ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Alyssa Monks - Painter
Alyssa Monks transfers the intimacy and vulnerability of human experience onto a painted surface.

Why you should listen

Alyssa Monks blurs the line between abstraction and realism through layering different spaces and moments in her paintings. Using semi-transparent filters of glass, vinyl, steam and water to flip background and foreground in her 10-year water series, she seduced the viewer into shallow spaces. Today, she is imposing a transparent landscape of infinite space over her emotionally evocative subjects.

The tension in her mostly large-scale paintings is sustained not only by the composition but also by the surface treatment itself. Each brushstroke is thickly applied oil paint, like a fossil recording every gesture and decision, expressing the energetic and empathic experience of the handmade object.

Monks's work is represented by Forum Gallery in New York City. She lives and paints in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. Her latest solo exhibition "Resolution" took place March and April of 2016 at Forum Gallery. Monks's paintings have been the subject of numerous solo and group exhibitions including "Intimacy" at the Kunst Museum in Ahlen, Germany and "Reconfiguring the Body in American Art, 1820–2009" at the National Academy Museum of Fine Arts, New York. Her work is represented in public and private collections, including the Savannah College of Arts, the Somerset Art Association, Fullerton College, the Seavest Collection and the collections of Eric Fischl, Howard Tullman, Gerrity Lansing, Danielle Steele, Alec Baldwin and Luciano Benetton.

Born 1977 in New Jersey, Monks began oil painting as a child. She studied at The New School in New York and Montclair State University and earned her B.A. from Boston College in 1999. During this time she studied painting at Lorenzo de’ Medici in Florence. She went on to earn her M.F.A from the New York Academy of Art, Graduate School of Figurative Art in 2001. She completed an artist in residency at Fullerton College in 2006 and has lectured and taught at universities and institutions nationwide. She continues to offer workshops and lectures regularly.

Monks has been awarded the Elizabeth Greenshields Foundation Grant for Painting three times and serves as a member of the New York Academy of Art's Board of Trustees.

More profile about the speaker
Alyssa Monks | Speaker | TED.com
TEDxIndianaUniversity

Alyssa Monks: How loss helped one artist find beauty in imperfection

愛麗莎.蒙克思: 「失去」如何幫助一名藝術家尋找不完美中的美

Filmed:
1,356,264 views

畫家愛麗莎.蒙克思(Alyssa Monks)在未知、不可測甚至是痛苦中,尋找到美麗和靈感。在這場充滿詩意親密的演講中,她描述了在她成為一名藝術家以及人性的發展過程中,她如何用繪畫及畫布與生活做互動。
- Painter
Alyssa Monks transfers the intimacy and vulnerability of human experience onto a painted surface. Full bio

Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.

00:12
I'm a painter畫家.
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我是一名畫家,
00:14
I make large-scale大規模 figurative比喻 paintings繪畫,
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我專攻大型的形象繪畫,
00:16
which哪一個 means手段 I paint塗料 people
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也就是說,我畫人物,
00:18
like this.
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像這樣的。
00:20
But I'm here tonight今晚 to tell you
about something personal個人
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但今晚我來這裏,是想和大家分享
00:23
that changed my work and my perspective透視.
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一些改變我作品和想法的私事。
00:27
It's something we all go through通過,
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一些我們都會經歷的事,
00:29
and my hope希望 is that my experience經驗
may可能 be helpful有幫助 to somebody.
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而我希望我的經歷
能幫助到一些人。
00:34
To give you some background背景 on me,
I grew成長 up the youngest最年輕的 of eight.
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為了讓各位更了解我,我先從背景說起,
我是家裏八個孩子中最小的。
00:38
Yes, eight kids孩子 in my family家庭.
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是的,我們家中有八個孩子。
00:40
I have six older舊的 brothers兄弟 and a sister妹妹.
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我有六個哥哥和一個姐姐。
00:42
To give you a sense of what that's like,
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為了讓各位有更直觀的感覺,
00:45
when my family家庭 went on vacation假期,
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我們全家出去旅遊,
00:47
we had a bus總線.
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開的是巴士。
00:49
(Laughter笑聲)
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(笑聲)
00:52
My supermom超級媽媽 would drive駕駛 us all over town
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我的超人媽媽會開車
載我們到城中各處,
00:55
to our various各個 after-school放學後 activities活動 --
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去參加各式的課後活動——
00:58
not in the bus總線.
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不是用巴士。
01:00
We had a regular定期 car汽車, too.
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我們家也是有普通車的。
01:03
She would take me to art藝術 classes,
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她送我去上美術課,
01:05
and not just one or two.
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不僅一、兩種。
01:07
She took me to every一切 available可得到 art藝術 class
from when I was eight to 16,
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在我八歲到十六歲之間,
她帶我參加所有我能參加的美術課,
01:12
because that's all I wanted to do.
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因為我真的很喜歡美術。
01:14
She even took a class with me
in New York紐約 City.
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她甚至在紐約城和我一起上課。
01:18
Now, being存在 the youngest最年輕的 of eight,
I learned學到了 a few少數 survival生存 skills技能.
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身為家中最小的孩子,
我學會了一些生存技能。
01:21
Rule規則 number one:
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規則一:
01:23
don't let your big brother哥哥
see you do anything stupid.
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永遠別讓你哥看到你在做傻事。
01:27
So I learned學到了 to be quiet安靜 and neat整齊
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所以我學會了安靜與整潔、
01:30
and careful小心 to follow跟隨 the rules規則
and stay in line.
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循規蹈矩並小心行事。
01:33
But painting繪畫 was where I made製作 the rules規則.
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但談到繪畫,就是我說了算。
01:36
That was my private私人的 world世界.
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那是我的私人世界。
01:39
By 14, I knew知道 I really wanted
to be an artist藝術家.
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我十四歲大的時候,
就決心做一名畫家。
01:43
My big plan計劃 was to be a waitress小姐
to support支持 my painting繪畫.
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我的偉大計劃是,去當一名
女服務生來支持我的繪畫開支。
01:48
So I continued繼續 honing珩磨 my skills技能.
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我持續磨練我的技能。
01:50
I went to graduate畢業 school學校
and I got an MFAMFA,
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我去念研究院,
並獲得了碩士學位,
01:52
and at my first solo獨奏 show顯示,
my brother哥哥 asked me,
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在我第一次的個人繪畫展中,
我的哥哥問我,
01:55
"What do all these red dots
mean next下一個 to the paintings繪畫?"
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「那些有紅點在旁邊的畫
是什麽意思?」
01:58
Nobody沒有人 was more surprised詫異 than me.
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當時沒有人比我更驚訝了。
02:01
The red dots meant意味著
that the paintings繪畫 were sold出售
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那些紅點代表我的畫已經賣掉了,
02:04
and that I'd be able能夠 to pay工資 my rent出租
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也就是說,我有能力
用繪畫來支付我的房租了。
02:06
with painting繪畫.
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02:08
Now, my apartment公寓
had four electrical電動 outlets網點,
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所以我住的的公寓有四個插座了,
02:11
and I couldn't不能 use a microwave微波
and a toaster烤麵包機 at the same相同 time,
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但還是沒有辦法同時使用
微波爐和烤麵包機,
02:14
but still, I could pay工資 my rent出租.
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但,至少我可以支付我的租金了。
02:17
So I was very happy快樂.
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所以我很開心。
02:20
Here's這裡的 a painting繪畫
from back around that time.
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這是一幅我當時的繪畫作品。
02:23
I needed需要 it to be
as realistic實際 as possible可能.
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我希望畫作的呈現,越真實越好,
02:25
It had to be specific具體 and believable可信的.
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它必須具體且令人信服。
02:29
This was the place地點 where I was
isolated孤立 and in total control控制.
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它是一個讓我感到清淨、
完全有主導權的地方。
02:35
Since以來 then, I've made製作 a career事業
of painting繪畫 people in water.
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之後,我專攻繪畫水中的人物像。
02:39
Bathtubs浴缸 and showers陣雨 were
the perfect完善 enclosed封閉 environment環境.
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浴缸和淋浴間是
與外隔絕的完美空間。
02:43
It was intimate親密 and private私人的,
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令人感到親密且隱私的,
02:45
and water was this complicated複雜 challenge挑戰
that kept不停 me busy for a decade.
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而「水」這個覆雜的挑戰
也讓我忙了將近十年。
02:49
I made製作 about 200 of these paintings繪畫,
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我大約創作了200幅這樣的作品,
02:52
some of them six to eight feet,
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其中一些有6到8英寸大,
02:54
like this one.
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就跟這幅差不多。
02:56
For this painting繪畫, I mixed flour麵粉 in
with the bathwater洗澡水 to make it cloudy多雲的
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為了要畫這幅畫,我把麵粉撒進水裡,
讓水看起來有煙霧瀰漫的感覺,
03:00
and I floated浮動 cooking烹飪 oil on the surface表面
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然後我在上面塗了一層烹飪油,
03:03
and stuck卡住 a girl女孩 in it,
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然後請一位女孩進去,
03:05
and when I lit發光的 it up,
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當我打光上去,
03:06
it was so beautiful美麗
I couldn't不能 wait to paint塗料 it.
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那畫面真的太美了,
我等不及想馬上畫了。
03:10
I was driven驅動 by this
kind of impulsive浮躁 curiosity好奇心,
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我被這種沖動的好奇心所驅使,
03:14
always looking for something new to add:
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一直在尋找創作畫作的新元素:
03:16
vinyl乙烯基, steam蒸汽, glass玻璃.
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黑膠唱片、水蒸氣、玻璃。
03:19
I once一旦 put all this Vaseline礦脂
in my head and hair頭髮
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有一次我把凡士林往我頭上倒,
03:22
just to see what that would look like.
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想看看頭髮呈現的效果。
03:25
Don't do that.
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千萬別那麽做...
03:26
(Laughter笑聲)
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(笑聲)
03:30
So it was going well.
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一切都相當順利。
03:31
I was finding發現 my way.
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我找到了自己的出路,
03:33
I was eager急於 and motivated動機
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我是如此渴望、如此充滿動力,
03:35
and surrounded包圍 by artists藝術家,
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身邊圍繞著藝術家,
03:37
always going to openings開口 and events事件.
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也常常參加各種開幕式和活動。
03:40
I was having some success成功 and recognition承認
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我獲得了成功和
別人對我的認同,
03:43
and I moved移動 into an apartment公寓
with more than four outlets網點.
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所以我搬到一個有超過
四個插座的公寓裏去。
03:48
My mom媽媽 and I would stay up very late晚了
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我母親和我會熬夜談論
03:50
talking about our latest最新 ideas思路
and inspiring鼓舞人心 each other.
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最新的想法,並互相鼓勵。
03:53
She made製作 beautiful美麗 pottery陶器.
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她做的陶器很美。
03:56
I have a friend朋友 named命名 Bo
who made製作 this painting繪畫
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我有一個叫博的朋友,
他畫了一幅我和他太太
在海邊跳舞的畫。
03:59
of his wife妻子 and I dancing跳舞 by the ocean海洋,
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04:01
and he called it "The Light Years年份."
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他給這幅畫取名叫《光年》。
04:03
I asked him what that meant意味著, and he said,
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我問他那是什麽意思,
他回答說:
04:06
"Well, that's when you've stepped加強
into adulthood成年, you're no longer a child兒童,
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「在你步入成年,不再是一個孩子,
04:10
but you're not yet然而 weighed稱重 down
by the responsibilities責任 of life."
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但你卻還沒有準備好
扛起生命責任的那段時光。」
04:15
That was it. It was the light years年份.
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那就是《光年》。
04:18
On October十月 8, 2011,
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2011年10月8日,
04:20
the light years年份 came來了 to an end結束.
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我的《光年》結束了。
04:22
My mom媽媽 was diagnosed確診 with lung cancer癌症.
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我媽被診斷出了肺癌。
04:27
It had spread傳播 to her bones骨頭,
and it was in her brain.
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癌細胞已經擴散到
她的骨頭和大腦。
04:30
When she told me this, I fell下跌 to my knees膝蓋.
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當她告訴我這件事時,
我跪倒了。
04:32
I totally完全 lost丟失 it.
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我完全不知所措。
04:35
And when I got myself together一起
and I looked看著 at her,
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當我整理好情緒,我注視著她,
04:38
I realized實現, this isn't about me.
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我意識到我自己不是重點,
04:39
This is about figuring盤算 out
how to help her.
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如何幫助她才是重點。
04:43
My father父親 is a doctor醫生,
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我的父親是一名醫生,
04:44
and so we had a great advantage優點
having him in charge收費,
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所以讓他負責治療有很多好處,
04:48
and he did a beautiful美麗 job工作
taking服用 care關心 of her.
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他在照顧我媽這方面,做得很好。
04:50
But I, too, wanted to do
everything I could to help,
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但是,我也想盡一切努力幫助她,
04:53
so I wanted to try everything.
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所以我想嘗試各種可能。
04:56
We all did.
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我們甚麼都做。
04:57
I researched研究 alternative替代 medicines藥品,
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我研究了其它備選的藥物、
04:59
diets飲食, juicing榨汁, acupuncture針刺.
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飲食、果汁、針灸。
05:03
Finally最後, I asked her,
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有一天,我問她,
05:05
"Is this what you want me to do?"
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「這是你想讓我為你做的嗎?」
05:07
And she said, "No."
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她說:「不。」
05:09
She said, "Pace步伐 yourself你自己.
I'm going to need you later後來."
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她說:「做你該做的,
我之後會需要你的。」
05:16
She knew知道 what was happening事件,
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她知道正在發生的這一切,
05:17
and she knew知道 what the doctors醫生
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她還知道了醫生、
05:19
and the experts專家
and the internet互聯網 didn't know:
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專家和網絡不知道的事:
05:21
how she wanted to go through通過 this.
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她自己想要如何地
經歷這一切。
05:24
I just needed需要 to ask her.
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我只要問她就知道答案。
05:27
I realized實現 that if I tried試著 to fix固定 it,
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但我知道,如果我嘗試著續續問下去,
05:29
I would miss小姐 it.
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我就會失去她。
05:32
So I just started開始 to be with her,
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所以我決定,只要守護在她身邊,
05:34
whatever隨你 that meant意味著
and whatever隨你 situation情況 came來了 up,
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不管情況變得怎樣,
05:37
just really listen to her.
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我只要傾聽她的想法就好。
05:40
If before I was resisting抵制,
then now I was surrendering投降,
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以前我會抗拒,但現在我看開了,
05:45
giving up trying to control控制
the uncontrollable不可控
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我已經放棄嘗試去控制
那些不可控的東西,
05:47
and just being存在 there in it with her.
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只想好好地陪伴她。
05:51
Time slowed放緩 down,
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時間慢了下來,
05:53
and the date日期 was irrelevant不相干.
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日期也不重要了。
05:57
We developed發達 a routine常規.
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我們建立了一個固定的生活方式。
05:59
Early each morning早上 I would crawl爬行
into bed with her and sleep睡覺 with her.
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每天早上我都會躲進
她的被窩裡和她睡在一起。
06:03
My brother哥哥 would come for breakfast早餐
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我哥哥會過來一起吃早餐,
06:04
and we'd星期三 be so glad高興 to hear
his car汽車 coming未來 up the driveway車道.
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每當我們聽見他的車開入車道時,
我們都會很開心。
06:07
So I'd help her up and take both her hands
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我會握住她的雙手,幫忙扶她起來,
06:11
and help her walk步行 to the kitchen廚房.
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帶她走到廚房。
06:13
She had this huge巨大 mug she made製作
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她有一個這麼大的、
自己做的大馬克杯,
06:17
she loved喜愛 to drink her coffee咖啡 out of,
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她喜歡把一大杯咖啡都喝光,
06:19
and she loved喜愛 Irish愛爾蘭的 soda蘇打 bread麵包
for breakfast早餐.
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她也喜歡早餐的愛爾蘭蘇打麵包。
06:23
Afterwards之後 was the shower淋浴,
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之後會去洗澡,
06:25
and she loved喜愛 this part部分.
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她很喜歡洗澡。
06:26
She loved喜愛 the warm water,
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她很愛溫暖的水,
06:27
so I made製作 this as indulgent放縱的 as I could,
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我會盡量幫她放鬆,
06:31
like a spa溫泉.
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像做 spa 一樣。
06:33
My sister妹妹 would help sometimes有時.
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我的姐姐有時會來幫忙。
06:35
We had warm towels毛巾
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當她洗好,我們會趕緊準備好
06:37
and slippers拖鞋 ready準備 immediately立即
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溫暖的毛巾和拖鞋,
這樣她就不會著涼。
06:39
so she never got cold for a second第二.
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06:42
I'd blow-dry吹乾 her hair頭髮.
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然後我會吹乾她的頭髮。
06:45
My brothers兄弟 would come in the evenings晚上
and bring帶來 their kids孩子,
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到了晚上,哥哥們
會帶著他們的孩子過來,
06:48
and that was the highlight突出 of her day.
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那是她一天當中最精彩的部分。
06:51
Over time, we started開始 to use a wheelchair輪椅,
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一段時間後,我們開始使用輪椅,
06:54
and she didn't want to eat so much,
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她不再吃那麽多,
06:55
and she used the tiniest最小的 little teacup茶碗
we could find to drink her coffee咖啡.
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她使用我們找來的
最小茶杯來喝咖啡。
07:03
I couldn't不能 support支持 her myself anymore,
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我一個人已經顧不來,
07:05
so we hired僱用 an aide助手
to help me with the showers陣雨.
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所以我們雇了一個助手來幫她洗澡。
07:08
These simple簡單 daily日常 activities活動
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這些簡單的日常活動,
07:11
became成為 our sacred神聖 ritual儀式,
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變成我們神聖的例行公事,
07:13
and we repeated重複 them day after day
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隨著癌症的擴散,
07:15
as the cancer癌症 grew成長.
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我們日覆一日的重覆。
07:17
It was humbling震撼人心 and painful痛苦
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我們很恭敬也很痛苦,
07:19
and exactly究竟 where I wanted to be.
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但這是我想要的。
07:24
We called this time "the beautiful美麗 awful可怕."
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我們把這段時間稱為
《美麗的痛苦時光》。
07:28
She died死亡 on October十月 26, 2012.
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她在2012年10月26日過世。
07:32
It was a year and three weeks
after her diagnosis診斷.
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離她診斷出癌症
一年又三個禮拜後,
07:36
She was gone走了.
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她離開了人間。
07:41
My brothers兄弟, sister妹妹, and father父親 and I
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我的哥哥們、姐姐、父親還有我,
07:43
all came來了 together一起 in this
supportive支持 and attentive細心 way.
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大家以這種支持和
關愛的方式一起度過。
07:47
It was as though雖然 our whole整個 family家庭 dynamic動態
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雖然這是我們整個家庭的巨變,
07:49
and all our established既定 roles角色 vanished消失
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我們的付出都付之一炬,
07:51
and we were just
all together一起 in this unknown未知,
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但我們仍一起面對未知的世界,
07:54
feeling感覺 the same相同 thing
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感同身受,照顧彼此。
07:56
and taking服用 care關心 of each other.
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07:59
I'm so grateful感激 for them.
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我真心感激他們。
08:05
As someone有人 who spends most
of my time alone單獨 in a studio工作室 working加工,
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身為一個把大部分時間
都待在畫室的我,
08:08
I had no idea理念 that this kind of connection連接
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對這種聯繫感...
這麼重要、這麼有療癒的聯繫感
卻一無所知。
08:11
could be so important重要, so healing復原.
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08:14
This was the most important重要 thing.
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這是相當重要的事情。
08:18
It was what I always wanted.
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這就是我一直在追尋的。
08:21
So after the funeral葬禮, it was time
for me to go back to my studio工作室.
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葬禮之後,是時候該回到我的畫室了。
08:27
So I packed打包 up my car汽車
and I drove開車 back to Brooklyn布魯克林,
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我收拾好行李,開車回布魯克林,
08:30
and painting繪畫 is what I've always doneDONE,
so that's what I did.
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繪畫一直是我的最愛,
我只會做這件事。
08:34
And here's這裡的 what happened發生.
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後來發生了一件事:
08:39
It's like a release發布 of everything
that was unraveling解開 in me.
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我感受到心裡對每樣東西的釋懷。
08:45
That safe安全, very, very carefully小心
rendered呈現 safe安全 place地點
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那種安全感,那個我在其它畫作中
精心創造出的安全之地,
08:50
that I created創建 in all my other paintings繪畫,
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08:53
it was a myth神話.
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只是個神話,
08:55
It didn't work.
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它不再起作用了。
08:57
And I was afraid害怕, because
I didn't want to paint塗料 anymore.
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我很害怕,因為我不想再畫下去了。
09:03
So I went into the woods樹木.
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我跑到樹林裏。
09:04
I thought, I'll try that, going outside.
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我在想,我得試試,去外面走走。
09:08
I got my paints油漆,
and I wasn't a landscape景觀 painter畫家,
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我帶上畫具,我並非風景畫家,
09:12
but I wasn't really
much of any kind of painter畫家 at all,
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但當時我什麽畫家也不是,
沒有歸屬感、沒有期望,
09:14
so I had no attachment附件, no expectation期望,
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09:17
which哪一個 allowed允許 me to be reckless魯莽 and free自由.
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這讓我可以完全自由
不計後果地創作。
09:20
I actually其實 left one of these wet paintings繪畫
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我留了一副未乾的畫
09:22
outside overnight過夜
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在外面過夜,
09:25
next下一個 to a light in the woods樹木.
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把它放在樹林中的
一盞路燈旁。
09:28
By the morning早上 it was lacquered上漆 with bugs蟲子.
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隔天早上,蟲子都被黏在漆裏了。
09:32
But I didn't care關心.
It didn't matter. It didn't matter.
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但我並不在意,這一點都不重要,
一點都不重要。
09:35
I took all these paintings繪畫
back to my studio工作室,
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我把這些畫全都帶回我的畫室,
09:37
and scraped them, and carved into them,
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我把它們刮花,
然後把塗料稀釋劑倒在畫上,
09:40
and poured paint塗料 thinner更薄 on them,
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09:42
put more paint塗料 on top最佳, drew德魯 on them.
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倒更多的染料在上面,
在頂層作畫。
09:45
I had no plan計劃,
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我毫無計劃,
09:47
but I was watching觀看 what was happening事件.
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但我在觀察正在發生的一切。
09:50
This is the one with all the bugs蟲子 in it.
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這就是當時那幅有
好多小蟲在裏面的畫。
09:53
I wasn't trying to represent代表 a real真實 space空間.
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我沒有嘗試要創作真實的空間。
09:56
It was the chaos混沌 and the imperfections缺陷
that were fascinating迷人 me,
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是其中的混亂和不完美讓我著迷,
10:00
and something started開始 to happen發生.
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隨後一些事情發生了,
10:03
I got curious好奇 again.
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我的好奇心回來了。
10:06
This is another另一個 one from the woods樹木.
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這是在樹林裏的另一幅畫。
10:10
There was a caveat警告 now, though雖然.
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不過現在多了一份解釋。
10:12
I couldn't不能 be controlling控制
the paint塗料 like I used to.
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我無法像以前一樣
去控制我所畫的。
10:15
It had to be about implying這意味著
and suggesting提示,
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它需要暗示、啟發,
10:18
not explaining說明 or describing說明.
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而非解釋、描述。
10:21
And that imperfect不完善,
chaotic混亂的, turbulent洶湧 surface表面
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而那不完美、混沌、混亂的表面
10:26
is what told the story故事.
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向我們講述了故事的經過。
10:30
I started開始 to be as curious好奇
as I was when I was a student學生.
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我開始變得好奇,
就像我學生時代那樣。
10:34
So the next下一個 thing was I wanted
to put figures人物 in these paintings繪畫, people,
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所以,我開始想把人物
放進到這些繪畫當中,
10:38
and I loved喜愛 this new environment環境,
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我喜歡這個新的環境,
10:39
so I wanted to have
both people and this atmosphere大氣層.
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我希望人物和這氛圍
能融為一體。
10:45
When the idea理念 hit擊中 me of how to do this,
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當我知道如何做的時候,
10:47
I got kind of nauseous噁心 and dizzy頭暈,
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我卻感到了噁心和眩暈,
10:50
which哪一個 is really just adrenaline腎上腺素, probably大概,
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可能只是因為腎上腺素的原因,
10:53
but for me it's a really good sign標誌.
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但這對我來說,這是一個好的徵兆。
10:56
And so now I want to show顯示 you
what I've been working加工 on.
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所以我想向各位展示
我最近的作品。
10:59
It's something I haven't沒有 shown顯示 yet然而,
and it's like a preview預習, I guess猜測,
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這是一些我還沒
來得及展示的畫作,
11:03
of my upcoming即將到來 show顯示,
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我想,就把它當作
11:05
what I have so far.
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我即將展示目前所有畫作的
畫展預告吧。
11:08
Expansive膨脹 space空間
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我用開闊的空間,
11:11
instead代替 of the isolated孤立 bathtub浴缸.
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替代掉孤立的浴缸。
11:13
I'm going outside instead代替 of inside.
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我要走出去,而非在裡面。
11:17
Loosening control控制,
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解開控制權,
11:19
savoring品嚐 the imperfections缺陷,
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品味不完整,
11:21
allowing允許 the --
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接受那——
11:24
allowing允許 the imperfections缺陷.
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接受那些不完整。
11:27
And in that imperfection缺陷,
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在那些不完整中,
11:29
you can find a vulnerability漏洞.
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你能找尋到脆弱。
11:31
I could feel my deepest最深 intention意向,
what matters事項 most to me,
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我能感受到我內心深處
對我最重要的意圖,
11:38
that human人的 connection連接
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我能感受到人與人之間的連結、
11:40
that can happen發生 in a space空間
where there's no resisting抵制 or controlling控制.
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我能感受到無拘無束的空間。
11:45
I want to make paintings繪畫 about that.
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我想要對此作畫。
11:50
So here's這裡的 what I learned學到了.
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而我學到的就是:
11:53
We're all going to have
big losses損失 in our lives生活,
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在人生旅途中,
我們都會經歷到一些重創,
11:57
maybe a job工作 or a career事業,
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也許是工作、事業、
11:59
relationships關係, love, our youth青年.
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關係、愛情、青春。
12:03
We're going to lose失去 our health健康,
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我們會失去健康,
12:05
people we love.
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失去我們摯愛的人。
12:08
These kinds of losses損失
are out of our control控制.
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這些失去都不是
我們能控制的。
12:10
They're unpredictable不可預料的,
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它們是無法預測的,
12:12
and they bring帶來 us to our knees膝蓋.
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它們使我們不得不向命運低頭,
12:15
And so I say, let them.
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所以我說,隨它去吧。
12:18
Fall秋季 to your knees膝蓋. Be humbled自愧不如.
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讓我們低頭跪下,變得謙遜。
12:22
Let go of trying to change更改 it
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讓嘗試改變
12:25
or even wanting希望 it to be different不同.
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或是希望改變的心態,隨它去吧,
12:27
It just is.
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它就是那樣。
12:31
And then there's space空間,
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之後會有一種空間,
12:32
and in that space空間 feel your vulnerability漏洞,
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你會在那空間中感受到你的脆弱、
12:35
what matters事項 most to you,
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思考對你最重要的事、
12:37
your deepest最深 intention意向.
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探索你心中的意圖。
12:40
And be curious好奇 to connect
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抱著好奇的心態,
12:43
to what and who is really here,
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與你當下醒著、
活著的人事物做連結。
12:47
awake甦醒 and alive.
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12:50
It's what we all want.
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這就是我們所想要的。
12:52
Let's take the opportunity機會
to find something beautiful美麗
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讓我們把握機會去尋找那些
12:56
in the unknown未知, in the unpredictable不可預料的,
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未知、無法預測、甚至是
痛苦中的美麗事物吧!
13:00
and even in the awful可怕.
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13:03
Thank you.
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謝謝。
13:04
(Applause掌聲)
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(掌聲)
Translated by Yi-Fan Yu
Reviewed by Yi Wu

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ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Alyssa Monks - Painter
Alyssa Monks transfers the intimacy and vulnerability of human experience onto a painted surface.

Why you should listen

Alyssa Monks blurs the line between abstraction and realism through layering different spaces and moments in her paintings. Using semi-transparent filters of glass, vinyl, steam and water to flip background and foreground in her 10-year water series, she seduced the viewer into shallow spaces. Today, she is imposing a transparent landscape of infinite space over her emotionally evocative subjects.

The tension in her mostly large-scale paintings is sustained not only by the composition but also by the surface treatment itself. Each brushstroke is thickly applied oil paint, like a fossil recording every gesture and decision, expressing the energetic and empathic experience of the handmade object.

Monks's work is represented by Forum Gallery in New York City. She lives and paints in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. Her latest solo exhibition "Resolution" took place March and April of 2016 at Forum Gallery. Monks's paintings have been the subject of numerous solo and group exhibitions including "Intimacy" at the Kunst Museum in Ahlen, Germany and "Reconfiguring the Body in American Art, 1820–2009" at the National Academy Museum of Fine Arts, New York. Her work is represented in public and private collections, including the Savannah College of Arts, the Somerset Art Association, Fullerton College, the Seavest Collection and the collections of Eric Fischl, Howard Tullman, Gerrity Lansing, Danielle Steele, Alec Baldwin and Luciano Benetton.

Born 1977 in New Jersey, Monks began oil painting as a child. She studied at The New School in New York and Montclair State University and earned her B.A. from Boston College in 1999. During this time she studied painting at Lorenzo de’ Medici in Florence. She went on to earn her M.F.A from the New York Academy of Art, Graduate School of Figurative Art in 2001. She completed an artist in residency at Fullerton College in 2006 and has lectured and taught at universities and institutions nationwide. She continues to offer workshops and lectures regularly.

Monks has been awarded the Elizabeth Greenshields Foundation Grant for Painting three times and serves as a member of the New York Academy of Art's Board of Trustees.

More profile about the speaker
Alyssa Monks | Speaker | TED.com