TEDxSydney
Megan Washington: Why I live in mortal dread of public speaking
Megan Washington: Kenapa saya takut berbicara di depan umum
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Megan Washington adalah salah seorang penyanyi/penulis lagu populer di Australia, dan ia seorang yang gagap sejak kecil. Di dalam ceramah yang intim dan penuh kesan ini, ia mengungkapkan bagaimana caranya mengatasi kegagapannya—dengan menghindari hurut-huruf kombinasi "st" sampai mengganti kata-katanya disaat-saat terakhir, dan menyanyikannya.
Megan Washington - Musician
Megan Washington has won two ARIA Awards, the Australian equivalent of the Grammys. A popular singer/songwriter, she has recently come clean with a secret—that she has a speech impediment. Full bio
Megan Washington has won two ARIA Awards, the Australian equivalent of the Grammys. A popular singer/songwriter, she has recently come clean with a secret—that she has a speech impediment. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:12
I didn't know when I agreed to do this
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Ketika saya setuju tampil di sini,
00:16
whether I was expected to talk or to sing.
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saya tidak tahu apakah saya
diminta untuk berbicara atau menyanyi.
Tapi ketika saya diberitahu
00:22
But when I was told that the topic was language,
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topiknya adalah tentang bahasa,
00:27
I felt that I had to speak about something for a moment.
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saya merasa saya harus berbicara
untuk beberapa saat.
untuk beberapa saat.
00:32
I have a problem.
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Saya punya masalah.
00:36
It's not the worst thing in the world.
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Ini bukan masalah terburuk di dunia.
00:38
I'm fine.
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Saya baik-baik saja.
00:39
I'm not on fire.
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Saya tidak sedang diujung tanduk.
00:41
I know that other people in the world
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Saya tahu bahwa banyak orang lain di dunia
00:43
have far worse things to deal with,
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punya masalah-masalah yang lebih berat,
00:47
but for me, language and music are
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tapi bagi saya, bahasa dan musik
00:53
inextricably linked through this one thing.
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berhubungan erat dengan masalah ini.
00:57
And the thing is that I have a stutter.
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Masalahnya, saya seorang yang gagap.
01:05
It might seem curious given that I spend
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Mungkin ini terdengar aneh karena
01:08
a lot of my life on the stage.
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saya sering berada di atas panggung.
01:11
One would assume that I'm comfortable
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Orang lain akan mengira bahwa saya nyaman
01:14
in the public sphere and comfortable here,
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berada dalam sorotan publik dan
merasa nyaman berbicara
kepada Anda semua di sini.
kepada Anda semua di sini.
01:17
speaking to you guys.
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01:19
But the truth is that I've spent
my life up until this point
my life up until this point
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Kenyataannya, sepanjang hidup saya
sampai sekarang, termasuk saat ini,
01:24
and including this point, living in mortal dread
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saya selalu merasa takut
01:28
of public speaking.
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setiap kali saya berbicara di depan umum.
01:32
Public singing, whole different thing. (Laughter)
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Tapi lain halnya dengan
menyanyi di depan umum. (Tawa)
01:36
But we'll get to that in a moment.
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Nanti saya akan berbicara tentang itu.
01:40
I've never really talked about it before so explicitly.
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Saya tidak pernah membicarakannya
secara terbuka sebelumnya.
Saya rasa ini karena saya selalu berharap
01:46
I think that that's because I've always lived in hope
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01:48
that when I was a grown-up,
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bahwa ketika saya besar nanti,
01:51
I wouldn't have one.
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masalah ini akan hilang.
01:57
I sort of lived with this idea that when I'm grown,
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Saya tumbuh dengan pemikiran semacam ini.
Kalau saya besar nanti,
02:00
I'll have learned to speak French,
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saya akan belajar bahasa Perancis,
02:03
and when I'm grown, I'll learn
how to manage my money,
how to manage my money,
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dan saya akan belajar
mengatur keuangan saya,
mengatur keuangan saya,
02:07
and when I'm grown, I won't have a stutter,
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saya tidak akan gagap lagi
02:09
and then I'll be able to public speak
and maybe be the prime minister
and maybe be the prime minister
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dan saya dapat berbicara di depan umum,
dan mungkin menjadi perdana menteri
02:11
and anything's possible and, you know.
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dan segalanya mungkin.
02:15
(Laughter)
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(Tawa)
02:18
So I can talk about it now
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Saya bisa membicarakannya sekarang
02:21
because I've reached this point, where —
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karena saya telah mencapai
titik dimana —
02:25
I mean, I'm 28.
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yah, saya sudah berusia 28 tahun.
02:29
I'm pretty sure that I'm grown now.
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Saya yakin saya sudah cukup dewasa.
02:31
(Laughter)
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(Tawa)
02:33
And I'm an adult woman
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Dan saya seorang wanita dewasa
02:35
who spends her life as a performer,
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yang menghabiskan hidupnya
di atas panggung,
02:39
with a speech impediment.
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dengan kegagapan.
02:42
So, I might as well come clean about it.
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Jadi, sekalian saja saya bicara
terus terang.
terus terang.
02:46
There are some interesting
angles to having a stutter.
angles to having a stutter.
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Ada yang menarik dari kegagapan saya.
02:50
For me, the worst thing that can happen
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Bagi saya,
hal terburuk yang mungkin terjadi
hal terburuk yang mungkin terjadi
02:54
is meeting another stutterer.
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adalah bertemu dengan orang gagap lainnya.
02:57
(Laughter)
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(Tawa)
03:00
This happened to me in Hamburg, when
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Ini terjadi kepada saya di Hamburg,
03:03
this guy, we met and he said,
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ketika itu saya bertemu seorang pria
03:05
"Hello, m-m-m-my name is Joe,"
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dan dia berkata,
"Halo, n-n-n-nama saya Joe,"
"Halo, n-n-n-nama saya Joe,"
03:09
and I said, "Oh, hello, m-m-m-my name is Meg."
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dan saya berkata, "Oh, halo,
n-n-n-nama saya Meg."
03:13
Imagine my horror when I realized
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Bayangkan betapa saya kaget
ketika menyadari
ketika menyadari
03:16
he thought I was making fun of him.
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dia pikir saya mengolok-oloknya.
03:18
(Laughter)
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(Tawa)
03:24
People think I'm drunk all the time.
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Orang-orang berpikir saya selalu mabuk.
03:29
(Laughter)
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(Tawa)
03:32
People think that I've forgotten their name
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Orang-orang berpikir saya lupa nama mereka
03:36
when I hesitate before saying it.
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karena saya terbata-bata.
03:40
And it is a very weird thing, because
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Dan memang aneh,
03:43
proper nouns are the worst.
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karena kata benda adalah yang
paling sulit.
paling sulit.
Kalau saya akan menggunakan kata
03:47
If I'm going to use the word
"Wednesday" in a sentence,
"Wednesday" in a sentence,
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"Rabu" dalam sebuah kalimat,
03:51
and I'm coming up to the word,
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dan hendak mengucapkan kata tersebut,
03:54
and I can feel that I'm going to stutter or something,
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dan saya merasa saya akan terbata-bata,
03:57
I can change the word to "tomorrow,"
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saya bisa menggantinya dengan "besok,"
04:00
or "the day after Tuesday,"
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atau "sehari setelah hari Selasa,"
04:02
or something else.
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atau semacamnya.
04:04
It's clunky, but you can get away with it,
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Kedengarannya kikuk,
tapi saya bisa menghindarinya
04:09
because over time I've developed this
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karena dari waktu ke waktu saya
04:12
loophole method of using speech
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menyelamatkan diri dengan
berbicara seperti ini
04:16
where right at the last minute you
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dimana di saat-saat terakhir, saya
04:19
change the thing and you trick your brain.
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mengganti satu dua kata
dan mengelabui otak sendiri.
04:24
But with people's names, you can't change them.
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Tapi saya tak bisa mengganti nama orang.
04:27
(Laughter)
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(Tawa)
04:30
When I was singing a lot of jazz,
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Ketika saya harus menyanyikan
banyak lagu jazz,
04:33
I worked a lot with a pianist whose name was Steve.
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saya sering berkolaborasi
dengan seorang pianis bernama Steve.
04:39
As you can probably gather,
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Anda mungkin sudah bisa menebak.
04:41
S's and T's, together or independently,
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Huruf S dan T, baik berjejeran
ataupun berdiri sendiri
04:45
are my kryptonite.
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merupakan kelemahan saya.
04:49
But I would have to introduce the band
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Tapi saya harus memperkenalkan
anggota band saat jeda,
04:51
over this rolling vamp,
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dan ketika giliran Steve,
04:54
and when I got around to Steve,
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04:57
I'd often find myself stuck on the "St."
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saya sering kesulitan menyebut "St."
05:03
And it was a bit awkward and uncomfortable
and it totally kills the vibe.
and it totally kills the vibe.
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Suasananya menjadi agak cangung
dan tidak nyaman,
dan tidak nyaman,
dan merusak mood yang ada.
Jadi setelah beberapa kali,
05:08
So after a few instances of this,
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05:11
Steve happily became "Seve,"
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saya menyebut Steve "Seve,"
05:16
and we got through it that way. (Laughter)
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dan begitulah kami mengatasinya. (Tawa)
05:21
I've had a lot of therapy,
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Saya sudah melalui banyak sesi terapi,
05:24
and a common form of treatment is to use
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dan pengobatan yang biasa digunakan
05:26
this technique that's called smooth speech,
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adalah sebuah cara yang dinamakan
berpidato mulus,
05:31
which is where you almost
sing everything that you say.
sing everything that you say.
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dimana Anda hampir selalu
menyanyikan setiap ucapan Anda.
menyanyikan setiap ucapan Anda.
05:36
You kind of join everything together in this
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Anda menggabungkan semua yang ada dalam
05:39
very singsong, kindergarten teacher way,
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metode menyanyi ini,
seperti halnya guru TK mengajar,
seperti halnya guru TK mengajar,
05:43
and it makes you sound very serene,
like you've had lots of Valium,
like you've had lots of Valium,
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dan ini sangat menenangkan,
seperti habis minum banyak Valium,
05:47
and everything is calm. (Laughter)
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dan semuanya begitu tenang. (Tawa)
05:51
That's not actually me.
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Sebenarnya saya tidak seperti itu.
05:54
And I do use that. I do.
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Namun saya melakukannya,
05:57
I use it when I have to be on panel shows,
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ketika berada di acara temu bicara,
atau wawancara di radio,
06:04
or when I have to do radio interviews,
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ketika saya harus tampil di depan publik
06:07
when the economy of airtime is paramount.
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demi uang.
06:12
(Laughter)
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(Tawa)
06:15
I get through it that way for my job.
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Ini siasat saya dalam bekerja.
06:20
But as an artist who feels that their work
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Tapi sebagai artis
yang merasa pekerjaannya
06:22
is based solely on a platform of honesty
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berdasarkan semata-mata atas kejujuran
06:28
and being real,
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dari diri kita yang sebenarnya,
06:32
that feels often like cheating.
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saya merasa seperti telah berbuat curang.
06:36
Which is why before I sing, I wanted to tell you
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Karenanya, sebelum saya bernyanyi,
saya ingin memberitahu
06:39
what singing means to me.
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apa arti menyanyi bagi saya.
06:43
It's more than making nice sounds,
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Menyanyi lebih dari sekadar
menciptakan melodi yang indah,
dan lebih dari sekedar
06:47
and it's more than making nice songs.
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membuat lagu yang bagus.
Lebih dari sekadar dikenal dan dimengerti.
06:52
It's more than feeling known, or understood.
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06:58
It's more than making you feel the things that I feel.
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Menyanyi berarti membuat Anda
merasakan apa yang saya rasa.
Ini bukanlah mengenai mitologi,
07:04
It's not about mythology,
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07:07
or mythologizing myself to you.
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atau memitologikan diri saya kepada Anda.
07:12
Somehow, through some miraculous
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Seakan-akan,
melalui keajaiban fungsi otak,
07:17
synaptic function of the human brain,
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07:22
it's impossible to stutter when you sing.
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kegagapan yang ada hilang.
07:27
And when I was younger,
that was a method of treatment
that was a method of treatment
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Ketika saya kecil, metode ini berhasil,
07:31
that worked very well for me,
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07:33
singing, so I did it a lot.
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Bernyanyi. Jadi saya sering bernyanyi.
07:39
And that's why I'm here today.
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Dan itulah mengapa saya di sini hari ini.
07:43
(Applause)
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(Tepuk tangan)
07:48
Thank you.
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Terima kasih.
07:54
Singing for me is sweet relief.
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Menyanyi semacam suatu pelampiasan
bagi saya,
karena itulah satu-satunya masa
07:58
It is the only time when I feel fluent.
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dimana saya merasa sangat fasih,
08:07
It is the only time when what comes out of my mouth
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satu-satunya saat dimana
apa yang keluar dari mulut saya
08:10
is comprehensively exactly what I intended.
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adalah sesuatu
yang benar-benar saya maksud.
(Tawa)
08:13
(Laughter)
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08:15
So I know that this is a TED Talk,
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Saya tahu ini acara ceramah,
08:18
but now i'm going to TED sing.
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tapi sekarang saya mau bernyanyi.
Lagu ini saya gubah tahun lalu.
08:22
This is a song that I wrote last year.
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08:23
Thank you very much. Thank you.
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Terima kasih banyak. Terima kasih.
08:26
(Applause)
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(Tepuk tangan)
08:39
(Piano)
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(Piano)
08:54
♪ I would be a beauty ♪
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♪ I would be a beauty ♪
(Aku ingin menjadi cantik)
(Aku ingin menjadi cantik)
08:58
♪ but my nose ♪
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♪ but my nose ♪
(tapi hidungku)
(tapi hidungku)
09:02
♪ is slightly too big ♪
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♪ is slightly too big ♪
(terlalu besar)
(terlalu besar)
09:05
♪ for my face ♪
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♪ for my face ♪
(di wajahku)
(di wajahku)
09:09
♪ And I would be a dreamer ♪
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♪ And I would be a dreamer ♪
(dan aku ingin bermimpi)
(dan aku ingin bermimpi)
09:13
♪ but my dream ♪
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♪ but my dream ♪
(tapi mimpiku)
(tapi mimpiku)
09:16
♪ is slightly too big ♪
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♪ is slightly too big ♪
(terlampau besar)
(terlampau besar)
09:20
♪ for this space ♪
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♪ for this space ♪
(untuk tempat ini)
(untuk tempat ini)
09:23
♪ And I would be an angel ♪
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♪ And I would be an angel ♪
(dan aku ingin menjadi malaikat)
(dan aku ingin menjadi malaikat)
09:27
♪ but my halo ♪
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♪ but my halo ♪
(tapi lingkaran cahayaku)
(tapi lingkaran cahayaku)
09:31
♪ it pales in the glow ♪
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♪ it pales in the glow ♪
(terlihat pucat di hadapan)
(terlihat pucat di hadapan)
09:34
♪ of your grace ♪
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♪ of your grace ♪
(sinar anugerahmu)
(sinar anugerahmu)
09:38
♪ And I would be a joker ♪
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♪ And I would be a joker ♪
(Dan aku ingin menjadi Joker)
(Dan aku ingin menjadi Joker)
09:42
♪ but that card looks silly when you play ♪
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♪ but that card looks silly ♪
(tapi kartu itu terlihat konyol)
(tapi kartu itu terlihat konyol)
♪ when you play ♪
(ketika kamu memainkan)
(ketika kamu memainkan)
♪ your ace ♪
(kartu As-mu)
(kartu As-mu)
09:50
♪ your ace ♪
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10:07
♪ I'd like to know ♪
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♪ I'd like to know ♪
(Aku ingin tahu)
(Aku ingin tahu)
10:11
♪ Are there stars in hell? ♪
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♪ Are there stars in hell ♪
(Apakah ada bintang di neraka)
(Apakah ada bintang di neraka)
10:15
♪ And I'd like to know ♪
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♪ And I'd like to know ♪
(Dan aku ingin tahu)
(Dan aku ingin tahu)
10:18
♪ know if you can tell ♪
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♪ know if you can tell ♪
(apakah kamu tahu)
(apakah kamu tahu)
10:22
♪ that you make me lose everything I know ♪
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♪ that you make me lose ♪
(bahwa kamu membuatku)
(bahwa kamu membuatku)
♪ everything I know ♪
(kehilangan semuanya)
(kehilangan semuanya)
10:29
♪ That I cannot choose to or not let go ♪
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♪ That I cannot choose ♪
(dan aku tidak bisa memutuskan)
(dan aku tidak bisa memutuskan)
♪ to or not let go ♪
(untuk melepaskan atau tidak)
(untuk melepaskan atau tidak)
10:50
♪ And I'd stay forever ♪
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♪ And I'd stay forever ♪
(Dan aku ingin tinggal selamanya)
(Dan aku ingin tinggal selamanya)
10:54
♪ but my home ♪
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♪ but my home ♪
(tapi rumahku)
(tapi rumahku)
10:57
♪ is slightly too far ♪
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♪ is slightly too far ♪
(terlalu jauh)
(terlalu jauh)
11:01
♪ from this place ♪
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♪ from this place ♪
(dari sini)
(dari sini)
11:03
♪ And I swear I tried to ♪
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♪ And I swear I tried to ♪
(Dan sungguh, aku mencoba untuk)
(Dan sungguh, aku mencoba untuk)
11:08
♪ slow it down ♪
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♪ slow it down ♪
(berjalan lebih pelan)
(berjalan lebih pelan)
11:11
♪ when I am walking at your pace ♪
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♪ when I am walking at your pace ♪
(mengikuti langkahmu)
(mengikuti langkahmu)
11:18
♪ But all I could think ♪
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♪ But all I could think ♪
(Tapi yang kupikirkan)
(Tapi yang kupikirkan)
11:21
♪ idling through the cities ♪
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♪ idling through the cities ♪
(selagi melewati kota)
(selagi melewati kota)
11:26
♪ do I look pretty in the rain? ♪
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7169
♪ do I look pretty
(apakah aku terlihat cantik)
(apakah aku terlihat cantik)
♪ in the rain ♪
(di tengah hujan)
(di tengah hujan)
♪ And I don't know how someone ♪
(Dan entah bagaimana seseorang)
(Dan entah bagaimana seseorang)
11:33
♪ And I don't know how someone ♪
164
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3425
11:37
♪ quite so lovely ♪
165
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3523
♪ quite so lovely ♪
(yang cukup menarik)
(yang cukup menarik)
11:40
♪ makes me feel ugly ♪
166
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5658
♪ makes me feel ugly ♪
(membuatku merasa jelek)
(membuatku merasa jelek)
11:46
♪ So much shame ♪
167
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3074
♪ So much shame ♪
(Aku sangat malu)
(Aku sangat malu)
11:55
♪ And I'd like to know ♪
168
703595
3701
♪ And I'd like to know ♪
(Dan aku ingin tahu)
(Dan aku ingin tahu)
11:59
♪ Are there stars in hell? ♪
169
707296
3556
♪ Are there stars in hell ♪
(Apakah ada bintang di neraka)
(Apakah ada bintang di neraka)
12:02
♪ And I'd like to know ♪
170
710852
3772
♪ And I'd like to know ♪
(Dan aku ingin tahu)
(Dan aku ingin tahu)
12:06
♪ know if you can tell ♪
171
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3658
♪ know if you can tell ♪
(apakah kamu tahu)
(apakah kamu tahu)
12:10
♪ that you make me lose everything I know ♪
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7177
♪ that you make me lose ♪
(bahwa kamu membuatku)
(bahwa kamu membuatku)
♪ everything I know ♪
( kehilangan segalanya)
( kehilangan segalanya)
12:17
♪ that I cannot choose to or not let go ♪
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6548
♪ that I cannot choose ♪
(dan aku tidak bisa memutuskan)
(dan aku tidak bisa memutuskan)
♪ to or not let go ♪
(untuk melepaskan atau tidak)
(untuk melepaskan atau tidak)
Terima kasih banyak. (Tepuk tangan)
12:52
Thank you very much. (Applause)
174
760620
4441
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Megan Washington - MusicianMegan Washington has won two ARIA Awards, the Australian equivalent of the Grammys. A popular singer/songwriter, she has recently come clean with a secret—that she has a speech impediment.
Why you should listen
The lyrics of Megan Washington’s songs have a beautiful, confessional tone: she sings about heartbreak, insecurity, rage, you name it. But there is one thing that Washington avoided sharing publicly before stepping on the stage of TEDxSydney 2014: that she has a stutter.
One of Australia’s most promising singer/songwriters, Megan Washington won two ARIA Awards in 2010 for “Best Female Artist” and “Breakthrough Artist” following the release of her album, I Believe You Liar. The album went platinum, and she followed it up in 2012 with Insomnia. Her latest album, There There, was be released on September 12, 2014.
Prior to going solo, Washington played jazz piano with various acts and founded a band called Washington, borrowing her last name. After her breakthrough solo album, she served as a mentor on Australia’s version of The Voice and also spoke on music panels on the show Spicks and Specks, using a method called "smooth speech" to overcome her stuttering on-air. Washington's songs have also appeared in TV shows Girls and Boardwalk Empire.
Megan Washington | Speaker | TED.com