TEDGlobal 2017
Katlego Kolanyane-Kesupile: How I'm bringing queer pride to my rural village
Katlego Kolanyane-Kesupile: 我如何把酷兒驕傲帶到我的鄉村村落
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在這場很有詩意的個人化演說中，TED 會員 Katlego Kolanyane-Kesupile 探討了她的現代酷兒生活方式和她在波札納鄉村村落的童年養育之間的關係。「在這個時代，褐色皮膚的非裔酷兒可以存在，但鄉村除外──我害怕這抹煞了當初讓我們走到現今這一步的那些掙扎。」她說：「將我的酷兒特性給本土化就意味著在我自己的許多特殊部分之間搭起橋樑。」
Katlego Kolanyane-Kesupile - Artist, activist
Katlego Kolanyane-Kesupile is the founder of the Queer Shorts Showcase Festival, Botswana's first and only LGBT-themed theatre festival. Full bio
Katlego Kolanyane-Kesupile is the founder of the Queer Shorts Showcase Festival, Botswana's first and only LGBT-themed theatre festival. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:12
"You don't belong here"
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「你不屬於這裡」幾乎總是意味著
00:14
almost always means, "We can't find
a function or a role for you."
a function or a role for you."
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「我們找不到適合你的職務或角色。」
00:18
"You don't belong here" sometimes means,
"You're too queer to handle."
"You're too queer to handle."
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「你不屬於這裡」有時也意味著
「你太酷兒了，我們無法接受。」
「你太酷兒了，我們無法接受。」
00:24
"You don't belong here"
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「你不屬於這裡」
00:27
very rarely means,
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很少意味著
00:29
"There's no way for you to exist
and be happy here."
and be happy here."
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「你在這裡無法生存，找不到快樂。」
00:33
I went to university
in Johannesburg, South Africa,
in Johannesburg, South Africa,
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我在南非的约翰尼斯堡讀大學，
00:36
and I remember the first time
a white friend of mine
a white friend of mine
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我還記得一位白人朋友
00:38
heard me speaking Setswana,
the national language of Botswana.
the national language of Botswana.
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第一次聽我説波札納的國語，札納語。
00:43
I was on the phone with my mother
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當時我正在和我媽講電話，
00:44
and the intrigue which painted itself
across her face was absolutely priceless.
across her face was absolutely priceless.
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她滿臉好奇的樣子實在很有趣。
00:50
As soon as I hung up,
she comes to me and says,
she comes to me and says,
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我一掛斷電話，她就來跟我說，
00:53
"I didn't know you could do that.
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「我不知道你會那個。
00:54
After all these years of knowing you,
how did I not know you could do that?"
how did I not know you could do that?"
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我認識你那麼多年，
竟然不知道你還會那個！」
竟然不知道你還會那個！」
00:59
What she was referring to was the fact
that I could switch off the twang
that I could switch off the twang
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她指的是我能從高亢的鼻音
01:02
and slip into a native tongue,
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切換到母語，
01:04
and so I chose to let her in
on a few other things
on a few other things
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於是，我決定讓她知道更多其他
01:07
which locate me as a Motswana,
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關於我身為波札納人的事情，
01:10
not just by virtue of the fact
that I speak a language
that I speak a language
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不僅僅是我會説札納語，
01:13
or I have family there,
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或者我有家人在波札納，
01:14
but that a rural child lives
within this shiny visage of fabulosity.
within this shiny visage of fabulosity.
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也告訴她，在這光彩奪目的外表下，
我其實是一個農村孩子。
我其實是一個農村孩子。
01:19
(Laughter)
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（笑聲）
01:22
(Applause)
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（掌聲）
01:26
I invited the Motswana public
into the story, my story,
into the story, my story,
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多年前，我以跨性別者的身份，
邀請波札納大眾，
進入這個故事，我的故事，
進入這個故事，我的故事，
01:29
as a transgender person years ago,
in English of course,
in English of course,
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當然，用的是英文。
因為札納語是種性別中立的語言，
因為札納語是種性別中立的語言，
01:33
because Setswana
is a gender-neutral language
is a gender-neutral language
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01:35
and the closest we get
is an approximation of "transgender."
is an approximation of "transgender."
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只有近似「變性者」的詞彙。
01:39
And an important part of my history
got left out of that story,
got left out of that story,
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那個故事中沒有提及
我的歷史中很重要的一部分，
我的歷史中很重要的一部分，
01:42
by association rather than
out of any act of shame.
out of any act of shame.
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沒提及的原因，是因為
關聯不大，而非出於羞恥。
關聯不大，而非出於羞恥。
01:47
"Kat" was an international superstar,
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「凱特」是一位國際巨星，
01:50
a fashion and lifestyle writer,
a musician, theater producer
a musician, theater producer
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時尚和風格的作家、音樂家、
戲劇製作人，以及表演者——
01:53
and performer --
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01:55
all the things that qualify me
to be a mainstream, whitewashed,
to be a mainstream, whitewashed,
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這一切都讓我有資格成為
一名主流的、被粉飾過的、
一名主流的、被粉飾過的、
01:58
new age digestible queer.
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容易瞭解的新世紀酷兒。
02:01
Kat.
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凱特。
02:02
Kat had a degree from one
of the best universities in Africa,
of the best universities in Africa,
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凱特在非洲最好的
大學之一拿到學位，
大學之一拿到學位，
02:06
oh no, the world.
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喔，不，是世界最好。
02:08
By association, what Kat wasn't
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就關聯性來說，凱特並不像是
02:10
was just like the little
brown-skinned children
brown-skinned children
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褐色皮膚的小孩子，
02:13
frolicking through the streets
of some incidental railway settlement
of some incidental railway settlement
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在鐵路延續居住地的街上嬉戲，
02:16
like Tati Siding,
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像是塔堤賽汀，
02:17
or an off-the-grid village like Kgagodi,
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或是缺乏基礎設施的村落，
像是卡戈迪，
像是卡戈迪，
02:21
legs clad in dust stockings
whose knees had blackened
whose knees had blackened
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腳上穿著滿是塵土的長襪，
膝蓋處都發黑了，
膝蓋處都發黑了，
02:24
from years of kneeling
and wax-polishing floors,
and wax-polishing floors,
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這是長年跪著給地板打蠟的結果，
02:27
whose shins were marked
with lessons from climbing trees,
with lessons from climbing trees,
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脛骨上盡是爬樹留下的痕跡，
02:31
who played until dusk,
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因為要一直玩到黃昏，
02:33
went in for supper by a paraffin lamp
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才進到房裡在煤油燈旁吃晚餐，
02:35
and returned to play hide-and-seek
amongst centipedes and owls
amongst centipedes and owls
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接著再回來在蜈蚣
和貓頭鷹之中玩躲迷藏，
和貓頭鷹之中玩躲迷藏，
02:40
until finally someone's mother
would call the whole thing to an end.
would call the whole thing to an end.
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直到有個人的母親出來
要大家到此為止。
要大家到此為止。
02:44
That got lost both in translation
and in transition,
and in transition,
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那些在翻譯和轉變之中，
都已經失去了，
都已經失去了，
02:49
and when I realized this,
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當我了解到這一點，
我決定該是開始
我決定該是開始
02:50
I decided it was time for me to start
building bridges between myselves.
building bridges between myselves.
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在我自己之間建立橋樑的時候了。
02:55
For me and for others to access me,
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為了讓我以及他人能夠接近我，
02:58
I had to start indigenizing my queerness.
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我得要開始將我的
酷兒特性給本土化。
酷兒特性給本土化。
03:01
What I mean by indigenizing
is stripping away the city life film
is stripping away the city life film
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我所謂的本土化，指的是
把城市生活的這層薄膜給剝除，
把城市生活的這層薄膜給剝除，
03:05
that stops you from seeing
the villager within.
the villager within.
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這層薄膜讓你無法看見
內在的這個村民。
內在的這個村民。
03:08
In a time where being brown, queer,
African and seen as worthy of space
African and seen as worthy of space
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在這個時代，褐色皮膚的
非裔酷兒可以存在，
非裔酷兒可以存在，
03:12
means being everything but rural,
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但鄉村除外──
03:14
I fear that we're erasing
the very struggles
the very struggles
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我害怕這抹煞了當初讓我們
03:16
that got us to where we are now.
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走到現今這一步的那些掙扎。
03:19
The very first time I queered
being out in a village,
being out in a village,
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我最早一次在村落中
以酷兒身份的出現，
以酷兒身份的出現，
03:22
I was in my early 20s,
and I wore a kaftan.
and I wore a kaftan.
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是在我二十出頭的時候，
我穿著寬大的女長袍。
我穿著寬大的女長袍。
03:25
I was ridiculed by some of my family
and by strangers for wearing a dress.
and by strangers for wearing a dress.
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因為穿連衣裙，一些家人
和陌生人嘲笑我。
和陌生人嘲笑我。
03:30
My defense against their comments
was the default that we who don't belong,
was the default that we who don't belong,
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我對他們評論的辯護是默認
不屬於他們群體、比他們優秀的人
就是會被他們教訓，
就是會被他們教訓，
03:34
the ones who are better than, get taught,
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03:37
we shrug them off and say,
"They just don't know enough."
"They just don't know enough."
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就聳聳肩說：「他們只是不夠了解。」
03:41
And of course I was wrong,
because my idea of wealth of knowledge
because my idea of wealth of knowledge
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當然，我錯了，因為
我對於知識豐富的認知
我對於知識豐富的認知
03:45
was based in removing yourself
from Third World thinking and living.
from Third World thinking and living.
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是立基在讓你自己脫離
第三世界的思考和生活。
03:52
But it took time for me to realize
that my acts of pride
that my acts of pride
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但我花了一些時間，
才了解到我的驕傲之舉
才了解到我的驕傲之舉
03:55
weren't most alive in
the global cities I traipsed through,
the global cities I traipsed through,
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在我闖蕩過的全球城市中
並不是最活躍的，
並不是最活躍的，
03:58
but in the villages where I speak
the languages and play the games
the languages and play the games
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最活躍的是在我說那些語言、
玩那些遊戲的村落裡，
玩那些遊戲的村落裡，
04:02
and feel most at home and I can say,
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那是我最覺得像家的
地方，我可以說：
地方，我可以說：
04:04
"I have seen the world,
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「我已經看過世界了，
04:06
and I know that people like me
aren't alone here, we are everywhere."
aren't alone here, we are everywhere."
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我知道在這裡，像我這樣的人
並不孤單，到處都有這樣的人。」
並不孤單，到處都有這樣的人。」
04:11
And so I used these village homes
for self-reflection
for self-reflection
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所以，我用這些村落的家
來做自我反思，
來做自我反思，
04:14
and to give hope
to the others who don't belong.
to the others who don't belong.
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並將希望帶給那些沒有歸屬的人。
04:17
Indigenizing my queerness
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將我的酷兒特性給本土化
04:19
means bridging the many
exceptional parts of myself.
exceptional parts of myself.
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就意味著在我自己的許多
特殊部分之間搭起橋樑。
特殊部分之間搭起橋樑。
04:24
It means honoring the fact
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它意味著要尊敬
04:26
that my tongue can contort itself
to speak the romance languages
to speak the romance languages
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我的舌頭能控制它自己
去說出浪漫的語言，
去說出浪漫的語言，
04:29
without denying or exoticizing the fact
that when I am moved, it can do this:
that when I am moved, it can do this:
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且不否認或奇特化一件事實：
當我被感動時，我的舌頭能這樣：
當我被感動時，我的舌頭能這樣：
04:35
(Ululating)
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（嗥聲）
04:41
It means --
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它意味著——
04:42
(Cheers)
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（歡呼）
04:44
(Applause)
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（掌聲）
04:48
It means branding cattle with my mother
or chopping firewood with my cousins
or chopping firewood with my cousins
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它意味著，和我媽媽一起給小牛
打上烙印，或和我表親一起砍材，
打上烙印，或和我表親一起砍材，
04:52
doesn't make me
any less fabulous or queer,
any less fabulous or queer,
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並不會讓我比較不美麗或酷兒，
04:54
even though I'm now accustomed
to rooftop shindigs, wine-paired menus
to rooftop shindigs, wine-paired menus
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即使我現在已經習慣了
頂樓的社交聚會、搭配酒的菜單，
頂樓的社交聚會、搭配酒的菜單，
04:58
and VIP lounges.
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以及貴賓室。
05:00
(Laughter)
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（笑聲）
05:02
It means wearing my pride
through my grandmother's tongue,
through my grandmother's tongue,
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它意味著透過我祖母的舌頭、
我媽媽的食物、
我媽媽的食物、
05:07
my mother's food, my grandfather's song,
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我祖父的歌曲，來佩帶我的驕傲，
05:09
my skin etched with stories
of falling off donkeys
of falling off donkeys
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我的皮膚鮮明地描述著
落下驢子的故事，
落下驢子的故事，
05:13
and years and years and years
of sleeping under a blanket of stars.
of sleeping under a blanket of stars.
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還有睡在星空之毯
底下的那些歲月。
底下的那些歲月。
05:19
If there's any place I don't belong,
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如果我真的不屬於某一個地方，
05:22
it's in a mind where the story of me
starts with the branch of me being queer
starts with the branch of me being queer
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那個地方就是認定了我的故事
始於我身為酷兒的那個分支，
始於我身為酷兒的那個分支，
05:26
and not with my rural roots.
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而非我鄉村根源的那種想法。
05:29
Indigenizing my queerness
means understanding
means understanding
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將我的酷兒特性
給本土化，意味著了解到
給本土化，意味著了解到
05:32
that the rural is a part of me,
and I am an indelible part of it.
and I am an indelible part of it.
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鄉村是我的一部分，
我也是鄉村難以抹滅的一部分。
我也是鄉村難以抹滅的一部分。
05:37
Thank you.
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謝謝。
05:38
(Applause)
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（掌聲）
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Katlego Kolanyane-Kesupile - Artist, activistKatlego Kolanyane-Kesupile is the founder of the Queer Shorts Showcase Festival, Botswana's first and only LGBT-themed theatre festival.
Why you should listen
Katlego Kolanyane-Kesupile is an ARTivist, communications specialist and human rights practitioner from Botswana. She is the founder and artistic director of the Queer Shorts Showcase Festival, author of "…on about the same old things" and a globally performed playwright with a vested interest in the development of LGBT+ inclusive cultures in Africa. She holds a Masters in Human Rights, Culture and Social Justice.
More profile about the speakerKatlego Kolanyane-Kesupile | Speaker | TED.com