TEDxWomen 2011
Tan Le: My immigration story
Tan Le: Moja doseljenička priča
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Godine 2010. tehnologinja Tan Le na konferenciji TEDGlobal pokazala je novo moćno sučelje. Sada na konferenciji TEDxWomen pripovijeda veoma osobnu priču o svojoj obitelji: o majci, baki i sestri, o bijegu iz Vijetnama i izgradnji novoga života.
Tan Le - Entrepreneur
Tan Le is the founder & CEO of Emotiv, a bioinformatics company that's working on identifying biomarkers for mental and other neurological conditions using electroencephalography (EEG). Full bio
Tan Le is the founder & CEO of Emotiv, a bioinformatics company that's working on identifying biomarkers for mental and other neurological conditions using electroencephalography (EEG). Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:15
How can I speak in 10 minutes
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Kako u 10 minuta mogu govoriti
00:18
about the bonds of women over three generations,
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o vezama žena triju generacija,
00:21
about how the astonishing strength of those bonds
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o tome kakvu su začuđujuću snagu te njihove veze
00:24
took hold in the life
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imale u životu
00:26
of a four-year-old girl
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četverogodišnje djevojčice
00:28
huddled with her young sister,
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zarobljene sa svojom mlađom sestrom,
00:30
her mother and her grandmother
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majkom i bakom
00:32
for five days and nights
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pet dana i noći
00:34
in a small boat in the China Sea
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u malom brodu u Kineskom moru
00:36
more than 30 years ago,
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prije više od 30 godina,
00:39
bonds that took hold in the life of that small girl
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veze koje su zauzele određeno mjesto u životu te male djevojčice
00:41
and never let go --
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i nikada je nisu pustile --
00:44
that small girl now living in San Francisco
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ta malena djevojčica sada živi u San Franciscu
00:46
and speaking to you today?
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i danas vam govori.
00:49
This is not a finished story.
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Ovo nije završena priča.
00:52
It is a jigsaw puzzle still being put together.
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To je slagalica koja se još slaže.
00:55
Let me tell you about some of the pieces.
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Dopustite da vam kažem nešto o pojedinim dijelovima.
00:59
Imagine the first piece:
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Zamislite prvi dio:
01:01
a man burning his life's work.
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čovjek koji pali svoje životno djelo.
01:04
He is a poet, a playwright,
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On je pjesnik, dramski pisac,
01:07
a man whose whole life
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čovjek čiji je cijeli život
01:09
had been balanced on the single hope
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bio utemeljen na jedinstvenoj nadi
01:11
of his country's unity and freedom.
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za ujedinjenjem i slobodom njegove zemlje.
01:14
Imagine him as the communists enter Saigon,
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Zamislite ga dok komunisti ulaze u Saigon,
01:17
confronting the fact
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dok se suočava sa činjenicom
01:19
that his life had been a complete waste.
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da je njegov život bio potpuno traćenje vremena.
01:21
Words, for so long his friends, now mocked him.
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Riječi, tako dugo njegove prijateljice, sada su mu se rugale.
01:24
He retreated into silence.
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Povukao se u tišinu.
01:27
He died broken by history.
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Umro je slomljen poviješću.
01:31
He is my grandfather.
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On je moj djed.
01:33
I never knew him in real life.
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Nikada ga nisam upoznala,
01:37
But our lives are much more than our memories.
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no naši su životi mnogo više od naših sjećanja.
01:41
My grandmother never let me forget his life.
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Moja baka nikada nije dopustila da zaboravim njegov život.
01:44
My duty was not to allow it to have been in vain,
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Moja je dužnost bila ne dopustiti da bude uzaludno
01:47
and my lesson was to learn
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i moja je lekcija bila naučiti
01:49
that, yes, history tried to crush us,
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da nas je povijest pokušala slomiti,
01:52
but we endured.
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ali mi smo izdržali.
01:54
The next piece of the jigsaw
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Sljedeći je dio slagalice
01:56
is of a boat in the early dawn
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brodić koji u ranu zoru
01:58
slipping silently out to sea.
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tiho klizi u more.
02:01
My mother, Mai, was 18
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Moja majka Mai imala je 18 godina
02:03
when her father died --
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kad joj je umro otac –
02:05
already in an arranged marriage,
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već u dogovorenom braku
02:07
already with two small girls.
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s dvije male djevojčice.
02:10
For her, life had distilled itself into one task:
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Njen život sveo se na jedan zadatak:
02:13
the escape of her family
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bijeg njene obitelji
02:15
and a new life in Australia.
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i nov život u Australiji.
02:18
It was inconceivable to her
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Bilo joj je nezamislivo
02:20
that she would not succeed.
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da ne uspije.
02:22
So after a four-year saga that defies fiction,
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Nakon četverogodišnje sage koja premašuje fikciju,
02:25
a boat slipped out to sea
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brodić je skliznuo u more
02:27
disguised as a fishing vessel.
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prerušen u ribarski brod.
02:30
All the adults knew the risks.
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Svi su odrasli bili svjesni rizika.
02:33
The greatest fear was of pirates,
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Najveći strah bio je od gusara,
02:35
rape and death.
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silovanja i smrti.
02:37
Like most adults on the boat,
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Kao i većina odraslih na brodiću,
02:39
my mother carried a small bottle of poison.
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moja je majka nosila malu bočicu otrova.
02:43
If we were captured, first my sister and I,
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Da su nas zarobili, prvo bi popile sestra i ja,
02:46
then she and my grandmother would drink.
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a onda ona i moja baka.
02:50
My first memories are from the boat --
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Moja su prva sjećanja s brodića –
02:52
the steady beat of the engine,
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postojan ritam motora,
02:54
the bow dipping into each wave,
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pramac koji ulazi u svaki val,
02:57
the vast and empty horizon.
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prostran i prazan horizont.
03:00
I don't remember the pirates who came many times,
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Ne sjećam se gusara koji su došli mnogo puta,
03:03
but were bluffed by the bravado
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ali su zavarani iznimnom hrabrošću
03:05
of the men on our boat,
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muškaraca s našeg broda,
03:07
or the engine dying
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niti se sjećam kako nam je motor otkazao
03:09
and failing to start for six hours.
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i nije se pokrenuo šest sati.
03:12
But I do remember the lights on the oil rig
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Ali sjećam se svjetla na platformi za podmorsko bušenje
03:14
off the Malaysian coast
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na Malezijskoj obali
03:16
and the young man who collapsed and died,
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i mladića koji se srušio i umro,
03:19
the journey's end too much for him,
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kraj putovanja bio je previše za njega.
03:22
and the first apple I tasted,
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I sjećam se prve jabuke koju sam okusila,
03:24
given to me by the men on the rig.
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a dao mi ju je muškarac s platforme.
03:27
No apple has ever tasted the same.
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Nijedna jabuka poslije nije imala isti okus.
03:32
After three months in a refugee camp,
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Nakon tri mjeseca u izbjegličkom kampu,
03:34
we landed in Melbourne.
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stigli smo u Melbourne.
03:36
And the next piece of the jigsaw
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A sljedeći je dio slagalice
03:38
is about four women across three generations
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o četiri žene unutar triju generacija
03:41
shaping a new life together.
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koje zajedno oblikuju nov život.
03:44
We settled in Footscray,
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Nastanile smo se u Footscrayu,
03:46
a working-class suburb
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radničkom predgrađu
03:48
whose demographic is layers of immigrants.
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koje vrvi slojevima doseljenika.
03:51
Unlike the settled middle-class suburbs,
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Za razliku od predgrađa nastanjenog srednjim slojem,
03:53
whose existence I was oblivious of,
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čijeg postojanja nisam bila svjesna,
03:55
there was no sense of entitlement in Footscray.
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u Footscrayu nije bilo osjećaja za pravdu.
03:58
The smells from shop doors were from the rest of the world.
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Mirisi s vrata dućana dolazili su iz ostatka svijeta.
04:01
And the snippets of halting English
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Ljudi su se sporazumijevali slabim
04:03
were exchanged between people
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engleskim jezikom i
04:05
who had one thing in common,
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jedno im je bilo zajedničko:
04:07
they were starting again.
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kretali su ispočetka.
04:10
My mother worked on farms,
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Moja je majka radila na farmama,
04:12
then on a car assembly line,
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zatim na pokretnoj traci s automobilima,
04:14
working six days, double shifts.
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radeći šest dana duple smjene.
04:16
Somehow she found time to study English
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Nekako je pronašla vremena za učenje engleskog jezika
04:19
and gain IT qualifications.
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i stjecanje informatičkog obrazovanja.
04:21
We were poor.
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Bili smo siromašni.
04:23
All the dollars were allocated
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Svi su dolari bili raspodijeljeni
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and extra tuition in English and mathematics
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i dodatna školarina za engleski i matematiku
04:27
was budgeted for
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bila je izdvajana
04:29
regardless of what missed out,
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usprkos tome što nam je svašta nedostajalo,
04:32
which was usually new clothes;
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poput nove odjeće;
04:34
they were always secondhand.
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uvijek je bila već nošena.
04:36
Two pairs of stockings for school,
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Dva para čarapa za školu,
04:39
each to hide the holes in the other.
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svaki kako bi sakrio rupe na drugoj.
04:41
A school uniform down to the ankles,
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Školska uniforma do gležnjeva
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because it had to last for six years.
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zato što je morala trajati šest godina.
04:47
And there were rare but searing chants
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I postojali su rijetki, ali ružni napjevi
04:49
of "slit-eye"
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o „kosookima“
04:51
and the occasional graffiti:
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i povremeni grafiti:
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"Asian, go home."
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„Azijci, idite kući.“
04:55
Go home to where?
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Kojoj kući?
04:57
Something stiffened inside me.
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Unutar mene nešto se ukočilo.
05:00
There was a gathering of resolve
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Oblikovala se odlučnost
05:02
and a quiet voice saying, "I will bypass you."
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i tihi glas koji je govorio: „Zaobići ću vas.“
05:06
My mother, my sister and I
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Moja majka, moja sestra i ja
05:08
slept in the same bed.
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spavale smo u istom krevetu.
05:11
My mother was exhausted each night,
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Majka je svake večeri bila iscrpljena,
05:13
but we told one another about our day
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ali smo uvijek jedna drugoj govorile kako nam je prošao dan
05:15
and listened to the movements
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i slušale kako baka
05:17
of my grandmother around the house.
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hoda po kući.
05:19
My mother suffered from nightmares
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Moja je majka imala noćne more
05:21
all about the boat.
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koje su bile vezane uz brodić,
05:24
And my job was to stay awake until her nightmares came
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a moj je posao bio da ostanem budna kada joj dođu te noćne more
05:27
so I could wake her.
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kako bih je mogla probuditi.
05:30
She opened a computer store
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Otvorila je dućan s računalima,
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then studied to be a beautician
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a nakon toga školovala se kako bi bila kozmetičarka
05:34
and opened another business.
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i otvorila još jedan posao.
05:36
And the women came with their stories
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Žene su dolazile sa svojim pričama
05:38
about men who could not make the transition,
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o muškarcima koji nisu mogli prijeći ovamo,
05:40
angry and inflexible,
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bile su ljute i nepopustljive
05:42
and troubled children caught between two worlds.
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i imale problematičnu djecu koja su bila zarobljena između dva svijeta.
05:45
Grants and sponsors were sought.
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Tražile su se stipendije i sponzori.
05:48
Centers were established.
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Osnovani su centri.
05:50
I lived in parallel worlds.
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Živjela sam u paralelnim svjetovima.
05:52
In one, I was the classic Asian student,
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U jednom, bila sam tipičan azijski student,
05:56
relentless in the demands that I made on myself.
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nemilosrdna prema zahtjevima koje sam si postavila.
05:59
In the other, I was enmeshed in lives that were precarious,
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U drugom sam bila upletena u živote koji su bili neizvjesni,
06:02
tragically scarred by violence,
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tragično obilježeni nasiljem,
06:04
drug abuse and isolation.
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drogom i izolacijom.
06:07
But so many over the years were helped.
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A tijekom godina mnogima smo pomagali.
06:09
And for that work, when I was a final year law student,
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I za taj sam posao na zadnjoj godini pravnog studija bila
06:12
I was chosen as the young Australian of the year.
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izabrana za mladu Australku godine.
06:15
And I was catapulted
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I bila sam katapultirana
06:17
from one piece of the jigsaw to another,
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s jednog dijela slagalice na drugi,
06:19
and their edges didn't fit.
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a njihovi se rubovi nisu slagali.
06:21
Tan Le, anonymous Footscray resident,
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Anonimna Tan Le iz Footscraya
06:23
was now Tan Le, refugee and social activist,
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sada je bila Tan Le, izbjeglica i socijalna aktivistica
06:27
invited to speak in venues she had never heard of
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koja je bila pozvana da govori na mjestima za koje nikada nije čula
06:30
and into homes whose existence
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i u domove
06:32
she could never have imagined.
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koje nije mogla ni zamisliti.
06:34
I didn't know the protocols.
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Nisam poznavala protokol.
06:36
I didn't know how to use the cutlery.
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Nisam znala kako koristiti pribor za jelo.
06:39
I didn't know how to talk about wine.
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Nisam znala kako govoriti o vinu.
06:42
I didn't know how to talk about anything.
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Nisam znala kako govoriti ni o čemu.
06:46
I wanted to retreat to the routines and comfort
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Željela sam odstupiti od rutine i udobnosti
06:49
of life in an unsung suburb --
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života u neopjevanom predgrađu –
06:52
a grandmother, a mother and two daughters
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baka, majka i dvije kćeri
06:55
ending each day as they had for almost 20 years,
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završavaju svoj dan jednako kao što to rade već 20 godina,
06:58
telling one another the story of their day
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pričajući jedna drugoj kako je prošao dan,
07:00
and falling asleep,
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i sve tri još uvijek
07:02
the three of us still in the same bed.
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spavaju u istom krevetu.
07:06
I told my mother I couldn't do it.
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Rekla sam majci da ja to ne mogu.
07:10
She reminded me that I was now the same age she had been
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Podsjetila me je da mi je isto godina kao njoj
07:13
when we boarded the boat.
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kad smo se ukrcale na brod.
07:16
No had never been an option.
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Riječ "ne" nikad nije bila opcija.
07:19
"Just do it," she said,
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„Učini to“, rekla je,
07:21
"and don't be what you're not."
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„i nemoj biti nešto što nisi.“
07:24
So I spoke out on youth unemployment and education
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Govorila sam o nezaposlenosti mladih i obrazovanju
07:27
and the neglect of the marginalized and the disenfranchised.
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i zanemarivanju marginaliziranih i obespravljenih.
07:30
And the more candidly I spoke,
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I što sam iskrenije govorila,
07:32
the more I was asked to speak.
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tražili su da govorim još više.
07:35
I met people from all walks of life,
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Upoznala sam ljude različitih životnih puteva,
07:38
so many of them doing the thing they loved,
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i mnogi od njih radili su ono što vole,
07:40
living on the frontiers of possibility.
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živeći na granicama mogućnosti.
07:43
And even though I finished my degree,
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Iako sam bila diplomirala, shvatila sam
07:46
I realized I could not settle into a career in law.
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da mi pravnička karijera nije dovoljna.
07:49
There had to be another piece of the jigsaw.
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Tu je morao biti još jedan dio slagalice.
07:52
And I realized at the same time
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I u isto sam vrijeme shvatila
07:55
that it is okay to be an outsider,
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da je u redu da budeš autsajder,
07:57
a recent arrival,
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novopridošlica,
07:59
new on the scene --
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novi na sceni –
08:01
and not just okay,
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i ne samo da je u redu,
08:03
but something to be thankful for,
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već za to treba biti zahvalan,
08:05
perhaps a gift from the boat.
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možda je to dar s brodića.
08:08
Because being an insider
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Zato što biti insider
08:10
can so easily mean collapsing the horizons,
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lako može značiti sužavanje horizonta
08:12
can so easily mean
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i lako može značiti
08:14
accepting the presumptions of your province.
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prihvaćanje predrasuda vlastitog zavičaja.
08:17
I have stepped outside my comfort zone enough now
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Sada sam već dovoljno zakoračila van svoje sigurne okoline
08:20
to know that, yes, the world does fall apart,
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da znam da se svijet raspada,
08:22
but not in the way that you fear.
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ali ne na način kojeg se bojite.
08:25
Possibilities that would not have been allowed
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Mogućnosti koje ne bi bile dozvoljene,
08:27
were outrageously encouraged.
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drsko su poticane.
08:29
There was an energy there,
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Tu je bila energija,
08:31
an implacable optimism,
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neumoljivi optimizam,
08:33
a strange mixture of humility and daring.
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čudna mješavina poniznosti i odvažnosti.
08:36
So I followed my hunches.
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Pa sam slijedila svoju intuiciju i
08:38
I gathered around me a small team of people
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okupila oko sebe malu ekipu ljudi
08:41
for whom the label "It can't be done"
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za koju je termin „To se ne može učiniti“
08:43
was an irresistible challenge.
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bio neodoljiv izazov.
08:46
For a year we were penniless.
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Godinu smo dana bili bez novaca.
08:48
At the end of each day, I made a huge pot of soup
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Na kraju svakog dana kuhala sam ogroman lonac juhe
08:50
which we all shared.
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koji smo svi podijelili.
08:52
We worked well into each night.
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Radili smo do kasno u noć.
08:55
Most of our ideas were crazy,
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Većina je naših ideja bila luda,
08:57
but a few were brilliant,
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ali nekoliko ih je bilo sjajnih
08:59
and we broke through.
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i uspjeli smo se probiti.
09:02
I made the decision to move to the U.S.
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Odlučila sam se preseliti u SAD
09:04
after only one trip.
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nakon samo jednog putovanja.
09:06
My hunches again.
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Opet moj predosjećaj.
09:08
Three months later I had relocated,
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Tri mjeseca kasnije preselila sam se
09:10
and the adventure has continued.
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i avantura se nastavila.
09:13
Before I close though,
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Prije no što završim,
09:15
let me tell you about my grandmother.
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da vam kažem nešto o svojoj baki.
09:18
She grew up at a time
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Odrasla je u vrijeme
09:20
when Confucianism was the social norm
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kada je konfucijanizam bio društvena norma
09:22
and the local Mandarin was the person who mattered.
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i lokalni mandarini su bili osobe koje su nešto značile.
09:25
Life hadn't changed for centuries.
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Život se nije mijenjao stoljećima.
09:28
Her father died soon after she was born.
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Otac joj je umro ubrzo nakon njezina rođenja.
09:32
Her mother raised her alone.
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Majka ju je sama podizala.
09:35
At 17 she became the second wife
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Sa 17 je postala druga žena
09:38
of a Mandarin whose mother beat her.
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mandarina čija ju je majka tukla.
09:41
With no support from her husband,
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Bez potpore svog muža,
09:43
she caused a sensation by taking him to court
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bila je senzacija kada ga je dovela na sud
09:46
and prosecuting her own case,
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i sama vodila slučaj
09:48
and a far greater sensation when she won.
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i još je veća senzacija bila kada je pobijedila.
09:51
(Laughter)
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(smijeh)
09:53
(Applause)
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(pljesak)
09:57
"It can't be done" was shown to be wrong.
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„To se ne može učiniti“ pokazalo se netočnim.
10:03
I was taking a shower in a hotel room in Sydney
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Tuširala sam se u hotelskoj sobi u Sydneyu
10:06
the moment she died
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u trenutku kad je ona umrla
10:08
600 miles away in Melbourne.
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950 km dalje u Melbourneu.
10:11
I looked through the shower screen
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Pogledala sam kroz zastor tuša
10:13
and saw her standing on the other side.
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i vidjela je kako stoji s druge strane.
10:16
I knew she had come to say goodbye.
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Znala sam da se došla oprostiti.
10:18
My mother phoned minutes later.
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Moja me majka nazvala nekoliko minuta kasnije.
10:21
A few days later,
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Nekoliko dana poslije
10:23
we went to a Buddhist temple in Footscray
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otišle smo u budistički hram u Footscrayu
10:25
and sat around her casket.
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i sjele pored njenog lijesa.
10:27
We told her stories
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Pričale smo joj priče
10:29
and assured her that we were still with her.
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i uvjerile ju da smo još uvijek s njom.
10:32
At midnight the monk came
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U ponoć je došao monah
10:35
and told us he had to close the casket.
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i rekao nam da moramo zatvoriti lijes.
10:38
My mother asked us to feel her hand.
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Majka nas je zamolila da joj opipamo ruku.
10:41
She asked the monk,
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Upitala je monaha:
10:43
"Why is it that her hand is so warm
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„Kako to da joj je ruka tako topla,
10:45
and the rest of her is so cold?"
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a sve ostalo hladno?“
10:48
"Because you have been holding it since this morning," he said.
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„Zato što ste je držali od jutra“, rekao je,
10:52
"You have not let it go."
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„niste je pustili.“
10:57
If there is a sinew in our family,
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Ako postoji snaga u našoj obitelji,
10:59
it runs through the women.
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ona ide kroz žene.
11:01
Given who we were and how life had shaped us,
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S obzirom na to kakve smo bile i kako nas je život oblikovao,
11:04
we can now see
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sada vidimo
11:06
that the men who might have come into our lives
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da bi nas muškarci koji su možda mogli ući u naše živote,
11:08
would have thwarted us.
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omeli na našem putu.
11:10
Defeat would have come too easily.
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Olako bismo prihvatile poraz.
11:13
Now I would like to have my own children,
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Sada bih voljela imati svoju djecu,
11:15
and I wonder about the boat.
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i razmišljam o onom brodu.
11:18
Who could ever wish it on their own?
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Tko bi si to ikada poželio?
11:21
Yet I am afraid of privilege,
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Ipak se bojim privilegije,
11:23
of ease,
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spokoja
11:25
of entitlement.
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i povlastica.
11:27
Can I give them a bow in their lives,
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Mogu li im dati pramac
11:29
dipping bravely into each wave,
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broda koji hrabro uranja u svaki val,
11:32
the unperturbed and steady beat of the engine,
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neometan i stabilan zvuk motora,
11:35
the vast horizon
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širok horizont
11:37
that guarantees nothing?
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koji ništa ne garantira?
11:39
I don't know.
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Ne znam.
11:41
But if I could give it
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Ali ako bih im to mogla dati
11:43
and still see them safely through,
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i da znam da će sigurno prebroditi,
11:45
I would.
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učinila bih to.
11:48
(Applause)
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(pljesak)
12:00
Trevor Neilson: And also, Tan's mother is here today
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Trevor Neilson: S nama je danas i Tanina majka
12:03
in the fourth or fifth row.
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u četvrtom ili petom redu.
12:06
(Applause)
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(pljesak)
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Tan Le - EntrepreneurTan Le is the founder & CEO of Emotiv, a bioinformatics company that's working on identifying biomarkers for mental and other neurological conditions using electroencephalography (EEG).
Why you should listen
Tan Le is the co-founder and president of Emotiv. Before this, she headed a firm that worked on a new form of remote control that uses brainwaves to control digital devices and digital media. It's long been a dream to bypass the mechanical (mouse, keyboard, clicker) and have our digital devices respond directly to what we think. Emotiv's EPOC headset uses 16 sensors to listen to activity across the entire brain. Software "learns" what each user's brain activity looks like when one, for instance, imagines a left turn or a jump.
Le herself has an extraordinary story -- a refugee from Vietnam at age 4, she entered college at 16 and has since become a vital young leader in her home country of Australia.
Tan Le | Speaker | TED.com