange.
for that first exchange.
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07:27
So obviously for a few weeks,
I was a physical mess.
I was a physical mess.
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当然，之后的几个星期，
我的身体状况一塌糊涂。
我的身体状况一塌糊涂。
但在情绪上、心理上，我还好。
07:32
Emotionally, mentally, I was doing OK.
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我接受了这个事实。
07:34
I was taking it well.
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07:36
But my body was ravaged,
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但是我的身体备受折磨，
而我身边的人还不知道。
07:38
and those close to me,
they weren't oblivious.
they weren't oblivious.
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所以我请室友们坐下，
07:41
So I sat my roommates down,
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告诉他们我已经被
诊断出感染了HIV，
诊断出感染了HIV，
07:43
and I let them know
I'd been diagnosed with HIV,
I'd been diagnosed with HIV,
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我正要接受治疗，
也希望他们不要担心。
也希望他们不要担心。
07:46
that I was about to receive treatment,
and I didn't want them to worry.
and I didn't want them to worry.
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我还记得他们脸上的表情。
07:51
And I remember the look on their faces.
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他们在沙发上互相抱着哭，
07:54
They were holding each other
on the couch and they were crying,
on the couch and they were crying,
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我就安慰他们。
07:57
and I consoled them.
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这是我自己的悲催消息，
我却在安慰他们，
我却在安慰他们，
07:58
I consoled them about my own bad news,
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但看到他们在乎我，
是很温暖的感觉。
是很温暖的感觉。
08:01
but it was heartwarming
to see that they cared.
to see that they cared.
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08:05
But from that night, I noticed a shift
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但从那天晚上开始，我注意到
他们在家对待我的方式变了。
08:08
in the way that I was treated at home.
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08:11
My roommates wouldn't
touch anything of mine,
touch anything of mine,
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室友们不碰我的东西，
也不吃我煮的饭。
08:13
and they wouldn't eat
anything I had cooked.
anything I had cooked.
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08:16
Now, in South Louisiana,
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可是，在南路易斯安那州，
我们都知道，没人拒绝食物。
08:19
we all know that you don't refuse food.
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（笑声）
08:21
(Laughter)
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而我是个超棒的厨师，
所以不要以为是我厨艺差。
所以不要以为是我厨艺差。
08:22
And I'm a damn good cook,
so don't think that passed me by.
so don't think that passed me by.
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（笑声）
08:25
(Laughter)
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但从这些最初的沉默暗示开始，
他们的厌恶变得越来越明显，
他们的厌恶变得越来越明显，
08:28
But from these first silent hints,
their aversion got gradually more obvious
their aversion got gradually more obvious
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也越来越无礼。
08:32
and more offensive.
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他们让我把牙刷从洗手间拿走，
08:34
I was asked to move my toothbrush
from the bathroom,
from the bathroom,
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让我不要共用毛巾，
08:38
I was asked to not share towels,
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甚至让我洗衣服时设置更高的温度。
08:40
and I was even asked
to wash my clothes on a hotter setting.
to wash my clothes on a hotter setting.
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08:44
This wasn't head lice, y'all.
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嘿，这不是头虱，
这也不是疥疮，这是HIV。
08:46
This wasn't scabies. This was HIV.
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它的传播渠道是血液、
08:48
It can be transmitted through blood,
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诸如精液或阴道液的体液、
08:51
sexual fluids like semen or vaginal fluids
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和母乳。
08:54
and breast milk.
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既然我没有与室友上床，
08:55
Since I wasn't sleeping with my roommates,
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也没有给他们母乳喂养——
08:58
I wasn't breastfeeding them --
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（笑声）
09:00
(Laughter)
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我们也没有重演“暮光之城”，
09:01
and we weren't reenacting "Twilight,"
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我对他们完全没有危险，
09:03
I was of no risk to them
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我也明确告诉了他们，
09:05
and I made this aware to them,
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但是，这种不适仍在继续，
09:08
but still, this discomfort, it continued,
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直到最后我被要求搬出去。
09:10
until eventually I was asked to move out.
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09:13
And I was asked to move out
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我被要求搬出去，
因为其中一个室友把
我的状况告诉了她父母。
我的状况告诉了她父母。
09:15
because one of my roommates
had shared my status with her parents.
had shared my status with her parents.
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她把我的个人医疗信息
告诉给陌生人。
告诉给陌生人。
09:18
She shared my personal
medical information to strangers.
medical information to strangers.
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09:25
And now I'm doing that
in a roomful of 300 of y'all,
in a roomful of 300 of y'all,
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虽然现在我正与你们300人分享，
但那时的分享让我很不舒服，
09:28
but at the time, this was not
something I was comfortable with,
something I was comfortable with,
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他们对女儿与我在
同一屋檐下表示不安。
同一屋檐下表示不安。
09:32
and they expressed their discomfort
with their daughter living with me.
with their daughter living with me.
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09:37
So being gay, raised
in a religious household
in a religious household
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作为同性恋，
在宗教家庭中长大，
在宗教家庭中长大，
生活在南方，
09:39
and living in the South,
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歧视对我来说并不陌生。
09:41
discrimination wasn't new to me.
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09:43
But this form was,
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但是这种形式是陌生的，
而且是非常令人失望的，
09:46
and it was tremendously disappointing
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因为它来自一个不太可能的来源。
09:48
because it came
from such an unlikely source.
from such an unlikely source.
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3000
09:52
Not only were these
college-educated people,
college-educated people,
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这些人不仅受过大学教育，
不仅是LGBT社群的成员，
09:55
not only were they other members
of the LGBT community,
of the LGBT community,
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而且他们还是我的朋友。
09:59
but they were also my friends.
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10:02
So I did. I moved out
at the end of the semester.
at the end of the semester.
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所以我认了。
我在学期末搬出去了。
我在学期末搬出去了。
但那不是为了让他们满意。
10:05
But it wasn't to appease them.
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那是出于对我自己的尊重。
10:07
It was out of respect for myself.
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我没打算屈服于那些
10:10
I wasn't going to subject myself to people
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不愿意补救自己无知的人，
10:12
who were unwilling
to remedy their ignorance,
to remedy their ignorance,
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也不会让这已经进入我生命的东西
10:15
and I wasn't going to let something
that was now a part of me
that was now a part of me
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被当作工具来敌视我。
10:18
ever be used as a tool against me.
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所以我选择将自己的状态透明化，
10:21
So I opted for transparency
about my status,
about my status,
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永远可见。
10:25
always being visible.
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10:27
And this is what I like to call
being the everyday advocate.
being the everyday advocate.
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这就是我所说的
做个日常倡导者。
做个日常倡导者。
这种透明的重点，
这个日常倡导的重点，
这个日常倡导的重点，
10:31
The point of this transparency,
the point of this everyday advocacy,
the point of this everyday advocacy,
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是消除无知，
10:35
was to dispel ignorance,
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无知是一个非常可怕的词。
10:37
and ignorance is a very scary word.
195
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我们不想被视为无知者，
10:40
We don't want to be seen as ignorant,
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2456
我们也绝对不希望被称为无知者。
10:42
and we definitely
don't want to be called it.
don't want to be called it.
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但无知跟愚蠢不一样。
10:45
But ignorance is not
synonymous with stupid.
synonymous with stupid.
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无知不是学习能力的缺失。
10:48
It's not the inability to learn.
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它是你学会之前的状态。
10:50
It's the state you're in before you learn.
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3136
所以每当我看到无知的人，
10:54
So when I saw someone
coming from a place of ignorance,
coming from a place of ignorance,
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我看到的是他们学习的机会。
10:57
I saw an opportunity for them to learn.
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希望是，如果我能传播一点教育，
11:00
And hopefully, if I could
spread some education,
spread some education,
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那么我可以帮助别人
11:03
then I could mitigate
situations for others
situations for others
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减轻我与我室友经历的状况，
11:06
like I had experienced with my roommates
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在羞耻的队列里拯救某人。
11:08
and save someone else
down the line that humiliation.
down the line that humiliation.
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11:12
So the reactions I received
haven't been all positive.
haven't been all positive.
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我收到的反馈并不全是正面的。
11:17
Here in the South,
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在南部这里，
我们背负很多污名，
因为宗教压力，
因为宗教压力，
11:19
we have a lot stigma
due to religious pressures,
due to religious pressures,
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因为缺乏全面的性教育，
11:22
our lack of a comprehensive sex education
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以及对涉及性的一切
持有的普遍保守观念。
持有的普遍保守观念。
11:25
and our general conservative outlook
on anything sexual.
on anything sexual.
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我们把这当作同性恋疾病。
11:28
We view this as a gay disease.
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11:31
Globally, most new HIV infections
occur between heterosexual partners,
occur between heterosexual partners,
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世界上大多数新的HIV感染
发生在异性伴侣之间，
发生在异性伴侣之间，
在美国，女性，特别是有色女性
11:36
and here in the States,
women, especially women of color,
women, especially women of color,
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的风险正在增加。
11:38
are at an increased risk.
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11:40
This is not a gay disease.
It never has been.
It never has been.
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这不是同性恋疾病。
它从来都不是。
它从来都不是。
这是一个所有人都应该
关心的疾病。
关心的疾病。
11:43
It's a disease we should
all be concerned with.
all be concerned with.
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11:47
So initially, I felt limited.
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最初，我感到了局限。
我想扩大我的范围，
超越我周围的环境。
超越我周围的环境。
11:50
I wanted to expand my scope
and reach beyond what was around me.
and reach beyond what was around me.
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11:55
So naturally,
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很自然地，
11:58
I turned to the dark underworld
of online dating apps,
of online dating apps,
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我转向在线约会应用程序
的阴暗地下世界，
的阴暗地下世界，
像Grindr这样的应用程序，
12:01
to apps like Grindr,
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对于那些不熟悉的人，
12:04
and for those of you who are unfamiliar,
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这些是针对同性恋男子的
约会应用程序。
约会应用程序。
12:06
these are dating apps
targeted towards gay men.
targeted towards gay men.
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这里可以上传个人资料和照片，
12:08
You can upload a profile and a picture
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它会显示一定距离内可以约的人。
12:10
and it will show you
available guys within a radius.
available guys within a radius.
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2696
你们大概听说过Tinder。
12:13
Y'all have probably heard of Tinder.
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Grindr存在的时间长得多，
12:15
Grindr has been around for a lot longer,
228
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1936
因为在教堂或小商店遇见，
或异性恋会用手机约会之前
或异性恋会用手机约会之前
12:17
since it was much harder
to meet your future gay husband
to meet your future gay husband
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12:20
at church or the grocery store,
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使用的任何方法，
12:22
or whatever straight people did
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对于遇见你未来的同性恋丈夫，
12:24
before they found out
they could date on their phones.
they could date on their phones.
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难度都很大。
12:27
(Laughter)
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（笑声）
所以在Grindr上，如果你
看到喜欢的照片或文字，
看到喜欢的照片或文字，
12:28
So on Grindr, if you liked
what you saw or read,
what you saw or read,
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736200
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可以给他发个短信，
可以见面，也可以做别的事情。
可以见面，也可以做别的事情。
12:31
you could send someone a message,
you can meet up, you can do other things.
you can meet up, you can do other things.
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在我的简介中，
我明确表示我有HIV，
我明确表示我有HIV，
12:35
So on my profile,
I obviously stated that I had HIV,
I obviously stated that I had HIV,
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但处于检测不到的状态，
并且欢迎就我的状况提问。
并且欢迎就我的状况提问。
12:39
I was undetectable, and I welcomed
questions about my status.
questions about my status.
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我收到了许多问题
12:44
And I received a lot of questions
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和很多意见，
既有正面的也有负面的。
既有正面的也有负面的。
12:46
and a lot of comments,
both positive and negative.
both positive and negative.
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2520
12:49
And I want to start with the negative,
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我想先说负面的，
只是为了阐明一些我之前
提到的这种无知。
提到的这种无知。
12:52
just to frame some of this ignorance
that I've mentioned before.
that I've mentioned before.
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3040
12:56
And most of these negative comments
were passing remarks or assumptions.
were passing remarks or assumptions.
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4536
这些负面评论的大部分
传递的是评论或假设。
传递的是评论或假设。
他们会假设我的性生活或
我的性行为习惯。
我的性行为习惯。
13:00
They would assume things
about my sex life or my sex habits.
about my sex life or my sex habits.
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3536
他们会假设我把自己
或他人置于危险之中。
或他人置于危险之中。
13:04
They would assume
I put myself or others at risk.
I put myself or others at risk.
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2480
13:07
But very often I would just be met
with these passing ignorant remarks.
with these passing ignorant remarks.
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3880
但是很多时候，我只是收到
这些无知的言论。
这些无知的言论。
13:11
In the gay community,
it's common to hear the word "clean"
it's common to hear the word "clean"
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在同性恋群体中，
当你提到HIV阴性的人时，
当你提到HIV阴性的人时，
常听到“干净”这个词。
13:15
when you're referring to someone
who is HIV negative.
who is HIV negative.
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当然，如果你有HIV，
那么就是它的反面，
那么就是它的反面，
13:18
Of course the flip side to that
is being unclean, or dirty,
is being unclean, or dirty,
248
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3576
13:22
when you do have HIV.
249
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1656
“不洁”或者肮脏。
我不是敏感，
13:23
Now, I'm not sensitive
250
791840
1456
也只有在地里忙一天之后
我才真的会脏，
我才真的会脏，
13:25
and I'm only truly dirty
after a day in the field,
after a day in the field,
251
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2840
13:29
but this is damaging language.
252
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1936
但这是一种破坏性的语言。
这是一个由群体驱动的污名，
13:31
This is a community-driven stigma
253
799080
2416
让很多同性恋者不愿透漏身份，
13:33
that keeps many gay men
from disclosing their status,
from disclosing their status,
254
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让新诊断出来的人
13:36
and it keeps those newly diagnosed
255
804800
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不敢在他们自己的群体里寻求支持，
13:38
from seeking support
within their own community,
within their own community,
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我对此深感痛心。
13:40
and I find that truly distressing.
257
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13:43
But thankfully, the positive responses
have been a lot more numerous,
have been a lot more numerous,
258
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不过要感谢的是，
正面回应的数量多得多，
正面回应的数量多得多，
都是来自好奇的人们。
13:47
and they came from guys who were curious.
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而且他们对传播的风险感到好奇，
13:49
And they were curious
about the risks of transmission,
about the risks of transmission,
260
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或者好奇“检测不到”具体什么意思，
13:52
or what exactly "undetectable" meant,
261
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2616
或者是去哪可以做检测，
13:55
or where they could get tested,
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有些人会询问我的经历，
13:57
or some guys would ask me
about my experiences,
about my experiences,
263
825040
2216
我也可以和他们分享我的故事。
13:59
and I could share my story with them.
264
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14:01
But most importantly,
265
829800
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但最重要的是，
我也会接触到刚刚诊断出HIV的人，
14:04
I would get approached by guys
who were newly diagnosed with HIV
who were newly diagnosed with HIV
266
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他们害怕，孤立无助，
14:08
and they were scared, and they were alone,
267
836400
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不知道下一步怎么办。
14:10
and they didn't know
what step to take next.
what step to take next.
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14:13
They didn't want to tell their family,
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他们不想告诉家里人，
不想告诉朋友，
14:15
they didn't want to tell their friends
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他们觉得被毁了，觉得自己很脏。
14:17
and they felt damaged,
and they felt dirty.
and they felt dirty.
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14:21
And I did whatever I could
to immediately calm them,
to immediately calm them,
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我尽一切可能让他们立即冷静下来，
然后让他们与AcadianaCares联系，
14:24
and then I would put them in contact
with AcadianaCares,
with AcadianaCares,
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那是我们社区具备的很棒的资源，
14:27
which is a wonderful resource
we have in our community
we have in our community
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为HIV感染者服务。
14:30
for those with HIV.
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而且我让他们和我
私下认识的人联系，
私下认识的人联系，
14:32
And I'd put them in contact
with people I knew personally
with people I knew personally
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让他们不但有安全的空间
可以重整心情，
可以重整心情，
14:35
so that they could not only
have this safe space to feel human again,
have this safe space to feel human again,
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还拥有所需的资源
14:39
but so they could also have
the resources they needed
the resources they needed
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来负担治疗。
14:42
in affording their treatment.
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这是迄今为止我的透明化
14:44
And this was by far
the most humbling aspect
the most humbling aspect
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带来的最普及的方面，
14:47
of my transparency,
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我还可以给像我一样痛苦过
的人带来积极影响，
的人带来积极影响，
14:49
that I could have some positive impact
on those who were suffering like I did,
on those who were suffering like I did,
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14:54
that I could help those
who were in the dark,
who were in the dark,
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我可以帮助那些身处黑暗中的人，
因为我也曾经历过，
那不好过。
那不好过。
14:57
because I had been there,
and it wasn't a good place to be.
and it wasn't a good place to be.
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15:01
These guys came from
all different backgrounds,
all different backgrounds,
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这些人来自各种不同的背景，
他们很多人并不像我一样懂很多，
15:03
and many of them
weren't as informed as I had been,
weren't as informed as I had been,
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他们是带着恐惧来找我的。
15:06
and they were coming to me
from a place of fear.
from a place of fear.
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15:09
Some of these people I knew personally,
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一部分人与我私下相识，
或者他们知道我，
15:11
or they knew of me,
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但更多的人是匿名的。
15:13
but many more, they were anonymous.
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他们的身份档案一片空白，
15:15
They were these blank profiles
who were too afraid to show their faces
who were too afraid to show their faces
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对我说出实情后又不敢露脸的人。
15:19
after what they had told me.
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15:21
And on the topic of transparency,
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关于透明度的话题，
我想留下几点想法。
15:24
I want to leave y'all with a few thoughts.
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15:26
I found that with whatever risk
or gamble I took
or gamble I took
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我发现，公开自己的身份，
无论有多冒险或孤注一掷，
15:30
in putting my face out there,
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相比我收到的任何
负面评价、任何抨击，
负面评价、任何抨击，
15:32
it was well worth any negative comment,
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15:34
any flak I received,
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都是很值的，
15:36
because I felt I was able to make
this real and this tangible impact.
this real and this tangible impact.
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因为我觉得自己能够
做出真正的、切实的影响。
做出真正的、切实的影响。
15:41
And it showed me that our efforts resound,
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它也表明，我们的努力是有回报的，
去善意改变我们遇到的生命，
15:44
that we can alter the lives
that we encounter for the good,
that we encounter for the good,
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他们也会接受那份动力，
并把它推得更高。
并把它推得更高。
15:48
and they in turn can take that momentum
and push it even further.
and push it even further.
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15:52
And if any of you or anyone you know
is dealing with HIV,
is dealing with HIV,
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如果你或你认识的任何人
正在对抗HIV，
正在对抗HIV，
或者你想了解你的社群中有哪些资源，
15:56
or if you want to see what resources
you have in your community,
you have in your community,
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或者只想多了解点这种疾病，
15:59
or just educate yourself
more on the disease,
more on the disease,
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16:02
here are some wonderful national sites
that you can access
that you can access
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那么可以访问这些
很棒的全国网站，
很棒的全国网站，
也欢迎在演讲之后找我，
16:05
and you are more than welcome
to find me after this talk
to find me after this talk
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问我任何你想问的问题。
16:08
and ask me anything you'd like.
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我们都听过“透过树木看见森林”，
16:11
We've all heard the phrase
"to see the forest through the trees,"
"to see the forest through the trees,"
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16:15
so I implore all of you here to really
see the human through the disease.
see the human through the disease.
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所以我在这里恳请大家
透过疾病看见人性。
透过疾病看见人性。
16:21
It's a very easy thing
to see numbers and statistics
to see numbers and statistics
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看到数字和统计数据时，
16:25
and only see the perceived dangers.
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很容易只看到已知的危险。
16:28
It's a much harder thing to see
all the faces behind those numbers.
all the faces behind those numbers.
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而看见那些数字背后的
面孔要难得多。
面孔要难得多。
16:34
So when you find yourself
thinking those things, those words,
thinking those things, those words,
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所以，当你发现自己
在想着那些事，那些词语，
在想着那些事，那些词语，
那些看着大卫·柯比会想起的东西，
16:37
what you might have thought
looking at David Kirby,
looking at David Kirby,
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16:40
I ask you instead,
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我请你，
想想儿子，
16:43
think son,
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16:45
or think brother,
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或想想兄弟，
16:47
think friend
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想想朋友，
16:49
and most importantly, think human.
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最重要的，想想人类。
16:52
Seek education when faced with ignorance,
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当面对无知时，寻求教育，
时刻保持警觉，
16:55
and always be mindful,
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始终富有同情心。
16:57
and always be compassionate.
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17:00
Thank you.
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谢谢。
（掌声）
17:01
(Applause)
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ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Arik Hartmann - NaturalistArik Hartmann is tackling the ignorance and misinformation surrounding HIV/AIDS.
Why you should listen
Arik Hartmann was diagnosed with HIV in 2014 at his college campus clinic after a bout of flu-like illness. After disclosing his HIV status to roommates, he was faced with increasing ostracization and ultimately was asked to leave the home he had been renting. From that moment he decided to always be open about his HIV status and to use it open a dialogue and educate others. He began tackling the ignorance and misinformation surrounding HIV/AIDS within his local community in Louisiana, and more surprisingly in the gay community. Using dating apps like Grindr and Tinder as a medium for HIV advocacy, he began to educate strangers about HIV/AIDS and to help those newly diagnosed acquire treatment and care. Hartmann believes that by being transparent with our illnesses and health we can all engage and educate those around us -- and hopefully dispel damaging stigmas.
Though his advocacy is HIV oriented, Hartmann is a passionate naturalist and can be found catching snakes and frogs in his free time. He has worked with the United States Geological Survey assisting in coastal ecology and herpetological research. He received his undergraduate degree in Resource Biology and Biodiversity from the University of Louisiana at Lafayette. He currently lives in Gainesville, Florida and plans to pursue a master's degree in wildlife ecology.
Arik Hartmann | Speaker | TED.com