Sophie Andrews: The best way to help is often just to listen
蘇菲安德魯斯: 最好的協助方式常常只是單純的傾聽
Sophie Andrews is the CEO of The Silver Line, a 24-hour phone line that provides social connectivity for isolated senior citizens in the UK and receives approximately 1,500 calls per day. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
on the railway station platform.
斷斷續續、讓她疲憊不堪的昏睡。
when the station toilets were opened,
and made her way over to them.
for three months, not three days.
三個月,不是三天。
just started the bleeding again.
she would go to a hospital.
但她不要去醫院。
to cover the blood.
but was past caring.
但她早就不在乎了。
she could think of doing.
and into a phone box nearby.
附近的一個電話亭中。
You sound very upset.
妳聽起來非常沮喪。
妳的名字開始,好嗎?
How old are you?
to make you so upset?
讓妳這麼沮喪?
Every day I wake up and wish I was dead.
每天我起床都希望我死了。
I want to do it myself.
那我想,我也會親自下手。
ask the girl about herself.
問這個女孩關於她的事。
there were lots of silences.
felt so comforting.
感覺很讓人欣慰。
that made that call was me.
sleeping rough on the streets in London.
by my father and his friends.
I was suicidal.
I was 12 and absolutely desperate.
撒瑪利亞會時,當時非常絕望。
my mother had deserted me,
at the hands of my father and his friends
helpline in the UK
保密諮詢服務電話,
desperate or suicidal.
around the clock every day of the year,
都有志工會接電話,
when I was most desperate,
found my story, they never showed it.
但他們都沒表現出來。
and listened without judgment.
傾聽,沒有評斷。
encouraged me to get help;
in every other aspect of my life.
每個面向都感到很失控。
was probably the only area
some control in my life.
我的人生中取得一些控制。
with what had happened.
rather than a victim.
聯絡了撒瑪利亞會。
to become a volunteer.
that had really saved my life.
in an empathetic way
listening to me without judgment
只是傾聽我說話,
to give me a job,
at Samaritans.
撒瑪利亞會的志工工作。
it's an odd word to use,
to think of anyone
of that listening ear
at that desperate time
as a Samaritan.
I was asked to perform many roles.
我被要求扮演許多角色。
the organization for three years.
from that vulnerable caller
for the organization
screwed up as a caller,
by professionalizing everything we do,
把我們做的每件事都職業化,
that that simple act of listening
這個簡單的行為
across all areas of life.
給撒瑪利亞會時,
no one wanted to talk about.
victims were often judged.
受害者通常會被評斷。
and no one really wanted to talk about it.
沒有人想要談它。
surround a different issue.
圍繞著不同的議題。
that's out there.
is to talk about loneliness.
have profound health impacts.
on your own well-being.
安康有重大的影響。
the mortality rates,
higher levels of depression,
更高度的憂鬱,
with alcohol abuse or smoking cigarettes.
that smoking 15 cigarettes.
with higher levels of dementia.
of Alzheimer's disease.
風險是兩倍高。
that live alone who are not lonely.
that maybe has dementia
a very good, clear definition
就很清楚地定義了
unwelcome feeling
不受歡迎的感覺,
of relationships that we have
和「我們想要的關係」之間的質與量
I've ever received
in an empathetic way.
I'm speaking to a room of professionals,
觀眾都是專業人士,
giving up their time
in a confidential way,
life-changing effect for me.
that really stayed with me.
in my teenage years,
wondering if I'd even live the next day.
想著我會不會活到明天。
listening to me stayed with me.
始終一直與我同在。
with what had happened,
那段往事活下去時,
in a transforming way
這些協助而有所轉變的人,
volunteering with Samaritans.
撒瑪利亞會當二十五年的志工。
and the new stigma of loneliness,
以及相關的汙名,
helpline in the UK for older people,
諮詢服務電話,對象是老人。
lonely and isolated older people.
孤獨和孤立的老人。
we've taken 1.5 million calls.
接了一百五十萬通電話。
based on the feedback we get every day.
我知道我們的影響很大。
for a friendly chat,
能進行友善的聊天,
about local services.
because they're suicidal.
because they're reporting abuse.
他們要通報虐待事件。
may have simply just given up on life.
單純就是已經放棄了人生。
setting up a helpline.
設立一支服務電話。
of chief exec, but in the early days,
就是執行長,
the best meetings ever in my career --
我職涯中最棒的會議──
現在,2017 年,
listening to older people
負責傾聽老人,
making weekly friendship calls
每週會從他們自己家中
that like the written word,
and we write pen-pal letters
我們會寫筆友式的書信,
receiving a letter.
something called Silver Circles --
我用「銀」這個字──
the word "silver" here --
服務就是我們的。
talk about shared interests.
play musical instruments
desperation, loneliness and isolation.
絕望、孤獨及孤立。
you would also hear laughter.
諮詢服務電話,你也會聽見笑聲。
the wonderful lives of older people
just a snippet of one of our calls.
接到的電話中的一小部分。
you're through to the Silver Line.
很棒的東西,你知道嗎?
the telephone is, you know?
invention, isn't it?
when I was a little girl,
a phone call to somebody,
and have your phone call.
才能打你要打的電話。
just whenever you fancied.
to the absolute essentials.
in my dressing gown still,
家裡,還穿著浴袍,
isn't it wonderful?
we might receive at our helpline.
服務常接到這類電話。
as part of the family.
are now helping older people
that Samaritans has helped me.
they're listening confidentially
without giving advice?
an older person would say,
"Thank you for your advice,"
「謝謝你的建議。」
and we haven't interrupted.
maybe we have given advice.
我們就是給了建議了。
a survey at The Silver Line
what they thought of the service.
他們對這項服務的看法。
came back and said,
in the sport cricket a wicketkeeper,
運動中說的守門手,
in baseball, a catcher.
就開始說美語了(棒球),
and I'm talking American.
when I get home.
she had that catcher,
第一次有了一個捕手,
because actually,
且需要捕手的人,
and needing a catcher
by putting something back
讓自己也成了捕手。
and becoming part of our family.
talking about my own personal experience.
回到一開始我自己的個人經驗。
I often say that I've been lucky.
我通常都會說我很幸運。
at every stage of my life,
alongside me at the right time
in myself, which has been so important.
而這是非常重要的。
at some point in their lives.
時候會需要一個捕手。
in the phone box, over 30 years ago.
在電話亭裡打了電話。
the power of a simple human connection.
簡單人類連結的力量。
the power to save a life.
拯救一條生命的力量。
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Sophie Andrews - Author, helpline advocateSophie Andrews is the CEO of The Silver Line, a 24-hour phone line that provides social connectivity for isolated senior citizens in the UK and receives approximately 1,500 calls per day.
Why you should listen
Sophie Andrews's harrowing childhood experiences, documented in her 2009 autobiography, Scarred, inspired her to become a local volunteer for the suicide prevention line Samaritans over 25 years ago, and she later served as the organization's national chairman for three years. Andrews makes regular appearances as a motivational speaker before a variety of audiences, giving talks about her life experiences and the importance of charity work.
Sophie Andrews | Speaker | TED.com