Sue Klebold: My son was a Columbine shooter. This is my story
Sue Klebold: Mi hijo era un tiroteador en Columbine y esta es mi historia
Sue Klebold has become a passionate agent working to advance mental health awareness and intervention. Full bio
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at Columbine High School,
en la escuela secundaria Columbine,
y a un profesor
before taking their own lives.
antes de quitarse la vida.
in a state of grief and trauma.
en estado de dolor y trauma.
and permanent disability.
y discapacidad permanente.
of deaths and injuries that took place.
de muertes y heridas ocurridas.
the psychological damage
el daño psicológico
in rescue or cleanup efforts.
de rescate o limpieza.
the magnitude of a tragedy like Columbine,
de una tragedia como la de Columbine,
to commit atrocities of their own.
cometiendo sus propias atrocidades.
for the community and for society
la comunidad y la sociedad
to try to accept my son's legacy.
el legado de mi hijo.
that defined the end of his life
que marcó el fin de su vida
different person from the one I knew.
diferente de la que yo conocía.
I thought of myself as a good mom.
me consideraba una buena mamá.
that I failed as a parent,
de que fracasé como madre,
that brings me here today.
me trae aquí hoy.
who knew and loved Dylan the most.
más conocía y amaba a Dylan.
what was happening,
qué estaba pasando,
of someone who kills and hurts.
de alguien que mata e hiere.
I combed through memories,
repasé recuerdos,
exactly where I failed as a parent.
dónde fallé como madre.
who didn't know me before the shootings,
no me conocían antes de la matanza,
en una sala como esta,
has experienced loss
caused by a member of my family
reconocer el sufrimiento
por su cuenta.
and even compassion
e incluso compasión
my son's death as a suicide.
de mi hijo como suicida.
so he could end his life.
para poder terminar con su vida.
until months after his death.
hasta meses después de su muerte.
he showed at the end of his life.
que mostró al final de su vida.
and talking with experts,
y hablar con expertos,
was rooted not in his desire to kill
no radicó en su deseo de matar
when I talk about my son's murder-suicide
del asesinato-suicidio de mi hijo
because it's more concrete.
porque es algo más concreto.
I'm talking about violence.
hablo de violencia.
is to contribute to the misunderstanding
contribuir al malentendido
a la enfermedad mental.
who have a mental illness
de los enfermos mentales
to maybe more than 90 percent
mental health condition of some kind.
mental de algún tipo.
is not equipped to help everyone,
no está equipado para ayudar a todos,
pensamientos destructivos
only if they reach a behavioral crisis.
solo si llegan a una crisis de conducta.
to two percent of all suicides
as they are rising for some populations,
como aumenta en algunas poblaciones,
will rise as well.
aumentará también.
in Dylan's mind prior to his death,
en la mente de Dylan antes de su muerte,
from other survivors of suicide loss.
supervivientes de pérdida por suicidio.
to help with fund-raising events,
a eventos de recaudación de fondos,
survived their own suicidal crisis
de crisis de suicidio
conversations I had
más útiles que tuve
that Dylan could not have loved me
Dylan no me amaba
as horrible as he did.
como lo que hizo.
that conversation,
la conversación,
a young, single mother
era madre joven soltera
and was hospitalized to keep her safe.
hospitalizada para mantenerla a salvo.
would be better off if she died,
si ella moría,
terminar con su vida.
was the strongest bond on Earth,
era el vínculo más fuerte en la Tierra,
more than anything in the world,
más que a nada en el mundo,
would be better off without her.
estarían mejor sin ella.
I've learned from others
y he aprendido de otros
the so-called decision or choice
that we choose what car to drive
elegimos qué auto conducir
in an extremely suicidal state,
extremadamente suicida,
medical health emergency.
emergencia médica de salud.
lost access to tools of self-governance.
y pierde el control de sí.
make a plan and act with logic,
y actuar con lógica,
is distorted by a filter of pain
se distorsiona por un filtro de dolor
interpret their reality.
interpreta su realidad.
at hiding this state,
muy bien este estado,
good reasons for doing that.
para hacerlo.
suicidal thoughts at some point,
suicidas en algún momento,
ongoing thoughts of suicide
persistentes
recognized and treated
reconocida y tratada
was not purely a suicide.
no fue puramente un suicidio.
suicidal thinking became homicidal.
suicida se convirtió en homicida.
and there are no simple answers.
y no hay respuestas simples.
that was perfectionistic and self-reliant,
perfeccionista y autosuficiente
to seek help from others.
que buscase ayuda en otros.
triggering events at the school
en la escuela
debased and humiliated and mad.
y perturbaron.
of rage and alienation,
sentimientos de rabia y enajenación,
owned any in our home.
armas en casa.
for a 17-year-old boy to buy guns,
armas a un muchacho de 17 años,
without my permission or knowledge.
sin mi permiso o conocimiento.
and many school shootings later,
y muchos tiroteos en escuelas más tarde,
I got breast cancer,
tuve cáncer de mama,
I began to have mental health problems.
a tener problemas de salud mental.
into a family member
con algún familiar
a terrible parent or a disgusting person.
o persona desagradable.
four years after the shootings,
cuatro años tras los disparos,
for the depositions
the victims' families face to face.
de las víctimas, cara a cara.
six years after the shootings,
seis años tras los disparos,
to speak publicly about murder-suicide
en público del asesinato-suicidio
into this spinning cycle of terror
en este ciclo de terror
or reason my way out of it,
was trying to kill me,
to have a malfunctioning mind,
became a brain health advocate.
de la salud del cerebro.
as normal under the circumstances.
dadas las circunstancias.
on all that had happened,
spiral into dysfunction
de disfunción de mi hijo
over a period of about two years,
de unos dos años,
that he needed help
and taps into my feelings of guilt
un sentimiento de culpa
how much we want to believe we can,
cuánto queramos creer que podemos,
piensan y sienten
that we are somehow different,
que somos diferentes,
would never think of hurting themselves
nunca pensaría en hacerse daño
do come to pass,
to forgive ourselves for not knowing
a perdonarnos por no saber
puede estar sufriendo,
to what the other families lost.
con la pérdida de otras familias.
doesn't make theirs any easier.
no hace la suya más fácil.
I don't have the right to any pain,
que no tengo derecho a ningún dolor,
de penitencia permanente.
the most vigilant and responsible of us
el más vigilante y responsable
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Sue Klebold - ActivistSue Klebold has become a passionate agent working to advance mental health awareness and intervention.
Why you should listen
Sue Klebold is the mother of Dylan Klebold, one of the two shooters at Columbine High School in 1999. Since the massacre, Sue has spent years excavating every detail of her family life, and trying to understand what she could have done to prevent it. In 2016, after years of evading public scrutiny, Klebold published A Mother's Reckoning: Living In the Aftermath of Tragedy, a powerful memoir in which she explores the crucial intersection between mental health and violence. As a passionate advocate for brain health awareness and intervention, she is donating any profits from the book to mental health charities, research and suicide prevention, hoping for solutions that will help parents and professionals spot and thwart signs of trouble.
Sue Klebold | Speaker | TED.com