Michelle Knox: Talk about your death while you're still healthy
米歇尔·诺克斯: 在健康的时讨论死亡
Westpac's Michelle Knox has led large-scale transformation programs in the UK, Ireland and Australia. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
we are all going to experience:
to acknowledge death,
不想承认死亡
the most important people in our lives.
最重要的人们讨论它
where people got old or sick
其中人们老去或得病
looking sad and drained,
看上去难过且精疲力尽
and of the grieving process.
还有吊唁流程
其于我就像一位阿姨
and did my first reading.
并首次读了颂词
and the dryness in my mouth was normal.
和嘴中的干燥是正常的
and it made me really angry.
而这让我非常生气
she still mowed her own lawn,
她还在自己修剪草坪
in her front yard
have chosen for her eulogy.
as part of day-to-day living,
像是日常生活的一部分的话
to reflect on our core values,
can make informed decisions
可以作出有依据的决定
of having failed to honor our legacy.
的恐惧和遗憾
culturally diverse team,
了不起的、多元文化的团队
who died at 41 from bowel cancer.
因大肠癌在41岁去世了
open and frank conversations
cultural backgrounds,
some significant differences
the passing of a loved one.
is "Sorry Business,"
and Torres Strait Islander people.
specific roles and responsibilities,
the use of photographs,
for a peaceful transition of the spirit.
并且允许灵魂的安详转移
in Western cultures,
the memory of a loved one
and sharing photographs.
if we talked about death now,
如果我们现在就谈论死亡
until we are too emotional,
我们等到变得太感性的时候
of our finale on this earth?
掌控自己结局的主权的时候吗?
or an informal party,
还是非正式聚会
there's so much to discuss,
有那么多事情要讨论
can help you experience a good death,
可以帮助你死得其所
on your loved ones;
support those who are grieving.
帮助我们安慰那些悼念者
of adults over the age of 18
18岁以上的成年人
be quite simple and inexpensive.
挺简单而且便宜的
my friends and neighbors
many of them don't have a will,
他们许多人没有遗嘱
they need individual wills.
他们需要个人遗嘱
it's all going to go to my partner anyway.
那总归会是我配偶的
and country to country,
in New South Wales
must be appointed
遗产管理人必须由
who would never have met the deceased.
for arranging your funeral,
after paying debts and taxes.
债款和税务之后分配它们
will be the bill for their services.
他们的服务账单
wooden giraffe in your living room
四脚木质长颈鹿
carry it halfway across the world,
跨越半个世界运它过来的人
or a domestic partner,
they will receive your estate,
it's far more complicated,
这就复杂的多
and dependents all come into play.
和受抚养者都会有影响
a regular donation to charity,
你定期向慈善机构捐款
to make a claim on your estate?
有资格获得你的遗产?
is the bigger your estate,
你的遗产越多
我请问你
to the government
to a progressive lung disease.
失去了我的父亲
not choking or gasping for air.
were able to support dad's wishes,
我家能够支持老爸的愿望
pretty tough conversations
from resuscitation to organ donation.
从抢救到器官捐赠
organs you can use."
was deteriorating rapidly,
to talk about organ donation.
讨论器官捐赠的正确时机
when we are fit and healthy,
强壮且健康的时候讨论这些问题
not just what is important,
什么是重要的
to find out their thoughts on death,
参与来发现他们对于死亡的想法
a "Death Over Dinner,"
to introduce the topic ...
方法来介绍主题
has to be legally disposed of,
被合法地处理掉
are burial and cremation,
your body to science.
that innovation has touched
创新已经拓展到了
或是柳条筐里
that will dissolve at sea.
flung into a huge ocean swell.
更坏的事了
in the rose garden next to my dad.
我老爸旁边买了个墓地
how to experience a healthy bereavement
妥善处理丧亲过程
to honor your legacy.
没能尊重你的遗愿的愧疚
I've been to seminars,
我曾经去过研讨会
to palliative care nurses.
of not talking about death,
if we talk about death more,
如果我们更多地谈论死亡
the emotions we experience around grief.
经历悲痛的情感
to help someone exit this life,
是一种荣幸
is heavy with loss and sadness,
I could support his wishes.
我可以支持他的愿望
were in a peaceful coma,
在安详的昏迷中度过
握住他的手
just before breakfast,
就在早餐之前
and I ate a big bowl of porridge.
然后我吃了一大碗粥
they were really shocked.
他们非常震惊
and my ability to concentrate,
和我的集中注意能力
I was always hungry.
我一直都很饿
that we acknowledge that.
and the death of loved ones,
和我们爱的人的死亡
a friend, a colleague, a neighbor
一位正在悲痛中的
who has lost someone suddenly,
突然失去别人的人
我们解决不了这件事
to fill that awkward silence,
来填补那种尴尬的沉默
for hospital parking anymore."
the lasagna, the curry or the casserole,
千层面、咖喱或是炖菜的人
will be greatly appreciated.
my friend's ashes around her garden
朋友的骨灰洒在花园里
and toasted coffins with a shot of ouzo.
并用一杯茴香酒敬过棺材
out of my comfort zone
would have wanted.
so I have the will,
所以我有遗嘱
and I have my investment property.
还有我那块地产投资
music to remember me by.
记念我的音乐
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Michelle Knox - Project and change professionalWestpac's Michelle Knox has led large-scale transformation programs in the UK, Ireland and Australia.
Why you should listen
Michelle Knox currently works in Finance Transformation for Westpac Banking Corporation, Sydney, Australia, leading a team to deliver superior products, services and sustainable change. In a world of constant change and disruption, Knox is passionate about helping others to adapt and thrive by identifying and supporting the unique skills and talents of individuals to create a positive work environment.
Knox is also an avid work traveler and storyteller, often combining these passions to write witty accounts of her adventures in a travel blog.
In 2017, Knox's father passed away from a progressive illness. Through this experience, Knox learned that talking about death and planning for it enabled her father to experience a good death and her family to have a healthy bereavement, something she realized not everyone achieves.
After discussing death with friends, colleagues and complete strangers, Knox realized there was a need to address the way we deal with the most significant change we will all experience: death. With humor and compassion, Knox shares her own experiences and learnings in order to help others. She is living proof that talking about death won’t kill you.
Michelle Knox | Speaker | TED.com