TED2006
Helen Fisher: Why we love, why we cheat
Helen Fišer nam govori o tome zašto volimo i varamo
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Antropolog Helena Fišer govori o škakljivoj temi - ljubavi - i objašnjava njenu evoluciju, biohemijske osnove i društveni značaj. Predavanje završava upozorenjem o potencijalnoj katastrofi prouzrokovanoj zloupotrebom antidepresanata.
Helen Fisher - Anthropologist, expert on love
Anthropologist Helen Fisher studies gender differences and the evolution of human emotions. She’s best known as an expert on romantic love. Full bio
Anthropologist Helen Fisher studies gender differences and the evolution of human emotions. She’s best known as an expert on romantic love. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
Želela bih da pričam o dva najveća trenda u nastupajućem veku,
00:25
I'd like to talk today
about the two biggest social trends
about the two biggest social trends
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in the coming century,
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00:31
and perhaps in the next 10,000 years.
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a i možda u narednih 10 000 godina.
Ali bih htela da započnem sa mojim radom o romantičnoj ljubavi,
00:34
But I want to start
with my work on romantic love,
with my work on romantic love,
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00:38
because that's my most recent work.
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jer je to moj najskoriji rad.
Moje kolege i ja smo 32-oje ludo zaljubljenih stavili u
00:41
What I and my colleagues did was put
32 people, who were madly in love,
32 people, who were madly in love,
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00:45
into a functional MRI brain scanner.
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MR skener za mozak.
17 ludo zaljubljenih čija je ljubav prihvaćena,
00:48
17 who were madly in love
and their love was accepted;
and their love was accepted;
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i 15 ludo zaljubljenih koji su bili ostavljeni.
00:51
and 15 who were madly in love
and they had just been dumped.
and they had just been dumped.
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Želela bih prvo o tome da Vam pričam,
00:54
And so I want to tell you
about that first,
about that first,
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pa da pređem na to u kom pravcu mislim da je ljubav krenula.
00:57
and then go on into where
I think love is going.
I think love is going.
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01:01
(Laughter)
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01:03
"What 'tis to love?" Shakespeare said.
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''Šta je to voleti?'', rekao je Šekspir.
Ljudi su sebi postavljali ovo pitanje
01:07
I think our ancestors --
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01:09
I think human beings have been
wondering about this question
wondering about this question
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još dok su sedeli oko vatre ili dok su ležeći gledali zvezde pre milion godina.
01:13
since they sat around their campfires
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01:15
or lay and watched
the stars a million years ago.
the stars a million years ago.
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01:19
I started out by trying to figure out
what romantic love was
what romantic love was
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Rad sam započela pitajući se šta je to romantična ljubav
i pregledajući psihološka istraživanja u poslednjih 45 godina,
01:22
by looking at the last 45 years
of the psychological research
of the psychological research
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01:28
and as it turns out,
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shvatila da postoji posebna grupa stvari koje nam se dešavaju kad se zaljubimo.
01:29
there's a very specific group of things
that happen when you fall in love.
that happen when you fall in love.
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Prva stvar koja se dešava -
01:34
The first thing that happens is,
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01:36
a person begins to take on
what I call, "special meaning."
what I call, "special meaning."
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osoba počinje da dobija ''poseban značaj''.
Kao što mi jednom reče jedan kamiondžija,
01:40
As a truck driver once said to me,
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''Svet je dobio novi centar, i to je bila Meri En.''
01:42
"The world had a new center,
and that center was Mary Anne."
and that center was Mary Anne."
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01:46
George Bernard Shaw said it differently.
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Džordž Bernard Šo je to rekao nešto drugačije.
''Ljubav je precenjivanje razlika između jedne žene i neke druge.''
01:48
"Love consists of overestimating
the differences
the differences
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01:51
between one woman and another."
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I zaista, to je ono što mi radimo.
01:53
And indeed, that's what we do.
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01:55
(Laughter)
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01:58
And then you just focus on this person.
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A onda se usredsredimo na tu osobu.
02:01
You can list what you
don't like about them,
don't like about them,
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Možete da nabrojite šta Vam se ne dopada kod nje,
i onda sve to zanemarite i fokusirate se na ono što Vam se dopada.
02:04
but then you sweep that aside
and focus on what you do.
and focus on what you do.
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02:07
As Chaucer said, "Love is blind."
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Kao što Šauser reče: ''Ljubav je slepa.''
02:11
In trying to understand romantic love,
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Pokušavajući da shvatim romantičnu ljubav,
02:13
I decided I would read poetry
from all over the world,
from all over the world,
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odlučila sam da pročitam poeziju iz celog sveta,
02:16
and I just want to give
you one very short poem
you one very short poem
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i želela bih da Vam pročitam jednu kratku poemu iz Kine iz 8-og veka,
02:19
from eighth-century China,
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jer je to skoro savršen primer čoveka potpuno usredsređenog na jednu ženu.
02:20
because it's an almost perfect example
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02:22
of a man who is focused totally
on a particular woman.
on a particular woman.
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Kada ste ludo zaljubljeni u nekoga
02:26
It's a little bit like when you are
madly in love with somebody
madly in love with somebody
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i kada dođete na parking,
02:29
and you walk into a parking lot --
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za Vas su kola te osobe drugačija od svih ostalih na parkingu.
02:31
their car is different
from every other car in the parking lot.
from every other car in the parking lot.
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Njihova vinska čaša je drugačija od svih ostalih čaša za stolom.
02:34
Their wine glass at dinner
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02:36
is different from every other wine glass
at the dinner party.
at the dinner party.
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02:39
And in this case, a man got hooked
on a bamboo sleeping mat.
on a bamboo sleeping mat.
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U ovoj pesmi, čovek se zaljubio u ležaljku od bambusa.
Pesmu je napisao Juan Čeng i glasi:
02:44
And it goes like this.
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02:45
It's by a guy called Yuan Zhen.
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''Ne mogu da ostavim ležaljku od bambusa.
02:48
"I cannot bear to put away
the bamboo sleeping mat.
the bamboo sleeping mat.
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Noći kad sam te kući doneo, posmatrah kako se prostireš.''
02:51
The night I brought you home,
I watched you roll it out."
I watched you roll it out."
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On se zaljubio u ležaljku,
02:55
He became hooked on a sleeping mat,
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verovatno zbog povišene aktivnosti dopamina u mozgu.
02:57
probably because of elevated activity
of dopamine in his brain,
of dopamine in his brain,
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Kao što se dešava kod svih nas.
03:00
just like with you and me.
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Osoba dobija poseban značaj,
03:02
But anyway, not only does this person
take on special meaning,
take on special meaning,
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usredsređujemo svoju pažnju na nju.
03:05
you focus your attention on them.
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03:07
You aggrandize them.
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Veličamo je. Ali smo i puni energije.
03:09
But you have intense energy.
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Kao što jedan Polinežanin reče: ''Poželeo sam da skočim u nebo.''
03:11
As one Polynesian said,
"I felt like jumping in the sky."
"I felt like jumping in the sky."
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Ne spavamo celu noć. Hodamo sve do zore.
03:15
You're up all night.
You're walking till dawn.
You're walking till dawn.
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Osećamo jak zanos kada sve ide dobro,
03:18
You feel intense elation
when things are going well;
when things are going well;
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i grozan očaj kada loše krene.
03:21
mood swings into horrible despair
when things are going poorly.
when things are going poorly.
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Zaista zavisimo od te osobe.
03:24
Real dependence on this person.
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Jedan biznismen iz Njujorka mi je rekao: ''Sve što je ona volela, i ja sam voleo.''
03:27
As one businessman in New York said to me,
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"Anything she liked, I liked."
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Prosto. Romantična ljubav je vrlo prosta.
03:32
Simple. Romantic love is very simple.
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03:35
You become extremely sexually possessive.
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Postajemo izuzetno seksualno posesivni.
03:37
You know, if you're just sleeping
with somebody casually,
with somebody casually,
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Ako samo spavamo s nekim bez obaveza,
03:40
you don't really care
if they're sleeping with somebody else.
if they're sleeping with somebody else.
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nije nas briga da li ta osoba spava s nekim drugim.
Ali kada se zaljubimo,
03:43
But the moment you fall in love,
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postajemo izuzetno seksualno posesivni.
03:45
you become extremely
sexually possessive of them.
sexually possessive of them.
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Mislim da za to postoji jedan darvinovski razlog.
03:47
I think there's a Darwinian
purpose to this.
purpose to this.
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03:50
The whole point of this
is to pull two people together
is to pull two people together
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Cela svrha ljubavi je ujediniti dve osobe
dovoljno snažno da počnu da prave bebe.
03:53
strongly enough to begin
to rear babies as a team.
to rear babies as a team.
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03:57
But the main characteristics
of romantic love are craving:
of romantic love are craving:
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Glavna odlika romantične ljubavi je žudnja:
04:00
an intense craving
to be with a particular person,
to be with a particular person,
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snažna žudnja da se bude s jednom osobom, ne samo seksualno već i emotivno.
04:04
not just sexually, but emotionally.
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04:06
It would be nice to go to bed with them,
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Bilo bi lepo otići u krevet s njom,
ali takođe želite da Vas zove telefonom, da izlazite, itd.
04:10
but you want them to call you
on the telephone, to invite you out, etc.,
on the telephone, to invite you out, etc.,
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04:14
to tell you that they love you.
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Da Vam kaže da Vas voli.
04:17
The other main characteristic
is motivation.
is motivation.
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Druga glavna odlika je motivacija.
Motor u Vašem mozgu se pali i Vi želite tu osobu.
04:22
The motor in the brain begins to crank,
and you want this person.
and you want this person.
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04:25
And last but not least,
it is an obsession.
it is an obsession.
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I na kraju, to je jedna obsesija.
Pre nego što bih stavila ove ljude u skener,
04:28
Before I put these people
in the MRI machine,
in the MRI machine,
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04:32
I would ask them all kinds of questions.
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postavljala bih im svakakva pitanja.
04:34
But my most important question
was always the same.
was always the same.
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Ali najvažnije pitanje je uvek bilo isto.
''Koliko vremena dnevno mislite na tu osobu?''
04:37
It was: "What percentage of the day
and night do you think about this person?"
and night do you think about this person?"
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I svi bi rekli: ''Celi dan. Celu noć. Ne prestajem da mislim o njemu ili njoj."
04:42
And indeed, they would say,
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"All day. All night.
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I can never stop thinking
about him or her."
about him or her."
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04:49
And then, the very last question --
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I poslednje pitanje koje bih im postavila -
04:51
I would always have to work
myself up to this question,
myself up to this question,
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Uvek bih morala da se pripremim za ovo pitanje,
jer ja nisam psiholog.
04:54
because I'm not a psychologist.
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Ja ne radim sa osobama u bilo kakvoj traumatskoj situaciji.
04:55
I don't work with people
in any kind of traumatic situation.
in any kind of traumatic situation.
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I moje poslednje pitanje je uvek bilo isto.
04:59
My final question was always the same.
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''Da li biste umrli za njega ili nju?''
05:01
I would say,
"Would you die for him or her?"
"Would you die for him or her?"
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I zaista, svi bi rekli: ''Bih!''
05:04
And, indeed, these people would say "Yes!"
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Kao da sam ih pitala da mi dodaju so.
05:06
as if I had asked them to pass the salt.
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Prosto sam bila zapanjena time.
05:08
I was just staggered by it.
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05:12
So we scanned their brains,
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Skenirali smo njihove mozgove dok posmatraju svoju ljubav i neku neutralnu sliku,
05:15
looking at a photograph
of their sweetheart
of their sweetheart
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05:17
and looking at a neutral photograph,
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između čega bi dobili neki zadatak za odvlačenje pažnje.
05:18
with a distraction task in between.
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Posmatrali smo isti mozak kada je bio veoma aktivan
05:20
So we could look at the same brain
when it was in that heightened state
when it was in that heightened state
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05:25
and when it was in a resting state.
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i kada je bio u fazi odmaranja.
I otkrili smo aktivnost u mnogim delovima mozga.
05:28
And we found activity
in a lot of brain regions.
in a lot of brain regions.
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I jedan od najvažnijih je deo
05:30
In fact, one of the most important
was a brain region
was a brain region
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koji se aktivira kada osećate dejstvo kokaina.
05:33
that becomes active
when you feel the rush of cocaine.
when you feel the rush of cocaine.
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Zapravo, to je baš ono što se dešava.
05:37
And indeed, that's exactly what happens.
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05:40
I began to realize that romantic love
is not an emotion.
is not an emotion.
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Shvatila sam da romantična ljubav nije emocija.
Oduvek sam mislila da je ona čitav niz emocija,
05:45
In fact, I had always thought
it was a series of emotions,
it was a series of emotions,
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od veoma snažnih do veoma slabih.
05:47
from very high to very low.
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05:49
But actually, it's a drive.
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Ali to je zapravo nagon. Nastaje radom mozga,
05:51
It comes from the motor of the mind,
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05:53
the wanting part of the mind,
the craving part of the mind.
the craving part of the mind.
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i to onog dela koji je odgovoran za žudnju.
To je onaj deo mozga koji je aktivan
05:57
The kind of part of the mind
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05:58
when you're reaching
for that piece of chocolate,
for that piece of chocolate,
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kada posežete za čokoladom,
kada želite da dobijete unapređenje na poslu.
06:01
when you want to win
that promotion at work.
that promotion at work.
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To je rad mozga. To je nagon.
06:05
The motor of the brain.
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06:07
It's a drive.
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06:08
And in fact, I think it's more powerful
than the sex drive.
than the sex drive.
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I mislim da je moćniji od seksualnog nagona.
Ako pitate nekoga da spava s Vam i oni Vam kažu: ''Ne, hvala.'',
06:11
You know, if you ask somebody
to go to bed with you,
to go to bed with you,
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06:14
and they say, "No, thank you,"
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ne poželite da se ubijete niti padate u depresiju.
06:15
you certainly don't kill yourself
or slip into a clinical depression.
or slip into a clinical depression.
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Ali, širom sveta ljudi koji su odbačeni u ljubavi, će ubiti za nju.
06:19
But certainly, around the world,
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06:22
people who are rejected
in love will kill for it.
in love will kill for it.
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Ljudi žive za ljubav. Ubijaju za ljubav. Umiru za ljubav.
06:27
People live for love.
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06:28
They kill for love.
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06:29
They die for love.
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06:31
They have songs, poems, novels,
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Imamo pesme, poeme, romane, skulpture, slike, mitove, legende.
06:34
sculptures, paintings, myths, legends.
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U preko 175 društava ljudi su ostavili svoj trag ovog moćnog moždanog sistema.
06:38
In over 175 societies,
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people have left their evidence
of this powerful brain system.
of this powerful brain system.
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Čak mislim da je to jedan od najmoćnijih moždanih sistema na svetu
06:45
I have come to think
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it's one of the most powerful
brain systems on Earth
brain systems on Earth
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kako zbog velike radosti tako i zbog velike tuge.
06:49
for both great joy and great sorrow.
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Takođe sam shvatila da je to jedan od tri
06:52
And I've also come to think
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06:53
that it's one of three
basically different brain systems
basically different brain systems
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suštinski različita moždana sistema koji su evoluirali od parenja i razmnožavanja.
06:57
that evolved from mating and reproduction.
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Jedan je seksualni nagon: žudnja za zadovoljenjem seksualnih potreba.
06:59
One is the sex drive:
the craving for sexual gratification.
the craving for sexual gratification.
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07:03
W.H. Auden called it
an "intolerable neural itch,"
an "intolerable neural itch,"
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V. H. Oden je to nazvao ''nesnosivi nervni svrab'',
07:06
and indeed, that's what it is.
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i zapravo, to i jeste baš to.
Malo Vam smeta, kao kad ste gladni.
07:09
It keeps bothering you
a little bit, like being hungry.
a little bit, like being hungry.
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Drugi moždani sistem je romantična ljubav:
07:13
The second of these three brain
systems is romantic love:
systems is romantic love:
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07:16
that elation, obsession of early love.
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zanos i obsesija rane ljubavi.
07:18
And the third brain system is attachment:
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I treći moždani sistem je privrženost:
osećaj smirenosti i sigurnosti koji osećamo prema dugovremenom partneru.
07:21
that sense of calm and security
you can feel for a long-term partner.
you can feel for a long-term partner.
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07:25
And I think that the sex drive
evolved to get you out there,
evolved to get you out there,
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Mislim da je seksualni nagon evoluirao kako bi Vas naterao
da tražite čitav niz partnera.
07:28
looking for a whole range of partners.
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Možete da ga osetite i kada se samo vozite u kolima.
07:30
You can feel it when you're just
driving along in your car.
driving along in your car.
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Ne mora da bude usredsređen na određenu osobu.
07:33
It can be focused on nobody.
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Romantična ljubav je evoluirala kako bi usredsredila energiju za parenje
07:35
I think romantic love evolved
to enable you to focus your mating energy
to enable you to focus your mating energy
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07:38
on just one individual at a time,
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na samo jednu osobu,
07:40
thereby conserving mating time and energy.
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čime se štedi vreme i energija za parenje.
07:43
And I think that attachment,
the third brain system,
the third brain system,
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A treći moždani sistem, privrženost,
je evoluirao kako bi Vam omogućio da trpite to ljudsko biće,
07:46
evolved to enable you to tolerate
this human being
this human being
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07:49
at least long enough to raise
a child together as a team.
a child together as a team.
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bar toliko dugo da zajedno odgajite dete.
07:55
So with that preamble,
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Sada bih želela da prodiskutujem o dva osnovna društvena trenda,
07:57
I want to go into discussing
the two most profound social trends.
the two most profound social trends.
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08:03
One of the last 10,000 years
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od kojih jedan koji postoji već 10 000 godina a drugi poslednjih 25,
08:06
and the other,
certainly of the last 25 years,
certainly of the last 25 years,
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i koji imaju uticaj na ova tri moždana sistema:
08:10
that are going to have an impact
on these three different brain systems:
on these three different brain systems:
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požudu, romantičnu ljubav i duboku privrženost prema partneru.
08:15
lust, romantic love
and deep attachment to a partner.
and deep attachment to a partner.
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Prvi trend je prelazak žena u radnu snagu.
08:19
The first is women working,
moving into the workforce.
moving into the workforce.
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Pregledala sam 130 društava u demografskim knjigama Ujedinjenih Nacija.
08:26
I've looked at 130 societies
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08:29
through the demographic yearbooks
of the United Nations.
of the United Nations.
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U 129 od 130 društava, žene ne samo da ulaze na poslovno tržište -
08:31
Everywhere in the world,
129 out of 130 of them,
129 out of 130 of them,
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08:36
women are not only moving
into the job market --
into the job market --
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08:38
sometimes very, very slowly,
but they are moving into the job market --
but they are moving into the job market --
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nekada veoma sporo ali sigurno ulaze -
08:42
and they are very slowly closing
that gap between men and women
that gap between men and women
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već i polako sužavaju jaz između žena i muškaraca
08:46
in terms of economic power,
health and education.
health and education.
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kada su u pitanju ekonomska moć, bogatstvo i obrazovanje.
To ide vrlo sporo.
08:50
It's very slow.
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08:51
For every trend on this planet,
there's a counter-trend.
there's a counter-trend.
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Na našoj planeti, za svaki trend postoji i kontra-trend.
08:54
We all know of them, but nevertheless --
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Ali ipak, kako kaže stara arapska poslovica:
08:57
the Arabs say, "The dogs may bark,
but the caravan moves on."
but the caravan moves on."
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''Psi mogu da laju, ali karavan ipak ide dalje.''
I zaista, i ovaj karavan ide dalje.
09:03
And, indeed, that caravan is moving on.
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Žene se vraćaju na poslovno tržište.
09:05
Women are moving back into the job market.
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Kažem 'vraćaju se' jer to nije ništa novo.
09:08
And I say back into the job market,
because this is not new.
because this is not new.
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Milionima godina, na zelenim poljima Afrike,
09:12
For millions of years,
on the grasslands of Africa,
on the grasslands of Africa,
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žene su putovale na posao da sakupe povrće.
09:15
women commuted to work
to gather their vegetables.
to gather their vegetables.
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Kući su se vraćale sa 60-80% večere.
09:18
They came home with 60 to 80 percent
of the evening meal.
of the evening meal.
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09:22
The double income family was the standard.
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Porodica sa dvostrukom zaradom je bila standard.
09:25
And women were regarded
as just as economically,
as just as economically,
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Žene i muškarci su bili jednaki u ekonomskom, društvenom i seksualnom pogledu.
09:29
socially and sexually powerful as men.
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09:32
In short, we're really
moving forward to the past.
moving forward to the past.
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Ukratko, mi zapravo idemo napred u prošlost.
Onda, najgori izum žena je bio plug.
09:37
Then, women's worst
invention was the plow.
invention was the plow.
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Od tada su muškarci dobili izuzetno važnu ulogu.
09:42
With the beginning of plow agriculture,
men's roles became extremely powerful.
men's roles became extremely powerful.
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Žene su izgubile svoje stare poslove sakupljača,
09:46
Women lost their ancient
jobs as collectors,
jobs as collectors,
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ali se sa industrijskom i post-industrijskom revolucijom
09:50
but then with the industrial revolution
and the post-industrial revolution
and the post-industrial revolution
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vraćaju na poslovno tržište.
09:54
they're moving back into the job market.
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Ukratko, stiču status koji su imale pre milion godina,
09:56
In short, they are acquiring the status
that they had a million years ago,
that they had a million years ago,
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pre 10 000, 100 000 godina.
10:01
10,000 years ago, 100,000 years ago.
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10:04
We are seeing now one
of the most remarkable traditions
of the most remarkable traditions
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Svedoci smo jedne od naistaknutijih tradicija u istoriji ljudske životinje.
10:09
in the history of the human animal.
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I to će imati uticaja.
10:13
And it's going to have an impact.
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Ja obično držim celo predavanje o uticaju žena na biznis.
10:15
I generally give a whole lecture
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10:16
on the impact of women
on the business community.
on the business community.
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Sada ću reći samo par stvari, pa ću preći na seks i ljubav.
10:18
I'll say just a couple of things,
and then go on to sex and love.
and then go on to sex and love.
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Postoje mnoge razlike među polovima.
10:22
There's a lot of gender differences;
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Svako ko misli da su muškarci i žene slični, nikad nije imao sina i ćerku.
10:23
anybody who thinks men and women are alike
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10:26
simply never had a boy and a girl child.
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Ne znam žašto žele da misle da su muškarci i žene slični.
10:28
I don't know why they want to think
that men and women are alike.
that men and women are alike.
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Puno toga im je zajedničko,
10:31
There's much we have in common,
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10:32
but there's a whole lot
that we do not have in common.
that we do not have in common.
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ali još više toga nije.
10:35
We are -- in the words of Ted Hughes,
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"Mi smo", kao što reče Ted Hjugs,
10:37
"I think that we are like two feet.
We need each other to get ahead."
We need each other to get ahead."
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"stvoreni kao dva stopala. Potrebni smo jedno drugome kako bi išli napred."
Ali nismo evoluirali tako da imamo isti mozak.
10:42
But we did not evolve
to have the same brain.
to have the same brain.
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10:45
And we're finding more and more
gender differences in the brain.
gender differences in the brain.
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I u mozgu otkrivamo sve više i više razlika među polovima.
Navešću samo par i onda preći na seks i ljubav.
10:49
I'll only just use a couple
and then move on to sex and love.
and then move on to sex and love.
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10:52
One of them is women's verbal ability.
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Jedna od njih je verbalna sposobnost žena. Žene umeju da pričaju.
10:54
Women can talk.
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10:55
Women's ability to find the right word
rapidly, basic articulation
rapidly, basic articulation
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Sposobnost žena da brzo nađu pravu reč. Osnovna artikulacija
10:59
goes up in the middle
of the menstrual cycle,
of the menstrual cycle,
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se povećava sredinom menstrualnog ciklusa kada je nivo estrogena najviši.
11:02
when estrogen levels peak.
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Ali čak i za vreme menstruacije, žene su bolje od prosečnog muškarca.
11:03
But even at menstruation,
they're better than the average man.
they're better than the average man.
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Žene umeju da pričaju.
11:07
Women can talk.
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To su radile milionima godina, reči su njihovo oruđe.
11:09
They've been doing it for a million years;
words were women's tools.
words were women's tools.
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11:12
They held that baby
in front of their face,
in front of their face,
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Držale su bebu u naručju,
tepale joj, grdile je i obrazovale rečima.
11:14
cajoling it, reprimanding it,
educating it with words.
educating it with words.
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I zaista, žene postaju veoma moćna sila.
11:18
And, indeed, they're becoming
a very powerful force.
a very powerful force.
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11:21
Even in places like India and Japan,
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Čak i u zemljama kao što su Indija i Japan,
gde žene ne ulaze brzo na regularno poslovno tržište,
11:27
where women are not moving rapidly
into the regular job market,
into the regular job market,
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11:30
they're moving into journalism.
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tamo počinju da se bave novinarstvom.
11:32
And I think that the television
is like the global campfire.
is like the global campfire.
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Ja mislim da je televizija kao globalna logorska vatra.
11:36
We sit around it and it shapes our minds.
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Mi sedimo oko nje i ona nam oblikuje umove.
11:40
Almost always, when I'm on TV,
the producer who calls me,
the producer who calls me,
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Skoro uvek, kada sam na TV-u, producenti koji me pozovu,
koji pregovaraju o tome šta ću da kažem, su žene.
11:44
who negotiates what we're going to say,
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11:47
is a woman.
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Solženjicin je jednom rekao,
11:48
In fact, Solzhenitsyn once said,
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''Imati dobrog pisca je isto što imati još jednu vladu.''
11:50
"To have a great writer
is to have another government."
is to have another government."
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54% pisaca u Americi su danas žene.
11:54
Today 54 percent of people
who are writers in America are women.
who are writers in America are women.
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To je jedna od mnogih odlika žena
11:59
It's one of many,
many characteristics that women have
many characteristics that women have
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koje će one uneti u poslovno tržište.
12:02
that they will bring into the job market.
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One poseduju izvanredne pregovaračke sposobnosti.
12:04
They've got incredible people skills,
negotiating skills.
negotiating skills.
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Veoma su maštovite.
12:09
They're highly imaginative.
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12:10
We now know the brain circuitry
of imagination, of long-term planning.
of imagination, of long-term planning.
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Sada nam je poznato moždano kolo imaginacije i dugoročnog planiranja.
Žene su često mrežni mislioci.
12:15
They tend to be web thinkers.
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12:17
Because the female parts
of the brain are better connected,
of the brain are better connected,
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Delovi mozga su kod žena bolje povezani,
te one često kada misle mogu da povežu više podataka,
12:20
they tend to collect more
pieces of data when they think,
pieces of data when they think,
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da ih postave u složenije obrasce, da vide više mogućnosti i rezultata.
12:23
put them into more complex patterns,
see more options and outcomes.
see more options and outcomes.
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Žene su kontekstualni, holistički ili kako ja to zovem mrežni mislioci.
12:28
They tend to be contextual,
holistic thinkers,
holistic thinkers,
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12:32
what I call web thinkers.
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12:33
Men tend to -- and these are averages --
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2005
Muškarci u proseku teže da se otarase svega nebitnog,
12:35
tend to get rid of what they regard
as extraneous,
as extraneous,
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fokusitaju se na radnju i kreću se po obrascu korak-po-korak.
12:38
focus on what they do,
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12:39
and move in a more
step-by-step thinking pattern.
step-by-step thinking pattern.
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Oba ova načina razmišljanja su savršeno dobra.
12:45
They're both perfectly good
ways of thinking.
ways of thinking.
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I oba su nam potrebna da dalje napredujemo.
12:48
We need both of them to get ahead.
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12:50
In fact, there's many more
male geniuses in the world.
male geniuses in the world.
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Zapravo, mnogo je više muškaraca genija na svetu.
12:53
And there's also many more
male idiots in the world.
male idiots in the world.
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I takođe je mnogo više muškaraca idiota na svetu.
12:56
(Laughter)
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Kada muški mozak funkcioniše dobro, onda funkcioniše izuzetno dobro.
12:58
When the male brain works well,
it works extremely well.
it works extremely well.
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Ja mislim da se mi krećemo ka kolaborativnom društvu,
13:01
And what I really think
that we're doing is,
that we're doing is,
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13:04
we're moving towards
a collaborative society,
a collaborative society,
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društvu u kome su talenti i muškaraca i žena shvaćeni,
13:07
a society in which the talents
of both men and women
of both men and women
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13:09
are becoming understood
and valued and employed.
and valued and employed.
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cenjeni i upotrebljeni.
13:13
But in fact, women moving
into the job market
into the job market
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2763
Ali, ulazak žena na poslovno tržište utiče
13:16
is having a huge impact
on sex and romance and family life.
on sex and romance and family life.
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na seks, romansu i porodični život.
Pre svega, žene počinju da izražavaju svoju seksualnost.
13:22
Foremost, women are starting
to express their sexuality.
to express their sexuality.
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13:27
I'm always astonished
when people come to me and say,
when people come to me and say,
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Zapanjena sam kada me ljudi pozovu i pitaju:
''Zašto muškarci toliko varaju?''
13:30
"Why is it that men are so adulterous?"
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A ja kažem: ''Zašto mislite da muškarci više varaju nego žene?''
13:32
"Why do you think
more men are adulterous than women?"
more men are adulterous than women?"
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2713
''Pa... muškarci više varaju!"
13:35
"Well, men are more adulterous!"
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A ja pitam: "Šta mislite s kim ti muškarci spavaju?"
13:36
And I say, "Who do you think
these men are sleeping with?"
these men are sleeping with?"
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I - prosta matematika!
13:39
(Laughter)
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13:41
And -- basic math!
264
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U svakom slučaju...
13:42
Anyway.
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Na zapadu, devojčice...
13:44
In the Western world,
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13:47
women start sooner at sex,
have more partners,
have more partners,
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Žene ranije stupaju u seksualne odnose, imaju više partnera,
13:50
express less remorse
for the partners that they do,
for the partners that they do,
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manje osećaju krivicu zbog partnera,
13:53
marry later, have fewer children,
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udaju se kasnije, imaju manje dece, napuštaju loše brakove zarad boljih.
13:56
leave bad marriages
in order to get good ones.
in order to get good ones.
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13:59
We are seeing the rise
of female sexual expression.
of female sexual expression.
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3979
Svedoci smo uspona seksualnog izražavanja žena.
I ponovo se krećemo ka seksualnom izražavanju
14:03
And, indeed, once again we're moving
forward to the kind of sexual expression
forward to the kind of sexual expression
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koje je verovatno postojalo na pašnjacima Afrike pre milion godina,
14:08
that we probably saw on the grasslands
of Africa a million years ago,
of Africa a million years ago,
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3684
14:11
because this is the kind
of sexual expression that we see
of sexual expression that we see
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jer to je seksualno izražavanje koje možemo da
14:14
in hunting and gathering societies today.
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vidimo u lovačkim i sakupljačkim društvima danas.
14:17
We're also returning
to an ancient form of marriage equality.
to an ancient form of marriage equality.
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Takođe se vraćamo na drevni oblik bračne jednakosti.
Priča se da će 21. vek
14:22
They're now saying that the 21st century
277
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4556
14:26
is going to be the century of what
they call the "symmetrical marriage,"
they call the "symmetrical marriage,"
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3976
biti vek "simetričnog braka".
14:30
or the "pure marriage,"
or the "companionate marriage."
or the "companionate marriage."
279
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Vek "drugarskog braka".
To je brak jednakih.
14:36
This is a marriage between equals,
280
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3568
14:39
moving forward to a pattern
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Kreće se ka obrascu koji je u skladu sa drevnim ljudskim duhom.
14:42
that is highly compatible
with the ancient human spirit.
with the ancient human spirit.
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3134
14:46
We're also seeing a rise of romantic love.
283
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2539
Takođe smo svedoci uspona romantične ljubavi.
14:49
91 percent of American women
and 86 percent of American men
and 86 percent of American men
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4226
91% Amerikanki i 86% Amerikanaca
se ne bi venčao s nekim ko ima sve kvalitete koje traže u partneru,
14:53
would not marry somebody
who had every single quality
who had every single quality
285
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4603
14:58
they were looking for in a partner,
286
873663
1816
ako nisu zaljubljeni u tu osobu.
15:00
if they were not in love with that person.
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Iz studije o 37 društava, ljudi širom sveta
15:03
People around the world,
in a study of 37 societies,
in a study of 37 societies,
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žele da budu zaljubljeni u osobu s kojom će se uzeti.
15:06
want to be in love
with the person that they marry.
with the person that they marry.
289
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3637
Ugovoreni brakovi će nestati iz ljudskih života.
15:10
Indeed, arranged marriages are
on their way off this braid of human life.
on their way off this braid of human life.
290
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6054
15:20
I even think that marriages
might even become more stable
might even become more stable
291
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2794
Čak mislim da će brakovi postati stabilniji
zbog drugog velikog svetskog trenda.
15:23
because of the second great world trend.
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3754
Prvi trend je ulazak žena na poslovno tržište,
15:27
The first one being women
moving into the job market,
moving into the job market,
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15:29
the second one being
the aging world population.
the aging world population.
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a drugi je svetska populacija koja stari.
15:32
They're now saying that in America,
295
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2427
Danas se u Americi govori da
je srednje doba doba do 85-te godine.
15:35
that middle age should be regarded
as up to age 85.
as up to age 85.
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3651
Jer u navišoj kategoriji, 76-85,
15:39
Because in that highest
age category of 76 to 85,
age category of 76 to 85,
297
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4879
čak 40% ljudi ne fali ništa.
15:44
as much as 40 percent of people
have nothing really wrong with them.
have nothing really wrong with them.
298
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3431
15:47
So we're seeing there's a real
extension of middle age.
extension of middle age.
299
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3382
Tako da vidimo pravo produženje srednjeg doba.
15:51
For one of my books,
I looked at divorce data in 58 societies.
I looked at divorce data in 58 societies.
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5262
Za jednu od mojih knjiga sam pregledala podatke o razvodu u 58 društava.
15:56
And as it turns out, the older you get,
the less likely you are to divorce.
the less likely you are to divorce.
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Pokazalo se da, što su ljudi stariji, to se ređe razvode.
U Americi je stopa razvoda sada stabilna,
16:01
So the divorce rate right now
is stable in America,
is stable in America,
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3601
i čak počinje da opada.
16:05
and it's actually beginning to decline.
303
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16:07
It may decline some more.
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1602
Možda će opasti i još više.
Čak bih rekla da sa vijagrom, zamenama za estrogen, za kukove,
16:11
I would even say that with Viagra,
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16:15
estrogen replacement, hip replacements
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i neverovatno interesantnim ženama...
16:19
and the incredibly interesting women
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954995
1981
16:21
-- women have never been
as interesting as they are now.
as interesting as they are now.
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Žene nikad nisu bile tako interesantne kao danas.
Nikada na ovom svetu nisu bile tako obrazovane, interesantne, tako sposobne.
16:24
Not at any time on this planet
have women been so educated,
have women been so educated,
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3458
16:28
so interesting, so capable.
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1947
I iskreno mislim da, ako je ikada postojao trenutak u evoluciji
16:30
And so I honestly think that if there
really was ever a time in human evolution
really was ever a time in human evolution
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5379
kada imamo priliku za dobre brakove, to je sada.
16:36
when we have the opportunity to make
good marriages, that time is now.
good marriages, that time is now.
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16:41
However, there's always kinds
of complications in this.
of complications in this.
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Mada, tu se uvek nađu komplikacije.
Ova tri moždana sistema: požuda, romantična ljubav i privrženost,
16:44
These three brain systems
-- lust, romantic love and attachment --
-- lust, romantic love and attachment --
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ne idu uvek zajedno.
16:49
don't always go together.
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Oni mogu da idu zajedno.
16:50
They can go together, by the way.
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1699
Zato seks bez obaveza nije baš takav.
16:52
That's why casual sex isn't so casual.
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987583
1952
Sa orgazmom dobijate i mericu dopamina.
16:54
With orgasm you get a spike of dopamine.
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2269
Dopamin je povezan sa romantičnom ljubavi,
16:56
Dopamine's associated with romantic love,
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pa možete da se zaljubite u nekoga s kim samo povremeno spavate.
16:58
and you can just
fall in love with somebody
fall in love with somebody
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2023
17:00
who you're just having casual sex with.
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1863
Sa orgazmom dobijate i priliv oksitocina i vazopresina
17:02
With orgasm, then you get a real rush
of oxytocin and vasopressin --
of oxytocin and vasopressin --
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3436
koji su povezani sa privrženošću.
17:06
those are associated with attachment.
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2031
Zato možete da osećate to kosmičko jedinstvo s nekim
17:08
This is why you can feel such a sense
of cosmic union with somebody
of cosmic union with somebody
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3959
nakon što ste vodili ljubav.
17:12
after you've made love to them.
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1849
Ali ova tri moždana sistema: požuda, romantična ljubav i privrženost,
17:14
But these three brain systems:
lust, romantic love and attachment,
lust, romantic love and attachment,
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1009277
4699
17:18
aren't always connected to each other.
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2481
nisu uvek međusobno povezana.
17:21
You can feel deep attachment
to a long-term partner
to a long-term partner
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Možete da osećate duboku privrženost prema dugoročnom partneru
dok ste snažno zaljubljeni u nekog drugoga,
17:25
while you feel intense
romantic love for somebody else,
romantic love for somebody else,
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1020275
4092
i dok ste seksualno privučeni prema nekoj trećoj osobi.
17:29
while you feel the sex drive for people
unrelated to these other partners.
unrelated to these other partners.
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5453
Ukratko, sposobni smo da volimo više osoba u isto vreme.
17:35
In short, we're capable of loving
more than one person at a time.
more than one person at a time.
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5029
Čak, možete da ležite u krevetu
17:40
In fact, you can lie in bed at night
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1035714
1992
i da se prebacujete od dubokih osećanja privrženosti ka jednoj osobi,
17:42
and swing from deep feelings
of attachment for one person
of attachment for one person
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1037730
3246
17:45
to deep feelings
of romantic love for somebody else.
of romantic love for somebody else.
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3432
do dubokih osećanja zaljubljenosti prema nekom drugome.
Kao da Vam se u glavi odigrava sastanak odbora
17:49
It's as if there's a committee meeting
going on in your head
going on in your head
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2881
a Vi pokušavate da odlučite šta da radite.
17:52
as you are trying to decide what to do.
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3127
Iskreno, mislim da smo mi životinja koja nije stvorena da bude srećna.
17:55
So I don't think, honestly,
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17:56
we're an animal
that was built to be happy;
that was built to be happy;
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2015
Već životinja koja je stvorena da se razmnožava.
17:59
we are an animal
that was built to reproduce.
that was built to reproduce.
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2268
A sreću sami pronalazimo i stvaramo.
18:01
I think the happiness we find, we make.
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2935
18:04
And I think, however,
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3482
Ipak, mislim da možemo da imamo dobre međuljudske odnose.
18:07
we can make good relationships
with each other.
with each other.
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2667
18:10
So I want to conclude with two things.
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Želela bih da zaključim sa dve stvari.
Želela bih da zaključim sa brigom.
18:12
I want to conclude with a worry,
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1068129
2047
Imam jednu brigu - i jednu divnu priču.
18:15
and with a wonderful story.
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2929
Brinu me antidepresivi.
18:19
The worry is about antidepressants.
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1074287
2689
Preko 100 miliona recepata za antidepresive se izda svake godine u USA.
18:23
Over 100 million prescriptions
of antidepressants
of antidepressants
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1078631
5132
18:28
are written every year
in the United States.
in the United States.
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1083787
2821
I upotreba ovih lekova se širi.
18:31
And these drugs are going generic.
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1087100
2565
18:34
They are seeping around the world.
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1089689
2483
Širom sveta.
Znam jednu devojčicu koja je na antidepresivima
18:37
I know one girl who's been
on these antidepressants,
on these antidepressants,
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1092743
5233
18:42
SSRIs, serotonin-enhancing
antidepressants -- since she was 13.
antidepressants -- since she was 13.
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1098000
3976
za povećanje nivoa serotonina, od 13-te godine.
18:46
She's 23. She's been on them
ever since she was 13.
ever since she was 13.
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1102000
2976
Sada ima 23. Koristi ih od 13-te godine.
18:49
I've got nothing against people
who take them short term,
who take them short term,
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3516
Nemam ništa protiv ljudi koji ih koriste na kratko,
18:53
when they're going
through something horrible.
through something horrible.
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2223
kada prolaze kroz nešto jako teško.
18:55
They want to commit suicide
or kill somebody else.
or kill somebody else.
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1110787
2355
Kada žele da se ubiju ili možda ubiju negog drugog.
U tom slučaju ih preporučujem.
18:57
I would recommend it.
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1113166
1068
Ali sve više i više ljudi u SAD ih uzima na duži period.
18:59
But more and more people
in the United States
in the United States
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1114258
2459
19:01
are taking them long term.
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1116741
2384
I ovi lekovi povećavaju nivo serotonina.
19:03
And indeed, what these drugs do
is raise levels of serotonin.
is raise levels of serotonin.
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1119149
5365
I sa povećanjem nivoa serotonina se otežava dotok dopamina.
19:09
And by raising levels of serotonin,
you suppress the dopamine circuit.
you suppress the dopamine circuit.
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1124974
4821
19:14
Everybody knows that.
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1129819
1562
Svi to znaju.
19:16
Dopamine is associated with romantic love.
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1131944
2895
Dopamin je povezan sa romantičnom ljubavi.
19:21
Not only do they suppress
the dopamine circuit,
the dopamine circuit,
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1136627
3150
Ne samo da se otežava priliv dopamina, već se ubija seksualni nagon.
19:24
but they kill the sex drive.
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1139801
1867
A kada ubijete seksualni nagon, ubijate i orgazam.
19:27
And when you kill the sex drive,
you kill orgasm.
you kill orgasm.
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1142316
3824
A kada ubijete orgazam, ubijate i protok droga koje su povezane sa privrženošću.
19:30
And when you kill orgasm,
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1146164
1191
19:32
you kill that flood of drugs
associated with attachment.
associated with attachment.
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1147379
3867
Sve ove stvari su povezane u mozgu.
19:36
The things are connected in the brain.
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1151712
2264
19:38
And when you tamper with one brain system,
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1154000
2656
I kada se igrate jednim moždanim sistemom,
to će imati uticaja i na ostale.
19:41
you're going to tamper with another.
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1156680
1945
19:43
I'm just simply saying that a world
without love is a deadly place.
without love is a deadly place.
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1159000
4754
Jednostavno kažem da je svet bez ljubavi grozno mesto.
19:49
So now --
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1164738
1002
Sada... Hvala.
19:50
(Applause)
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1165764
4212
19:54
Thank you.
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1703
Želela bih da završim jednom pričom. I nakon toga - komentar.
19:56
I want to end with a story.
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1485
19:58
And then, just a comment.
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1173839
1300
Seks i romantičnu ljubav proučavam 30 godina.
20:01
I've been studying romantic love
and sex and attachment for 30 years.
and sex and attachment for 30 years.
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1176741
4779
Ja sam blizanac, interesuje me zašto smo svi mi slični.
20:08
I'm an identical twin;
I am interested in why we're all alike.
I am interested in why we're all alike.
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1183774
3516
Zašto smo Vi i ja slični, zašto su Iračani i Japanci
20:12
Why you and I are alike,
why the Iraqis and the Japanese
why the Iraqis and the Japanese
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1187925
3051
20:15
and the Australian Aborigines
and the people of the Amazon River
and the people of the Amazon River
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1191000
3000
i australijski Aboridžini i ljudi sa Amazona svi slični.
20:18
are all alike.
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1194024
1000
20:20
And about a year ago,
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1195777
2309
Pre godinu dana služba za sparivanje na internetu, Match.com,
20:22
an Internet dating service,
Match.com, came to me
Match.com, came to me
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1198110
2985
me je pitala da dizajniram novi sajt za njih.
20:25
and asked me if I would design
a new dating site for them.
a new dating site for them.
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1201119
3652
20:29
I said, "I don't know anything
about personality. You know?
about personality. You know?
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2802
Rekla sam im: "Ja ne znam ništa o ljudskim karakterima.
20:32
I don't know. Do you think
you've got the right person?"
you've got the right person?"
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1207621
2720
Mislite li sam ja prava osoba za to?"
Rekli su: "Jesi."
20:35
They said, "Yes."
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1210365
1040
Navelo me je da razmislim o tome zašto se zaljubljujemo baš u te određene ljude.
20:36
It got me thinking
about why it is that you fall in love
about why it is that you fall in love
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1211429
3023
20:39
with one person rather than another.
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1214476
1732
To je moj trenutni projekat i biće moja sledeća knjiga.
20:41
That's my current project;
it will be my next book.
it will be my next book.
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1216232
3443
Mnogo je razloga zašto se zaljubljujemo baš u neku određenu osobu.
20:45
There's all kinds of reasons
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1220262
1539
20:46
that you fall in love
with one person rather than another.
with one person rather than another.
393
1221825
2753
Vreme je bitno. Blizina je bitna.
20:49
Timing is important.
Proximity is important.
Proximity is important.
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1224602
3286
Misterija je bitna. Zaljubljujemo se u ljude koji su nekako misteriozni,
20:52
Mystery is important.
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1227912
1380
20:54
You fall in love with somebody
who's somewhat mysterious,
who's somewhat mysterious,
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1229316
2729
delom zbog toga što misterija povećava nivo dopamina u mozgu,
20:56
in part because mystery
elevates dopamine in the brain,
elevates dopamine in the brain,
397
1232069
2678
i verovatno nas tera da se zaljubimo.
20:59
probably pushes you
over that threshold to fall in love.
over that threshold to fall in love.
398
1234771
2766
Zaljubljujemo se u osobe koje se uklapaju u našu "ljubavnu mapu",
21:02
You fall in love with somebody
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1237561
1429
21:03
who fits within
what I call your "love map,"
what I call your "love map,"
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2095
nesvesnu listu odlika koje gradimo tokom detinjstva i odrastanja.
21:05
an unconscious list of traits
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1241133
2147
21:08
that you build in childhood
as you grow up.
as you grow up.
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1243304
2314
Takođe mislim da
21:10
And I also think
that you gravitate to certain people,
that you gravitate to certain people,
403
1245642
3042
nas privlače izvesne osobe, sa komplementarnim moždanim sistemima.
21:13
actually, with somewhat
complementary brain systems.
complementary brain systems.
404
1248708
3268
21:16
And that's what I'm now
contributing to this.
contributing to this.
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1252000
2287
To je moj doprinos ovome.
Želela bih da Vam ispričam priču - ilustracije radi.
21:19
But I want to tell you
a story, to illustrate.
a story, to illustrate.
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3665
21:22
I've been carrying on here
about the biology of love.
about the biology of love.
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1258000
2976
Pričala sam ovde o biologiji ljubavi.
Takođe bih želela da Vam pokažem nešto i o njenoj kulturi,
21:26
I wanted to show you a little bit
about the culture of it, too,
about the culture of it, too,
408
1261709
3687
o njenoj magiji.
21:30
the magic of it.
409
1265420
1167
21:32
It's a story that was told to me
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1268000
3349
Ovu priču mi je ispričao neko ko ju je čuo opet od nekog drugog...
21:36
by somebody who had
heard it just from one --
heard it just from one --
411
1271373
2461
Verovatno je istinita priča.
21:38
probably a true story.
412
1273858
1118
Priča o studentu... Ja radim na Rutgersu a moje kolege
21:41
It was a graduate student --
I'm at Rutgers and my two colleagues --
I'm at Rutgers and my two colleagues --
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1276508
3468
21:44
Art Aron is at SUNY Stony Brook.
414
1280000
1976
Art Aron radi na Sani Stoni Bruku.
21:46
That's where we put our people
in the MRI machine.
in the MRI machine.
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1282000
2371
Tamo ljude stavljamo u moždani skener.
21:49
And this graduate student was madly
in love with another graduate student,
in love with another graduate student,
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1285000
4563
Ovaj student je bio ludo zaljubljen u jednu studentkinju,
koja nije bila zaljubljena u njega.
21:54
and she was not in love with him.
417
1289587
2373
Jednom su bili zajedno na konferenciji u Pekingu.
21:58
And they were
all at a conference in Beijing.
all at a conference in Beijing.
418
1293206
2255
On je iz našeg rada znao da ako s nekim uradiš nešto skroz novo,
22:01
And he knew from our work
419
1296485
3034
22:04
that if you go and do something
very novel with somebody,
very novel with somebody,
420
1299543
4408
možeš da povećaš nivo dopamina u mozgu.
22:08
you can drive up
the dopamine in the brain,
the dopamine in the brain,
421
1303975
2001
22:10
and perhaps trigger this brain
system for romantic love.
system for romantic love.
422
1306000
3693
I možda aktiviraš moždani sistem za romantičnu ljubav.
22:14
(Laughter)
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2157
Odlučio je da nauku sprovede u delo,
22:16
So he decided he'd put science to work.
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1311898
3886
pa ju je pozvao da ide na vožnju rikšom s njim.
22:21
And he invited this girl to go off
on a rickshaw ride with him.
on a rickshaw ride with him.
425
1316624
3334
22:25
And sure enough -- I've never been in one,
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1320809
2069
Ja se nikad nisam vozila u rikši,
22:27
but apparently they go
all around the buses and the trucks
all around the buses and the trucks
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1322902
2738
ali pretpostavljam da su išli po celom gradu pored buseva i kamiona,
i sigurno da je bilo ludo, bučno i uzbudljivo.
22:30
and it's crazy and it's noisy
and it's exciting.
and it's exciting.
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1325664
2818
On je mislio da će to da aktivira dopamin,
22:33
He figured that this would drive up
the dopamine,
the dopamine,
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1328506
2286
i da će se ona zaljubiti u njega.
22:35
and she'd fall in love with him.
430
1330816
1532
I krenuli su, ona vrišti i pribija se uz njega.
22:37
So off they go and she's squealing
and squeezing him
and squeezing him
431
1332372
4974
Smeju se i odlično se provode.
22:42
and laughing and having a wonderful time.
432
1337370
2517
22:44
An hour later they get down
off of the rickshaw,
off of the rickshaw,
433
1339911
3539
Nakom sat vremena silaze sa rikše,
22:48
and she throws her hands up and she says,
434
1343474
3580
ona širi ruke i kaže: "Nije li ovo bilo divno?"
22:51
"Wasn't that wonderful?"
435
1347078
2312
"I kako je zgodan onaj vozač rikše!"
22:54
And, "Wasn't that rickshaw
driver handsome!"
driver handsome!"
436
1349414
3414
22:57
(Laughter)
437
1352852
3069
(Smeh) (Aplauz)
23:00
(Applause)
438
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6031
23:06
There's magic to love!
439
1362000
1162
Ljubav je magična!
23:07
(Applause)
440
1363186
1611
Na kraju ću reći da su nam pre milion godina evoluirala tri osnovna nagona:
23:09
But I will end by saying
that millions of years ago,
that millions of years ago,
441
1364821
3620
23:13
we evolved three basic drives:
442
1368465
2332
seksualni, nagon za romantičnom ljubavi i privrženošću prema dugoročnom partneru.
23:15
the sex drive, romantic love
443
1370821
2519
23:18
and attachment to a long-term partner.
444
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2340
Ovi sistemi su usađeni duboko u ljudskom mozgu.
23:20
These circuits are deeply
embedded in the human brain.
embedded in the human brain.
445
1375728
3079
Opstaće onoliko dugo koliko naša vrsta opstane
23:24
They're going to survive
as long as our species survives
as long as our species survives
446
1379203
4403
u onom što je Šekspir nazvao "ovaj smrtni kotur".
23:28
on what Shakespeare called
"this mortal coil."
"this mortal coil."
447
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2708
Hvala Vam.
23:31
Thank you.
448
1386362
1006
23:32
Chris Anderson: Helen Fisher!
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23:33
(Applause)
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1063
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Helen Fisher - Anthropologist, expert on loveAnthropologist Helen Fisher studies gender differences and the evolution of human emotions. She’s best known as an expert on romantic love.
Why you should listen
Fisher's several books lay bare the mysteries of our most treasured emotion: its evolution, its biochemical foundations and its vital importance to human society. Fisher describes love as a universal human drive (stronger than the sex drive; stronger than thirst or hunger; stronger perhaps than the will to live), and her many areas of inquiry shed light on timeless human mysteries like why we choose one partner over another. Her classic study, Anatomy of Love, first published in 1992, has just been re-issued in a fully updated edition, including her recent neuroimaging research on lust, romantic love and attachment as well as discussions of sexting, hooking up, friends with benefits, other contemporary trends in courtship and marriage, and a dramatic current trend she calls “slow love.”
Helen Fisher | Speaker | TED.com