TED2016
Casey Gerald: The gospel of doubt
凱西．傑拉德: 存疑的禮讚
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當你發覺你曾經堅定不移的信念破滅時會怎麼做？當凱西．傑拉德的信仰崩毀時，他出發尋找一個他可以相信的東西──他的足跡從企業、政府，到慈善事業──卻只找到虛假的救贖。在這個感人的演講中，傑拉德鼓勵大家質疑自己的信念並擁抱不確定性。
Casey Gerald - American
Casey Gerald chronicles the current state of the American Dream and explores ways to sustain it for a new generation. Full bio
Casey Gerald chronicles the current state of the American Dream and explores ways to sustain it for a new generation. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:12
There we were,
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我們身在那裡
00:15
souls and bodies packed
into a Texas church
into a Texas church
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靈魂和身體全塞在一間德州的教堂
00:19
on the last night of our lives.
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度過我們生命的最後一晚
00:22
Packed into a room just like this,
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擠在一個像這樣的房間
00:25
but with creaky wooden pews
draped in worn-down red fabric,
draped in worn-down red fabric,
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但老舊的木長凳上
蓋著的是破損的紅布
蓋著的是破損的紅布
00:31
with an organ to my left
and a choir at my back
and a choir at my back
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而我左方是架管風琴
後方有唱詩班
後方有唱詩班
00:33
and a baptism pool
built into the wall behind them.
built into the wall behind them.
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唱詩班後面的牆後是個受洗池
00:37
A room like this, nonetheless.
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儘管在這樣的空間
00:41
With the same great feelings of suspense,
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大家還是有著一樣強烈的信念
00:45
the same deep hopes for salvation,
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一樣打從心底地等待著救贖
00:48
the same sweat in the palms
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手掌心同樣冒著汗
00:50
and the same people
in the back not paying attention.
in the back not paying attention.
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而坐在後排的人也一樣心不在焉
00:53
(Laughter)
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（笑聲）
00:56
This was December 31, 1999,
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那是 1999 年的 12 月 31 日
01:01
the night of the Second Coming of Christ,
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是耶穌再臨的夜晚
01:04
and the end of the world as I knew it.
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也是我所認知的末日
01:08
I had turned 12 that year
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我那年才 12 歲
01:09
and had reached the age of accountability.
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剛到了問責的年紀
（指開始承擔原罪，對神負責）
（指開始承擔原罪，對神負責）
01:12
And once I stopped complaining
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而當我停止抱怨
01:14
about how unfair it was
that Jesus would return
that Jesus would return
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在我剛開始問責
01:17
as soon as I had to be accountable
for all that I had done,
for all that I had done,
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耶穌就將再臨是多麼的不公平時
01:20
I figured I had better get
my house in order very quickly.
my house in order very quickly.
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我意識到我得趕快振作起來
01:24
So I went to church as often as I could.
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所以我盡可能地去教堂
01:26
I listened for silence as anxiously
as one might listen for noise,
as one might listen for noise,
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我專注並心焦地聆聽著靜默
如人感受著風吹草動般
如人感受著風吹草動般
01:31
trying to be sure that the Lord
hadn't pulled a fast one on me
hadn't pulled a fast one on me
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我試著確定耶和華並不是在捉弄我
01:34
and decided to come back early.
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而選擇這麼早就再臨
01:36
And just in case he did,
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而如果祂真的選擇這麼早再臨
01:38
I built a backup plan,
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我還有個備案
01:41
by reading the "Left Behind" books
that were all the rage at the time.
that were all the rage at the time.
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曾經紅極一時的書《末日迷蹤》
01:45
And I found in their pages
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裡頭告訴我
01:47
that if I was not taken
in the rapture at midnight,
in the rapture at midnight,
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如果我沒有在子夜時分被送到天堂
01:49
I had another shot.
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我就有機會賭一把
01:51
All I had to do was avoid
taking the mark of the beast,
taking the mark of the beast,
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全部要做的就是避免拿到獸之印記
01:55
fight off demons, plagues
and the Antichrist himself.
and the Antichrist himself.
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並打退惡魔和反基督教者
01:58
It would be hard --
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這可能有難度
02:00
(Laughter)
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（笑聲）
02:03
but I knew I could do it.
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但我確信我做得到
02:04
(Laughter)
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（笑聲）
02:06
But planning time was over now.
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我已經沒時間計畫了
02:08
It was 11:50pm.
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已經晚上 11:50
02:10
We had 10 minutes left,
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我們只剩 10 分鐘
02:11
and my pastor called us
out of the pews and down to the altar
out of the pews and down to the altar
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牧師叫大家起身並到壇前
02:14
because he wanted to be praying
when midnight struck.
when midnight struck.
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因為他想在子夜那時祈禱
02:19
So every faction of the congregation
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所以眾教徒
02:21
took its place.
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各就定位
02:23
The choir stayed in the choir stand,
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唱詩班留在原位
02:24
the deacons and their wives --
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而副祭們和他們的老婆
02:26
or the Baptist Bourgeoisie
as I like to call them --
as I like to call them --
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我比較喜歡叫他們
浸信會的中產階級
浸信會的中產階級
02:28
(Laughter)
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（笑聲）
02:30
took first position in front of the altar.
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則坐在壇前第一排
02:32
You see, in America,
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如你所見，在美國
02:34
even the Second Coming of Christ
has a VIP section.
has a VIP section.
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就算耶穌再臨也有 VIP 區
02:37
(Laughter)
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（笑聲）
02:40
(Applause)
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（掌聲）
02:45
And right behind the Baptist Bourgeoisie
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而在這群中產階級的後一排
02:47
were the elderly --
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是長者們
02:49
these men and women whose young backs
had been bent under hot suns
had been bent under hot suns
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這群男女年輕時
在東德州的烈日下彎著腰
在東德州的烈日下彎著腰
02:54
in the cotton fields of East Texas,
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在棉花田裡工作
02:57
and whose skin seemed to be burnt
a creaseless noble brown,
a creaseless noble brown,
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他們的皮膚被炙成了平滑高雅的棕色
03:00
just like the clay of East Texas,
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就如同東德州的泥土
03:03
and whose hopes and dreams
for what life might become
for what life might become
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離開東德州過好生活
這樣的希望和夢想
03:05
outside of East Texas
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03:06
had sometimes been bent and broken
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已經殘破不堪
03:08
even further than their backs.
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甚於他們的背
03:09
Yes, these men and women
were the stars of the show for me.
were the stars of the show for me.
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是的，這群男女
對我來說是今天的主角
對我來說是今天的主角
03:14
They had waited their whole lives
for this moment,
for this moment,
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他們等了一輩子就為了這一刻
03:17
just as their medieval predecessors
had longed for the end of the world,
had longed for the end of the world,
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猶如中世紀的先人期待末日
03:21
and just as my grandmother
waited for the Oprah Winfrey Show
waited for the Oprah Winfrey Show
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也像是我奶奶每天 4 點
03:24
to come on Channel 8
every day at 4 o'clock.
every day at 4 o'clock.
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切到第 8 台等歐普拉的秀一樣
03:28
And as she made her way to the altar,
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當我奶奶走向壇前
03:30
I snuck right in behind her,
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我偷偷尾隨在她身後
03:32
because I knew for sure
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因為我確知
03:34
that my grandmother was going to heaven.
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我奶奶會去天堂
03:37
And I thought that if I held on
to her hand during this prayer,
to her hand during this prayer,
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我想，如果我在禱告時握住她的手
03:42
I might go right on with her.
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我就能跟她一起去
03:44
So I held on
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所以我緊握著手
03:46
and I closed my eyes
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閉上雙眼
03:49
to listen,
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聆聽
03:50
to wait.
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等待
03:52
And the prayers got louder.
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禱告聲越來越大
03:54
And the shouts of response
to the call of the prayer
to the call of the prayer
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此起彼落的呼聲
03:56
went up higher even still.
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使禱告聲更為高亢
03:58
And the organ rolled on in
to add the dirge.
to add the dirge.
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管風琴也加入彈頌哀歌
04:01
And the heat came on to add to the sweat.
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握熱的手心則冒著汗
04:03
And my hand gripped firmer,
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我的手緊握
04:05
so I wouldn't be the one
left in the field.
left in the field.
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以免被留在凡間
04:07
My eyes clenched tighter
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我的雙眼緊閉
04:08
so I wouldn't see the wheat
being separated from the chaff.
being separated from the chaff.
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這樣才看不到麥子從糠中被分離
04:11
And then a voice rang out above us:
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接著是一聲：
04:14
"Amen."
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「阿門」
04:17
It was over.
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一切都結束了
04:20
I looked at the clock.
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我看看時鐘
04:22
It was after midnight.
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已經過了 12 點
04:25
I looked at the elder believers
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我看向那群長者
04:27
whose savior had not come,
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他們的救世主沒來
04:30
who were too proud to show
any signs of disappointment,
any signs of disappointment,
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他們因為驕傲而沒露出一絲的失望
04:33
who had believed too much and for too long
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他們相信得太深太久
04:35
to start doubting now.
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如今也未曾質疑信仰
04:39
But I was upset on their behalf.
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我對他們的反應感到心煩意亂
04:42
They had been duped,
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他們被騙了
04:44
hoodwinked, bamboozled,
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被欺瞞、被哄騙
04:45
and I had gone right along with them.
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而我竟跟他們一起
04:48
I had prayed their prayers,
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我跟著禱告
04:50
I had yielded not to temptation
as best I could.
as best I could.
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我試著不被誘惑
04:53
I had dipped my head not once, but twice
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我也不只一次，而是兩度
04:56
in that snot-inducing baptism pool.
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把頭浸入那讓人流鼻涕的受洗池
04:58
I had believed.
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我曾深信不疑
05:01
Now what?
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現在呢？
05:03
I got home just in time
to turn on the television
to turn on the television
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我及時回家打開電視
05:06
and watch Peter Jennings
announce the new millennium
announce the new millennium
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看彼得．詹寧斯宣告
世界各地前後到來的千禧年
05:09
as it rolled in around the world.
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05:11
It struck me that it would have
been strange anyway,
been strange anyway,
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我突然意識到一件事
05:15
for Jesus to come back again and again
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耶穌在不同時區不停地再臨
05:18
based on the different time zones.
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這樣的話太詭異了
05:19
(Laughter)
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（笑聲）
05:27
And this made me feel
even more ridiculous --
even more ridiculous --
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而這讓我覺得荒謬
05:30
hurt, really.
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心很痛，真的
05:33
But there on that night,
I did not stop believing.
I did not stop believing.
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但我不是在那晚就不再相信
05:37
I just believed a new thing:
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我只是相信了一件新的事情：
05:39
that it was possible not to believe.
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一個人也可以選擇不相信
05:42
It was possible the answers
I had were wrong,
I had were wrong,
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可能我的答案是錯的
05:45
that the questions themselves were wrong.
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而問題本身也可能是錯的
05:47
And now, where there was once
a mountain of certitude,
a mountain of certitude,
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只要有一座代表確信的山峰
05:51
there was, running right down
to its foundation,
to its foundation,
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就會有一條代表懷疑的小溪
05:55
a spring of doubt,
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而小溪往山腳流去
05:57
a spring that promised rivers.
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終會匯聚成河流
06:00
I can trace the whole drama of my life
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我可以將我的人生回溯到
06:03
back to that night in that church
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那晚的教堂
06:05
when my savior did not come for me;
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救世主並沒有前來的那晚
06:08
when the thing I believed most certainly
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當我所相信的事物很明顯地
06:11
turned out to be, if not a lie,
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就算不說是個謊言
06:13
then not quite the truth.
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也不能說是事實的時候
06:16
And even though most of you
prepared for Y2K in a very different way,
prepared for Y2K in a very different way,
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即便在座絕大多數可能
以不同的方式面對千禧年
以不同的方式面對千禧年
06:20
I'm convinced that you are here
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但我相信仍有人跟我一樣
06:23
because some part of you has done
the same thing that I have done
the same thing that I have done
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在這個新世紀的破曉時分
06:27
since the dawn of this new century,
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跟我做了一樣的事
06:30
since my mother left
and my father stayed away
and my father stayed away
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自從我母親的離世
與父親的離去
與父親的離去
06:32
and my Lord refused to come.
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以及主拒絕前來
06:34
And I held out my hand,
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我伸出我的手
06:36
reaching for something to believe in.
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試著探觸、
尋找一個能讓我相信的東西
尋找一個能讓我相信的東西
06:40
I held on when I arrived at Yale at 18,
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我 18 歲時進了耶魯大學
06:44
with the faith that my journey
from Oak Cliff, Texas
from Oak Cliff, Texas
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心想離開了德州的奧克利夫
06:46
was a chance to leave behind
all the challenges I had known,
all the challenges I had known,
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就能夠將我所知的困難
06:50
the broken dreams
and broken bodies I had seen.
and broken bodies I had seen.
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還有殘破的夢想、身形拋諸腦後
06:54
But when I found myself back home
one winter break,
one winter break,
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但當我寒假回家
06:59
with my face planted in the floor,
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臉被壓在地上
07:02
my hands tied behind my back
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手被綁在背後
07:05
and a burglar's gun pressed to my head,
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而竊賊的槍抵著我的腦門時
07:07
I knew that even the best education
couldn't save me.
couldn't save me.
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我知道即使最好的教育也救不了我
07:12
I held on when I showed up
at Lehman Brothers
at Lehman Brothers
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2008 年當我在雷曼兄弟
07:15
as an intern in 2008.
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當實習生時也在尋找
07:19
(Laughter)
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（笑聲）
07:23
So hopeful --
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我充滿希望──
07:25
(Laughter)
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（笑聲）
07:28
that I called home to inform my family
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我打回家告訴家人
07:30
that we'd never be poor again.
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我們不會再貧困了
07:31
(Laughter)
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（笑聲）
07:34
But as I witnessed this temple of finance
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但我親眼見證金融聖殿
07:36
come crashing down before my eyes,
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在我面前坍塌
07:38
I knew that even the best job
couldn't save me.
couldn't save me.
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我知道即便最好的工作也救不了我
07:42
I held on when I showed up
in Washington DC as a young staffer,
in Washington DC as a young staffer,
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我在華盛頓特區當年輕職員時尋找
07:48
who had heard a voice
call out from Illinois,
call out from Illinois,
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聽到來自伊利諾州的聲音
07:50
saying, "It's been a long time coming,
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說：「大家等待很久了，
07:53
but in this election, change
has come to America."
has come to America."
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但在這次的選舉，美國將會改變。」
07:58
But as the Congress ground to a halt
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但國會仍停滯不前
08:00
and the country ripped at the seams
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而國家分崩離析
08:02
and hope and change
began to feel like a cruel joke,
began to feel like a cruel joke,
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希望與改變對我來說
像是個殘酷的玩笑
像是個殘酷的玩笑
08:04
I knew that even
the political second coming
the political second coming
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3307
我知道就算政治重來
08:07
could not save me.
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也救不了我
08:09
I had knelt faithfully at the altar
of the American Dream,
of the American Dream,
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我虔誠地跪在美國夢的祭壇前
08:14
praying to the gods of my time
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向上天祈禱屬於我的
08:17
of success,
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1150
成就
08:18
and money,
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1150
金錢
08:20
and power.
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1150
和權力
08:22
But over and over again,
174
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1826
但一再地
08:24
midnight struck, and I opened my eyes
175
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3043
子夜來臨，而我張眼
08:27
to see that all of these gods were dead.
176
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2468
見到所有的神皆已死
08:31
And from that graveyard,
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而從那個墓園
08:32
I began the search once more,
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我決定再次尋找
08:34
not because I was brave,
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不是因為我很勇敢
08:35
but because I knew
that I would either believe
that I would either believe
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3405
而是我知道我只能選擇相信
08:39
or I would die.
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1227
不然就是死亡
08:40
So I took a pilgrimage
to yet another mecca,
to yet another mecca,
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2791
所以我啟程
向我心目中的麥加朝聖
向我心目中的麥加朝聖
08:44
Harvard Business School --
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1346
哈佛商學院
08:45
(Laughter)
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2504
（笑聲）
08:48
this time, knowing that I could not
simply accept the salvation
simply accept the salvation
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3885
這次，我知道我不能單單接受
它們宣稱會提供的救贖
08:52
that it claimed to offer.
186
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1230
08:53
No, I knew there'd be more work to do.
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不，我知道我還有更多事情要做
08:56
The work began in the dark corner
of a crowded party,
of a crowded party,
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4295
一切開始於一個熱鬧派對的黑暗角落
09:02
in the late night of an early,
miserable Cambridge winter,
miserable Cambridge winter,
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3414
在劍橋初冬，一個令人憂愁的夜晚
09:06
when three friends and I asked a question
190
534457
2036
三個朋友和我問了一個問題
09:08
that young folks searching
for something real have asked
for something real have asked
191
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2650
那是作為年輕小夥子
尋求真諦
尋求真諦
09:11
for a very long time:
192
539191
1767
一直以來會問的問題
09:12
"What if we took a road trip?"
193
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1674
「如果我們去公路旅行怎麼樣？」
09:14
(Laughter)
194
542680
3044
（笑聲）
09:18
We didn't know where'd we go
or how we'd get there,
or how we'd get there,
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2430
我們不知道我們的目的地
也不知道怎麼去
也不知道怎麼去
09:20
but we knew we had to do it.
196
548753
1761
但我們知道做就對了
09:23
Because all our lives we yearned,
as Jack Kerouac wrote,
as Jack Kerouac wrote,
197
551108
3016
我們嚮往的生活
就像傑克．凱魯亞克所寫的
就像傑克．凱魯亞克所寫的
09:26
to "sneak out into the night
and disappear somewhere,"
and disappear somewhere,"
198
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3952
「在夜幕低垂時偷跑出去，
並在某個地方消失無蹤」
並在某個地方消失無蹤」
09:30
and go find out what everybody was doing
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2053
看看這個國家的其他人
09:33
all over the country.
200
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1272
都在做些什麼
09:35
So even though there were
other voices who said
other voices who said
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2277
所以即便有人認為
09:37
that the risk was too great
and the proof too thin,
and the proof too thin,
202
565543
2453
風險太高憑據單薄
09:40
we went on anyhow.
203
568020
1356
我們還是上路了
09:42
We went on 8,000 miles across America
in the summer of 2013,
in the summer of 2013,
204
570354
5272
我們在 2013 年的夏天
跨越了美國 8000 哩
跨越了美國 8000 哩
09:48
through the cow pastures of Montana,
through the desolation of Detroit,
through the desolation of Detroit,
205
576358
3440
經過了蒙大拿的牧場
經過了底特律的荒野
經過了底特律的荒野
09:51
through the swamps of New Orleans,
206
579822
1623
經過了紐奧良的沼澤
09:53
where we found and worked
with men and women
with men and women
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2602
我們在那和人們相遇、共事
09:56
who were building small businesses
208
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1685
他們經營小事業
09:57
that made purpose their bottom line.
209
585804
2945
並將心中的理想置於首位
10:01
And having been trained
at the West Point of capitalism,
at the West Point of capitalism,
210
589962
2686
對哈佛商學院的我們來說
10:04
this struck us as a revolutionary idea.
211
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2104
這真是革命性的想法
10:06
(Laughter)
212
594800
1016
（笑聲）
10:07
And this idea spread,
213
595840
1984
而這個理念最終
10:10
growing into a nonprofit
called MBAs Across America,
called MBAs Across America,
214
598412
3738
成長為一個叫《橫跨美國的 MBA》
的非營利組織
的非營利組織
10:14
a movement that landed me here
on this stage today.
on this stage today.
215
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3409
這也是我今天上台的動機
10:19
It spread because we found
a great hunger in our generation
a great hunger in our generation
216
607620
4177
它因這個世代的渴望而散播
10:23
for purpose, for meaning.
217
611821
2443
對目標、意義的渴望
10:27
It spread because we found
countless entrepreneurs
countless entrepreneurs
218
615317
2698
它為了在美國角落和夾縫中
的企業家而散播
的企業家而散播
10:30
in the nooks and crannies of America
219
618039
1908
10:31
who were creating jobs and changing lives
220
619971
2453
這些企業家創造了
工作和改變生活的機會
工作和改變生活的機會
10:34
and who needed a little help.
221
622448
1529
而他們需要一些幫助
10:37
But if I'm being honest, it also spread
222
625082
3286
但說實話
它也因為我的奮鬥而散播
10:40
because I fought to spread it.
223
628392
1702
10:43
There was no length
to which I would not go
to which I would not go
224
631204
2243
為了傳這個福音
10:45
to preach this gospel,
225
633471
1156
沒有什麼我不會做的
10:46
to get more people to believe
226
634651
2836
只為了讓更多人相信
10:49
that we could bind the wounds
of a broken country,
of a broken country,
227
637511
2399
我們可以用一個個社會企業
10:51
one social business at a time.
228
639934
2157
來包紮受傷的國家
10:55
But it was this journey of evangelism
229
643116
3173
也是這個福音的旅程
10:59
that led me to the rather different gospel
230
647239
2258
帶給我另一個不同的福音
11:02
that I've come to share with you today.
231
650136
2636
也就是我今天要跟各位分享的故事
11:05
It began one evening almost a year ago
232
653867
3212
大概是一年前的某個傍晚
11:10
at the Museum of Natural History
in New York City,
in New York City,
233
658199
3194
在紐約的自然史博物館
11:14
at a gala for alumni
of Harvard Business School.
of Harvard Business School.
234
662371
2752
哈佛商學院的校友聚會
11:18
Under a full-size replica of a whale,
235
666341
2535
在真實比例的鯨魚複製品下
11:21
I sat with the titans of our time
236
669573
2351
我坐在我們這一代的巨人旁
11:23
as they celebrated their peers
and their good deeds.
and their good deeds.
237
671948
2721
他們慶祝他們的優秀事蹟
11:27
There was pride in a room
238
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1284
整個空間充滿自豪之感
11:29
where net worth
and assets under management
and assets under management
239
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2879
他們的淨值和資產
11:31
surpassed half a trillion dollars.
240
679938
2379
就超過了 5000 億美元
11:35
We looked over all that we had made,
241
683196
2007
我們細數所贏得的一切
11:37
and it was good.
242
685863
1165
感覺很好
11:39
(Laughter)
243
687927
1987
（笑聲）
11:42
But it just so happened,
244
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1428
但是
11:44
two days later,
245
692959
1186
兩天之後
11:46
I had to travel up the road to Harlem,
246
694610
2083
我旅行到了紐約哈林區
11:49
where I found myself
sitting in an urban farm
sitting in an urban farm
247
697455
2439
我坐在現代的農場
11:51
that had once been a vacant lot,
248
699918
1785
那裡曾是空地
11:54
listening to a man named Tony
tell me of the kids
tell me of the kids
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702416
2900
聽著一個叫做東尼的男人
告訴我每天都會出現的孩子的故事
11:57
that showed up there every day.
250
705340
1558
11:59
All of them lived below the poverty line.
251
707944
3323
他們都活在貧窮門檻之下
12:04
Many of them carried
all of their belongings in a backpack
all of their belongings in a backpack
252
712075
3420
很多人的背包就背著他所有的家當
12:07
to avoid losing them
in a homeless shelter.
in a homeless shelter.
253
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2185
避免在無家可歸的情況下失去它們
12:10
Some of them came to Tony's program,
254
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3248
有些人加入了東尼的計畫
12:13
called Harlem Grown,
255
721704
1347
叫《哈林栽培》
12:15
to get the only meal they had each day.
256
723677
2347
來領取每天僅有的一餐
12:19
Tony told me that he started Harlem Grown
with money from his pension,
with money from his pension,
257
727465
4615
東尼創《哈林栽培》的資金
是他的養老金
是他的養老金
12:24
after 20 years as a cab driver.
258
732954
2253
他開了計程車 20 年
12:28
He told me that he didn't give
himself a salary,
himself a salary,
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2319
他告訴我他沒付自己薪水
12:31
because despite success,
the program struggled for resources.
the program struggled for resources.
260
739342
3842
因為儘管成功
計畫還是會缺資源
計畫還是會缺資源
12:35
He told me that he would take any help
261
743993
2107
他說他接受任何
12:38
that he could get.
262
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1157
他能得到的幫助
12:40
And I was there as that help.
263
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2646
而我就可以是那個幫助者
12:44
But as I left Tony,
I felt the sting and salt of tears
I felt the sting and salt of tears
264
752863
4295
但當我揮別東尼
我感到淚水的刺痛和鹹苦
我感到淚水的刺痛和鹹苦
12:49
welling up in my eyes.
265
757838
1537
從我眼中奪眶而出
12:52
I felt the weight of revelation
266
760509
1965
我感受到了啟示的重量
12:55
that I could sit in one room on one night,
267
763187
3132
我可以在一個晚上
12:59
where a few hundred people
had half a trillion dollars,
had half a trillion dollars,
268
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4102
和幾百個身價 5000 億的人共處一室
13:04
and another room, two days later,
269
772187
2061
但兩天過後的另一個空間
13:06
just 50 blocks up the road,
270
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2297
就在 50 個街區外
13:09
where a man was going without a salary
271
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2244
有一個男人無薪地
13:12
to get a child her only meal of the day.
272
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2894
給孩子一天的唯一一餐
13:16
And it wasn't the glaring inequality
that made me want to cry,
that made me want to cry,
273
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3530
並不是這明顯的不平等讓我想哭
13:20
it wasn't the thought of hungry,
homeless kids,
homeless kids,
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788441
2811
不是飢餓和無家可歸的孩子讓我想哭
13:23
it wasn't rage toward the one percent
275
791276
1836
也不是 1% 對上
13:25
or pity toward the 99.
276
793136
2278
可憐的 99% 讓我想哭
13:27
No, I was disturbed
because I had finally realized
because I had finally realized
277
795787
3785
我不安是因為我終於意識到
13:32
that I was the dialysis
278
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2269
我可以作為一台洗腎機
13:34
for a country that needed
a kidney transplant.
a kidney transplant.
279
802623
3197
幫助這個亟需腎臟移植的國家
13:38
I realized that my story
stood in for all those
stood in for all those
280
806647
3669
我意識到我的故事
幫助了那些想要白手起家的人
13:42
who were expected to pick
themselves up by their bootstraps,
themselves up by their bootstraps,
281
810340
2842
13:45
even if they didn't have any boots;
282
813206
2146
就算他們幾乎一無所有
13:48
that my organization stood in
283
816182
1673
我意識到我的機構
13:49
for all the structural, systemic help
that never went to Harlem
that never went to Harlem
284
817879
3750
推動了結構性、系統性的援助
到達未曾觸及的哈林區
阿帕拉契或下九區
阿帕拉契或下九區
13:53
or Appalachia or the Lower 9th Ward;
285
821653
1945
13:55
that my voice stood in
for all those voices
for all those voices
286
823622
4779
我意識到我的聲音幫助了那些
14:01
that seemed too unlearned,
too unwashed, too unaccommodated.
too unwashed, too unaccommodated.
287
829098
5143
沒受教育、沒被洗禮、
難以適應社會者的聲音
難以適應社會者的聲音
14:07
And the shame of that,
288
835273
1265
而那種羞赧
14:09
that shame washed over me
289
837721
1387
讓我覺得像是
14:11
like the shame of sitting
in front of the television,
in front of the television,
290
839132
2861
那時坐在電視前的羞辱
14:14
watching Peter Jennings
announce the new millennium
announce the new millennium
291
842898
2499
看著彼得．詹寧斯宣告千禧年的到來
14:17
again
292
845421
1208
一次
14:18
and again
293
846653
1150
一次
14:20
and again.
294
848257
1150
又一次
14:21
I had been duped,
295
849796
1150
我那時被騙了
14:24
hoodwinked,
296
852084
1150
被欺瞞
14:25
bamboozled.
297
853696
1150
被哄騙
14:27
But this time, the false savior was me.
298
855403
3074
但這次，我竟是
那位犯錯的救世主
那位犯錯的救世主
14:31
You see, I've come a long way
from that altar
from that altar
299
859600
3702
如你所見
我走了很長的一段路
我走了很長的一段路
14:35
on the night I thought
the world would end,
the world would end,
300
863326
2096
從那天晚上我以為
世界將要毀滅的祭壇
世界將要毀滅的祭壇
14:38
from a world where people spoke in tongues
301
866371
2205
從那個存在各種方言的世界
14:41
and saw suffering
as a necessary act of God
as a necessary act of God
302
869107
2638
人們視苦難為上帝的必要工作
14:44
and took a text to be infallible truth.
303
872222
2068
並視一本書為萬無一失的真相
14:46
Yes, I've come so far
304
874314
1525
沒錯，我走了很長的一段路
14:48
that I'm right back where I started.
305
876607
2536
並回到了最初的起點
14:52
Because it simply is not true to say
306
880103
2215
要說我活在不相信的年代
明顯是錯的
明顯是錯的
14:54
that we live in an age of disbelief --
307
882342
1881
不，我們跟以前一樣都相信著
14:56
no, we believe today just as much
as any time that came before.
as any time that came before.
308
884247
4316
15:01
Some of us may believe
in the prophecy of Brené Brown
in the prophecy of Brené Brown
309
889409
2843
我們有些人可能
相信布芮尼．布朗
相信布芮尼．布朗
15:04
or Tony Robbins.
310
892276
1176
或東尼．羅賓斯的「預言」
15:06
We may believe in the bible
of The New Yorker
of The New Yorker
311
894003
2100
我們可能相信《紐約客》
15:08
or the Harvard Business Review.
312
896127
1610
或《哈佛商業評論》的「聖經」
15:10
We may believe most deeply
313
898146
1579
我們可能更深信
15:12
when we worship right here
at the church of TED,
at the church of TED,
314
900150
2602
這個 TED 的「教堂」
15:15
but we desperately want to believe,
315
903347
2181
我們不顧一切地想要相信
15:17
we need to believe.
316
905552
1546
我們需要去相信
15:20
We speak in the tongues
of charismatic leaders
of charismatic leaders
317
908001
2185
我們成為那些保證
15:22
that promise to solve all our problems.
318
910210
2192
會解決問題的領袖的唇舌
15:24
We see suffering as a necessary act
of the capitalism that is our god,
of the capitalism that is our god,
319
912426
4080
我們視苦難為資本主義的必要因素
15:28
we take the text of technological progress
320
916530
2232
我們視科技進展
15:31
to be infallible truth.
321
919540
1693
為萬無一失的真理
15:34
And we hardly realize
the human price we pay
the human price we pay
322
922034
3616
但我們鮮少發覺
那些未曾質疑的根本
那些未曾質疑的根本
15:38
when we fail to question one brick,
323
926412
2350
將讓我們付出多少代價
15:41
because we fear it might shake
our whole foundation.
our whole foundation.
324
929692
2949
因為我們怕它會撼動整座基石
15:45
But if you are disturbed
325
933677
1601
但若你對我們一直以來都接受、
15:48
by the unconscionable things
that we have come to accept,
that we have come to accept,
326
936080
3130
不曾存疑的事情感到不安
15:51
then it must be questioning time.
327
939777
2906
那是時候懷疑了
15:55
So I have not a gospel
of disruption or innovation
of disruption or innovation
328
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所以我並沒有什麼關於顛覆、創新
16:00
or a triple bottom line.
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或是商業價值的福音
16:02
I do not have a gospel of faith
to share with you today, in fact.
to share with you today, in fact.
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也並沒有什麼
關於信念的福音要與你分享
關於信念的福音要與你分享
16:07
I have and I offer a gospel of doubt.
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我提供給各位的是存疑的禮讚
16:12
The gospel of doubt does not ask
that you stop believing,
that you stop believing,
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這並不是叫你不去相信
16:15
it asks that you believe a new thing:
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是教你相信一件新的事：
16:18
that it is possible not to believe.
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一個人也可以選擇不相信
16:21
It is possible the answers
we have are wrong,
we have are wrong,
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有可能我們現有的解答是錯的
16:23
it is possible the questions
themselves are wrong.
themselves are wrong.
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有可能問題本身是錯的
16:26
Yes, the gospel of doubt means
that it is possible that we,
that it is possible that we,
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沒錯！存疑的禮讚
也代表了，我們
也代表了，我們
16:30
on this stage, in this room,
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在這個舞台
在這個空間
在這個空間
16:33
are wrong.
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都是錯的
16:34
Because it raises the question, "Why?"
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因為這才能引出問題：「為什麼？」
16:37
With all the power
that we hold in our hands,
that we hold in our hands,
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我們手中已握有了這樣的力量
16:40
why are people still suffering so bad?
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但為什麼人們還是受苦受難
16:45
This doubt leads me to share
that we are putting my organization,
that we are putting my organization,
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這份懷疑讓我跟大家分享
我們要將我們的組織
《橫跨美國的 MBA》
《橫跨美國的 MBA》
16:49
MBAs Across America,
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16:51
out of business.
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帶出商業圈
16:52
We have shed our staff
and closed our doors
and closed our doors
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我們解散員工並關閉大門
16:55
and we will share our model freely
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並會免費將我們的模式分享
16:57
with anyone who sees
their power to do this work
their power to do this work
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給任何認為自己有能力
勝任這份工作的人
勝任這份工作的人
17:00
without waiting for our permission.
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不用等我們許可
17:02
This doubt compels me
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這份懷疑驅使我
17:05
to renounce the role of savior
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拋棄別人加諸於我的
救世主的角色
救世主的角色
17:07
that some have placed on me,
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17:08
because our time is too short
and our odds are too long
and our odds are too long
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因為我們的時間不多
而等待耶穌再臨的機會
而等待耶穌再臨的機會
17:12
to wait for second comings,
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又要等太久
17:13
when the truth is that
there will be no miracles here.
there will be no miracles here.
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而事實是這世上沒有奇蹟
17:18
And this doubt, it fuels me,
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這份懷疑，點燃了我
17:20
it gives me hope
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給我希望
17:22
that when our troubles overwhelm us,
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當困境壟罩之時
17:25
when the paths laid out for us
seem to lead to our demise,
seem to lead to our demise,
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當山窮水盡之時
17:30
when our healers bring
no comfort to our wounds,
no comfort to our wounds,
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當醫者都無法
減輕我們的痛苦時
減輕我們的痛苦時
17:34
it will not be our blind faith --
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支撐我們的不是盲目的信念
17:37
no, it will be our humble doubt
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而是我們謙卑的懷疑
17:40
that shines a little light
into the darkness of our lives
into the darkness of our lives
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它將使我們人生的陰暗
17:44
and of our world
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撥雲見日
17:45
and lets us raise our voice to whisper
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讓我們張嘴耳語
17:48
or to shout
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或張嘴吶喊
17:50
or to say simply,
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或只是單純
17:52
very simply,
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簡單地說出：
17:53
"There must be another way."
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「一定還有別的解答」
17:57
Thank you.
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謝謝大家
17:58
(Applause)
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（掌聲）
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Casey Gerald - AmericanCasey Gerald chronicles the current state of the American Dream and explores ways to sustain it for a new generation.
Why you should listen
Casey Gerald has witnessed every facet of the American Dream -- from his harrowing childhood in Texas, to his tenure at the heights of America's elite institutions, to his journeys through the cities and towns of the American heartland where he has spent his recent years as cofounder and CEO of MBAs Across America. Now his work as a writer, speaker, and business leader centers on the question: will the American dream survive another generation?
Gerald began his career in economic policy and government innovation at the Center for American Progress, and he has worked as a strategist with startup social ventures such as The Future Project as well as companies like The Neiman Marcus Group.
Born and raised in Dallas, Gerald received an MBA from Harvard Business School, where he delivered the 2014 commencement address, and a BA in Political Science from Yale College. He has been featured on MSNBC, in The New York Times, Financial Times, The Guardian, and he has appeared on the cover of Fast Company, which also named him one of the "Most Creative People in Business." He currently serves on the advisory board of NPR's Generation Listen.
Casey Gerald | Speaker | TED.com