TED@NYC
Sally Kohn: Let’s try emotional correctness
Sally Kohn: Mari mencoba kebenaran emosi
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Menurut cendekiawan politik Sally Kohn, Saatnya bagi kelompok liberal dan konservatif untuk melampaui perbedaan politik mereka dan saling mendengarkan. Dalam presentasi yang optimis ini, Kohn membagikan apa yang dia perlajari sebagai pembicara lesbian progresif di Fox News. Dia berkata bahwa ini bukan tentang kebenaran politik, namun tentang kebenaran emosi.
Sally Kohn - Political pundit
Sally Kohn searches for common ground among political foes by focusing on the compassion and humanity in everyone. Full bio
Sally Kohn searches for common ground among political foes by focusing on the compassion and humanity in everyone. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:13
So when I do my job, people hate me.
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Saat saya bekerja, orang-orang membenci saya.
00:16
In fact, the better I do my job,
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Semakin bagus pekerjaan saya,
00:19
the more people hate me.
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orang-orang semakin membenci saya.
00:20
And no, I'm not a meter maid,
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Bukan. Saya bukan tukang tilang,
00:22
and I'm not an undertaker.
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juga bukan petugas pemakaman.
00:24
I am a progressive lesbian talking head
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Saya seorang pembicara tentang lesbian progresif
00:27
on Fox News. (Applause)
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di Fox News. (Tepuk tangan)
00:31
So y'all heard that, right? Just to make sure, right?
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Jadi Anda semua dengar kan? Untuk memastikan saja.
00:33
I am a gay talking head on Fox News.
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Saya adalah pembicara tentang gay di Fox News.
00:36
I am going to tell you how I do it
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Saya akan menceritakan bagaimana saya melakukannya
00:38
and the most important thing I've learned.
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dan hal terpenting yang saya pelajari.
00:40
So I go on television.
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Jadi saya berada di televisi
00:42
I debate people who literally want to obliterate
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dan mendebat orang-orang yang ingin melenyapkan
00:45
everything I believe in, in some cases,
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semua hal yang saya yakini, dan pada beberapa kasus.
00:47
who don't want me and people like me to even exist.
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orang-orang yang tidak ingin orang seperti saya ada di dunia.
00:50
It's sort of like Thanksgiving
with your conservative uncle
with your conservative uncle
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Ibarat merayakan Thanksgiving bersama paman Anda yang kolot
00:53
on steroids,
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dengan storoid,
00:55
with a live television audience of millions.
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dengan jutaan pemirsa televisi yang menyaksikan langsung.
00:59
It's totally almost just like that.
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Benar-benar hampir seperti ini.
01:01
And that's just on air.
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Itu hanya di televisi.
01:03
The hate mail I get is unbelievable.
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Surat kebencian yang saya terima luar biasa.
01:05
Last week alone, I got 238 pieces of nasty email
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Minggu lalu saja, saya menerima 238 email yang buruk
01:10
and more hate tweets than I can even count.
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dan lebih banyak lagi kicauan kebencian yang tidak dapat dihitung.
01:13
I was called an idiot, a traitor, a scourge,
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Saya disebut idiot, pengkhianat, biang kerok,
01:17
a cunt, and an ugly man,
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kemaluan, dan orang jelek,
01:19
and that was just in one email.
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dalam satu email yang sama.
01:21
(Laughter)
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(Tawa)
01:24
So what have I realized,
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Jadi apa yang saya sadari
01:26
being on the receiving end of all this ugliness?
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saat menerima semua ujung keburukan ini?
01:29
Well, my biggest takeaway is that for decades,
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Hal terbesar yang dapat saya ambil adalah selama beberapa dasawarsa,
01:32
we've been focused on political correctness,
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kita berfokus pada kebenaran politik,
01:35
but what matters more is emotional correctness.
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namun yang lebih penting adalah kebenaran emosi.
01:39
Let me give you a small example.
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Saya akan memberikan contoh kecil.
01:41
I don't care if you call me a dyke. I really don't.
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Saya tidak peduli disebut "dyke", benar.
01:44
I care about two things.
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Saya peduli akan dua hal.
01:45
One, I care that you spell it right.
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Pertama, saya peduli jika Anda mengejanya dengan benar.
01:48
(Laughter) (Applause)
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(Tawa) (Tepuk tangan)
01:53
Just quick refresher, it's D-Y-K-E.
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Sebagai penyegaran singkat, D.Y.K.E.
01:57
You'd totally be surprised.
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Anda akan terkejut.
02:00
And second, I don't care about the word,
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Kedua, saya tidak peduli tentang kata itu.
02:01
I care about how you use it.
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Saya peduli tentang bagaimana Anda menggunakannya
02:03
Are you being friendly? Are you just being naive?
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Apa Anda bersahabat? Naif?
02:05
Or do you really want to hurt me personally?
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Atau Anda ingin menyerang saya secara pribadi?
02:09
Emotional correctness is the tone, the feeling,
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Kebenaran emosi adalah nada, perasaan,
02:14
how we say what we say,
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bagaimana kita mengatakan apa yang kita katakan,
02:16
the respect and compassion we show one another.
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rasa hormat dan kasih sayang yang kita tunjukkan kepada orang lain.
02:19
And what I've realized is that political persuasion
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Dan yang saya sadari adalah rayuan politik
02:22
doesn't begin with ideas or facts or data.
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bukan dimulai dengan gagasan, fakta, atau data.
02:26
Political persuasion begins with
being emotionally correct.
being emotionally correct.
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Rayuan politik dimulai dengan kebenaran emosi.
02:30
So when I first went to go work at Fox News,
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Jadi saat pertama saya bekerja di Fox News,
02:33
true confession,
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pengakuan sebenarnya,
02:34
I expected there to be marks in the carpet
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saya mengharap ada bekas di karpet
02:37
from all the knuckle-dragging.
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dari cakaran kaki.
02:39
That, by the way, in case you're paying attention,
is not emotionally correct.
is not emotionally correct.
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Itu, jika Anda memperhatikan, tidak benar secara emosi.
02:44
But liberals on my side,
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Namun sisi liberal saya,
02:47
we can be self-righteous,
we can be condescending,
we can be condescending,
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kita bisa membenarkan diri sendiri, merendahkan,
02:50
we can be dismissive of anyone
who doesn't agree with us.
who doesn't agree with us.
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meremehkan orang lain yang tidak sependapat dengan kita.
02:53
In other words, we can be politically right
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Dengan kata lain, kita bisa benar secara politik
02:56
but emotionally wrong.
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namun salah secara emosi.
02:58
And incidentally, that means that
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Dan notabene, hal itu berarti
03:01
people don't like us. Right?
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orang-orang tidak menyukai kita, bukan?
03:04
Now here's the kicker.
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Lalu inilah masalahnya.
03:06
Conservatives are really nice.
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Orang kolot sangat ramah.
03:09
I mean, not all of them,
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Maksud saya, tidak semuanya
03:10
and not the ones who send me hate mail,
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dan bukan orang yang mengirimkan saya surat kebencian,
03:12
but you would be surprised.
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namun Anda akan terkejut.
03:14
Sean Hannity is one of the sweetest guys
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Sean Hannity adalah salah satu pria paling baik
03:16
I've ever met.
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yang pernah saya temui.
03:18
He spends his free time
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Dia menghabiskan waktu luangnya
03:20
trying to fix up his staff on blind dates,
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mencoba mencomblangi pegawainya dalam kencan buta,
03:22
and I know that if I ever had a problem,
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dan saya tahu bahwa jika saya mendapat masalah,
03:24
he would do anything he could to help.
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dia akan melakukan apapun untuk menolong.
03:27
Now, I think Sean Hannity is
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Kini, saya rasa bahwa Sean Hannity
03:30
99 percent politically wrong,
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99 persen salah secara politik
03:32
but his emotional correctness
is strikingly impressive,
is strikingly impressive,
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namun kebenaran emosinya sangat mengagumkan
03:36
and that's why people listen to him.
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karena itulah orang-orang mendengarnya.
03:38
Because you can't get anyone to agree with you
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Karena tidak mungkin Anda membuat semua orang setuju dengan Anda
03:40
if they don't even listen to you first.
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jika mereka tidak mendengarkan Anda terlebih dahulu.
03:43
We spend so much time talking past each other
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Kita menghabiskan banyak waktu berbicara tentang masa lalu orang lain
03:46
and not enough time talking
through our disagreements,
through our disagreements,
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dan tidak membicarakan ketidaksetujuan kita,
03:49
and if we can start to find
compassion for one another,
compassion for one another,
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dan jika kita dapat mulai menemukan pengertian satu sama lain,
03:53
then we have a shot at building common ground.
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kita dapat membangun dasar bersama.
03:57
It actually sounds really hokey
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Sebenarnya cukup sentimental,
03:59
to say it standing up here,
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untuk mengatakannya di sini,
04:01
but when you try to put it in practice,
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namun saat Anda mencoba mempraktikannya,
04:03
it's really powerful.
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sebenarnya hal ini sangat manjur.
04:05
So someone who says they hate immigrants,
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Jadi seseorang yang berkata mereka membenci pendatang,
04:08
I try to imagine how scared they must be
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saya mencoba membayangkan betapa takutnya mereka
04:10
that their community is changing
from what they've always known.
from what they've always known.
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karena masyarakat mereka berubah dari apa yang dulunya mereka ketahui.
04:13
Or someone who says they
don't like teachers' unions,
don't like teachers' unions,
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Atau seseorang yang tidak menyukai serikat guru,
04:17
I bet they're really devastated to see
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pasti terpukul melihat
04:18
their kid's school going into the gutter,
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sekolah anak-anak mereka hancur
04:20
and they're just looking for someone to blame.
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dan mereka mencari seseorang untuk disalahkan.
04:23
Our challenge is to find the compassion for others
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Tantangan kita adalah mencari kasih sayang terhadap orang lain
04:27
that we want them to have for us.
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seperti yang kita inginkan dari mereka.
04:30
That is emotional correctness.
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Itulah kebenaran emosi.
04:33
I'm not saying it's easy.
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Saya tidak berkata hal ini mudah.
04:35
An average of, like, 5.6 times per day
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Rata-rata, saya harus berhenti dalam 5-6 kali sehari
04:38
I have to stop myself from responding
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saya paksa diri saya untuk tidak menjawab
04:39
to all of my hate mail with a flurry of vile profanities.
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kesemua email benci yang penuh dengan dengan kata-kata kotor dan keji.
04:45
This whole finding compassion
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Penemuan kasih sayang dan landasan bersama
04:48
and common ground with your enemies thing
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dengan musuh Anda ini
04:50
is kind of like a political-spiritual practice for me,
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adalah semacam praktek politik-spiritial bagi saya,
04:53
and I ain't the Dalai Lama.
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dan saya bukan Dalai Lama.
04:56
I'm not perfect, but what I am is optimistic,
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Saya tidak sempurna, namun apa yang saya optimis,
05:02
because I don't just get hate mail.
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karena saya tidak hanya menerima surat kebencian,
05:04
I get a lot of really nice letters, lots of them.
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saya juga menerima banyak surat yang baik.
05:07
And one of my all-time favorites begins,
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Dan salah satu surat favorit saya selama ini adalah,
05:10
"I am not a big fan of your political leanings
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"Saya bukan penggemar berat dari dasar politik Anda
05:13
or your sometimes tortured logic,
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atau logika Anda yang terkadang menyiksa,
05:18
but I'm a big fan of you as a person."
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namun saya penggembar berat Anda sebagai manusia."
05:22
Now this guy doesn't agree with me, yet.
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Kini, orang ini tidak setuju dengan saya, belum.
05:26
(Laughter)
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(Tawa)
05:29
But he's listening, not because of what I said,
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Namun dia mendengarkan, bukan karena apa yang saya katakan
05:32
but because of how I said it,
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namun karena bagaimana saya mengatakannya,
05:34
and somehow, even though we've never met,
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dan entah bagaimana, walaupun kami belum pernah bertemu,
05:36
we've managed to form a connection.
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kami berhasil membuat suatu hubungan.
05:38
That's emotional correctness,
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Itulah kebenaran emosi
05:41
and that's how we start the conversations
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dan itulah bagaimana kita memulai percakapan
05:43
that really lead to change.
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yang benar-benar membawa perubahan.
05:45
Thank you.
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Terima kasih.
05:48
(Applause)
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(Tepuk tangan)
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Sally Kohn - Political punditSally Kohn searches for common ground among political foes by focusing on the compassion and humanity in everyone.
Why you should listen
Sally Kohn has a powerful vision for a more united United States. She's a columnist and a political commentator for CNN, and she is working on a book about hate that will be published in the spring of 2018. As a former contributor to Fox News, this progressive lesbian sparred with some of the most conservative minds on television and has sifted through hundreds of letters of hate mail a day. But she deeply believes in finding our common humanity, political differences aside. Before we can achieve political correctness, we must first establish emotional correctness — and this will ignite conversations that lead to real change.
Kohn has appeared on Fox, MSNBC and CNN and has written for The Daily Beast, Salon, The Atlantic and TIME Magazine.
Sally Kohn | Speaker | TED.com