Sophie Andrews: The best way to help is often just to listen
苏菲·安德鲁兹: 聆听是最好的帮助
Sophie Andrews is the CEO of The Silver Line, a 24-hour phone line that provides social connectivity for isolated senior citizens in the UK and receives approximately 1,500 calls per day. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
用一块碎玻璃划破手腕,
on the railway station platform.
疲惫不堪的梦魇。
when the station toilets were opened,
and made her way over to them.
for three months, not three days.
而不是仅仅三天。
just started the bleeding again.
she would go to a hospital.
to cover the blood.
but was past caring.
但是这已经不重要了。
she could think of doing.
and into a phone box nearby.
有什么需要吗?
我能为您做些什么?
You sound very upset.
How old are you?
to make you so upset?
Every day I wake up and wish I was dead.
都希望自己已经死了。
I want to do it myself.
ask the girl about herself.
询问有关小女孩的事情。
there were lots of silences.
felt so comforting.
that made that call was me.
sleeping rough on the streets in London.
by my father and his friends.
对我实施了性虐待。
I was suicidal.
I was 12 and absolutely desperate.
是 12 岁的时候。
my mother had deserted me,
独自离开家,
at the hands of my father and his friends
helpline in the UK
的机密服务热线,
desperate or suicidal.
或有自杀倾向的人,
around the clock every day of the year,
when I was most desperate,
found my story, they never showed it.
但却没有表现出来,
and listened without judgment.
encouraged me to get help;
in every other aspect of my life.
was probably the only area
some control in my life.
with what had happened.
rather than a victim.
联系了撒玛利亚会,
to become a volunteer.
that had really saved my life.
in an empathetic way
聆听他人虽然简单,
listening to me without judgment
to give me a job,
at Samaritans.
做志愿者的时光。
it's an odd word to use,
to think of anyone
of that listening ear
at that desperate time
认真聆听我的人,
as a Samaritan.
I was asked to perform many roles.
我扮演过许多角色。
the organization for three years.
from that vulnerable caller
for the organization
screwed up as a caller,
的工作主导着这个世界,
by professionalizing everything we do,
that that simple act of listening
across all areas of life.
我向撒玛利亚会求助的时候,
no one wanted to talk about.
victims were often judged.
and no one really wanted to talk about it.
因为觉得那是奇耻大辱。
surround a different issue.
that's out there.
is to talk about loneliness.
have profound health impacts.
对健康影响很大,
on your own well-being.
进行了系统的考察,
the mortality rates,
higher levels of depression,
with alcohol abuse or smoking cigarettes.
that smoking 15 cigarettes.
不是一辈子吸 15 根——
with higher levels of dementia.
of Alzheimer's disease.
的机率是一般人的两倍。
that live alone who are not lonely.
的人并不感到孤独,
that maybe has dementia
a very good, clear definition
对孤独进行了
unwelcome feeling
与期望的人际关系
of relationships that we have
I've ever received
in an empathetic way.
I'm speaking to a room of professionals,
giving up their time
in a confidential way,
保守秘密来倾听我的诉说,
life-changing effect for me.
天翻地覆的改变。
that really stayed with me.
in my teenage years,
每天都在想还要不要活下去,
wondering if I'd even live the next day.
listening to me stayed with me.
始终陪伴着我。
with what had happened,
in a transforming way
volunteering with Samaritans.
做了 25 年志愿者,以此作为回报。
and the new stigma of loneliness,
人们不愿启齿的遭遇,
helpline in the UK for older people,
新的服务热线来帮助老年人,
lonely and isolated older people.
we've taken 1.5 million calls.
但我们已经接听了 150 万个电话。
based on the feedback we get every day.
我们的影响力在扩大。
for a friendly chat,
是想进行一场愉快的交流,
about local services.
because they're suicidal.
是因为他们有自杀倾向,
because they're reporting abuse.
may have simply just given up on life.
想要放弃生命。
setting up a helpline.
这是多么简单的一件事。
of chief exec, but in the early days,
的崇高称号的时候,
the best meetings ever in my career --
最棒的一次会议了——
listening to older people
接听老年人热线的员工,
making weekly friendship calls
that like the written word,
提供写信的渠道,Sliver Letter,
and we write pen-pal letters
receiving a letter.
something called Silver Circles --
the word "silver" here --
这是我们的标志。
群体会谈形式的电话,
talk about shared interests.
play musical instruments
desperation, loneliness and isolation.
都是绝望、孤独和寂寞。
you would also hear laughter.
在英国的热线,就可以听到欢笑声。
the wonderful lives of older people
老年人们精彩的生活,
just a snippet of one of our calls.
其中一个热线电话的片段。
you're through to the Silver Line.
the telephone is, you know?
invention, isn't it?
when I was a little girl,
a phone call to somebody,
and have your phone call.
just whenever you fancied.
随心所欲地打电话。
to the absolute essentials.
才能打电话。
in my dressing gown still,
坐在自己家里打着电话,
isn't it wonderful?
(笑声)
we might receive at our helpline.
这样的情况并不少见。
as part of the family.
are now helping older people
that Samaritans has helped me.
认真聆听,完全保密,
they're listening confidentially
without giving advice?
只是聆听而不提供建议了?
an older person would say,
“谢谢你的建议”。
"Thank you for your advice,"
and we haven't interrupted.
我们的确提供了建议。
maybe we have given advice.
a survey at The Silver Line
进行了一项反馈调查,
这一热线服务的看法。
what they thought of the service.
came back and said,
in the sport cricket a wicketkeeper,
一名板球守门员的角色,
in baseball, a catcher.
and I'm talking American.
说话就带有美国范儿了,
他们肯定都认不出我来了。
when I get home.
she had that catcher,
because actually,
and needing a catcher
寻求帮助的人越来越多,
by putting something back
如今也开始帮助他人,
and becoming part of our family.
加入了我们的大家庭。
talking about my own personal experience.
我也想用自己的经历结束这个演讲。
I often say that I've been lucky.
at every stage of my life,
alongside me at the right time
in myself, which has been so important.
at some point in their lives.
in the phone box, over 30 years ago.
the power of a simple human connection.
人与人之间简单的交流,
the power to save a life.
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Sophie Andrews - Author, helpline advocateSophie Andrews is the CEO of The Silver Line, a 24-hour phone line that provides social connectivity for isolated senior citizens in the UK and receives approximately 1,500 calls per day.
Why you should listen
Sophie Andrews's harrowing childhood experiences, documented in her 2009 autobiography, Scarred, inspired her to become a local volunteer for the suicide prevention line Samaritans over 25 years ago, and she later served as the organization's national chairman for three years. Andrews makes regular appearances as a motivational speaker before a variety of audiences, giving talks about her life experiences and the importance of charity work.
Sophie Andrews | Speaker | TED.com