Susan David: The gift and power of emotional courage
Suzan Dejvid (Susan David): Dar i snaga emocionalne hrabrosti
Susan David, a Harvard Medical School psychologist, studies emotional agility: the psychology of how we can use emotion to bring forward our best selves in all aspects of how we love, live, parent and lead. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
intention behind the word
literally translated means,
kada se doslovno prevede znači:
I bring you into being."
postaješ stvaran."
being greeted like that.
da vas tako pozdravljaju.
in the way we see ourselves?
da sebe vidimo na taj način?
and fraught world?
at the center of my life's work.
mog životnog rada.
with our inner world drives everything.
sa unutrašnjim svetom, pokreće sve.
of emotions as good or bad,
osećanja kao dobrih ili loših,
of complexity is toxic.
sa složenošću je pogubna.
of emotional agility
emotivne agilnosti
of a university,
dvoranama univerziteta,
of apartheid South Africa,
južnoafričkog aparthejda,
committed to not seeing.
of racist legislation possible
rasističkog zakonodavstva moguće,
that they are doing nothing wrong.
da ne rade bilo šta loše.
of the destructive power of denial
za destruktivnu moć poricanja
to the country of my birth.
šta ono uzrokuje mojoj rodnoj zemlji.
and say goodbye to my father
i pozdravim se sa ocem
and walked the passage that ran through
i prošetala prolazom koji je vodio
my father lay dying of cancer.
gde je moj otac ležao umirući od raka.
but he knew I was there.
ali znao je da sam tu.
uvek sam osećala zapaženom.
dnevnim obavezama.
to mathematics to history to biology,
do matematike, do istorije do biologije,
I would shrug and say, "OK."
slegnula bih i rekla: "Dobro."
to keep his small business going
da održava svoju malu firmu
was grieving the love of her life
oplakivala je ljubav svog života,
and emotionally ravaged.
finansijski i emotivno opustošeni.
isolated, fast.
da se izolujem brzo.
the full weight of my grief.
punu težinu moje patnje.
that values relentless positivity,
koja ceni neumornu pozitivnost,
my story of triumph over grief.
moja priča o trijumfu nad boli.
fiksirala je prodorne plave oči na mene
fixed me with burning blue eyes
authentically to my grief and pain.
autentično svojoj tuzi i bolu.
that started in this blank notebook
koja je počela praznom sveskom
correspondence with myself.
the rigidity of denial
mimo krutosti poricanja
from its fragility.
od njegove krhkosti.
that we are unseen.
da smo neprimetni.
where that child once was,
gde je nekad bilo dete,
brings us to our knees.
baci na kolena.
this frailty successfully or sustainably.
uspešno, niti održivo.
tells us that depression
nam saopštava
of disability globally --
vodeći uzrok invalidnosti u svetu -
political and economic change,
i ekonomskih promena bez premca,
into rigid responses to their emotions.
u krute reakcije na svoja osećanja.
obsessively brood on our feelings.
da oplakujemo svoja osećanja.
da začepimo naša osećanja,
bottle our emotions,
deemed legitimate.
koja smatramo legitimnim.
with over 70,000 people,
sa preko 70.000 ljudi,
so-called "bad emotions,"
što imamo takozvana "loša osećanja",
these feelings.
da potisnemo ta osećanja.
like our children --
poput naše dece -
out of emotions seen as negative,
zbog emocija koje vidimo kao negativne,
as inherently valuable.
are now seen as good or bad.
se trenutno posmatraju kao dobra ili loša.
a new form of moral correctness.
novi oblik moralne ispravnosti.
to just stay positive.
da prosto ostanu pozitivni.
or false positivity, it's this:
ili lažnu pozitivnost, onda je to:
koju možemo da naučimo
lesson we can learn
ledene pokrivače kako se tope,
osećanja pokazuje
are pushed aside or ignored,
ili ignorišemo osećanja,
in the refrigerator --
of unwanted emotions when you ignore them,
osećanjima kada ih ignorišete,
to embrace false positivity,
kako bismo prigrlili lažnu pozitivnost,
to deal with the world as it is,
da se nosimo sa svetom kakav jeste,
what they don't want to feel.
kako ne žele da se osećaju.
I don't want to feel disappointed."
jer ne želim da se razočaram."
by their feelings.
ili uznemirujuća osećanja.
that comes with failure.
koje ide uz neuspeh.
of our contract with life.
našeg ugovora sa životom.
to a meaningful life.
smislenom životu.
da demontiramo rigidnost
nad te prazne stranice,
to what I did feel.
da otvaram srce onome što sam osećala.
of all of our emotions --
svih naših emocija -
to resilience, thriving,
that just an acceptance of emotions.
od pukog prihvatanja emocija.
I found that words are essential.
sam otkrila da su reči suštinski bitne.
to describe our feelings.
da opišemo naša osećanja.
common one I hear.
što najčešće čujem.
between stress and disappointment
između stresa i razočaranja
of "I'm in the wrong career."
saznanja "u pogrešnoj sam struci".
the precise cause of our feelings.
tačni uzrok našim osećanjima.
the readiness potential in our brain
potencijalom za pripravnost
to take concrete steps.
omogućuje da preduzmemo konkretne korake.
the right steps for us.
prave korake za nas.
to things that we care about.
koje osvetljavaju ono za šta marimo.
anything in our worlds.
bilo kakvu vrednost u našem svetu.
that you value equity and fairness --
da vrednujete jednakost i poštenje -
to the difficult emotions,
za komplikovane emocije,
that are values-aligned.
koje su u skladu s našim vrednostima.
they are not directives.
po našim emocijama zbog njihove vrednosti
our emotions for their values
in his frustration with his baby sister --
u njegovoj frustriranosti mlađom sestrom -
njegoj zamisli da može da je pokloni
that he gets to give her away
he sees in a shopping mall.
one ne poseduju nas.
between how I feel in all my wisdom
kako se osećamo u svoj svojoj mudrosti
koje su u skladu s našim vrednostima,
do najboljih verzija nas samih
to the journal of your hearts.
pristupite dnevniku vaših srca.
as in, "I'm angry" or "I'm sad."
kao kod "Ja sam ljuta" ili "Ja sam tužna".
as if you are the emotion.
and the emotion is a data source.
a emocija je izvor podataka.
the feeling for what it is:
suštinu osećanja:
da se pokažu u najboljem svetlu na poslu,
to bring the best of themselves to work,
to feel their emotional truth,
da osećaju svoje istinske emocije,
flourish in the organization.
cvetaju u toj organizaciji.
individuals, teams,
pojedinci, ekipe,
to the normal human emotions.
ka normalnim ljudskim emocijama.
towards my values?"
ka mojim vrednostima?"
to be with your emotions
da budete uz vaše emocije
to take values-connected steps.
korake koji su u vezi s vašim vrednostima.
terrified by the idea of death.
užasnuta zamisli o smrti.
with soft pats and kisses.
nežnim tapšanjem i poljupcima.
a buffer between me and reality.
amortizer između mene i stvarnosti.
through those nights.
kroz te noći.
is not an absence of fear;
nije odsustvo straha;
da za 10 kratkih godina
is all too precious
suviše dragoceno
correspondence with your own heart.
prepiske sa vašim srcem.
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Susan David - Psychologist, researcher, authorSusan David, a Harvard Medical School psychologist, studies emotional agility: the psychology of how we can use emotion to bring forward our best selves in all aspects of how we love, live, parent and lead.
Why you should listen
What does it take internally, in the way we deal with our thoughts, emotions and stories, for us to thrive in a complex and changing world? How we respond to these inner experiences drives our actions, careers, relationships, happiness, health -- everything that matters in our lives. Susan David became fascinated by this question through first-hand experience of loss and resilience, while growing up in a country in which hate was legislated: apartheid South Africa.
David holds a PhD in the psychology of emotions, is an award-winning Harvard Medical School psychologist, and is ranked as one of the world's leading management thinkers. Her #1 Wall Street Journal bestselling book, Emotional Agility, describes the psychological skills critical to thriving in times of complexity and change. David is CEO of Evidence Based Psychology, on Harvard Medical School faculty, and a co-founder of the Institute of Coaching. Described as "a powerful speaker, visionary thinker and inspirational personality," she is an unwavering believer in the power of people to bring the best of who they are to themselves, their children, their organizations and their communities.
Susan David | Speaker | TED.com