TED2014
Elizabeth Gilbert: Success, failure and the drive to keep creating
伊莉莎白．吉兒伯特: 成功、失敗，以及持續創造的動力
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伊莉莎白．吉兒伯特曾是被拒絕信壓得傷心欲絕的「沒出書的餐廳服務生」。然而，尾隨《享受吧！一個人的旅行》成功而來的是，她發現自己強烈地自認為是過去的那個自己。帶著美好洞察力的吉兒伯特告訴我們，為什麼成功可以和失敗一樣讓人迷惑。雖然不簡單，但她也提供了一種簡單的方式繼續走下去，無論結果是如何。
Elizabeth Gilbert - Writer
The author of 'Eat, Pray, Love,' Elizabeth Gilbert has thought long and hard about some big topics. Her fascinations: genius, creativity and how we get in our own way when it comes to both. Full bio
The author of 'Eat, Pray, Love,' Elizabeth Gilbert has thought long and hard about some big topics. Her fascinations: genius, creativity and how we get in our own way when it comes to both. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:12
So, a few years ago I was at JFK Airport
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幾年前我在甘迺迪國際機場，
00:15
about to get on a flight,
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快上飛機時，
00:17
when I was approached by two women
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有兩位女士靠近我，
00:19
who I do not think would be insulted
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她們兩人矮小、蒼老，
00:21
to hear themselves described
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是措辭嚴厲的
義大利裔美國女性，
義大利裔美國女性，
00:22
as tiny old tough-talking Italian-American broads.
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我想他們聽我這麼說
並不會覺得受辱。
並不會覺得受辱。
00:26
The taller one, who is like up here,
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較高的那位大概這麼高，
00:29
she comes marching up to me, and she goes,
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她快速走向我，接著說：
00:31
"Honey, I gotta ask you something.
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「親愛的，我得問你個問題。
00:33
You got something to do with that whole
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你和最近流行的
00:35
'Eat, Pray, Love' thing that's been going on lately?"
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《享受吧！一個人的旅行》有關？」
00:38
And I said, "Yes, I did."
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我說：「是的。」
00:40
And she smacks her friend and she goes,
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她拍了一下朋友後說：
00:42
"See, I told you, I said, that's that girl.
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「看吧，我就說她是那女孩。
00:44
That's that girl who wrote that book
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她就是寫了那本書的女孩，
00:46
based on that movie."
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根據那部電影寫的。」
00:48
(Laughter)
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（笑聲）
00:50
So that's who I am.
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那就是我。
00:52
And believe me, I'm extremely
grateful to be that person,
grateful to be that person,
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相信我，我非常榮幸能成為那個人，
00:56
because that whole "Eat, Pray, Love" thing
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因為《享受吧！一個人的旅行》的那整件事，
00:58
was a huge break for me.
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對我來說是天大的好運。
01:00
But it also left me in a really tricky position
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但那也讓我處在很微妙的位置，
01:02
moving forward as an author
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那就是以作家身分繼續前進，
01:04
trying to figure out how in the world
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我到底要如何才能
01:06
I was ever going to write a book again
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再寫本可以取悅任何人的書，
01:07
that would ever please anybody,
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01:09
because I knew well in advance
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因為我早知道
01:11
that all of those people who
had adored "Eat, Pray, Love"
had adored "Eat, Pray, Love"
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每位超愛《享受吧！一個人的旅行》的讀者
01:14
were going to be incredibly disappointed
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會有多麼失望，
01:15
in whatever I wrote next
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因為不論我接下來寫什麼，
01:17
because it wasn't going to be "Eat, Pray, Love,"
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那都不再是《享受吧！一個人的旅行》；
01:19
and all of those people who
had hated "Eat, Pray, Love"
had hated "Eat, Pray, Love"
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而那些討厭《享受吧！一個人的旅行》的人
01:21
were going to be incredibly disappointed
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也會大失所望，
01:22
in whatever I wrote next
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因為不論我接下來寫什麼，
01:24
because it would provide evidence that I still lived.
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那都證明了我還活著。
01:26
So I knew that I had no way to win,
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因此我知道自己沒有贏的機會，
01:30
and knowing that I had no way to win
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也知道自己沒辦法贏，
01:32
made me seriously consider for a while
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這件事讓我認真思考了一陣子，
01:34
just quitting the game
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就放棄這場遊戲吧，
01:35
and moving to the country to raise corgis.
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然後搬到鄉下去養柯基犬。
01:39
But if I had done that, if I had given up writing,
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但如果我當時那麼做，
如果我當時放棄寫作，
如果我當時放棄寫作，
01:41
I would have lost my beloved vocation,
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就會失去最愛的天職。
01:43
so I knew that the task was that I had to find
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因此，我知道任務是我得找到某個方法
01:45
some way to gin up the inspiration
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來抓住靈感，
01:48
to write the next book
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才能寫下一本書，
01:49
regardless of its inevitable negative outcome.
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不管那無可避免的失敗。
01:52
In other words, I had to find a way to make sure
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換句話說，我得找到方法確保
01:53
that my creativity survived its own success.
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我的創造力能在曾有的成功裡倖存。
01:56
And I did, in the end, find that inspiration,
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後來，我找到了那靈感，
01:58
but I found it in the most unlikely
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但我發現那是在最不可能，
02:00
and unexpected place.
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也最想不到的地方出現。
02:01
I found it in lessons that I had learned earlier in life
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我是在生活中
早已學過的課題中發現
早已學過的課題中發現
02:04
about how creativity can survive its own failure.
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創造力如何從過去的失敗中存活下來。
02:08
So just to back up and explain,
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因此只要回顧並說明，
02:09
the only thing I have ever wanted to be
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我這輩子唯一想做的事，
02:11
for my whole life was a writer.
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就是作家。
02:13
I wrote all through childhood,
all through adolescence,
all through adolescence,
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整個童年和青春期我都在寫，
02:15
by the time I was a teenager I was sending
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在我還是青少女時，
02:17
my very bad stories to The New Yorker,
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我把自己的爛故事寄給《紐約客》，
02:19
hoping to be discovered.
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希望能被發掘。
02:20
After college, I got a job as a diner waitress,
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唸完大學，我開始當餐廳服務生，
02:23
kept working, kept writing,
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我繼續工作、寫作，
02:25
kept trying really hard to get published,
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為了能出版非常努力，
02:27
and failing at it.
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然後卻失敗了。
02:29
I failed at getting published
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我有將近六年沒得到出版機會。
02:30
for almost six years.
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02:32
So for almost six years, every single day,
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因此幾乎這六年的每一天，
02:34
I had nothing but rejection letters
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除了拒絕信在信箱等我之外，
02:35
waiting for me in my mailbox.
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什麼都沒有。
02:37
And it was devastating every single time,
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每次都讓人傷心欲絕，
02:39
and every single time, I had to ask myself
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每一次，我都得自問
02:41
if I should just quit while I was behind
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每當我失敗了，是不是該就此罷手、
02:43
and give up and spare myself this pain.
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放棄，讓自己不再受苦。
02:47
But then I would find my resolve,
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但之後我發現自己的決心，而且始終如一，
02:48
and always in the same way,
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02:50
by saying, "I'm not going to quit,
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只要說：「我不打算放棄，
02:52
I'm going home."
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我要回家了。」
02:54
And you have to understand that for me,
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你要了解對我來說，
02:55
going home did not mean
returning to my family's farm.
returning to my family's farm.
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回家的意思不是回到我家的農場。
02:58
For me, going home
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對我來說，
回家意謂著回到寫作的工作上，
03:00
meant returning to the work of writing
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03:01
because writing was my home,
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因為寫作就是我的家，
03:03
because I loved writing more
than I hated failing at writing,
than I hated failing at writing,
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因為我熱愛寫作
勝於我討厭寫壞了的感覺，
勝於我討厭寫壞了的感覺，
03:06
which is to say that I loved writing
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那就是說我愛寫作
03:08
more than I loved my own ego,
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勝於我的自我，
03:09
which is ultimately to say
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終極的意義就是
03:11
that I loved writing more than I loved myself.
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我愛寫作勝於愛自己。
03:13
And that's how I pushed through it.
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那就是我走過來的方式。
03:15
But the weird thing is that 20 years later,
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但奇怪的是 20 年後，
03:17
during the crazy ride of "Eat, Pray, Love,"
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在《享受吧！一個人的旅行》的
瘋狂之旅期間，
瘋狂之旅期間，
03:19
I found myself identifying all over again
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我發現自己又再次用
03:21
with that unpublished young diner waitress
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當年那個沒出書的
年輕服務生認定一切，
年輕服務生認定一切，
03:24
who I used to be, thinking about her constantly,
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我總是不斷想起她，
03:26
and feeling like I was her again,
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再次覺得自己就是她，
03:28
which made no rational sense whatsoever
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其實這沒什麼道理，
03:30
because our lives could not
have been more different.
have been more different.
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因為我們的生活早已天差地遠。
03:32
She had failed constantly.
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她不斷失敗，
03:33
I had succeeded beyond my wildest expectation.
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而我曾超乎意料之外的成功。
03:36
We had nothing in common.
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我們沒有任何共通處。
03:37
Why did I suddenly feel like I was her all over again?
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為什麼我突然又覺得自己就是她？
03:40
And it was only when I was trying to unthread that
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一直到我試著抽絲剝繭，
03:43
that I finally began to comprehend
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才終於開始理解
03:44
the strange and unlikely psychological connection
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那奇怪又不真實的精神連結
03:47
in our lives between the way
we experience great failure
we experience great failure
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存在我倆生命中
03:49
and the way we experience great success.
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經歷大起大落的方式之間。
03:51
So think of it like this:
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用這個方式思考：
03:53
For most of your life, you live out your existence
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你大半輩子的生活
03:55
here in the middle of the chain of human experience
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是在人類的歷史洪流中渡過，
03:57
where everything is normal
and reassuring and regular,
and reassuring and regular,
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每件事都很正常、可靠與規律，
04:00
but failure catapults you abruptly way out over here
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但失敗讓你猛然落入遠在天邊、
04:04
into the blinding darkness of disappointment.
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黑得看不見五指的失望深淵裡。
04:06
Success catapults you just as abruptly but just as far
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成功也是讓你猛然落入
同樣遠在天邊的
04:10
way out over here
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04:11
into the equally blinding glare
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那以名聲、肯定與讚賞
所構成的目盲眩光之中。
所構成的目盲眩光之中。
04:13
of fame and recognition and praise.
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而在這兩種命運中，有一個
04:16
And one of these fates
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04:17
is objectively seen by the world as bad,
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在客觀上，是被世人認為不好的，
04:20
and the other one is objectively
seen by the world as good,
seen by the world as good,
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而另一個則被視為好的，
04:22
but your subconscious is completely incapable
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但你的潛意識卻完全無法
04:24
of discerning the difference between bad and good.
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分辨好與壞的差別。
04:27
The only thing that it is capable of feeling
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唯一能感受到的是
04:29
is the absolute value of this emotional equation,
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這種情感方程式的絕對值，
04:33
the exact distance that you have been flung
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那就是一直以來
你被拋離自己的距離。
你被拋離自己的距離。
04:35
from yourself.
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04:37
And there's a real equal danger in both cases
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這兩種情況都有同樣真實的危險，
04:39
of getting lost out there
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就是在心靈深處迷失。
04:40
in the hinterlands of the psyche.
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04:42
But in both cases, it turns out that there is
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但這兩者也同樣都有
自我修復的解方，
自我修復的解方，
04:44
also the same remedy for self-restoration,
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04:47
and that is that you have got to
find your way back home again
find your way back home again
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那就是你必須再次找到回家的路，
04:50
as swiftly and smoothly as you can,
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儘可能快速與平穩，
04:52
and if you're wondering what your home is,
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如果你想知道自己的家在何方，
04:54
here's a hint:
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可以試想：
04:55
Your home is whatever in this world you love
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你的家就是這世上，
你愛它比愛自己還多的地方。
04:57
more than you love yourself.
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04:59
So that might be creativity, it might be family,
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因此那也許是創造，也許是家庭，
05:01
it might be invention, adventure,
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也許是發明、冒險、
05:03
faith, service, it might be raising corgis,
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信仰、佈道，也許是養柯基犬，
05:06
I don't know, your home is that thing
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都有可能，你的家就是那個
05:08
to which you can dedicate your energies
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你能奉獻活力的地方，
05:10
with such singular devotion
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有了如此獨一無二的奉獻，
05:12
that the ultimate results become inconsequential.
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最後的結果就會變得微不足道。
05:15
For me, that home has always been writing.
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對我來說，家一直以來都是寫作。
05:18
So after the weird, disorienting success
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因此在完成《享受吧！一個人的旅行》
不可思議又讓人迷惘的成功之後，
05:20
that I went through with "Eat, Pray, Love,"
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05:22
I realized that all I had to do was exactly
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我了解自己需要做的
05:23
the same thing that I used to have to do all the time
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就和我處在迷惘的失敗中時
05:25
when I was an equally disoriented failure.
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必須做的同一件事。
05:27
I had to get my ass back to work,
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我得起身去工作，
05:29
and that's what I did, and that's how, in 2010,
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那是我過去做的事，也是在 2010 年時，
05:32
I was able to publish the dreaded follow-up
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我為什麼能出版那嚇人的東西
接續《享受吧！一個人的旅行》。
05:34
to "Eat, Pray, Love."
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05:35
And you know what happened with that book?
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你知道那本書後來怎麼了嗎？
05:37
It bombed, and I was fine.
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大慘敗，但我還是好好的。
05:39
Actually, I kind of felt bulletproof,
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其實我覺得自己就像百毒不侵，
05:41
because I knew that I had broken the spell
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因為我知道自己早就破除了魔咒，
05:43
and I had found my way back home
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我已經找到回家的路，
05:45
to writing for the sheer devotion of it.
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就是為了全然的奉獻而寫。
05:48
And I stayed in my home of writing after that,
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那之後我待在寫作的家，
05:50
and I wrote another book that just came out last year
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寫了另一本書，在去年出版，
05:51
and that one was really beautifully received,
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而且也頗受好評，
05:53
which is very nice, but not my point.
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雖然那不是重點，但那真棒。
05:55
My point is that I'm writing another one now,
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重點是我正在寫另一本書，
05:57
and I'll write another book after that
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之後會再寫另一本書，
05:58
and another and another and another
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未來也會寫更多、更多書，
06:00
and many of them will fail,
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之中有很多本都會慘敗，
06:01
and some of them might succeed,
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也許有幾本會成功，
06:03
but I will always be safe
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但是我永遠會平安地
06:04
from the random hurricanes of outcome
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從不時出現的颶風般結局中活下來，
06:07
as long as I never forget where I rightfully live.
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只要我永遠不忘
自己生活在對的地方。
自己生活在對的地方。
06:10
Look, I don't know where you rightfully live,
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我不知道哪裡對你來說是對的地方，
06:13
but I know that there's something in this world
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但我知道世上有某種
06:14
that you love more than you love yourself.
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你愛它勝過愛自己的東西。
06:16
Something worthy, by the way,
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某種有價值的東西，
06:18
so addiction and infatuation don't count,
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但是成癮和沉溺不算，
06:20
because we all know that those
are not safe places to live. Right?
are not safe places to live. Right?
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因為我們都知道那不安全，對吧。
06:24
The only trick is that you've got to identify
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唯一的訣竅是你得辨別
06:26
the best, worthiest thing that you love most,
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你最愛的東西中最好，
也最有價值的那個，
也最有價值的那個，
06:28
and then build your house right on top of it
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接著在那之上建立起自己的家，
06:31
and don't budge from it.
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不要讓步。
06:33
And if you should someday, somehow
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如果你在某天
06:35
get vaulted out of your home
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從家裡被拋出，
06:37
by either great failure or great success,
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不論是因為慘敗或是大勝，
06:39
then your job is to fight your
way back to that home
way back to that home
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你的工作就是努力回到那個家，
06:42
the only way that it has ever been done,
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唯一能夠做到的方式
06:43
by putting your head down and performing
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就是埋頭苦幹，
06:46
with diligence and devotion
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用勤奮、奉獻、尊重且崇敬的態度去做，
06:47
and respect and reverence
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不論接下來這項任務是什麼，
06:49
whatever the task is that love
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06:51
is calling forth from you next.
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愛都會在下一個階段呼喚你。
06:53
You just do that, and keep doing that
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你只要做，不停地做，
06:55
again and again and again,
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一而再、再而三，
06:57
and I can absolutely promise you,
from long personal experience
from long personal experience
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我能向你保證，
以我長久以來的
各種個人經驗來看，
各種個人經驗來看，
07:00
in every direction, I can assure you
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我能保證一切都會平安無事。
07:02
that it's all going to be okay.
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07:04
Thank you.
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謝謝。
07:06
(Applause)
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（掌聲）
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Elizabeth Gilbert - WriterThe author of 'Eat, Pray, Love,' Elizabeth Gilbert has thought long and hard about some big topics. Her fascinations: genius, creativity and how we get in our own way when it comes to both.
Why you should listen
Elizabeth Gilbert faced down a premidlife crisis by doing what we all secretly dream of -- running off for a year. Her travels through Italy, India and Indonesia resulted in the megabestselling and deeply beloved memoir Eat, Pray, Love, about her process of finding herself by leaving home.
She's a longtime magazine writer -- covering music and politics for Spin and GQ -- as well as a novelist and short-story writer. Her books include the story collection Pilgrims, the novel Stern Men (about lobster fishermen in Maine) and a biography of the woodsman Eustace Conway, called The Last American Man. Her work has been the basis for two movies so far (Coyote Ugly, based on her own tale of working at the famously raunchy bar in New York City), and Eat, Pray, Love, with the part of Gilbert played by Julia Roberts. Not bad for a year off.
In 2010, Elizabeth published Committed, a memoir exploring her ambivalent feelings about the institution of marriage. And her 2013 novel, The Signature of All Things, is "a sprawling tale of 19th century botanical exploration."
Gilbert also owns and runs the import shop Two Buttons in Frenchtown, New Jersey.
Elizabeth Gilbert | Speaker | TED.com