TED2007
Maira Kalman: The illustrated woman
Maira Kalman，畫裡畫外的人生
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身兼作家與插畫家身分的Maira Kalman，曾為紐約客雜誌繪製封面，也創作兒童及成人的繪本，她透過這場座談，與大家分享自己的生命歷程與創作。她本人就如同她的創作，美妙迷人、超乎想像又充滿智慧。
Maira Kalman - Illustrator, author
Maira Kalman's wise, witty drawings have appeared on numberless New Yorker covers, in a dozen children's books, and throughout the pages of the Elements of Style. Her latest book, The Principles of Uncertainty, is the result of a year-long illustrated blog she kept for the New York Times. Full bio
Maira Kalman's wise, witty drawings have appeared on numberless New Yorker covers, in a dozen children's books, and throughout the pages of the Elements of Style. Her latest book, The Principles of Uncertainty, is the result of a year-long illustrated blog she kept for the New York Times. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:25
What I am always thinking about
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我常在想
00:28
is what this session is about, which is called simplicity.
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這場名為「簡單」的討論是要做什麼
00:32
And almost, I would almost call it being simple-minded,
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而且，我甚至會稱這是場「頭腦簡單」的討論
00:36
but in the best sense of the word.
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但是我是以最崇高的方式去解讀這句「簡單」
00:38
I'm trying to figure out two very simple things:
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我一直在試著理解兩件很簡單的小事
00:42
how to live and how to die, period.
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如何過活? 以及如何死亡? 就這樣。
00:44
That's all I'm trying to do, all day long.
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整天就在想著這兩件事
00:46
And I'm also trying to have some meals, and have some snacks,
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當然我也還是會吃飯，偶爾來些點心
00:49
and, you know, and yell at my children, and do all the normal things
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對孩子咆哮，以及其他日常瑣事
00:53
that keep you grounded.
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好讓我感覺日子踏實
00:56
So, I was fortunate enough to be born a very dreamy child.
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我非常幸運，從小就愛做白日夢
01:03
My older sister was busy torturing my parents,
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我的姐姐總是對爸媽疲勞轟炸
01:07
and they were busy torturing her.
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我爸媽也同樣忙著折磨她
01:09
I was lucky enough to be completely ignored,
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於是我在家中很幸運能被完全忽視
01:12
which is a fabulous thing, actually, I want to tell you.
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這真的超棒的! 真的不騙你!
01:14
So, I was able to completely daydream my way through my life.
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所以我整天做著我的白日夢
01:20
And I finally daydreamed my way into NYU, at a very good time, in 1967,
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夢著夢著就夢進了紐約大學 -- 當時是1967年
01:27
where I met a man who was trying to blow up the math building of NYU.
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我在那裡遇見了一個男人，他整天盤算著要炸掉數學大樓
01:33
And I was writing terrible poetry and knitting sweaters for him.
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我則是一邊寫著糟糕的詩，一邊幫他織著毛衣
01:37
And feminists hated us, and the whole thing was wretched
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女性主義者討厭我們，整個生活從一開始就讓人難受
01:42
from beginning to end.
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直到最後
01:44
But I kept writing bad poetry, and he didn't blow up the math building,
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但我還是繼續寫著很糟的詩詞，他當然沒炸毀數學大樓
01:48
but he went to Cuba.
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卻去了古巴
01:49
But I gave him the money, because I was from Riverdale
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旅費用的是我的錢，因為我來自里佛岱爾(Riverdale)區
01:51
so I had more money than he did.
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所以理當比他寬裕些
01:53
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
01:54
And that was a good thing to help, you know, the cause.
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這是件好事，你知道的，能夠贊助他
01:58
But, then he came back, and things happened,
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不過，他回來之後，事情開始不同
02:02
and I decided I really hated my writing,
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我開始受不了自己寫的那些東西
02:05
that it was awful, awful, purple prose.
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寫得很差勁，華麗而空洞
02:09
And I decided that I wanted to tell --
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我還是想說些...
02:11
but I still wanted to tell a narrative story
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但我還是想說一段故事
02:13
and I still wanted to tell my stories.
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關於我的故事
02:15
So I decided that I would start to draw. How hard could that be?
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我想就用畫的吧。畫畫還能有多難?
02:18
And so what happened was that I started
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於是我開始畫畫
02:23
just becoming an editorial illustrator through, you know,
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我成為報章雜誌的插畫家，
02:26
sheer whatever, sheer ignorance.
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真的是，真的是誤入歧途
02:29
And we started a studio.
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我們成立了工作室
02:31
Well, Tibor really started the studio, called M&Co.
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應該說，Tibor(講者的丈夫)成立了工作室，命名為M&Co
02:33
And the premise of M&Co was, we don't know anything,
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在成立這個工作室之前，我們什麼都不懂
02:37
but that's all right, we're going to do it anyway.
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不過沒關係，我們還是勇往直前
02:39
And as a matter of fact, it's better not to know anything,
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事實上，一無所知反而比較好
02:41
because if you know too much, you're stymied.
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知道太多反而會讓你裹足不前
02:44
So, the premise in the studio was,
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所以這個工作室的初衷就是
02:47
there are no boundaries, there is no fear.
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不設限，不畏懼
02:50
And I -- and my full-time job, I landed the best job on Earth,
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我呢 -- 還有我的全職工作，我得到了全世界最棒的工作
02:53
was to daydream, and to actually come up with absurd ideas
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那就是繼續做夢，想些異想天開的點子
02:58
that -- fortunately, there were enough people there,
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幸好，也有很多人也像我一樣 --
03:00
and it was a team, it was a collective,
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我們組成一個團隊，大家集思廣益
03:02
it was not just me coming up with crazy ideas.
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而不只是我一個人想著那些怪誕的點子。
03:04
But the point was that I was there as myself, as a dreamer.
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但重點是，我是以我個人，一個夢想家的角色參與工作室
03:09
And so some of the things -- I mean, it was a long history of M&Co,
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所以有些事 -- 這其實是M&Co工作室的老歷史
03:12
and clearly we also needed to make some money,
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而當然我們也必須賺錢
03:16
so we decided we would create a series of products.
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我們決定設計一系列的產品
03:20
And some of the watches there,
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例如這些手錶
03:23
attempting to be beautiful and humorous --
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就是我們企圖讓設計兼具美感與樂趣 --
03:25
maybe not attempting, hopefully succeeding.
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或許也並不只是憑空妄想，而是期待真的發揮效果 --
03:28
That to be able to talk about content,
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才能思索設計的內涵是什麼
03:31
to break apart what you normally expect, to use humor and surprise,
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才能打破既有的框架，運用點滴的趣味與驚喜
03:35
elegance and humanity in your work was really important to us.
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成品本身的質感與人性，是我們非常重視的
03:40
It was a very high, it was a very impersonal time in design
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當時普遍的設計，是非常缺乏人味的
03:45
and we wanted to say, the content is what's important,
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我們想傳達的是，產品本身才是最重要的
03:49
not the package, not the wrapping.
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而非包在外面的盒子和包裝紙
03:51
You really have to be journalists, you have to be inventors,
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你必須成為一個抽絲剝繭的記者，一個突破創新的發明家
03:54
you have to use your imagination more importantly than anything.
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你必須全心發揮你的想像力，不顧一切
03:58
So, the good news is that I have a dog
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所以，好消息是，我有一隻狗
04:03
and, though I don't know if I believe in luck --
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雖然我不確定自己是否相信運氣 --
04:05
I don't know what I believe in, it's a very complicated question,
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我不知道自己究竟相信什麼，這問題很難解 --
04:07
but I do know that before I go away, I crank his tail seven times.
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但我的確知道，每次在我出遠門之前，我都會晃晃牠的尾巴七次
04:11
So, whenever he sees a suitcase in the house,
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所以牠看到家裡擺出了行李箱
04:13
because everybody's always, you know, leaving,
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因為家中每個人總是時不時的出遠門
04:16
they're always cranking this wonderful dog's tail,
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每個人也總是會在離開前晃晃牠可愛的尾巴
04:18
and he runs to the other room.
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於是牠就會跑進其他房間躲起來。
04:20
But I am able to make the transition from working for children and --
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我能自由穿梭、轉換角度，為兒童創作或 --
04:25
from working for adults to children, and back and forth,
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在為成人以及為兒童創作之間反覆轉換
04:28
because, you know, I can say that I'm immature,
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因為，我會認為那是因為，我是個很不成熟的人
04:30
and in a way, that's true.
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某種程度來說，這也是事實
04:33
I don't really -- I mean, I could tell you that I didn't understand,
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我並不 -- 我的意思是，我能篤定的告訴你，我無法聽懂 --
04:38
I'm not proud of it, but I didn't understand
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我並沒有因此沾沾自喜，但我無法聽懂
04:40
let's say 95 percent of the talks at this conference.
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這場論壇裡將近百分之95的演說
04:43
But I have been taking beautiful notes of drawings
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但在聽講時，我還是畫下美麗的筆記
04:45
and I have a gorgeous onion from Murray Gell-Mann's talk.
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我在聽Murray Gell-Mann(美國物理學家)的演講時，畫了一個絢麗的洋蔥
04:48
And I have a beautiful page of doodles from Jonathan Woodham's talk.
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在Jonathan Woodham(英國設計史學家)的演講，我畫了一整頁美麗的塗鴉
04:52
So, good things come out of, you know, incomprehension --
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所以，好事的降臨，總是出現在我們內心充滿問號的時刻 --
04:55
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
04:57
-- which I will do a painting of, and then it will end up in my work.
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-- 那些時刻會讓我想要創作，最後就成為我的作品
05:00
So, I'm open to the possibilities of not knowing
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所以，我對於自己的無知感到很自在
05:04
and finding out something new.
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也同時找到新鮮的靈感
05:06
So, in writing for children, it seems simple, and it is.
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為兒童創作好像是件很簡單的事，它確實是如此
05:11
You have to condense a story into 32 pages, usually.
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一般而言，你必須在32頁以內塞進一個故事
05:15
And what you have to do is, you really have to edit down to what you want to say.
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你往往需要從你原本想講的內容裡刪掉許多
05:18
And hopefully, you're not talking down to kids
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你也希望講故事的語氣不要顯得高高在上
05:21
and you're not talking in such a way that you,
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不要用這種說教的方式
05:23
you know, couldn't stand reading it after one time.
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讓人讀過一遍後就不肯再碰那本書
05:26
So, I hopefully am writing, you know,
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所以，我很希望自己寫的書
05:28
books that are good for children and for adults.
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能讓孩童或是成人有些收穫
05:30
But the painting reflects --
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但插畫觸發讀者內心投射的力量
05:32
I don't think differently for children than I do for adults.
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就我看來，對孩子或對大人並無不同
05:34
I try to use the same kind of imagination, the same kind of whimsy,
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我試著運用一樣的想像力，一樣的胡思亂想
05:37
the same kind of love of language.
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一樣充滿愛的語言
05:40
So, you know, and I have lots of wonderful-looking friends.
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所以-- 你們知道的，我有很多外貌姣好的朋友
05:44
This is Andrew Gatz, and he walked in through the door and I said,
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這位是Andrew Gatz，他那時正要從門口進來
05:46
"You! Sit down there." You know, I take lots of photos.
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「你，過來這邊坐好」然後我照了許多相片
05:49
And the Bertoia chair in the background is my favorite chair.
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背景中那張Harry Bertoia(義大利家具設計師)設計的椅子，是我最喜歡的椅子
05:52
So, I get to put in all of the things that I love.
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於是，我能夠把所有我熱愛的東西擺進畫框
05:55
Hopefully, a dialog between adults and children will happen on many different levels,
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希望在各種不同的理解層次，促成孩子和大人之間的對話
05:59
and hopefully different kinds of humor will evolve.
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希望擦撞出各種不同的趣味和火花
06:03
And the books are really journals of my life.
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這些書都像日記一樣，紀錄著我的生命
06:05
I never -- I don't like plots.
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我從不 -- 我不喜歡編劇情
06:07
I don't know what a plot means.
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也不懂何謂劇情
06:09
I can't stand the idea of anything that starts in the beginning,
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我無法忍受「任何事總要有個開頭」的想法
06:12
you know, beginning, middle and end. It really scares me,
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你知道的，起承轉合，這些真令我害怕
06:14
because my life is too random and too confused,
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因為我的生命充滿太多的變數與困惑
06:17
and I enjoy it that way.
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而我很享受這樣的日子
06:18
But anyway, so we were in Venice,
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總之，當時我在，我們當時在威尼斯
06:23
and this is our room. And I had this dream
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這是我們的房間，我做了這樣的夢
06:25
that I was wearing this fantastic green gown,
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夢中我身穿這件漂亮的綠色長禮服
06:27
and I was looking out the window,
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望向窗外
06:29
and it was really a beautiful thing.
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這真的很美
06:31
And so, I was able to put that into this story, which is an alphabet,
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如此美麗的畫面，我才得以將它放進這個字母的故事(講者以字母為主題創作《What Pete Ate from A to Z》)
06:34
and hopefully go on to something else.
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希望還會演變出其他的可能
06:37
The letter C had other things in it.
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字母C還會有其他的故事
06:39
I was fortunate also, to meet the man who's sitting on the bed,
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我也很幸運，能夠認識這位坐在床上的男子
06:42
though I gave him hair over here and he doesn't have hair.
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雖然畫中的他頭髮茂密，實際上他是個禿頭
06:45
Well, he has some hair but -- well, he used to have hair.
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恩...是有一些頭髮，不過...或者說，他的確「曾經」有頭髮
06:48
And with him, I was able to do a project that was really fantastic.
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因為有他，我才能進行這個很棒的計畫
06:53
I work for the New Yorker, and I do covers, and 9/11 happened
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我幫《紐約客》雜誌畫封面，接著911事件發生
06:58
and it was, you know, a complete and utter end of the world as we knew it.
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對當時的我們來說，那就是世界末日
07:03
And Rick and I were on our way to a party in the Bronx,
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當時，我和Rick (Meyerowitz) 正要前往參加位在布隆克斯區的派對
07:07
and somebody said Bronxistan,
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我們談話中就迸出「布隆克斯坦」(Bronxistan) 這個新詞 (「-斯坦」為中東語系的常用字尾)
07:09
and somebody said Ferreristan,
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還有「遠得要斯坦」(Fareerristan)
07:10
and we came up with this New Yorker cover,
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就這樣，我們創造出這期《紐約客》的封面
07:13
which we were able to -- we didn't know what we were doing.
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我們能...我們沒有意識到自己在創作的是什麼
07:15
We weren't trying to be funny, we weren't trying to be --
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我們無意要搞笑，我們也不是打算...
07:18
well, we were trying to be funny actually, that's not true.
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不，應該說我們本來只打算搞笑
07:20
We hoped we'd be funny, but we didn't know it would be a cover,
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我們希望它很有趣，卻沒預料到它會成為封面
07:23
and we didn't know that that image, at the moment that it happened,
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我們也沒預料到，當它登上封面時
07:27
would be something that would be so wonderful for a lot of people.
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會這麼受到大家的歡迎
07:31
And it really became the -- I don't know, you know,
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而且成為...我不確定該怎麼形容
07:33
it was one of those moments people started laughing at what was going on.
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人們開始能夠幽默看待這次的事件
07:36
And from, you know, Fattushis, to Taxistan to, you know,
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從「黎巴嫩沙拉區(Fattushis)」到拉瓜地亞機場旁的「小黃斯坦(Taxistan)」
07:41
for the Fashtoonks, Botoxia, Pashmina, Khlintunisia, you know,
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「臭氣沖天區(Fashtoonks)」、「肉毒桿菌區(Botoxia)」、「喀什米爾披肩區(Pashmina)」、「柯林頓辦公區(Khlintunesia)」等等
07:45
we were able to take the city
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我們將這座城市的各個地區
07:47
and make fun of this completely foreign, who are -- what's going on over here?
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用模擬中東語調的方式命名，幽默地傳達這個地區的特色是什麼
07:51
Who are these people? What are these tribes?
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住著什麼樣的人，屬於什麼樣的族裔
07:54
And David Remnick, who was really wonderful about it,
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David Remnick(美國作家、編輯)對這個概念也感到很有趣
07:57
had one problem. He didn't like Al Zheimers,
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但只有一點存疑：他覺得「阿茲海默區(Al Zheimers)」的名稱不洽當
08:02
because he thought it would insult people with Alzheimer's.
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他覺得，那可能會讓實際患有失智症(阿茲海默症)的人們感覺被冒犯
08:05
But you know, we said, "David, who's going to know?
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但我們跟他說：「他們有誰會記得這件事呢?」
08:07
They're not."
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他們不會記得的
08:09
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
08:11
So it stayed in, and it was, and, you know, it was a good thing.
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所以我們還是留下它，完成了一幅有趣的作品
08:19
You know, in the course of my life, I never know what's going to happen
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無論是在哪個人生階段，我永遠無法預期下一刻會發生什麼
08:22
and that's kind of the beauty part.
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這也是生命的美好之處
08:24
And we were on Cape Cod, a place, obviously, of great inspiration,
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我們曾在鱈魚角待過一陣子，那裡充滿啟發和想像
08:28
and I picked up this book, "The Elements of Style," at a yard sale.
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我在某次車庫二手拍賣找到了一本書，《英文寫作指南》
08:32
And I didn't -- and I'd never used it in school,
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我從沒在求學期間翻過它
08:34
because I was too busy writing poems, and flunking out,
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因為當時我忙著寫詩，還被退學
08:37
and I don't know what, sitting in cafes.
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坐在咖啡店裡無所事事
08:39
But I picked it up and I started reading it and I thought, this book is amazing.
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但當我拿起這本書開始閱讀，我領略到它的驚奇
08:42
I said, people should know about this book.
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我認為，每個人都該知道這本書才對
08:45
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
08:48
So I decided it needed a few -- it needed a lift, it needed a few illustrations.
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我覺得它可以用更好的方式呈現，它可以搭配一些插畫
08:51
And basically, I called the, you know, I convinced the White Estate,
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於是我打給作者E. B. White的代理人 ，並且試著說服他
08:55
and what an intersection of like, you know,
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電話的另一頭是
08:57
Polish Jew, you know, main WASP family. Here I am, saying,
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一位波蘭裔猶太人，來自白人精英家庭。於是我說
09:03
I'd like to do something to this book.
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我想為這本書加些什麼
09:05
And they said yes, and they left me completely alone,
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他們同意了，就完全讓我自由發揮
09:07
which was a gorgeous, wonderful thing.
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我難以形容當時有多興奮
09:10
And I took the examples that they gave,
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我將作者在書中所舉的例子畫成圖
09:14
and just did 56 paintings, basically.
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差不多是56幅
09:16
So, this is, I don't know if you can read this.
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而這幅..我不確定你們能不能讀得到字
09:18
"Well, Susan, this is a fine mess you are in."
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「蘇珊，妳站在一團混亂裡」
09:20
And when you're dealing with grammar,
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當你在學習文法時
09:22
which is, you know, incredibly dry,
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一般是很枯燥乏味的
09:24
E.B. White wrote such wonderful, whimsical -- and actually, Strunk --
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E.B. White用逗趣的方式...實際上是William Strunk, Jr.(另一位作者，White的老師)
09:28
and then you come to the rules and, you know,
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你認識到那些規則，你知道的
09:30
there are lots of grammar things. "Do you mind me asking a question?
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文法的規則多如牛毛：「你方便我問問題嗎？」(Do you mind me asking a question? 非正式文法)
09:33
Do you mind my asking a question?"
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「你方便讓我問個問題嗎？」(Do you mind my asking a question? 正確文法)
09:36
"Would, could, should, or would, should, could."
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「將要、能夠、應當」(Would, could, should)，或是「將要、應當、能夠」(would, should, could)
09:38
And "would" is Coco Chanel's lover, "should" is Edith Sitwell,
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would就像是可可·香奈兒的情人，should是伊迪絲·西特韋爾(Edith Sitwell，英國詩人)
09:42
and "could" is an August Sander subject.
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could則是奧古斯特．桑德(August Sander，德籍攝影師)的精神
09:45
And, "He noticed a large stain in the center of the rug."
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這幅是「他發現地毯中央的一個大污點」
09:47
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
09:49
So, there's a kind of British understatement, murder-mystery theme
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這是以英式的輕描淡寫，描述秘密謀殺案的現場
09:52
that I really love very much.
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我很喜歡這樣的場景
09:54
And then, "Be obscure clearly! Be wild of tongue in a way we can understand."
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「請清楚地表達那些晦澀的句子！在我們的理解範圍內，盡情放縱你的言語。」
09:58
E.B. White wrote us a number of rules,
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E.B. White為我們列的許多規則中
10:00
which can either paralyze you and make you loathe him
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某些很可能會冗贅、麻煩到讓你從此討厭這個作者
10:02
for the rest of time, or you can ignore them, which I do,
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或者你也可以像我一樣，忽視這些囉嗦的規則
10:07
or you can, I don't know what, you know, eat a sandwich.
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或是你也可以，我不知道，也許吃個三明治打發過去。
10:10
So, what I did when I was painting was I started singing,
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我的作法是，我一邊畫畫時，也一邊哼著歌
10:13
because I really adore singing,
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因為我真的很喜歡唱歌
10:15
and I think that music is the highest form of all art.
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我認為音樂是最崇高的藝術形式
10:18
So, I commissioned a wonderful composer, Nico Muhly,
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所以，我委託優秀的作曲家Nico Muhly幫忙
10:21
who wrote nine songs using the text,
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他用書中的文字，寫了九首歌
10:25
and we performed this fantastic evening of --
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我們在這個美妙的夜晚，演奏了...
10:29
he wrote music for both amateurs and professionals.
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他的音樂雅俗共賞
10:32
I played the clattering teacup and the slinky
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我敲擊茶杯和螺旋彈簧玩具(slinky)來演奏
10:34
in the main reading room of the New York Public Library,
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在紐約公共圖書館內最大的閱覽室
10:37
where you're supposed to be very, very quiet,
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那裡原本是個肅靜的空間
10:39
and it was a phenomenally wonderful event,
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卻成就了一場令人驚豔的演出
10:41
which we hopefully will do some more.
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讓我們期待能有更多的嘗試
10:45
Who knows? The New York TimesSelect, the op-ed page,
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誰預料得到呢? 紐約時報線上選集的論壇專頁
10:49
asked me to do a column, and they said, you can do whatever you want.
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邀請我設立一個專欄，並且毫不設限地任由我發揮
10:52
So, once a month for the last year,
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所以在過去的一年內，
10:53
I've been doing a column called "The Principles of Uncertainty,"
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我每月發表一次專欄，名為「測不準原理」
10:57
which, you know, I don't know who Heisenberg is,
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我並不了解海森堡(德國物理學家，提出測不準原理)的成就
10:59
but I know I can throw that around now. You know,
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但我知道我還是能夠借用它的名氣
11:01
it's the principles of uncertainty, so, you know.
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畢竟這是「測不準原理」，所以
11:04
I'm going to read quickly -- and probably I'm going to edit some,
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我要快速地讀過 -- 也許我會修改一些字句
11:07
because I don't have that much time left -- a few of the columns.
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因為時間所剩不多 --讀一部分我的專欄文章
11:10
And basically, I was so, you know, it was so amusing,
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基本上我一開始真的是...當時真的很好笑
11:13
because I said, "Well, how much space do I have?"
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因為那時我問「我的專欄有哪些限制?」
11:14
And they said, "Well, you know, it's the Internet."
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他們回答「你知道的，這專欄是在網路發布的」
11:16
And I said, "Yes, but how much space do I have?"
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我說「對，但是我的專欄究竟有哪些限制?」
11:18
And they said, "It's unlimited, it's unlimited."
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他們說「沒有限制，沒有限制。」
11:20
OK. So, the first one I was very timid, and I'll begin.
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好吧。第一篇我還相當畏縮，接著我就開始了。
11:25
"How can I tell you everything that is in my heart?
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「我要怎麼做，才能把心中所有的想法都告訴你們？
11:27
Impossible to begin. Enough. No. Begin with the hapless dodo."
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根本無法動筆。受夠了一再猶豫。我開始畫倒楣的渡渡鳥。
11:30
And I talk about the dodo, and how the dodo became extinct,
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我描寫關於牠的故事，以及牠是如何滅絕的，
11:34
and then I talk about Spinoza.
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然後我談到斯賓諾莎
11:36
"As the last dodo was dying, Spinoza was looking for a rational explanation
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「當世上最後一隻渡渡鳥死去的時候，斯賓諾莎正不斷尋找一個適用萬物的理性解釋
11:40
for everything, called eudaemonia.
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稱之為『理性主義』
11:42
And then he breathed his last, with loved ones around him,
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在他所愛的人們陪伴下，他嚥下最後一口氣，
11:45
and I know that he had chicken soup also, as his last meal."
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我還知道他生命的最後一餐，吃的是雞湯。」
11:47
I happen to know it for a fact.
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我是恰巧知道這件關於他臨終前的事。
11:49
And then he died, and there was no more Spinoza. Extinct.
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然後他就過世了，世上再也沒有另一個斯賓諾莎，絕種了。
11:53
And then, we don't have a stuffed Spinoza,
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我們沒有斯賓諾莎的標本，
11:55
but we do have a stuffed Pavlov's dog,
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但我們還有帕夫洛夫的實驗狗標本
11:57
and I visited him in the Museum of Hygiene in St. Petersburg, in Russia.
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我到俄國聖彼得堡的衛生博物館去找牠
12:01
And there he is, with this horrible electrical box on his rump
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牠就在那裡，臀部戴著可怕的通電盒子，
12:06
in this fantastic, decrepit palace.
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住在這座荒唐、衰敗的城堡裡。
12:10
"And I think it must have been a very, very dark day
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「我想，當布爾什維克(俄國工黨多數派)掌握政權時，
12:12
when the Bolsheviks arrived.
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那一天想必是徹底黑暗的。
12:13
Maybe amongst themselves they had a few good laughs,
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也許他們之中有些人有不錯的幽默感
12:15
but Stalin was a paranoid man, even more than my father."
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但是史達林是個激進的偏執狂，比我爸還激進。」
12:19
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
12:20
You don't even know.
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你們不會懂的。
12:21
"And decided his top people had to be extinctified."
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「他下令國內的資產階級應該要被處以「絕種」(extinctified)。」
12:26
Which I think I made up, which is a good thing.
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這個字好像是我自創的，還不賴。
12:28
And so, this is a chart of, you know, just a small chart,
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這是一幅表格...，你知道，這只是其中的一小部分
12:31
because the chart would go on forever of all the people that he killed.
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這幅表格會隨著他所殺害的人們，無止盡的延伸出去。
12:33
So, shot dead, smacked over the head, you know, thrown away.
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射殺，重擊頭部，然後丟棄。
12:39
"Nabokov's family fled Russia. How could the young Nabokov,
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「納博科夫(俄裔美國作家)舉家逃離俄國。還幼小的他
12:42
sitting innocently and elegantly in a red chair,
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純真、優雅地坐在紅色椅子上
12:44
leafing through a book and butterflies,
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翻過蝴蝶百科的書頁
12:46
imagine such displacement, such loss?"
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想像時空的落差，那種失落。」
12:50
And then I want to tell you that this is a map.
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我想告訴你們的是，這是一幅地圖
12:52
So, "My beautiful mother's family fled Russia as well.
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「我美麗的母親，從前也是舉家逃離俄國
12:56
Too many pogroms.
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那裡太多的屠殺。
12:58
Leaving the shack, the wild blueberry woods, the geese, the River Sluch,
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他們離開了小屋，離開了藍苺林，離開了鵝群，離開了那條名叫Sluch的河流
13:01
they went to Palestine and then America."
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他們搬到巴勒斯坦，然後再遷往美國。」
13:04
And my mother drew this map for me of the United States of America,
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然後，我的母親為我畫了這張美國地圖
13:06
and that is my DNA over here, because that person who I grew up with
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我的基因就是來自於這裡。對於這位我從小相依為命的女人而言
13:15
had no use for facts whatsoever.
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現實中的地理毫無意義。
13:17
Facts were actually banished from our home.
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她的地理，就是一張被家園放逐的地圖。
13:20
And so, if you see that Texas -- you know, Texas and California
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所以，當你找到地圖上的德州 -- 德州和加州
13:24
are under Canada, and that South Carolina is on top of North Carolina,
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是在加拿大下方，南卡羅萊那州則位在北卡羅萊那州的上方
13:27
this is the home that I grew up in, OK?
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這就是我從小生長的家，好嗎?
13:29
So, it's a miracle that I'm here today.
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所以，今天我竟然能站在這個台上，真是個奇蹟
13:31
But actually, it's not. It's actually a wonderful thing.
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但實際上並非如此，生長在這個家其實是很美好的
13:35
But then she says Tel Aviv and Lenin,
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但接著她寫到以色列的特拉維夫，還有列寧，
13:37
which is the town they came from, and, "Sorry, the rest unknown, thank you."
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那是她們來美國前所住的城市，並且說「很抱歉，除此之外我一無所知，謝謝。」
13:40
But in her lexicon, "sorry, the rest unknown, thank you" is
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在她的詞彙中，「抱歉，除此之外一無所知」的意思是
13:42
"sorry, the rest unknown, go to hell,"
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「抱歉其他我不知道，管它的」
13:44
because she couldn't care less.
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因為她一點都不在乎其他地方。
13:45
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
13:46
"The Impossibility of February"
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二月不可能發生的事
13:48
is that February's a really wretched month in New York
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在紐約，二月是個很憂鬱的月份
13:51
and the images for me conjure up these really awful things.
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我腦中的這個畫面，就幻化為這些嚇人的東西 --
13:54
Well, not so awful.
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嗯...也許也沒那麼可怕。
13:56
I received a box in the mail and it was wrapped with newspaper
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我在信箱收到這個用報紙包裹的盒子
13:59
and there was the picture of the man on the newspaper and he was dead.
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然後，這張圖是一個男人死在報紙上
14:03
And I say, "I hope he's not really dead,
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於是我寫說「我希望他並沒有真的死掉，
14:05
just enjoying a refreshing lie-down in the snow,
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只是在享受躺在雪地上的清爽
14:07
but the caption says he is dead."
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但標題寫說他已經死了。」
14:09
And actually, he was. I think he's dead, though I don't know,
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事實上，他真的死了。我猜他是死於...我不知道
14:12
maybe he's not dead.
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也許他根本沒死。
14:14
"And this woman leans over in anguish, not about that man,
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「這位女士痛苦地倚靠著，並不是因為那個死去的男人
14:16
but about all sad things. It happens quite often in February."
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而是因為所有的那些哀傷的事，常常發生在二月。」
14:21
There's consoling.
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這是關於慰問的圖。
14:23
This man is angry because somebody threw onions all over the staircase,
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這個男人感到很憤怒，因為有人在樓梯上灑滿了洋蔥
14:27
and basically -- you know, I guess onions are a theme here.
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而實際上 -- 我認為洋蔥應該是個主題 --
14:30
And he says, "It is impossible not to lie.
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於是他說「人不可能不說謊
14:32
It is February and not lying is impossible."
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現在是二月，不說謊是不可能的。」
14:34
And I really spend a lot of time wondering,
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我真的花了很多時間在思考
14:36
how much truth do we tell?
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我們到底講了多少實話？
14:38
What is it that we're actually -- what story are we actually telling?
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哪些是我們真的...實際上我們究竟在說什麼樣的故事呢?
14:41
How do we know when we are ourselves?
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我們怎麼知道，哪些時刻我們是真正的自己？
14:43
How do we actually know that these sentences coming out of our mouths
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我們怎麼確切知道，嘴裡講出的這些句子
14:46
are real stories, you know, are real sentences?
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是真實的故事，是真的敘述?
14:48
Or are they fake sentences that we think we ought to be saying?
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或是那只是我們認為我們應該要說的話?
14:51
I'm going to quickly go through this.
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我要很快地帶過去這一段
14:54
A quote by Bertrand Russell,
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伯特蘭·羅素曾說過
14:56
"All the labor of all the ages, all the devotion, all the inspiration,
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「所有勞動人力的壽命，所有的奉獻，所有的靈感，
15:00
all the noonday brightness of human genius
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所有宛如日正當中的人類才智
15:03
are destined to extinction.
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終究會走向滅絕。
15:05
So now, my friends, if that is true,
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所以現在，我的朋友，如果這是真的 --
15:07
and it is true, what is the point?"
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而且這也的確是 -- 那麼，重點是什麼?」
15:10
A complicated question.
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這是一個大哉問
15:11
And so, you know, I talk to my friends
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所以，我和我的朋友談論
15:14
and I go to plays where they're singing Russian songs.
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我去欣賞有演唱俄語歌曲的戲劇
15:17
Oh my God, you know what?
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我的天，你猜怎麼著?
15:19
Could we have -- no, we don't have time.
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我們可不可以...不，我們沒時間了
15:21
I taped my aunt. I taped my aunt singing a song in Russian from the --
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我錄下我阿姨的聲音，錄下她唱一首俄語歌曲，來自...
15:23
you know, could we have it for a second?
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我們能稍微播放一點點嗎?
15:26
Do you have that?
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你那邊有嗎?
15:28
(Music)
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(音樂)
15:47
OK. I taped my -- my aunt used to swim in the ocean
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好，我錄下我的...我阿姨之前常在海中游泳
15:50
every day of the year until she was about 85.
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天天去游，全年無休，一直持續到她85歲
15:57
So -- and that's a song about how everybody's miserable
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這首歌是在說，每個人都過得如何地悲慘
15:59
because, you know, we're from Russia.
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因為，我們是從俄國來的
16:01
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
16:02
I went to visit Kitty Carlisle Hart, and she is 96,
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我去拜訪吉蒂•卡莉斯爾•哈特(Kitty Carlisle Hart，美國歌手、演員)，她已經96歲
16:04
and when I brought her a copy of "The Elements of Style,"
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當我給她一本《英文寫作指南》時
16:07
she said she would treasure it.
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她說她會好好珍藏它
16:09
And then I said -- oh, and she was talking about Moss Hart, and I said,
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我說，喔，然後她談到她的丈夫Moss Hart(美國劇作家，1961年逝)，我說
16:11
"When you met him, you knew it was him."
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「當妳遇到他時，妳知道就是他了(you knew it was "him")」
16:13
And she said, "I knew it was he."
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她說「我知道就是他了(I knew it was "he")」
16:14
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
16:17
So, I was the one who should have kept the book, but it was a really wonderful moment.
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所以，我應該把書留著的，不過當時還是很愉快
16:20
And she dated George Gershwin, so, you know, get out.
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她婚前曾和喬治·蓋希文交往的事情已經為人所知
16:23
Gershwin died at the age of 38.
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喬治·蓋希文在38歲時去世
16:26
He's buried in the same cemetery as my husband.
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他和我丈夫葬在同一個墓園(Westchester Hills Cemetery)
16:29
I don't want to talk about that now.
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我現在不打算談這個
16:31
I do want to talk -- the absolute icing on this cemetery cake
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我想說的是...真正道地的「墓園蛋糕」的糖霜
16:33
is the Barricini family mausoleum nearby.
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是旁邊Barricini家族(知名糖果商)墓園所製作的
16:36
I think the Barricini family should open a store there and sell chocolate.
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我認為他們家應該在那裡開間店販賣招牌巧克力
16:39
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
16:40
And I would like to run it for them.
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我很樂意去幫他們經營的
16:41
And I went to visit Louise Bourgeoise,
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我去拜訪露易絲‧布爾喬亞(Louise Bourgeoise，法裔美國藝術家)
16:43
who's also still working, and I looked at her sink,
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她還持續在創作，我看了她的洗手台
16:45
which is really amazing, and left.
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那真的很令人吃驚
16:47
And then I photograph and do a painting of a sofa on the street.
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我對路旁的沙發照了張相，然後把這個畫面畫下
16:50
And a woman who lives on our street, Lolita.
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一個與我們住在同一條街的女人，洛莉塔(Lolita)
16:53
And then I go and have some tea.
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我去喝了下午茶
16:55
And then my Aunt Frances dies, and before she died,
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我的阿姨Frances過世，在她臨終前
16:58
she tried to pay with Sweet'N Low packets for her bagel.
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她打算用Sweet 'n Low代糖糖果的包裝紙，拿去買貝果
17:01
(Laughter)
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(笑聲)
17:03
And I wonder what the point is and then I know, and I see
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我想知道，真正的重點究竟是什麼，然後我發現
17:05
that Hy Meyerowitz, Rick Meyerowitz's father,
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Hy Meyerowitz，Rick Meyerowitz的父親
17:07
a dry-cleaning supply salesman from the Bronx,
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這位布朗克斯的衣物乾洗劑推銷員
17:09
won the Charlie Chaplin look-alike contest in 1931.
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贏得了1931年卓別林模仿賽的冠軍
17:14
That's actually Hy.
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這就是他
17:16
And I look at a beautiful bowl of fruit,
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我看著一只漂亮的容器裝著水果
17:19
and I look at a dress that I sewed for friends of mine.
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我看著一件我為朋友繡上裝飾的洋裝
17:22
And it says, "Ich habe genug," which is a Bach cantata,
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寫著「Ich habe genug」，這是一首巴赫的清唱劇
17:24
which I once thought meant "I've had it, I can't take it anymore,
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我曾經將它解讀為，「我已經有了，夠了
17:27
give me a break," but I was wrong.
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饒了我吧!」但是我錯了
17:30
It means "I have enough." And that is utterly true.
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它的意思是，「我擁有的夠多了」-- 而這點完全正確
17:33
I happen to be alive, end of discussion. Thank you.
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我何其有幸能夠擁有生命，今天的演講到此結束，謝謝大家。
17:35
(Applause)
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(掌聲)
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Maira Kalman - Illustrator, authorMaira Kalman's wise, witty drawings have appeared on numberless New Yorker covers, in a dozen children's books, and throughout the pages of the Elements of Style. Her latest book, The Principles of Uncertainty, is the result of a year-long illustrated blog she kept for the New York Times.
Why you should listen
Children know Maira Kalman for her series of Max storybooks, adults for her New Yorker covers and the gotta-have-it illustrated version of the Elements of Style -- simple proof that her sensibility blends a childlike delight with a grownup's wry take on the world.
With her husband, the legendary designer and art director Tibor Kalman, Maira spent several decades designing objets and assembling books like (un)FASHION. But after Tibor's untimely death in 1999, Maira herself became a cultural force. Her colorful, faux-naif illustrations -- and her very perspective -- tap a desire in all of us to look at the world the way she does.
Her latest book, The Principles of Uncertainty, is perhaps the most complete expression of Maira's worldview. Based on a monthly blog she kept for the New York Times website for one year, it is filled with carefully observed moments and briskly captured thoughts, an omnivore's view of life in the modern world.
Maira Kalman | Speaker | TED.com