Amy Green: A video game to cope with grief
에이미 그린(Amy Green): 슬픔을 극복하기 위한 비디오 게임
Amy Green creates narrative video games that focus on innovative stories. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
huddled around a cell phone
of the Game Awards,
중계를 보고 있었습니다.
industry's biggest nights.
행사가 열린 밤이었죠.
for the Game for Impact,
수상작을 발표하는 순서가 되었어요.
to a thought-provoking video game
message or meaning.
이름을 호명했습니다.
that winning an award like that
될 거라고 늘 생각해 왔는데
have stuck with me,
밤에 대한 기억은 제 안에 남아서
영향을 주고 있습니다.
with a rare and aggressive brain tumor.
치명적인 뇌종양 진단을 받았습니다.
that his tumor had returned
and radiation that they could offer him.
방사선 치료에도 불구하고 말이죠.
had perhaps four months to live,
끔찍한 소리를 들은 그날 밤에
my two older sons in bed --
함께 침대에 누웠습니다.
how much they understood,
잘 몰랐어요.
들려주기 시작했습니다.
very brave knight named Joel
a terrible dragon called cancer.
싸우는 모험담을 들려주었죠.
more of the story,
더 들려주었지만
that they could understand
would be answered
have to tell them that that knight,
차마 할 수 없었어요.
finish that bedtime story.
끝내지 않아도 됐습니다.
to palliative treatment,
기대 이상으로 잘 견뎌냈고
몇 년을 함께 해 주어서
our dying child with all of our hearts.
기울이는 법을 배울 수 있었습니다.
that shameful feeling
아끼려 했다는
just a little pain
본능을 이겨냈습니다.
even if that love could crush us.
조엘은 사랑받을만 했기 때문입니다.
vulnerability has changed me ...
바꾸어 놓았습니다.
그럴 순 없었을 거예요.
생활하기 시작했습니다.
called "That Dragon, Cancer."
게임을 개발하기 시작했습니다.
in the shadow of death.
희망을 찾아가는 이야기죠.
with doubt is a part of faith --
현실에 관한 이야기입니다.
do you like that?
아빠: 뛰어다니고 싶니?
[암이라는 이름의 용]
게임을 즐길 때
into a witness of Joel's life,
목격하게 됩니다.
we as a family felt and experienced.
경험을 발견하게 됩니다.
like analyzing interactive poetry
느낌이 들 수도 있어요.
구성되어 있기 때문이죠.
게임 내용을 설계하면서
were trying to express and why,
플레이어가 더 많이 알아가고자 할수록
that Joel taught us,
상처받기 쉬운 우리의 모습을
to offer them branching narrative
이야기 전개의 분기점을 만나게 되고
that they make feels important
달라질 거라 기대하죠.
of game design,
무의미하게 만들었습니다.
that will change the outcome for Joel.
바꾸지는 못한다는 걸 알게 되죠.
as deeply and desperately as we felt it
깊은 절망감을 느끼게 됩니다.
in our arms praying for hours,
몇 시간 동안이나 기도를 하며
that we could not create for ourselves.
부여잡는 것과 같은 느낌일 겁니다.
생각은 전혀 없었지만
that really change our lives,
of our hardship -- and not our glory.
끝난 뒤입니다.
생각이 들었을 떄
through our video game --
저의 열정과 가능성은
and I helped direct scenes.
게임 장면 제작에도 참여했죠.
a video game is telling a story,
전하는 것과 같다는 걸 깨달았습니다.
and symbolism are there,
with player agency
in a totally new way to do it,
that without Joel.
얘기하려 했다는 점에서
of terminal cancer through a video game.
like so many people before you:
이런 생각마저 하고 계실지 모르죠.
to any pediatric cancer parent
and blown it up into a balloon,
into a rocket ship,
through the hospital halls
경주용 자동차를 운전하듯이
experiences something traumatic,
정신적 충격을 받을 일이 닥친다면
that their life feels like a game
더 많은 노력을 기울이게 되죠.
explore their worlds through play.
세상을 탐험하기 때문입니다.
many things from a family,
많은 것을 앗아간다 하더라도
and you're trying to imagine this family
죽어가는 아이를 중심으로
around a dying child,
장면을 상상하지만
as part of that picture,
to share our story with you,
제대로 전달된 것입니다.
힘들었던 시기였거든요.
experienced since.
느낀 적도 없습니다.
to share that world
그 세상을 공유하고 싶었습니다.
experienced it before,
that world until it became ours.
전에는 결코 상상할 수 없으니까요.
to invest emotionally
마음을 단단히 먹어야 합니다.
will break their hearts.
상처를 입게 될 테니까요.
with a new and a deeper compassion --
더 깊은 연민으로 치유되었습니다.
and try to help tell them
속내를 털어 놓도록 해서
해주고픈 욕망이 생겼죠.
won the Game for Impact Award,
영향력있는 게임상을 받은 그날 밤
that we shared with him
조엘과 함께 했던 그 많은 밤들
about life and love and faith and purpose.
많은 것을 가르쳐 주었습니다.
as even a single photograph of my son,
조엘의 사진 한 장에도 미치지 못해요.
who his life has impacted,
영향을 받은 모든 이를 의미합니다.
even though they never met him.
조엘이 그립다는 내용이죠.
that they've shed for my son,
눈물을 흘렸다고도 해요.
just a little bit lighter
조금이나마 덜 수 있었던 때는
with a 10-year-old
조엘의 사연을 접했다는 걸 알았을 때나
with a smartphone,
즐겼다는 의사 선생님이나
to her first-year philosophy students.
얘기를 들었을 때입니다.
we could ever accomplish.
우리를 더 많이 변화시키기 때문이죠.
I could ever see come true.
비극이었습니다.
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Amy Green - Video game designerAmy Green creates narrative video games that focus on innovative stories.
Why you should listen
Amy Green writes and designs video games for Numinous Games, whose first title, That Dragon, Cancer, was an intimate autobiography of the life and death of her son Joel Green. Along with her husband and a team of six other developers, she used a video game to artistically portray the surreal emotional landscape of raising a child with a terminal illness. In May 2017, the Peabody Media Center and the University of Georgia awarded That Dragon, Cancer a Peabody-Facebook Futures of Media Award for Best Video Game.
Green's current project, Untethered, is an episodic virtual reality mystery that allows the player to speak out loud to the characters within the game. These characters speak back to the player, including the player as an integral character in the quirky story that is being told in the game.
Green's work with Numinous Games has been recognized by the British Academy of Film and Television Arts, South by Southwest, Games for Change, the Independent Game Developers Association, the Game Awards and has been featured in press coverage by the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, Wired Magazine, Popular Science, RadioLab, CBS Sunday Morning, the BBC and the Guardian.
Amy Green | Speaker | TED.com