ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Anne-Marie Slaughter - Public policy thinker
Anne-Marie Slaughter has exploded the conversation around women’s work-life balance.

Why you should listen

Anne-Marie Slaughter has served as the Dean of Princeton’s Woodrow Wilson School of Public and International Affairs, and was the first female Director of Policy Planning for the US Department of State. In late 2013 she left Princeton to assume the presidency of the New America Foundation. With her husband, Slaughter has also raised two sons. And she is on the record saying that integrating her remarkably high-powered career and motherhood was doable when she had the flexibility to control her own schedule, but impossible once she was no longer her own boss.

In a 2012 article for the Atlantic that became the magazine’s most-read ever, Slaughter dismantles the recently-popularized notion that women who fail to “have it all” lack the ambition to do so. Instead, she argues that the way most top jobs are structured, including the expectations of workers regardless of gender, uphold slavish devotion to work above family life or other passions. Creating a more flexible work environment would benefit not just individual women and men, but society as a whole. It is unacceptable, she argues, that a desire to spend time with one’s family should be cause for shame.

More profile about the speaker
Anne-Marie Slaughter | Speaker | TED.com
TEDGlobal 2013

Anne-Marie Slaughter: Can we all "have it all"?

安妮-玛丽.斯洛特(Anne-Marie Slaughter): 我们都能“拥有一切”吗?

Filmed:
1,963,355 views

公共政策专家安妮-玛丽.斯洛特(Anne-Marie Slaughter)2012年的文章《为什么女性依然不能拥有一切》引起了轰动。但事实上,这只是女性的问题吗?在这段演讲中,斯洛特(Slaughter)扩展了她的观点,并解释了为什么在工作文化、公共政策以及社会习俗上的改变会为男性、女性,乃至我们所有人带来更多的平等。
- Public policy thinker
Anne-Marie Slaughter has exploded the conversation around women’s work-life balance. Full bio

Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.

00:12
So my moment时刻 of truth真相
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其实我人生的几个关键拐点
00:14
did not come all at once一旦.
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都不是一下子来临的。
00:17
In 2010, I had the chance机会 to be considered考虑
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2010年,我有个被考虑的机会,
00:21
for promotion提升 from my job工作
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从原来的职位提升为
00:23
as director导向器 of policy政策 planning规划
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美国国务院的
00:25
at the U.S. State Department.
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政策规划负责人。
00:28
This was my moment时刻 to lean in,
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这正是我倚身向前,
00:32
to push myself forward前锋
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推动自己前进的时刻。
00:35
for what are really only a handful少数
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(尤其是)面对只有凤毛麟角的
00:38
of the very top最佳 foreign国外 policy政策 jobs工作,
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最高层外交政策的工作。
00:41
and I had just finished a big, 18-month-月 project项目
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而我也刚好为国务卿希拉里·克林顿
成功地完成了
00:44
for Secretary秘书 Clinton克林顿, successfully顺利,
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一个长达18个月的大项目。
00:46
and I knew知道 I could handle处理 a bigger job工作.
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我知道我能担此重任。
00:50
The woman女人 I thought I was
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我所知道的那个我
00:54
would have said yes.
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会欣然接受这个机会。
00:56
But I had been commuting上下班 for two years年份
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然而,我的丈夫和两个十几岁的儿子
00:58
between之间 Washington华盛顿 and Princeton普林斯顿, New Jersey新泽西,
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居住在新泽西州的普林斯顿市,我已经
01:02
where my husband丈夫 and my two teenage青少年 sons儿子 lived生活,
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在华盛顿特区和普林斯顿之间
来回奔波了两年。
01:06
and it was not going well.
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这种状态并不尽如人意。
01:09
I tried试着 on the idea理念 of eking芯吸 out another另一个 two years年份
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我想着在华盛顿再勉强坚持工作两年,
01:12
in Washington华盛顿, or maybe uprooting连根拔起 my sons儿子
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也许我能让我的儿子们转学,
01:15
from their school学校 and my husband丈夫 from his work
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并让我的丈夫来华盛顿工作,
01:17
and asking them to join加入 me.
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让他们和我一起生活。
01:20
But deep down, I knew知道
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但是,在我的内心深处,我知道
01:23
that the right decision决定 was to go home,
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我应该选择回家,
01:27
even if I didn't fully充分 recognize认识 the woman女人
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即使我不再完全认识
01:29
who was making制造 that choice选择.
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那个下此决定的我。
01:33
That was a decision决定 based基于 on love
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那是一个基于爱
01:37
and responsibility责任.
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和责任的决定。
01:39
I couldn't不能 keep watching观看 my oldest最老的 son儿子
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我无法看着我的大儿子
01:42
make bad choices选择
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在最需要我意见的时候,
01:43
without being存在 able能够 to be there for him
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而我却无法伴其左右,
01:46
when and if he needed需要 me.
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而做出错误的选择。
01:50
But the real真实 change更改 came来了 more gradually逐渐.
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但是,真正的改变是慢慢显现的。
01:53
Over the next下一个 year,
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之后的一年,
01:55
while my family家庭 was righting扶正 itself本身,
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当我的家庭恢复原样后,
01:58
I started开始 to realize实现
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我开始发现
02:00
that even if I could go back into government政府,
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即使我有机会再回政府工作,
02:02
I didn't want to.
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我也不愿意了。
02:04
I didn't want to miss小姐 the last five years年份
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我不愿意失去最后五年
02:08
that my sons儿子 were at home.
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与我的儿子在家相处的时光。
02:11
I finally最后 allowed允许 myself to accept接受
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我最终说服了自己
02:15
what was really most important重要 to me,
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去接受对我最重要的东西,
02:18
not what I was conditioned条件 to want
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那并不是我习以为常的目标,
02:21
or maybe what I conditioned条件 myself to want,
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或是我自我定义的目标。
02:26
and that decision决定 led to a reassessment重新评估
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而那个决定也导致我重新审视
02:31
of the feminist女权主义者 narrative叙述 that I grew成长 up with
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那个自小伴我成长并且我始终捍卫的
02:34
and have always championed倡导.
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女权主义的故事。
02:38
I am still completely全然 committed提交
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我依旧全身心投入于
02:42
to the cause原因 of male-female男女 equality平等,
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争取男女平等的事业,
02:47
but let's think about what that equality平等 really means手段,
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但让我们思考一下平等真正的含义,
02:52
and how best最好 to achieve实现 it.
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以及如何能最好地实现它。
02:55
I always accepted公认 the idea理念
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我总是认为,
02:58
that the most respected尊敬 and powerful强大 people
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在我们社会中最受尊敬和最强大的人
03:01
in our society社会 are men男人 at the top最佳 of their careers职业生涯,
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是那些站在各种职业顶端的男人们,
03:05
so that the measure测量 of male-female男女 equality平等
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所以对于男女平等的计量
03:09
ought应该 to be how many许多 women妇女 are in those positions位置:
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应该是女性在那些职位中所占的数量。
03:14
prime主要 ministers部长, presidents总统, CEOs老总,
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(比如)首相,总统,首席执行官,
03:17
directors董事, managers经理, Nobel诺贝尔 laureates获奖者, leaders领导者.
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总监,经理,诺贝尔奖获奖者,领导者们。
03:22
I still think we should do everything we possibly或者 can
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我也始终坚信,我们应该尽我们所能
03:26
to achieve实现 that goal目标.
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去实现那样的目标。
03:28
But that's only half of real真实 equality平等,
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然而,这只是真正平等的一半。
03:33
and I now think we're never going to get there
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我现在则认为,我们将永远无法实现它,
03:36
unless除非 we recognize认识 the other half.
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除非我们意识到那另一半是什么。
03:42
I suggest建议 that real真实 equality平等,
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我认为真正的、
03:46
full充分 equality平等,
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完全的平等,
03:48
does not just mean valuing价值评估 women妇女
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不是只用男人的准则
03:52
on male terms条款.
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去衡量女性的价值。
03:54
It means手段 creating创建 a much wider更宽的 range范围
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它意味着为女性和男性
03:58
of equally一样 respected尊敬 choices选择
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共同提供更广泛的、
04:02
for women妇女 and for men男人.
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受到同等尊重的选择。
04:05
And to get there, we have to change更改 our workplaces工作场所,
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为了实现这个目标,
我们必须改变我们的工作场所、
04:09
our policies政策 and our culture文化.
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政策方针和文化。
04:12
In the workplace职场,
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在职场中,
04:14
real真实 equality平等 means手段 valuing价值评估 family家庭
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真正的平等是对家庭
04:17
just as much as work,
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和工作给予同样的价值衡量,
04:19
and understanding理解 that the two reinforce加强 each other.
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并懂得两者是相辅相成的。
04:23
As a leader领导 and as a manager经理,
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作为一名领导者以及管理者,
04:25
I have always acted行动 on the mantra口头禅,
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我总是言行合一。
04:28
if family家庭 comes first,
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如果家庭是第一位,
04:31
work does not come second第二 --
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那工作就不是第二位。
04:33
life comes together一起.
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生活是齐头并进的。
04:36
If you work for me, and you have a family家庭 issue问题,
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如果你为我效力,
而又需要解决家庭问题时,
04:40
I expect期望 you to attend出席 to it,
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我希望你去处理它。
04:42
and I am confident信心,
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同时,我有信心,
04:44
and my confidence置信度 has always been borne得紧 out,
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而我的这种信心
总是一再被证明是对的,
04:47
that the work will get doneDONE, and doneDONE better.
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那就是他们不仅会完成自己的工作,
并且做得更出色。
04:51
Workers工人 who have a reason原因 to get home
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那些提出需要回家照顾孩子
04:53
to care关心 for their children孩子 or their family家庭 members会员
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或者其他家人的员工们,
04:56
are more focused重点, more efficient高效,
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(在工作上)更专注,更有效率,
04:59
more results-focused注重结果的.
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并且更加注重结果。
05:01
And breadwinners挣钱养家 who are also caregivers护理人员
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而且那些既要养家糊口、
又要照料家庭的人,
05:04
have a much wider更宽的 range范围
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会有更丰富的经验
05:07
of experiences经验 and contacts往来.
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和交际圈。
05:09
Think about a lawyer律师 who spends part部分 of his time
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试想一个律师,他用一部分时间
05:12
at school学校 events事件 for his kids孩子
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参加他孩子的学校活动,
05:15
talking to other parents父母.
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与其他家长交谈。
05:17
He's much more likely容易 to bring带来 in
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与一个足不出户的律师相比,
05:19
new clients客户 for his firm公司
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他更有可能为他的事务所
05:21
than a lawyer律师 who never leaves树叶 his office办公室.
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引入新的客户。
05:24
And caregiving照顾 itself本身
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另外,照料家庭本身
05:26
develops发展 patience忍耐 --
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能培养耐心-
05:30
a lot of patience忍耐 --
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(而且是)很多的耐心-
05:32
and empathy同情, creativity创造力, resilience弹性, adaptability适应性.
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以及同情心,创造力,恢复力,适应力。
05:38
Those are all attributes属性 that are ever more important重要
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而所有这些特征已然显得更为重要,
05:42
in a high-speed高速, horizontal,
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尤其是在一个高速(运转)、横向化、
05:44
networked联网 global全球 economy经济.
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网络化的全球经济体中。
05:48
The best最好 companies公司 actually其实 know this.
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而最优秀的公司恰恰了解到了这点。
05:51
The companies公司 that win赢得 awards奖项
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那些在美国以(提供)
05:53
for workplace职场 flexibility灵活性 in the United联合的 States状态
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弹性工作场所著称的公司中,
05:56
include包括 some of our most successful成功 corporations公司,
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有不少是我们最成功的公司。
06:00
and a 2008 national国民 study研究
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而一项2008年关于
06:02
on the changing改变 workforce劳动力
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美国劳动力变化的报告
06:04
showed显示 that employees雇员
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也显示,员工
06:06
in flexible灵活 and effective有效 workplaces工作场所
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在有弹性和有效的工作场所中,
06:09
are more engaged订婚 with their work,
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更愿意全情投入他们的工作,
06:11
they're more satisfied满意 and more loyal忠诚,
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他们会更满足和更忠心,
06:13
they have lower降低 levels水平 of stress强调
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他们的压力水平相对较低,
06:15
and higher更高 levels水平 of mental心理 health健康.
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而精神健康水平则相对较高。
06:18
And a 2012 study研究 of employers雇主
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另一项2012年关于雇主的研究
06:21
showed显示 that deep, flexible灵活 practices做法
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进一步显示,灵活的操作
06:24
actually其实 lowered降低 operating操作 costs成本
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实际上降低了(公司的)经营成本,
06:26
and increased增加 adaptability适应性
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并加强了(公司的)适应能力,
06:29
in a global全球 service服务 economy经济.
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(尤其是)在全球服务经济下。
06:32
So you may可能 think
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所以你可能会想,
06:35
that the privileging特权化 of work over family家庭
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将工作先于家庭的理念
06:39
is only an American美国 problem问题.
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仅仅只是我们美国人的问题。
06:43
Sadly可悲的是, though虽然, the obsession困扰 with work
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不过遗憾的是,沉迷于工作
06:47
is no longer a uniquely独特地 American美国 disease疾病.
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已不再是一种美国独有的病态现象。
06:50
Twenty二十 years年份 ago,
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二十年前,
06:52
when my family家庭 first started开始 going to Italy意大利,
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我们一家第一次去意大利时,
06:54
we used to luxuriate过奢侈的生活 in the culture文化 of siesta午休.
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我们尽情享受了那里的午休文化。
06:57
Siesta午休 is not just about avoiding避免 the heat of the day.
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午休不仅仅只是为了避开一天中炎热的时间,
07:00
It's actually其实 just as much
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它其实恰恰
07:02
about embracing拥抱 the warmth热情 of a family家庭 lunch午餐.
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包含了享受一顿温暖的家庭午餐。
07:05
Now, when we go, fewer and fewer businesses企业
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现在,当我们再去意大利,
越来越少的公司
07:08
close for siesta午休,
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会为了午休而暂停营业,
07:10
reflecting反映 the advance提前 of global全球 corporations公司
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这反应出了全球企业的推进
07:14
and 24-hour-小时 competition竞争.
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以及24小时化的竞争。
07:17
So making制造 a place地点 for those we love
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因此,为我们所爱的人留出空间
07:19
is actually其实 a global全球 imperative势在必行.
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实际上是一种全球性使命。
07:23
In policy政策 terms条款,
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在政策方面,
07:26
real真实 equality平等 means手段 recognizing认识
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真正的平等意味着承认
07:29
that the work that women妇女 have traditionally传统 doneDONE
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那些传统意义上女性所从事的工作,
07:32
is just as important重要
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其重要性等同于
07:34
as the work that men男人 have traditionally传统 doneDONE,
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那些传统意义上男性们从事的工作,
07:37
no matter who does it.
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无论是谁在从事它。
07:40
Think about it: Breadwinning养家糊口 and caregiving照顾
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思考一下,养家糊口和照料家庭
07:44
are equally一样 necessary必要 for human人的 survival生存.
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都是人类生存所必需的。
07:47
At least最小 if we get beyond a barter物物交换 economy经济,
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至少,一旦我们超越了以物换物的经济模式,
07:51
somebody has to earn an income收入
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总得有人赚取收入,
07:53
and someone有人 else其他 has to convert兑换 that income收入
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另外得有人将那些收入转化为
07:56
to care关心 and sustenance营养 for loved喜爱 ones那些.
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照料和维持家人的生计。
08:00
Now most of you, when you hear me
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而现在,当你们大部分的人在听我
08:02
talk about breadwinning养家糊口 and caregiving照顾,
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讨论关于养家糊口和照料家庭的时候,
08:04
instinctively本能 translate翻译 those categories类别
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你们本能地将这两类工作
08:08
into men's男装 work and women's女士的 work.
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分别理解为男人的工作和女人的工作。
08:12
And we don't typically一般 challenge挑战
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另外,我们通常也不会质疑
08:14
why men's男装 work is advantaged优势.
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为什么男性的工作显得更得天独厚。
08:18
But consider考虑 a same-sex同性 couple一对
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然而,想像一下一对同性伴侣,
08:21
like my friends朋友 Sarah莎拉 and Emily艾米莉.
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比如我的朋友萨拉和艾米丽。
08:23
They're psychiatrists精神科医生.
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她们是精神科医生。
08:25
They got married已婚 five years年份 ago,
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她们5年前结婚,
08:27
and now they have two-year-old二十岁 twins双胞胎.
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现在有一对两岁的双胞胎。
08:30
They love being存在 mothers母亲,
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她们热爱作为母亲的角色,
08:32
but they also love their work,
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但她们也热爱自己从事的工作,
08:34
and they're really good at what they do.
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而且她们在工作上确实很出色。
08:36
So how are they going to divide划分 up
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那她们将如何分配
08:38
breadwinning养家糊口 and caregiving照顾 responsibilities责任?
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养家糊口和照料家庭的职责呢?
08:40
Should one of them stop working加工
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她们中的一位是否应该不工作
08:42
or reduce减少 hours小时 to be home?
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或者减少工作时间呆在家里?
08:45
Or should they both change更改 their practices做法
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又或者她们应该同时更换工作?
08:48
so they can have much more flexible灵活 schedules时间表?
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这样她们就能有更多灵活的时间了?
08:51
And what criteria标准 should they use
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她们应该依据怎样的标准
08:53
to make that decision决定?
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来做决定呢?
08:54
Is it who makes品牌 the most money
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是谁赚的钱更多?
08:56
or who is most committed提交 to her career事业?
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还是谁的事业心更重呢?
09:00
Or who has the most flexible灵活 boss老板?
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抑或是谁的老板更变通呢?
09:04
The same-sex同性 perspective透视 helps帮助 us see
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同性伴侣的案例让我们了解到,
09:08
that juggling戏法 work and family家庭
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同时工作并照顾家庭
09:10
are not women's女士的 problems问题,
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并不是女性的矛盾,
09:12
they're family家庭 problems问题.
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而是家庭的矛盾。
09:15
And Sarah莎拉 and Emily艾米莉 are the lucky幸运 ones那些,
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萨拉和艾米丽是幸运的,
09:18
because they have a choice选择
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因为她们可以选择
09:20
about how much they want to work.
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她们的工作时长。
09:22
Millions百万 of men男人 and women妇女
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数以百万的男女
09:25
have to be both breadwinners挣钱养家 and caregivers护理人员
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既要养家糊口又得照料家庭,
09:28
just to earn the income收入 they need,
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只为赚取赖以生计的收入,
09:32
and many许多 of those workers工人 are scrambling扰码.
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很多人只能勉强度日。
09:35
They're patching修补 together一起 care关心 arrangements安排
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他们相互拼凑时间来照料家庭,
09:37
that are inadequate不足
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而这是不够的,
09:39
and often经常 actually其实 unsafe不安全.
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并且往往是不安全的。
09:41
If breadwinning养家糊口 and caregiving照顾 are really equal等于,
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如果养家糊口和照料家庭是真正一致的,
09:46
then why shouldn't不能 a government政府
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那为什么政府
09:47
invest投资 as much in an infrastructure基础设施 of care关心
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没有向作为健康社会为根基的
09:51
as the foundation基础 of a healthy健康 society社会
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福利基础设施方面进行投资?
09:55
as it invests投资 in physical物理 infrastructure基础设施
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就像往作为成功经济为支柱的
09:58
as the backbone骨干 of a successful成功 economy经济?
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物质基础设施方面,进行一样多的投入?
10:02
The governments政府 that get it --
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有些政府意识到了-
10:04
no surprises惊喜 here --
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毫无疑问-
10:06
the governments政府 that get it,
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那些意识到这点的政府
10:08
Norway挪威, Sweden瑞典, Denmark丹麦, the Netherlands荷兰,
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像挪威、瑞典、丹麦和荷兰。
10:13
provide提供 universal普遍 child儿童 care关心,
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他们提供广泛的儿童福利保障,
10:16
support支持 for caregivers护理人员 at home,
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为在家的照料家庭的一方提供资助,
10:18
school学校 and early childhood童年 education教育,
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提供学校和儿童时期的学前早教,
10:21
protections保护 for pregnant women妇女,
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为怀孕期妇女提供保障,
10:23
and care关心 for the elderly老年 and the disabled.
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并且为老年人和残疾人提供护理。
10:27
Those governments政府 invest投资 in that infrastructure基础设施
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这些政府在那些基础设施方面的投资
10:31
the same相同 way they invest投资 in roads道路 and bridges桥梁
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与他们在道路、桥梁、
10:34
and tunnels隧道 and trains火车.
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隧道和铁路等(基础设施)方面的投资一致。
10:38
Those societies社会 also show显示 you
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这些社会同时也证明
10:40
that breadwinning养家糊口 and caregiving照顾
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养家糊口和照料家庭
10:42
reinforce加强 each other.
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是相辅相成的。
10:45
They routinely常规 rank among其中 the top最佳 15 countries国家
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这些国家常年排在全球
10:51
of the most globally全球 competitive竞争的 economies经济,
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最具竞争力的经济体中的前15名,
10:54
but at the same相同 time,
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但与此同时,
10:56
they rank very high on the OECD经合组织 Better Life Index指数.
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他们在经济合作和发展组织(OECD)的
“美好生活指数”排名中也名列前茅。
11:00
In fact事实, they rank higher更高 than other governments政府,
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事实上,他们比其他一些国家的排位要更高,
11:04
like my own拥有, the U.S., or Switzerland瑞士,
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比如像我的国家,美国或瑞士,
11:06
that have higher更高 average平均 levels水平 of income收入
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这些国家有较高平均收入水平,
11:09
but lower降低 rankings排名 on work-life工作生活 balance平衡.
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但较低“事业-生活”平衡水平。
11:15
So changing改变 our workplaces工作场所
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所以,改变我们的工作场所,
11:18
and building建造 infrastructures基础设施 of care关心
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并建立福利保障基础设施
11:21
would make a big difference区别,
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将会大有不同,
11:23
but we're not going to get equally一样 valued价值 choices选择
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但我们还是无法获得同等价值的选择,
11:27
unless除非 we change更改 our culture文化,
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除非我们改变我们的文化,
11:30
and the kind of cultural文化 change更改 required需要
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而这种文化变革上的诉求
11:33
means手段 re-socializing再社会化 men男人.
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意味着要对人重新社会化。
11:35
(Applause掌声)
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(掌声)
11:39
Increasingly日益 in developed发达 countries国家,
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在越来越多的发达国家,
11:41
women妇女 are socialized社会化 to believe that our place地点
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社会的认知使女性相信,
11:44
is no longer only in the home,
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我们的舞台不再仅仅局限在家中,
11:48
but men男人 are actually其实 still where they always were.
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但男性事实上仍然留在他们原来的位置。
11:52
Men男人 are still socialized社会化 to believe
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社会的认知让他们依旧坚信,
11:56
that they have to be breadwinners挣钱养家,
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他们必须成为养家糊口的人,
11:58
that to derive派生 their self-worth自我价值
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这种认识使他们
12:01
from how high they can climb over other men男人
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通过在职业生涯中超越其他男性
12:04
on a career事业 ladder阶梯.
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来获得自尊。
12:06
The feminist女权主义者 revolution革命 still has a long way to go.
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女权主义的革命道路仍然长路漫漫。
12:09
It's certainly当然 not complete完成.
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她肯定还没有完成。
12:11
But 60 years年份 after
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然而,
12:13
"The Feminine女人
Mystique奥秘" was published发表,
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在《女性的奥秘》出版60年后,
12:15
many许多 women妇女 actually其实 have
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许多女性实际上获得了
12:17
more choices选择 than men男人 do.
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比男性更多的选择。
12:20
We can decide决定 to be a breadwinner养家糊口的人,
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我们可以选择养家糊口,
12:23
a caregiver护理人员, or any combination组合 of the two.
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照料家庭,亦或者兼而为之。
12:27
When a man, on the other hand,
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但另一方面,当一位男性
12:30
decides决定 to be a caregiver护理人员,
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选择照料家庭,
12:32
he puts看跌期权 his manhood男子气概 on the line线.
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他就把自己的男子气概放在了悬崖边。
12:36
His friends朋友 may可能 praise赞美 his decision决定,
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他的朋友们可能会称赞他的决定,
12:39
but underneath, they're scratching搔抓 their heads.
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但他们心底一定快抓狂了。
12:43
Isn't the measure测量 of a man
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难道衡量一个男人的价值,
12:46
his willingness愿意 to compete竞争 with other men男人
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不就是看他为了权力和声望
12:49
for power功率 and prestige声望?
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去与其他男人竞争的雄心壮志么?
12:51
And as many许多 women妇女 hold保持 that view视图 as men男人 do.
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而且持有这种观点的女性
和男性同样多。
12:55
We know that lots of women妇女
255
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我们知道许多女性
12:58
still judge法官 the attractiveness吸引力 of a man
256
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在判断一位男性是否有魅力时,
13:02
based基于 in large part部分 on how successful成功 he is
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仍然将其事业上有多成功
13:04
in his career事业.
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作为绝大部分的衡量基础。
13:06
A woman女人 can drop下降 out of the work force
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一位离开了职场的女性
13:08
and still be an attractive有吸引力 partner伙伴.
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仍然可以成为一个有魅力的伴侣。
13:10
For a man, that's a risky有风险 proposition主张.
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但如果是男人,那会是个有风险的提议。
13:15
So as parents父母 and partners伙伴,
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所以作为家长和妻子,
13:17
we should be socializing社交 our sons儿子
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我们应该让我们的儿子和丈夫
13:20
and our husbands丈夫
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在认识和适应社会的过程中,
13:23
to be whatever随你 they want to be,
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选择他们想要扮演的角色,
13:26
either caregivers护理人员 or breadwinners挣钱养家.
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无论是照料家庭还是赚钱养家。
13:30
We should be socializing社交 them to make caregiving照顾
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我们应该让他们认识到,男人照料家庭
13:33
cool for guys.
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是一件很棒的事情。
13:35
(Applause掌声)
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(掌声)
13:39
I can almost几乎 hear lots of you thinking思维, "No way."
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我几乎可以听到你们很多人
心里在想,“没门儿”。
13:45
But in fact事实, the change更改 is
actually其实 already已经 happening事件.
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但事实上,这种改变已经在发生。
13:50
At least最小 in the United联合的 States状态,
272
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至少在美国,
13:52
lots of men男人 take pride自豪 in cooking烹饪,
273
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许多男人对于自己烹饪引以为傲,
13:54
and frankly坦率地说 obsess缠住 over stoves炉具.
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并坦诚自己热衷于此。
13:57
They are in the birthing分娩 rooms客房.
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他们会呆在产房里、
14:00
They take paternity亲子鉴定 leave离开 when they can.
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然后尽可能的休育婴假。
14:03
They can walk步行 a baby宝宝 or soothe缓和 a toddler幼儿
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他们会自己带着小婴儿,
或牵着刚学步的小孩散步,
14:05
just as well as their wives妻子 can,
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就和他们的妻子干得一样出色,
14:08
and they are increasingly日益
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而且他们包揽
14:10
doing much more of the housework家务.
280
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越来越多的家务活。
14:12
Indeed确实, there are male college学院 students学生们 now
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事实上,现在有些男性大学生
14:14
who are starting开始 to say,
282
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1527
开始说:
14:16
"I want to be a stay-at-home呆在家里 dad."
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“我要做一个全职爸爸。”
14:18
That was completely全然 unthinkable不可思议的
284
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这在50年前甚至30年前
14:20
50 or even 30 years年份 ago.
285
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完全是难以置信的。
14:23
And in Norway挪威, where men男人 have
286
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2891
在挪威,那里的男性
14:26
an automatic自动 three month's一个月 paternity亲子鉴定 leave离开,
287
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自动享受为期三个月的育婴假,
14:29
but they lose失去 it if they decide决定 not to take it,
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但如果他们选择不使用育婴假,
那这个假期就没有了。
14:32
a high government政府 official官方 told me
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1925
一位政府的高层官员告诉我,
14:34
that companies公司 are starting开始 to look
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2232
现在一些公司开始从这个角度来判断
14:36
at prospective预期 male employees雇员
291
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2085
他们男性员工的未来,
14:38
and raise提高 an eyebrow if they didn't in fact事实
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并且会不满地竖起眉毛,如果
14:42
take their leave离开 when they had kids孩子.
293
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在孩子出生时,他们没有使用育婴假。
14:45
That means手段 that it's starting开始 to seem似乎
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这就意味着这似乎开始成为
14:47
like a character字符 defect缺陷
295
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一种负面的品质,
14:50
not to want to be a fully充分 engaged订婚 father父亲.
296
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(让人认为)此人是位不称职的父亲。
14:57
So I was raised上调
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我从小到大
15:02
to believe that championing拥护 women's女士的 rights权利
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相信保卫女性权利
15:06
meant意味着 doing everything we could
299
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就是尽我们一切所能
15:08
to get women妇女 to the top最佳.
300
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1774
让女性站在巅峰。
15:10
And I still hope希望 that I live生活 long enough足够
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2719
而我仍然希望我能活着看到,
15:13
to see men男人 and women妇女 equally一样 represented代表
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所有阶级的劳动力
15:16
at all levels水平 of the work force.
303
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都实现男女平等的一天。
15:19
But I've come to believe that we have to value family家庭
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4099
但是我开始相信,
我们必须珍惜我们家庭的
15:23
every一切 bit as much as we value work,
305
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2832
一点一滴,
就如同我们重视我们的工作一样。
15:26
and that we should entertain招待 the idea理念
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2512
而且我们应该思考并明白,
15:28
that doing right by those we love
307
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3549
好好对待我们所爱的人
15:32
will make all of us better at everything we do.
308
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会让我们在做其他任何事情上更出色。
15:36
Thirty三十 years年份 ago, Carol颂歌 Gilligan吉利根,
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30年前,卡罗尔.吉利根(Carol Gilligan),
15:38
a wonderful精彩 psychologist心理学家, studied研究 adolescent青少年 girls女孩
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2957
一位出色的心理学家,她通过研究青春期少女
15:41
and identified确定 an ethic伦理 of care关心,
311
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3057
确认了关怀伦理
15:44
an element元件 of human人的 nature性质 every一切 bit as important重要
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3155
作为一种人性本质,
15:47
as the ethic伦理 of justice正义.
313
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1987
与正义伦理同样重要。
15:49
It turns out that "you don't care关心"
314
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3305
这就派生出“你不关心”
15:52
is just as much a part部分 of who we are
315
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2921
在我们部分的观念中,
15:55
as "that's not fair公平."
316
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2280
与“那不公平”是一样的。
15:58
Bill法案 Gates盖茨 agrees同意.
317
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1800
比尔.盖茨(Bill Gates)表示同意。
15:59
He argues主张 that the two great forces军队 of human人的 nature性质
318
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3171
他认为人性中两股伟大的力量
16:03
are self-interest自我利益 and caring爱心 for others其他.
319
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4207
是利己和关爱他人。
16:07
Let's bring带来 them both together一起.
320
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2642
那就让我们将两者放在一起。
16:09
Let's make the feminist女权主义者 revolution革命
321
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2659
让我们把女权主义革命变成
16:12
a humanist以人为本 revolution革命.
322
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2732
人道主义革命。
16:15
As whole整个 human人的 beings众生,
323
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1744
对所有人类来说,
16:17
we will be better caregivers护理人员 and breadwinners挣钱养家.
324
965107
3844
我们能更好地照料家庭和养家糊口。
16:20
You may可能 think that can't happen发生,
325
968951
2108
你可能会认为这不可能发生,
16:23
but I grew成长 up in a society社会
326
971059
1700
但我在这样一个社会长大:
16:24
where my mother母亲 put out small vases花瓶
327
972759
2346
我的母亲会为了晚餐聚会
16:27
of cigarettes香烟 for dinner晚餐 parties派对,
328
975105
2662
摆上小型烟雾化器,
16:29
where blacks黑人 and whites白人 used separate分离 bathrooms浴室,
329
977767
4193
黑人和白人用分开的卫生间,
16:33
and where everybody每个人 claimed声称 to be heterosexual异性.
330
981960
5530
每个人都声称自己是异性恋。
16:40
Today今天, not so much.
331
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4439
而现在,(这些)都不再普遍。
16:45
The revolution革命 for human人的 equality平等
332
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3640
为争取人类平等的革命
16:48
can happen发生.
333
996681
1790
会发生的。
16:50
It is happening事件.
334
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2246
事实上,它正在发生着。
16:52
It will happen发生.
335
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2282
它比将发生。
16:54
How far and how fast快速 is up to us.
336
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到什么程度以及会有多快
都取决于我们自己。
16:59
Thank you.
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谢谢大家。
17:01
(Applause掌声)
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4000
(掌声)
Translated by SiYan Yao
Reviewed by Shiwen He

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ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Anne-Marie Slaughter - Public policy thinker
Anne-Marie Slaughter has exploded the conversation around women’s work-life balance.

Why you should listen

Anne-Marie Slaughter has served as the Dean of Princeton’s Woodrow Wilson School of Public and International Affairs, and was the first female Director of Policy Planning for the US Department of State. In late 2013 she left Princeton to assume the presidency of the New America Foundation. With her husband, Slaughter has also raised two sons. And she is on the record saying that integrating her remarkably high-powered career and motherhood was doable when she had the flexibility to control her own schedule, but impossible once she was no longer her own boss.

In a 2012 article for the Atlantic that became the magazine’s most-read ever, Slaughter dismantles the recently-popularized notion that women who fail to “have it all” lack the ambition to do so. Instead, she argues that the way most top jobs are structured, including the expectations of workers regardless of gender, uphold slavish devotion to work above family life or other passions. Creating a more flexible work environment would benefit not just individual women and men, but society as a whole. It is unacceptable, she argues, that a desire to spend time with one’s family should be cause for shame.

More profile about the speaker
Anne-Marie Slaughter | Speaker | TED.com

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