TEDxSydney
Gill Hicks: I survived a terrorist attack. Here's what I learned
Gill Hicks: Aš išgyvenau teroristo ataką. Štai ko išmokau.
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Gill Hicks istorija yra kupina gailestingumo ir žmogiškumo, kylanti iš chaoso ir neapykantos pelenų. Išgyvenusi teroristo sprogdinimus 2005 m. liepos 7-ąją Londone ji dalinasi savo istorija apie tos dienos įvykius – taip pat ir giliomis pamokomis, kurias patyrė mokydamasi gyventi toliau.
Gill Hicks - Survivor and activist
Gill Hicks has dedicated her life to being an advocate for peace. Full bio
Gill Hicks has dedicated her life to being an advocate for peace. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:12
I could never have imagined
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Niekada neįsivaizdavau,
00:15
that a 19-year-old suicide bomber
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kad 19-metis savižudis sprogdintojas
00:19
would actually teach me a valuable lesson.
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suteiks man vertingą pamoką.
00:24
But he did.
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Bet jis tą padarė.
00:26
He taught me to never presume anything
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Jis išmokė mane niekada nespręsti
iš anksto
iš anksto
00:31
about anyone you don't know.
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apie bet kurį man nepažįstamą žmogų.
00:36
On a Thursday morning in July 2005,
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Vieną 2005 m. liepos ketvirtadienį
00:40
the bomber and I, unknowingly,
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sprogdintojas ir aš, to nežinodami
00:43
boarded the same train carriage
at the same time,
at the same time,
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įlipome į tą patį traukinio vagoną
tuo pačiu metu,
tuo pačiu metu,
00:48
standing, apparently, just feet apart.
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ir stovėjome praktiškai šalia vienas kito.
00:54
I didn't see him.
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Aš jo nemačiau.
00:56
Actually, I didn't see anyone.
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Iš tiesų, nemačiau nė vieno žmogaus.
00:58
You know not to look
at anyone on the Tube,
at anyone on the Tube,
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Žinote, kad nedera žiūrėti į kitus metro,
01:00
but I guess he saw me.
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bet, manau, jis matė mane.
01:04
I guess he looked at all of us,
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Spėju, jis pažiūrėjo į mus visus,
01:08
as his hand hovered
over the detonation switch.
over the detonation switch.
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kai jo ranka pakibo virš
detonatoriaus jungiklio.
detonatoriaus jungiklio.
01:14
I've often wondered: What was he thinking?
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Aš dažnai svarsčiau: ką jis mąstė?
01:18
Especially in those final seconds.
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Ypač tomis paskutinėmis sekundėmis.
01:24
I know it wasn't personal.
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Žinau, tai nebuvo asmeniška.
01:26
He didn't set out to kill
or maim me, Gill Hicks.
or maim me, Gill Hicks.
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Jis nesiekė nužudyti ar suluošinti mane,
Gill Hicks.
Gill Hicks.
01:31
I mean -- he didn't know me.
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Tai yra – jis nepažinojo manęs.
01:33
No.
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Ne.
01:35
Instead, he gave me
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Užtat jis man uždėjo
01:38
an unwarranted and an unwanted label.
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nepagrįstą ir nenorimą etiketę.
01:44
I had become the enemy.
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Tapau priešu.
01:49
To him, I was the "other,"
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Jam aš buvau „kita“,
01:52
the "them," as opposed to "us."
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„jie“ kaip priešingybė „mes“.
01:57
The label "enemy" allowed him
to dehumanize us.
to dehumanize us.
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Etiketė „priešas“ leido jam
mus nužmoginti.
mus nužmoginti.
02:03
It allowed him to push that button.
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Tai leido jam paspausti mygtuką.
02:07
And he wasn't selective.
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Ir jis nebuvo išrankus.
02:10
Twenty-six precious lives were taken
in my carriage alone,
in my carriage alone,
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Vien mano vagone buvo atimtos
26 brangios gyvybės,
26 brangios gyvybės,
02:17
and I was almost one of them.
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ir aš buvau beveik viena jų.
02:20
In the time it takes to draw a breath,
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Per akimirką, kiek trunka įkvėpti,
02:23
we were plunged into a darkness so immense
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mes atsidūrėme tokioje begalinėje tamsoje,
02:27
that it was almost tangible;
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kad ji buvo beveik apčiuopiama;
02:29
what I imagine wading
through tar might be like.
through tar might be like.
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tarsi bristum per degutą.
02:35
We didn't know we were the enemy.
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Mes nežinojome, kad buvome priešai.
02:38
We were just a bunch of commuters
who, minutes earlier,
who, minutes earlier,
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Tebuvome grupelė keliaujančių į darbą,
kurie prieš minutę
kurie prieš minutę
02:42
had followed the Tube etiquette:
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laikėsi metro etiketo:
02:44
no direct eye contact,
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jokio akių kontakto,
02:47
no talking
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jokio kalbėjimo
02:48
and absolutely no conversation.
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ir visiškai jokių pokalbių.
02:53
But in the lifting of the darkness,
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Bet kai tamsa ėmė sklaidytis
02:57
we were reaching out.
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mes atsigręžėme vieni į kitus.
03:00
We were helping each other.
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Mes vieni kitus gelbėjome.
03:02
We were calling out our names,
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Mes šaukėme savo vardus,
03:05
a little bit like a roll call,
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truputį kaip per pamokos pradžią,
03:08
waiting for responses.
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laukdami atsakymų.
03:12
"I'm Gill. I'm here.
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„Aš Gill. Aš čia.
03:17
I'm alive.
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Aš gyva.
03:20
OK."
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Gerai.“
03:23
"I'm Gill.
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„Aš Gill.
03:25
Here.
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Čia.
03:28
Alive.
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Gyva.
03:31
OK."
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Gerai.“
03:35
I didn't know Alison.
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Aš nepažinojau Alison.
03:38
But I listened for her check-ins
every few minutes.
every few minutes.
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Bet klausiausi jos šūksnių
kas kelias minutes.
kas kelias minutes.
03:43
I didn't know Richard.
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Aš nepažinojau Richard.
03:45
But it mattered to me that he survived.
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Bet man buvo svarbu, kad jis išgyveno.
03:50
All I shared with them
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Jiems visiems aš pasakiau
03:52
was my first name.
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savo vardą.
03:55
They didn't know
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Jie nežinojo,
03:56
that I was a head of a department
at the Design Council.
at the Design Council.
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kad buvau „Design Council“ skyriaus
vadovė.
vadovė.
04:01
And here is my beloved briefcase,
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O čia yra mano mėgiamas portfelis,
04:04
also rescued from that morning.
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taip pat išgelbėtas tą rytą.
04:08
They didn't know that I published
architecture and design journals,
architecture and design journals,
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Jie nežinojo, kad aš leidau
architektūros ir dizaino žurnalus,
architektūros ir dizaino žurnalus,
04:12
that I was a Fellow
of the Royal Society of Arts,
of the Royal Society of Arts,
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kad buvau Karališkosios menų draugijos
narė,
narė,
04:15
that I wore black --
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kad rengiausi juodai –
04:18
still do --
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iki šiol tą darau –
04:20
that I smoked cigarillos.
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kad rūkiau cigariles.
04:23
I don't smoke cigarillos anymore.
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Aš daugiau jų neberūkau.
04:26
I drank gin and I watched TED Talks,
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Aš gėriau džiną ir žiūrėjau TED Talks,
04:30
of course, never dreaming
that one day I would be standing,
that one day I would be standing,
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žinoma, niekada nesvajodama,
kad vieną dieną stovėsiu,
kad vieną dieną stovėsiu,
04:37
balancing on prosthetic legs,
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balansuodama ant protezinių kojų,
04:40
giving a talk.
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sakydama kalbą.
04:42
I was a young Australian woman
doing extraordinary things in London.
doing extraordinary things in London.
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Buvau jauna australė, daranti nepaprastus
dalykus Londone.
dalykus Londone.
04:48
And I wasn't ready for that all to end.
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Ir aš nenorėjau, kad tai pasibaigtų.
04:52
I was so determined to survive
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Aš taip norėjau išgyventi,
04:56
that I used my scarf to tie tourniquets
around the tops of my legs,
around the tops of my legs,
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kad savo šaliku padariau turniketus
savo kojų galams
savo kojų galams
05:01
and I just shut everything
and everyone out,
and everyone out,
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ir nuo visko užsidariau,
05:07
to focus, to listen to myself,
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kad susitelkčiau, klausyčiau savęs,
05:10
to be guided by instinct alone.
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vadovaučiausi vien instinktu.
05:15
I lowered my breathing rate.
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Aš sulėtinau savo kvėpavimą.
05:17
I elevated my thighs.
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Iškėliau šlaunis.
05:19
I held myself upright
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Nugarą laikiau tiesiai
05:21
and I fought the urge to close my eyes.
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ir kovojau su noru užmerkti akis.
05:26
I held on for almost an hour,
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Laikiausi beveik valandą,
05:31
an hour to contemplate
the whole of my life
the whole of my life
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per kurią apmąsčiau visą savo gyvenimą
05:35
up until this point.
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iki tos akimirkos.
05:39
Perhaps I should have done more.
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Galbūt man reikėjo daugiau nuveikti.
05:43
Perhaps I could have
lived more, seen more.
lived more, seen more.
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Galbūt galėjau labiau gyventi,
daugiau pamatyti.
daugiau pamatyti.
05:46
Maybe I should have gone running,
dancing, taken up yoga.
dancing, taken up yoga.
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Galbūt man reikėjo pradėti bėgioti, šokti,
užsiimti joga.
užsiimti joga.
05:52
But my priority and my focus
was always my work.
was always my work.
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Bet man svarbiausia buvo darbas.
05:57
I lived to work.
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Gyvenau dėl darbo.
05:59
Who I was on my business card
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Man rūpėjo, kuo aš buvau
06:02
mattered to me.
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savo vizitinėje kortelėje.
06:05
But it didn't matter down in that tunnel.
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Bet tai nebuvo svarbu tame tunelyje.
06:11
By the time I felt that first touch
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Kai pajutau pirmą prisilietimą
06:15
from one of my rescuers,
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vieno iš savo gelbėtojų,
06:18
I was unable to speak,
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negalėjau kalbėti,
06:20
unable to say even
a small word, like "Gill."
a small word, like "Gill."
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netgi pasakyti trumpo žodžio,
kaip Gill.
kaip Gill.
06:27
I surrendered my body to them.
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Aš atidaviau savo kūną jiems.
06:29
I had done all I possibly could,
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Padariau viską, ką galėjau,
06:32
and now I was in their hands.
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ir dabar buvau jų rankose.
06:39
I understood
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Supratau,
06:41
just who and what humanity really is,
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kas iš tikro yra žmogiškumas,
06:47
when I first saw the ID tag
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kai pirma pamačiau tapatybės kortelę,
06:51
that was given to me
when I was admitted to hospital.
when I was admitted to hospital.
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man duotą mane pristačius į ligoninę.
06:54
And it read:
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Joje parašyta:
06:56
"One unknown estimated female."
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„Viena nenustatytos tapatybės
manoma moteris.“
manoma moteris.“
07:03
One unknown estimated female.
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Viena nenustatytos tapatybės
manoma moteris.
manoma moteris.
07:09
Those four words were my gift.
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Tie žodžiai man buvo dovana.
07:13
What they told me very clearly
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Jie man aiškiai sakė,
07:15
was that my life was saved,
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kad buvau išgelbėta,
07:18
purely because I was a human being.
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grynai dėl to, kad esu žmogiška būtybė.
07:22
Difference of any kind made no difference
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Jokie skirtumai tarp mūsų neturėjo įtakos
07:26
to the extraordinary lengths
that the rescuers were prepared to go
that the rescuers were prepared to go
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gelbėtojų ryžtui
07:32
to save my life,
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išgelbėti mane,
07:34
to save as many unknowns as they could,
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išgelbėti kuo daugiau nepažįstamųjų
07:37
and putting their own lives at risk.
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ir rizikuoti patiems savo gyvybe.
07:40
To them, it didn't matter
if I was rich or poor,
if I was rich or poor,
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Jiems nerūpėjo, ar aš buvau
turtinga ar vargšė,
turtinga ar vargšė,
07:45
the color of my skin,
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mano odos spalva,
07:47
whether I was male or female,
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buvau aš vyras ar moteris,
07:49
my sexual orientation,
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mano seksualinė orientacija,
07:51
who I voted for,
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už ką balsavau,
07:53
whether I was educated,
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ar buvau išsilavinusi,
07:54
if I had a faith or no faith at all.
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ar kuo tikėjau, ar ne.
07:59
Nothing mattered
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Visa tai buvo nesvarbu,
08:01
other than I was a precious human life.
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o svarbu tik tai, kad buvau
neįkainojama žmogaus gyvybė.
neįkainojama žmogaus gyvybė.
08:07
I see myself as a living fact.
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Save matau kaip gyvą faktą.
08:12
I am proof
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Esu įrodymas,
08:14
that unconditional love and respect
can not only save,
can not only save,
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kad besąlyginė meilė ir pagarba gali
ne tik išgelbėti,
ne tik išgelbėti,
08:21
but it can transform lives.
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bet ir keisti gyvenimus.
08:25
Here is a wonderful image
of one of my rescuers, Andy, and I
of one of my rescuers, Andy, and I
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Štai čia nuostabi vieno mano
gelbėtojo ir mano nuotrauka,
gelbėtojo ir mano nuotrauka,
08:29
taken just last year.
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daryta praėjusiais metais.
08:32
Ten years after the event,
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Dešimt metų po įvykio,
08:34
and here we are, arm in arm.
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ir štai mes, petys į petį.
08:39
Throughout all the chaos,
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Per visą chaosą
08:41
my hand was held tightly.
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mane stipriai laikė už rankos.
08:45
My face was stroked gently.
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Mano veidą švelniai glostė.
08:49
What did I feel?
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Ką aš jutau?
08:51
I felt loved.
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Jaučiausi mylima.
08:53
What's shielded me from hatred
and wanting retribution,
and wanting retribution,
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Kas apsaugojo mane nuo neapykantos
ir noro keršyti,
ir noro keršyti,
08:58
what's given me the courage to say:
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kas man suteikė drąsos ištarti:
09:01
this ends with me
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kas baigiasi su manimi –
09:06
is love.
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tai meilė.
09:08
I was loved.
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Buvau mylima.
09:13
I believe the potential
for widespread positive change
for widespread positive change
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Tikiu, kad potencialas
pokyčiams į gera
pokyčiams į gera
09:19
is absolutely enormous
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yra absoliučiai milžiniškas,
09:21
because I know what we're capable of.
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nes žinau, ką mes galime.
09:24
I know the brilliance of humanity.
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Aš žinau žmogiškumo spindesį.
09:27
So this leaves me with some
pretty big things to ponder
pretty big things to ponder
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Taigi tai verčia mane apmąstyti
gana svarbius dalykus
gana svarbius dalykus
09:31
and some questions for us all to consider:
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ir kelia mums visiems klausimų:
09:36
Is what unites us not far greater
than what can ever divide?
than what can ever divide?
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Ar tai, kas sieja mums, nėra
svarbiau nei tai, kas skiria?
svarbiau nei tai, kas skiria?
09:43
Does it have to take
a tragedy or a disaster
a tragedy or a disaster
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Ar mums reikia tragedijos ar nelaimės,
09:47
for us to feel deeply
connected as one species,
connected as one species,
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kad pasijustume itin susiję,
kaip žmonės?
kaip žmonės?
09:52
as human beings?
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09:55
And when will we embrace
the wisdom of our era
the wisdom of our era
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Ir kada mes pasinaudosime savo
eros išmintimi,
eros išmintimi,
10:01
to rise above mere tolerance
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kad pakiltume virš paprastos tolerancijos
10:05
and move to an acceptance
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ir pereitume prie pripažinimo visų,
10:08
for all who are only a label
until we know them?
until we know them?
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kurie mums tėra etiketės, kol jų
nepažįstame?
nepažįstame?
10:15
Thank you.
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Dėkoju.
10:16
(Applause)
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(Plojimai.)
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Gill Hicks - Survivor and activistGill Hicks has dedicated her life to being an advocate for peace.
Why you should listen
Dr. Gill Hicks is considered to be one of the most thought provoking, powerful and life affirming speakers in Australia and the UK. She is globally known as a survivor of the London terrorist bombings on July 7, 2005. She survived, but suffered severe and permanent injuries, losing both legs from just below the knee.
Originally from Adelaide, Australia, Hicks has lived in London since 1991, however in 2012 Hicks returned to Australia where she operates nationally and internationally through her not for profit M.A.D. for Peace network and her public speaking work.
Her unique and compelling projects and initiative's, aimed at both deterring anyone from following the path of violent extremism and building sustainable models for peace, draw upon Hicks's previous roles within the Arts.
An impressive career before the bombings included being at the helm of some of the UK's most prestigious and respected institutions -- including publishing director of the architecture, design and contemporary culture magazine, Blueprint, director of the Dangerous Minds design consultancy and head curator at the Design Council. It wasn’t until after the bombings that Hicks decided to dedicate her life to being an advocate for peace. She has made it her mission to use her experiences and her new body form to positive effect.
In 2007 Hicks founded the not for profit organisation M.A.D. for Peace, a platform that connects people globally and encourages us to think of "Peace as a Verb," something that we have an individual responsibility to do every day.
In 2008 Hicks released her first book, One Unknown, named after the chilling label given to her as she arrived to hospital as an unidentified body. The book was shortlisted for the Mind Book of the Year Awards.
Since her return to Australia in 2012, Hicks has been recognised as South Australian, Australian of the Year 2015 and is Chair to the Innovation component for the Committee for Adelaide.
In 2013 Hicks welcomed her daughter, Amelie into the world. This, as she describes it, is her finest achievement and greatest acknowledgement of the brilliance and resilience of the human body.
Gill Hicks | Speaker | TED.com