TED2006
Julia Sweeney: Letting go of God
Julia Sweeney o napuštanju Boga
Filmed:
Readability: 3
4,604,979 views
Julia Sweeney (Bog reče, "Ha!") izvodi prvih 15 minuta svojeg nastupa iz 2006. "Letting Go of God" (Napuštanje Boga). Kad joj dva mlada mormonska misionara pokucaju jednog dana na vrata, to je potakne da u potpunosti preispita vlastita uvjerenja.
Julia Sweeney - Actor, comedian, playwright
Julia Sweeney creates comedic works that tackle deep issues: cancer, family, faith. Full bio
Julia Sweeney creates comedic works that tackle deep issues: cancer, family, faith. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:25
On September 10, the morning of my seventh birthday,
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10. rujna, na jutro mog sedmog rođendana,
00:28
I came downstairs to the kitchen, where my mother was washing the dishes
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spustila sam se u kuhinju, gdje je moja majka prala suđe
00:32
and my father was reading the paper or something,
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a moj otac čitao novine ili nešto slično,
00:35
and I sort of presented myself to them in the doorway, and they said,
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pojavila sam se na vratima, i oni su rekli,
00:38
"Hey, happy birthday!" And I said, "I'm seven."
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"Hej, sretan rođendan." Ja sam rekla, "Imam sedam godina."
00:43
And my father smiled and said,
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Moj otac se smiješio i rekao,
00:45
"Well, you know what that means, don't you?"
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"Dakle, znaš što to znači, zar ne?"
00:47
And I said, "Yeah, that I'm going to have a party and a cake
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Rekla sam, "Da, imat ću zabavu i tortu
00:50
and get a lot of presents?" And my dad said, "Well, yes.
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i dobit ću puno poklona?" Moj tata je rekao, "Pa, da
00:54
But, more importantly, being seven means that you've reached the age of reason,
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No, što je važnije, imati sedam znači da si dostigla dob razuma,
00:59
and you're now capable of committing any and all sins against God and man."
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i sad si kadra počiniti grijeh protiv Boga i čovjeka."
01:03
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
01:06
Now, I had heard this phrase, "age of reason," before.
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Čula sam taj izraz, "dob razuma" i prije.
01:09
Sister Mary Kevin had been bandying it about
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Sestra Mary Kevin je raspravljala o tome
01:12
my second-grade class at school. But when she said it,
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u drugom razredu osnovne. No kad je to ona rekla
01:14
the phrase seemed all caught up in the excitement of preparations
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izraz se činio povezan s uzbuđenjem oko priprema
01:17
for our first communion and our first confession,
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za našu prvu pričest i prvu ispovijed,
01:19
and everybody knew that was really all about the white dress and the white veil,
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i svi su znali da se zapravo radi o bijeloj haljini i bijelom velu,
01:24
and anyway, I hadn't really paid all that much attention to that phrase, "age of reason."
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u svakom slučaju, nisam obraćala pažnju na izraz "dob razuma".
01:28
So, I said, "Yeah, yeah, age of reason. What does that mean again?"
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Rekla sam, "Da, da, dob razuma. Što to, još jednom, znači?"
01:33
And my dad said, "Well, we believe in the Catholic Church
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I moj je otac rekao, "Pa, mi u katoličkoj crkvi vjerujemo
01:36
that God knows that little kids don't know the difference between right and wrong,
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da Bog zna da mala djeca ne znaju razliku između dobrog i lošeg,
01:40
but when you're seven, you're old enough to know better.
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no kad ti je sedam, imaš dovoljno godina da budeš pametnija.
01:42
So, you've grown up, and reached the age of reason, and now
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Znači, narasla si i dostigla dob razuma, i sad će
01:46
God will start keeping notes on you and begin your permanent record."
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Bog bilježiti sve o tebi i otvoriti ti trajni dosje."
01:50
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
01:51
And I said, "Oh. Wait a minute. You mean all that time,
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I ja sam rekla, "Ah. Samo malo. Znači, sve ovo vrijeme,
01:58
up till today, all that time I was so good, God didn't notice it?"
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do danas, sve ovo vrijeme što sam bila dobra, Bog nije primijetio?"
02:04
And my mom said, "Well, I noticed it."
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Moja mama je rekla, "Pa, ja sam primijetila."
02:07
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
02:09
And I thought, "How could I not have known this before?
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Pomislila sam, "Kako za to nisam prije znala?
02:11
How could it not have sunk in when they'd been telling me?
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Kako to nisam zapamtila kad su mi govorili?
02:13
All that being good and no real credit for it.
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Bez zasluga za dobro ponašanje.
02:16
And, worst of all, how could I not have realized this very important information
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I, što je najgore, kako nisam shvaćala tu jako važnu informaciju
02:19
until the very day that it was basically useless to me?"
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sve do dana kad mi je postala beskorisna?"
02:23
So I said, "Well, Mom and Dad, what about Santa Claus?
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Zatim sam rekla, "Pa, Mama i Tata, što je s Djedom Mrazom?
02:26
I mean, Santa Claus knows if you're naughty or nice, right?"
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Djed Mraz zna kad je netko dobar ili zločest, istina?"
02:30
And my dad said, "Yeah, but, honey,
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I moj tata je rekao, "Da, ali, dušo,
02:32
I think that's technically just between Thanksgiving and Christmas."
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mislim da je to tehnički samo između Dana zahvalnosti i Božića."
02:35
And my mother said, "Oh, Bob, stop it. Let's just tell her.
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I moja majka je rekla, "Ah, Bobe, prestani. Recimo joj.
02:38
I mean, she's seven. Julie, there is no Santa Claus."
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Mislim, ima sedam. Julie, Djed Mraz ne postoji."
02:42
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
02:45
Now, this was actually not that upsetting to me.
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Sad, to me nije toliko uzrujalo.
02:49
My parents had this whole elaborate story about Santa Claus:
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Moji roditelji su imali razrađenu priču o Djedu Mrazu:
02:51
how they had talked to Santa Claus himself and agreed
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kako su osobno razgovarali s Djedom i složili se da,
02:54
that instead of Santa delivering our presents over the night of Christmas Eve,
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umjesto da nam Djed donosi poklone uoči Božića,
02:57
like he did for every other family
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kao što je donosio svakoj drugoj obitelji,
02:59
who got to open their surprises first thing Christmas morning,
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koje su ih otvarale odmah na božićno jutro,
03:02
our family would give Santa more time.
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naša obitelj bi davala Djedu više vremena.
03:05
Santa would come to our house while we were at nine o'clock high mass
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Djed bi dolazio u našu kuću kad bi bili na poldanici
03:08
on Christmas morning, but only if all of us kids did not make a fuss.
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za božićno jutro, ali samo ako mi djeca ne bi galamila.
03:12
Which made me very suspicious.
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Zbog čega sam postala jako sumnjičava.
03:15
It was pretty obvious that it was really our parents giving us the presents.
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Bilo je očito da nam zapravo roditelju daju poklone.
03:19
I mean, my dad had a very distinctive wrapping style,
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Mislim, moj tata je zamatao na poseban način,
03:22
and my mother's handwriting was so close to Santa's.
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i majčin rukopis je jako nalikovao na Djedov.
03:26
Plus, why would Santa save time by having to loop back
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Plus, zašto bi Djed štedio vrijeme na povratku
03:28
to our house after he'd gone to everybody else's?
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u našu kuću nakon što je obišao sve druge?
03:31
There's only one obvious conclusion to reach from this mountain of evidence:
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Postoji samo jedan očit zaključak iz te hrpe dokaza:
03:35
our family was too strange and weird
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naša obitelj je bila previše neobična i čudna
03:38
for even Santa Claus to come visit,
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čak i za Djeda Mraza,
03:40
and my poor parents were trying to protect us from the embarrassment,
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i moji siroti roditelji su nas pokušavali zaštititi od srama,
03:43
this humiliation of rejection by Santa, who was jolly --
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poniženja zbog odbacivanja Djeda, koji je bio veseo.
03:47
but, let's face it, he was also very judgmental.
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No, priznajmo, bio je također vrlo kritičan.
03:50
So, to find out that there was no Santa Claus at all was actually sort of a relief.
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Dakle, otkriti da Djed Mraz uopće ne postoji bilo je zapravo olakšanje.
03:55
I left the kitchen not really in shock about Santa,
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Otišla sam iz kuhinje zapravo ne u šoku zbog Djeda,
03:58
but rather I was just dumbfounded
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no više sam bila samo iznenađena
03:59
about how I could have missed this whole age of reason thing.
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zbog toga kako sam mogla propustiti tu dob razuma.
04:03
It was too late for me, but maybe I could help someone else,
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Bilo je prekasno za mene, no možda sam mogla pomoći nekome drugome,
04:06
someone who could use the information.
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nekome tko je mogao upotrijebiti tu informaciju.
04:08
They had to fit two criteria:
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Morao je ispunjavati dva kriterija:
04:10
they had to be old enough to be able to understand
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morao je biti dovoljno star da razumije
04:12
the whole concept of the age of reason, and not yet seven.
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cijeli koncept doba razuma, i još ne imati sedam.
04:16
The answer was clear: my brother Bill. He was six.
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Odgovor je bio jasan: moj brat Bill. Imao je šest.
04:19
Well, I finally found Bill about a block away from our house
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Napokon sam pronašla Billa blok dalje od naše kuće
04:22
at this public school playground. It was a Saturday,
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na školskom igralištu. Bila je subota,
04:24
and he was all by himself, just kicking a ball against the side of a wall.
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i bio je sam, udarao je loptu o zid.
04:28
I ran up to him and said, "Bill!
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Otrčala sam do njega i rekla, "Bille!
04:30
I just realized that the age of reason starts when you turn seven,
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Upravo sam shvatila da dob razuma počinje kad navršiš sedam,
04:33
and then you're capable of committing any and all sins
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i onda si kadar počiniti grijehe
04:35
against God and man." And Bill said, "So?" And then I said,
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protiv Boga i čovjeka." I Bill je rekao, "Pa?" I tad sam rekla,
04:39
"So, you're six. You have a whole year to do anything you want to
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"Pa, imaš šest. Imaš još cijelu godinu da radiš što želiš
04:43
and God won't notice it." And he said, "So?" And I said,
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i Bog neće primijetiti." Rekao je, "Pa?" I ja sam rekla,
04:47
"So? So everything!" And I turned to run. I was so angry with him.
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"Pa? Pa sve!" Okrenula sam se i potrčala. Bila sam tako ljuta na njega.
04:53
But when I got to the top of the steps, I turned around dramatically
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Ali kad sam došla na vrh stuba, okrenula sam se dramatično
04:55
and said, "Oh, by the way, Bill, there is no Santa Claus."
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i rekla, "Ah, usput, Bille, Djed Mraz ne postoji."
05:00
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
05:02
Now, I didn't know it at the time,
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U to vrijeme nisam znala,
05:04
but I really wasn't turning seven on September 10.
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no zapravo nisam imala rođendan 10-og rujna.
05:07
For my 13th birthday, I planned a slumber party with all of my girlfriends,
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Za svoj 13. rođendan, planirala sam zabavu u pidžamama sa svim svojim prijateljicama,
05:11
but a couple of weeks beforehand my mother took me aside and said,
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no par tjedana ranije moja me majka odvela u stranu i rekla,
05:14
"I need to speak to you privately.
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"Moram razgovarati s tobom u četiri oka.
05:18
September 10 is not your birthday. It's October 10." And I said, "What?"
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Tvoj rođendan nije 10-og rujna, nego 10-og listopada." I ja sam rekla, "Što?"
05:24
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
05:25
And she said, "Listen. The cut-off date to start kindergarten was September 15."
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I ona je rekla, "Slušaj. U vrtić su primali samo one koji su do 15-og rujna dostigli potreban uzrast."
05:33
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
05:34
"So, I told them that your birthday was on September 10,
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"Dakle, rekla sam im da ti je rođendan 10. rujna,
05:37
and then I wasn't sure that you weren't just going to go blab it all over the place,
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i nisam bila sigurna da li ćeš to svima izbrbljati,
05:41
so I started to tell you your birthday was September 10.
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pa sam ti počela govoriti da ti je rođendan 10-og rujna.
05:45
But, Julie, you were so ready to start school, honey. You were so ready."
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No, Julie, bila si spremna da kreneš u školu, dušo. Bila si tako spremna."
05:49
I thought about it, and when I was four,
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Razmislila sam o tome, i kad sam imala četiri,
05:51
I was already the oldest of four children,
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bila sam najstarije od četvero djece,
05:53
and my mother even had another child to come,
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i moja majka je već čekala drugo dijete,
05:55
so what I think she understandably really meant was that she was so ready,
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pa mislim da je očito jasno mislila da je ona bila tako spremna,
05:58
she was so ready. Then she said,
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bila je tako spremna. Zatim je rekla,
06:01
"Don't worry, Julie, every year on October 10 when it was your birthday
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"Ne brini, Julie, svake godine 10. listopada kad je bio tvoj rođendan
06:04
but you didn't realize it, I made sure
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no ti nisi znala, potrudila sam se
06:06
that you ate a piece of cake that day."
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da jedeš tortu taj dan."
06:09
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
06:12
Which was comforting, but troubling.
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Što je bilo utješno, no uznemiravajuće.
06:14
My mother had been celebrating my birthday with me, without me.
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Moja majka je slavila moj rođendan sa mnom, ali bez mene.
06:19
What was so upsetting about this new piece of information
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Ono što me ljutilo u vezi s tom novom informacijom
06:22
was not that I was going to have to change the date of my slumber party
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nije bilo što ću morati mijenjati datum svoje zabave
06:24
with all of my girlfriends,
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sa svim svojim prijateljicama,
06:26
what was most upsetting was that this meant that I was not a Virgo.
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ljutilo me što to znači da nisam Djevica po horoskopu.
06:30
I had a huge Virgo poster in my bedroom,
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Imala sam velik poster Djevice u svojoj sobi,
06:33
and I read my horoscope every single day, and it was so totally me.
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i čitala sam horoskop svaki dan, i sve je o meni bilo točno.
06:38
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
06:40
And this meant that I was a Libra?
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I to je značilo da sam Vaga?
06:42
So, I took the bus downtown to get the new Libra poster.
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Dakle, otišla sam busom u centar po novi poster Vage.
06:46
The Virgo poster is a picture of a beautiful woman with long hair,
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Poster Djevice je bila slika prekrasne žene s dugom kosom,
06:49
sort of lounging by some water,
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koja kao da je lješkarila kraj neke vode,
06:51
but the Libra poster is just a huge scale.
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no poster Vage je samo velika sprava.
06:54
This was around the time that I started filling out physically,
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To je bilo u vrijeme kad sam počela fizički sazrijevati,
06:56
and I was filling out a lot more than a lot of the other girls,
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i sazrijevala sam brže od većine ostalih djevojaka,
06:59
and, frankly, the whole idea that my astrological sign was a scale
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i, iskreno, cijela se ideja da je moj horoskopski znak sprava
07:03
just seemed ominous and depressing.
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činila zloslutno i depresivno.
07:06
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
07:09
But I got the new Libra poster,
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No kupila sam novi poster,
07:11
and I started to read my new Libra horoscope,
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i počela sam čitati novi horoskop,
07:14
and I was astonished to find that it was also totally me.
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i bila sam iznenađena kad sam otkrila da je sve o meni također bilo točno.
07:20
It wasn't until years later, looking back
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Tek godinama kasnije, prisjećajući se
07:22
on this whole age-of-reason/change-of-birthday thing,
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tog doba razuma/promjene rođendana,
07:25
that it dawned on me: I wasn't turning seven
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shvatila sam da nisam navršila sedam
07:27
when I thought I turned seven. I had a whole other month
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kad sam mislila da jesam. Imala sam cijeli drugi mjesec
07:30
to do anything I wanted to before God started keeping tabs on me.
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da radim što želim prije no što me Bog počeo nadzirati.
07:34
Oh, life can be so cruel.
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Ah, život može biti tako okrutan.
07:38
One day, two Mormon missionaries came to my door.
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Jednog dana, dva mormonska misionara došla su na moja vrata.
07:42
Now, I just live off a main thoroughfare in Los Angeles,
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Živim nedaleko od glavne prometnice u Los Angelesu,
07:44
and my block is -- well, it's a natural beginning
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i moj je blok -- pa, prirodni početak
07:47
for people who are peddling things door to door.
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ljudima koji torbare od kuće do kuće.
07:50
Sometimes I get little old ladies from the Seventh Day Adventist Church
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Ponekad dolaze stare gospođe iz Kršćanske adventističke crkve
07:53
showing me these cartoon pictures of heaven.
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koje mi pokazuju sličice raja.
07:55
And sometimes I get teenagers who promise me that they won't join a gang
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Ponekad dolaze tinejdžeri koji obećavaju da se neće pridružiti bandi
07:59
and just start robbing people if I only buy
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i početi pljačkati ljude kad bi se samo pretplatila
08:01
some magazine subscriptions from them.
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na neke časopise preko njih.
08:03
So, normally I just ignore the doorbell, but on this day I answered.
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Dakle, inače ignoriram zvono, no taj sam dan odgovorila.
08:08
And there stood two boys, each about 19,
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I tamo su stajala dva dječaka, od oko 19 godina,
08:10
in white starched short-sleeved shirts, and they had little name tags
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u bijelim uškrobljenim košuljama kratkih rukava, imali su male oznake s imenima
08:14
that identified them as official representatives
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koje su ih identificirale kao službene predstavnike
08:16
of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints,
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Crkve Isusa Krista svetaca posljednjih dana,
08:20
and they said they had a message for me from God.
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i koji su rekli da imaju poruku za mene od Boga.
08:23
I said, "A message for me? From God?" And they said, "Yes."
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Rekla sam, "Poruka za mene? Od Boga?" Odgovorili su, "Da."
08:29
Now, I was raised in the Pacific Northwest,
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Sad, odrasla sam na Pacifičkom sjeverozapadu,
08:31
around a lot of Church of Latter-day Saints people and, you know,
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nedaleko od ljudi Crkve Isusa Krista svetaca i, znate,
08:34
I've worked with them and even dated them,
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radila sam s njima i čak izlazila,
08:36
but I never really knew the doctrine or what they said to people
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ali nikad nisam znala njihovo učenje ili što su govorili ljudima
08:38
when they were out on a mission, and I guess I was, sort of, curious,
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kad su bili na misiji, i pretpostavljam da sam bila nekako znatiželjna
08:41
so I said, "Well, please, come in." And they looked really happy,
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pa sam rekla, "Dobro, molim, uđite." I izgledali su stvarno sretno,
08:44
because I don't think this happens to them all that often.
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zato što ne mislim da im se to događa tako često.
08:47
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
08:49
And I sat them down, and I got them glasses of water --
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Posjela sam ih, donijela čaše vode --
09:03
OK, I got it. I got them glasses of water.
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OK, shvaćam. Donijela sam im čaše vode.
09:06
Don't touch my hair, that's the thing.
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Ne dirajte mi kosu, u tome je stvar.
09:08
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
09:11
You can't put a video of myself in front of me
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Ne možete staviti ekran ispred mene
09:14
and expect me not to fix my hair.
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i očekivati da ne popravljam kosu.
09:16
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
09:17
OK. So I sat them down and I got them glasses of water,
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OK. Posjela sam ih i donijela čaše vode,
09:23
and after niceties they said, "Do you believe that God loves you with all his heart?"
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i nakon izmijenjenih ljubaznosti su rekli, "Da li vjerujete da vas Bog voli svim svojim srcem?"
09:28
And I thought, "Well, of course I believe in God,
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I pomislila sam, "Pa, naravno da vjerujem u Boga,
09:32
but, you know, I don't like that word, heart,
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no, znate, ne volim tu riječ, srce,
09:34
because it anthropomorphizes God,
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zato što humanizira Boga,
09:37
and I don't like the word, 'his,' either, because that sexualizes God."
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i ne volim riječ, svojim, također, jer mu pripisuje spol."
09:41
But I didn't want to argue semantics with these boys,
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No nisam htjela raspravljati o semantici s njima,
09:44
so after a very long, uncomfortable pause, I said
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pa sam nakon jako duge, neugodne pauze, rekla
09:47
"Yes, yes, I do. I feel very loved."
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"Da, da, vjerujem. Osjećam da sam jako voljena."
09:52
And they looked at each other and smiled,
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I pogledali su se i nasmiješili,
09:53
like that was the right answer. And then they said,
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kao da je to ispravan odgovor. I onda su rekli,
09:56
"Do you believe that we're all brothers and sisters on this planet?"
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"Da li vjerujete da smo svi braća i sestre na ovom planetu?"
09:59
And I said, "Yes, I do. Yes, I do." And I was so relieved
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Rekla sam, "Da, da, vjerujem." I osjetila sam takvo olakšanje
10:01
that it was a question I could answer so quickly.
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zato što je to bilo pitanje na koje sam mogla tako brzo odgovoriti.
10:04
And they said, "Well, then we have a story to tell you."
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Rekli su, "Pa, imamo za vas priču."
10:08
And they told me this story all about this guy named Lehi,
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I ispričali su mi o tom čovjeku po imenu Lehi,
10:11
who lived in Jerusalem in 600 BC.
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koji je živio u Jeruzalemu 600.g. pr. Kr..
10:14
Now, apparently in Jerusalem in 600 BC,
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Sad, izgleda da su u Jeruzalemu 600.g. pr. Kr.
10:16
everyone was completely bad and evil. Every single one of them:
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svi bili u potpunosti pokvareni i zli. Svi do jednog:
10:19
man, woman, child, infant, fetus.
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muškarac, žena, dijete, novorođenče, fetus.
10:22
And God came to Lehi and said to him, "Put your family on a boat
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Bog je došao Lehiju i rekao mu, "Ukrcaj svoju obitelj u čamac
10:25
and I will lead you out of here." And God did lead them.
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i izvest ću te odavde." I Bog ga je doista izveo.
10:29
He led them to America.
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Odveo ga je u Ameriku.
10:32
I said, "America? From Jerusalem to America by boat in 600 BC?"
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Rekla sam, "U Ameriku? Iz Jeruzalema u Ameriku u čamcu 600.g. pr. Kr.?"
10:40
And they said, "Yes."
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Rekli su, "Da."
10:42
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
10:44
Then they told me how Lehi and his descendants
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Onda su mi rekli kako su se Lehi i njegovi potomci
10:46
reproduced and reproduced, and over the course of 600 years
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množili i množili, i za 600 godina
10:49
there were two great races of them, the Nephites and the Lamanites,
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nastala su dva velika plemena, Nefiti i Lamaniti,
10:52
and the Nephites were totally, totally good -- each and every one of them --
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i Nefiti su bili posve, posve dobri -- svi do jednog --
10:55
and the Lamanites were totally bad and evil --
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a Lamaniti su bili posve loši i zli --
10:57
every single one of them just bad to the bone.
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svi do jednog i jednostavno pokvareni do srži.
10:59
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
11:00
Then, after Jesus died on the cross for our sins,
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Tada, nakon što je Isus umro na križu za naše grijehe,
11:03
on his way up to heaven he stopped by America and visited the Nephites.
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na putu do neba zaustavio se u Americi i posjetio Nefite.
11:07
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
11:08
And he told them that if they all remained totally, totally good --
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Rekao im je da, ako svi ostanu posve, posve dobri --
11:11
each and every one of them --
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svi do jednog --
11:13
they would win the war against the evil Lamanites.
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pobijedit će u ratu protiv zlih Lamanita.
11:16
But apparently somebody blew it,
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No izgleda da se netko izbrbljao
11:19
because the Lamanites were able to kill all the Nephites.
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zato što su Lamaniti smogli ubiti sve Nefite.
11:21
All but one guy, this guy named Mormon,
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Ali jedan je čovjek po imenu Mormon,
11:23
who managed to survive by hiding in the woods.
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uspio preživjeti skrivajući se u šumi.
11:26
And he made sure this whole story was written down
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I on se pobrinuo da se cijela priča zapiše
11:29
in reformed Egyptian hieroglyphics chiseled onto gold plates,
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reformiranim egipatskim hijeroglifima uklesanima u zlatne ploče,
11:33
which he then buried near Palmyra, New York.
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koje je zatim zakopao blizu Palmyre u saveznoj državi New York.
11:37
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
11:42
Well, I was just on the edge of my seat.
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Pa, jednostavno sam umirala od znatiželje.
11:45
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
11:48
I said, "What happened to the Lamanites?"
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Rekla sam, "Što se dogodilo Lamanitima?"
11:51
And they said, "Well, they became our Native Americans here in the U.S."
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Rekli su, "Pa, postali su Indijanci ovdje u SAD-u."
11:54
And I said, "So, you believe the Native Americans are descended
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I ja sam rekla, "Dakle, vi vjerujete da su Indijanci potomci
11:58
from a people who were totally evil?" And they said, "Yes."
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ljudi koji su bili posve zli?" Rekli su, "Da."
12:02
Then they told me how this guy named Joseph Smith
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Zatim su mi rekli kako je taj čovjek po imenu Joseph Smith
12:05
found those buried gold plates right in his backyard,
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pronašao te zakopane zlatne ploče u svojem dvorištu,
12:09
and he also found this magic stone back there that he put into his hat
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i također je tamo pronašao čaroban kamen koji je stavio u svoj šešir
12:12
and then buried his face into, and this allowed him
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i zatim zakopao unutra svoje lice, što mu je omogućilo
12:15
to translate the gold plates from the reformed Egyptian into English.
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da prevede zlatne ploče s reformiranog egipćanskog na engleski.
12:19
Well, at this point I just wanted to give these two boys
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U tom trenutku samo sam im htjela dati
12:22
some advice about their pitch.
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savjet o njihovoj prezentaciji.
12:24
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
12:27
I wanted to say, "OK, don't start with this story."
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Htjela sam reći, "OK, nemojte početi s tom pričom."
12:34
I mean, even the Scientologists know to start with a personality test before they start --
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Mislim, čak i scijentolozi znaju početi s testom osobnosti prije nego što krenu --
12:39
(Applause)
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(Pljesak)
12:41
-- telling people all about Xenu, the evil intergalactic overlord.
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-- govoriti ljudima sve o Xenuu, zlom intergalaktičkom vladaru.
12:46
Well, then they said, "Do you believe that God speaks to us
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Onda su rekli, "Vjerujete li da nam Bog govori
12:48
through his righteous prophets?" And I said, "No, I don't."
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kroz svoje pravedne proroke?" I ja sam rekla, "Ne, ne vjerujem."
12:51
Because I was, sort of, upset about this Lamanite story
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Zato što sam na neki način bila uzrujana zbog priče o Lamanitima
12:53
and this crazy gold plate story, but the truth was,
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i te lude priče o zlatnoj ploči, no istina je,
12:56
I hadn't really thought this through, so I backpedaled a little and I said,
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da ustvari nisam o tome razmislila, pa sam se malo povukla i rekla,
13:00
"Well, what exactly do you mean by righteous?
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"Na što točno mislite kad kažete pravedan?
13:03
And what do you mean by prophets? Like, could the prophets be women?"
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I kad kažete proroke? Mogu li prorocima biti žene?"
13:07
And they said, "No." And I said, "Why?" And they said,
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Rekli su, "Ne." A ja sam rekla, "Zašto?" Rekli su,
13:11
"Well, it's because God gave women a gift that is so spectacular,
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"Pa, zato što je Bog dao ženama tako spektakularan dar,
13:16
it is so wonderful, that the only gift he had left over to give men
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tako divan, da je jedini dar koji mu je preostao za muškarce
13:21
was the gift of prophecy."
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bio dar proročanstva."
13:24
What is this wonderful gift God gave women, I wondered?
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Koji je to divan dar Bog dao ženama, pitala sam se?
13:26
Maybe their greater ability to cooperate and adapt?
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Možda je to njihova veća sposobnost suradnje i prilagodbe?
13:31
Women's longer lifespan? The fact that women tend to be
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Duži životni vijek? Činjenica da žene
13:34
much less violent than men? But, no, it wasn't any of these gifts.
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manje naginju nasilju od muškaraca? Ali ne, nije bio nijedan od tih darova.
13:38
They said, "Well, it's her ability to bear children."
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Rekli su, "Pa, to je njihova sposobnost da rađaju."
13:41
I said, "Oh, come on. I mean, even if women tried to have a baby
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Rekla sam, "Ma, dajte. Mislim, čak i kad bi žene pokušale imati dijete
13:44
every single year from the time they were 15 to the time they were 45,
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svaku godinu od svoje 15-te do 45-te godine života,
13:48
assuming they didn't die from exhaustion,
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uz pretpostavku da ne umru od iscrpljenosti,
13:50
it still seems like some women would have some time left over
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ipak izgleda da bi nekim ženama preostalo vremena
13:53
to hear the word of God." And they said, "No."
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da čuju riječ Božju." Rekli su, "Ne."
13:57
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
14:00
Well, then they didn't look so fresh-faced and cute to me any more,
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Pa, tad mi više nisu izgledali tako svježe i milo,
14:02
but they had more to say.
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no imali su još nešto za reći.
14:04
They said, "Well, we also believe that if you're a Mormon
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Rekli su, "Pa, mi također vjerujemo da ako si Mormon
14:07
and if you're in good standing with the church, when you die
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i ako si u dobrim odnosima s crkvom, kad umreš
14:09
you get to go to heaven and be with your family for all eternity."
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možeš ići u raj i biti zauvijek sa svojom obitelji."
14:14
And I said, "Oh, dear --
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Rekla sam, "O, bože --
14:16
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
14:23
-- that wouldn't be such a good incentive for me."
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-- to ne bi bio tako dobar motiv za mene."
14:25
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
14:26
And they said, "Oh -- hey, well, we also believe
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Rekli su, "O -- hej, pa, mi također vjerujemo
14:31
that when you go to heaven you get your body restored
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da, kad odeš u raj, dobiješ svoje tijelo vraćeno
14:33
to you in its best original state.
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u svoje najbolje originalno stanje.
14:36
Like, if you'd lost a leg, well, you get it back.
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Npr., ako izgubiš nogu, pa, dobiješ ju nazad.
14:38
Or, if you'd gone blind, you could see."
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Ili, ako si bio slijep, progledaš."
14:40
I said, "Oh -- now, I don't have a uterus because I had cancer
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Rekla sam, "O -- sad, nemam maternicu jer sam imala rak
14:44
a few years ago. So, does this mean that if I went to heaven
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prije nekoliko godina. Dakle, da li to znači da bi u raju
14:47
I would get my old uterus back?" And they said, "Sure."
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dobila svoju maternicu nazad?" Rekli su, "Naravno."
14:51
And I said, "I don't want it back. I'm happy without it." Gosh.
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Rekla sam, "Ne želim ju. Sretna sam bez nje." Bože.
14:57
What if you had a nose job and you liked it?
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Što ako ste imali korekciju nosa i svidjelo vam se?
15:00
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
15:02
Would God force you to get your old nose back?
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Da li bi te Bog prisilio da uzmeš stari nos?
15:05
Well, then they gave me this Book of Mormon,
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Zatim su mi dali tu Mormonovu knjigu
15:07
and they told me to read this chapter and that chapter,
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i rekli mi da pročitam i ovo i ono poglavlje,
15:09
and they said they'd come back some day and check in on me,
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i rekli su da će se jednom vratiti i provjeriti kako mi ide,
15:11
and I think I said something like, "Please don't hurry,"
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mislim da sam rekla nešto kao, "Molim vas da se ne žurite,"
15:13
or maybe it was just, "Please don't," and they were gone.
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ili možda samo, "Molim, nemojte", te su otišli.
15:17
OK, so, I initially felt really superior to these boys,
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OK, u početku sam se osjećala superiorno nad tim dječacima,
15:20
and smug in my more conventional faith. But then,
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i samodopadno u svojoj tradicionalnijoj vjeri. No zatim,
15:23
the more I thought about it, the more I had to be honest with myself.
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što sam više razmišljala o tome, tim više sam morala biti iskrena sa sobom.
15:26
If someone came to my door and I was hearing Catholic theology
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Da netko dođe na moja vrata i slušam katoličku teologiju
15:29
and dogma for the very first time, and they said,
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i dogmu prvi put u životu, i da kažu,
15:32
"We believe that God impregnated a very young girl
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"Mi vjerujemo da je Bog impregnirao vrlo mladu djevojku
15:35
without the use of intercourse,
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bez spolnog odnosa,
15:37
and the fact that she was a virgin is maniacally important to us --
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i činjenica da je bila djevica luđački nam je važna --
15:40
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
15:41
-- and she had a baby, and that's the son of God,"
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-- i rodila je dijete, i to je sin Boga,"
15:44
I mean, I would think that's equally ridiculous.
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mislila bi da je to jednako apsurdno.
15:47
I'm just so used to that story.
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Jednostavno sam se toliko navikla na tu priču.
15:49
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
15:50
So, I couldn't let myself feel condescending towards these boys.
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Nisam si mogla dopustiti da se ponašam snishodljivo prema tim dječacima.
15:53
But the question they asked me when they first arrived
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No pitanje koje su mi postavili kad su došli
15:55
really stuck in my head:
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stvarno mi nije išlo iz glave.
15:57
Did I believe that God loved me with all his heart?
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Da li sam ja vjerovala da me Bog volio svim srcem?
16:01
Because I wasn't exactly sure how I felt about that question.
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Zato što nisam bila sasvim sigurna što osjećam po tom pitanju.
16:03
Now, if they'd asked me,
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Sad, da su me pitali,
16:05
Do you feel that God loves you with all his heart?
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Da li osjećaš da te Bog voli svim svojim srcem?
16:09
Well, that would have been much different, I think I would have instantly answered,
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To je moglo biti puno drugačije, mislim da bi odmah odgovorila,
16:12
"Yes, yes, I feel it all the time. I feel God's love when I'm hurt and confused,
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"Da, da, osjećam to cijelo vrijeme. Osjećam Božju ljubav kad sam povrijeđena i zbunjena,
16:17
and I feel consoled and cared for. I take shelter in God's love
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i osjećam da sam utješena i zbrinuta. Nalazim utočište u Božjoj ljubavi
16:22
when I don't understand why tragedy hits,
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kad ne razumijem zašto se događa tragedija
16:24
and I feel God's love when I look with gratitude at all the beauty I see."
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i osjećam Božju ljubav kad sa zahvalnošću gledam svu ljepotu naokolo."
16:28
But since they asked me that question with the word believe in it,
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No otkad su mi postavili to pitanje s riječi "vjerujem" u njemu,
16:31
somehow it was all different,
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nekako je sve bilo drugačije,
16:33
because I wasn't exactly sure if I believed what I so clearly felt.
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zato što nisam bila sasvim sigurna vjerujem li u ono što sam tako jasno osjećala.
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Julia Sweeney - Actor, comedian, playwrightJulia Sweeney creates comedic works that tackle deep issues: cancer, family, faith.
Why you should listen
Julia Sweeney is a writer, director, actress, comedian and monologist. She is known for being a cast member on Saturday Night Live from 1990 to 1995, where she created and popularized the androgynous character, Pat. She is also well known for her comedic and dramatic monologues. God Said Ha! is a monologue about serious illness, her brother's lymphoma and her own cancer, and her family's crazy reactions to this crisis as they soldiered their way through struggle, confusion and death. This play was performed all over the U.S. and on Broadway at the Lyceum Theater. It was made into a film produced by Quentin Tarantino, and the comedy album from the show was nominated for a Grammy.
Sweeney's second monologue, In the Family Way, played in theatrical runs in New York and Los Angeles. It was ultimately fashioned into a book, a memoir titled If It's Not One Thing, It's Your Mother. Sweeney's third monologue, Letting Go of God, chronicled her journey from Catholicism to atheism. It was made into a film that played on Showtime.
Julia Sweeney | Speaker | TED.com