TED2009
Elizabeth Gilbert: Your elusive creative genius
Elizabeth Gilbert govori o njegovanju kreativnosti
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Spisateljica Elizabeth Gilbert promišlja o nemogućim zahtjevima koje stavljamo pred umjetnike i pritom izlaže radikalnu zamisao da svi mi "imamo" vlastiti genij na raspolaganju - a ne da tek rijetki, izabrani ljudi "jesu" genijalci. Duhovit, duboko osoban i iznenađujuće dirljiv govor.
Elizabeth Gilbert - Writer
The author of 'Eat, Pray, Love,' Elizabeth Gilbert has thought long and hard about some big topics. Her fascinations: genius, creativity and how we get in our own way when it comes to both. Full bio
The author of 'Eat, Pray, Love,' Elizabeth Gilbert has thought long and hard about some big topics. Her fascinations: genius, creativity and how we get in our own way when it comes to both. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:13
I am a writer.
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Spisateljica sam.
00:15
Writing books is my profession but it's more than that, of course.
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Pisanje knjiga moj je poziv i puno više od toga, naravno.
00:19
It is also my great lifelong love and fascination.
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Ujedno je velika, doživotna ljubav i strast.
00:23
And I don't expect that that's ever going to change.
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Ne vjerujem da će se to ikada promijeniti.
00:25
But, that said, something kind of peculiar has happened recently
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No nedavno se dogodilo nešto neobično
00:30
in my life and in my career,
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u mom životu i karijeri,
00:33
which has caused me to have to recalibrate my whole relationship with this work.
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zbog čega sam iznova morala procijeniti odnos prema svom radu.
00:38
And the peculiar thing is that I recently wrote this book,
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Ne tako davno napisala sam knjigu,
00:41
this memoir called "Eat, Pray, Love"
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memoare pod naslovom "Jedi, moli, voli".
00:43
which, decidedly unlike any of my previous books,
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Za razliku od svih mojih prijašnjih knjiga
00:48
went out in the world for some reason, and became this big,
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ova je iz nekog razloga po izlasku postala veliki hit,
00:51
mega-sensation, international bestseller thing.
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mega senzacija i međunarodni bestseler.
00:54
The result of which is that everywhere I go now,
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Kamo god sada pođem gledaju me
00:57
people treat me like I'm doomed.
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kao da sam osuđena na propast.
01:00
Seriously -- doomed, doomed!
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Ozbiljno! Kao da mi se sprema slom.
01:03
Like, they come up to me now, all worried, and they say,
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Ljudi mi prilaze vrlo zabrinuti i kažu:
01:05
"Aren't you afraid you're never going to be able to top that?
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"Zar te nije strah da nećeš to moći nadmašiti?
01:10
Aren't you afraid you're going to keep writing for your whole life
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Ne bojiš li se da ćeš pisati do kraja života
01:13
and you're never again going to create a book
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a da nikada više nećeš napisati knjigu
01:15
that anybody in the world cares about at all,
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do koje će ljudima biti stalo...
01:18
ever again?"
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ikada... više?"
01:20
So that's reassuring, you know.
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To je zbilja ohrabrujuće.
01:22
But it would be worse, except for that I happen to remember
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Ali moglo bi biti i gore, jer sjećam se da kada sam
01:25
that over 20 years ago, when I first started telling people -- when I was a teenager --
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prije 20 godina kao tinejdžerica prvi puta pričala
01:29
that I wanted to be a writer,
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da želim biti spisateljica,
01:31
I was met with this same kind of, sort of fear-based reaction.
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susretala sam se s istom reakcijom, zasnovanom na strahu.
01:34
And people would say, "Aren't you afraid you're never going to have any success?
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Znali bi mi reći: "Zar te nije strah da nećeš uspjeti?
01:37
Aren't you afraid the humiliation of rejection will kill you?
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Ne bojiš li se da će te poniženje i odbijanje ubiti?
01:40
Aren't you afraid that you're going to work your whole life at this craft
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Ne plašiš li se da ćeš uložiti cijeli svoj život u to umijeće
01:43
and nothing's ever going to come of it
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i da od njega neće biti ništa
01:45
and you're going to die on a scrap heap of broken dreams
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pa ćeš umrijeti srca slomljena neostvarenim snovima
01:47
with your mouth filled with bitter ash of failure?"
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i usta punih gorkog pepela neuspjeha?"
01:51
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
01:53
Like that, you know.
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Tako nešto.
01:55
The answer -- the short answer to all those questions is, "Yes."
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Kratak odgovor na sva ta pitanja je "Da".
02:00
Yes, I'm afraid of all those things.
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Da, sve me to plaši.
02:02
And I always have been.
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I oduvijek me plašilo.
02:03
And I'm afraid of many, many more things besides
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Bojim se i mnogih drugih stvari
02:06
that people can't even guess at,
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koje ne možete ni naslutiti,
02:08
like seaweed and other things that are scary.
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poput morskih trava i drugih grozota.
02:12
But, when it comes to writing,
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Što se tiče pisanja
02:14
the thing that I've been sort of thinking about lately, and wondering about lately, is why?
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u zadnje vrijeme razmišljam i pitam se - pa zašto?
02:18
You know, is it rational?
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Ima li to ikakvog smisla?
02:20
Is it logical that anybody should be expected
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Je li logično da bi se od bilo koga trebalo očekivati
02:23
to be afraid of the work that they feel they were put on this Earth to do.
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da se boji rada za koji osjeća da je stvoren?
02:27
And what is it specifically about creative ventures
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Što nas to u kreativnim poduhvatima tjera
02:32
that seems to make us really nervous about each other's mental health
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da nervozno propitkujemo svoje i tuđe mentalno zdravlje
02:35
in a way that other careers kind of don't do, you know?
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dok ljudi drugih profesija to ne čine?
02:38
Like my dad, for example, was a chemical engineer
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Na primjer, moja tata je inženjer kemije.
02:42
and I don't recall once in his 40 years of chemical engineering
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Ne sjećam se da ga je itko u njegovih 40 godina karijere
02:45
anybody asking him if he was afraid to be a chemical engineer, you know?
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upitao boji li se biti inženjerom kemije.
02:49
It didn't -- that chemical-engineering block, John, how's it going?
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Ta strašna kemičarska blokada... pa, John, kako ti ide?
02:55
It just didn't come up like that, you know?
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Toga jednostavno nema.
02:57
But to be fair, chemical engineers as a group
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Ali, ako ćemo pravo, inženjeri kemije
03:01
haven't really earned a reputation over the centuries
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nisu tijekom stoljeća zaradili reputaciju
03:03
for being alcoholic manic-depressives.
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maničnih depresivaca i alkoholičara.
03:06
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
03:08
We writers, we kind of do have that reputation,
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Nas pisce bije taj glas.
03:11
and not just writers, but creative people across all genres,
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Ne samo pisce, već kreativce općenito.
03:14
it seems, have this reputation for being enormously mentally unstable.
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Čini se da nas gledaju kao mentalno izrazito nestabilne.
03:19
And all you have to do is look at the very grim death count
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Pogledajte samo tu tužnu statistiku
03:23
in the 20th century alone, of really magnificent creative minds
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dvadesetog stoljeća. Koliko je izvanrednih kreativnih umova
03:27
who died young and often at their own hands, you know?
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umrlo prerano, često i od svoje ruke.
03:30
And even the ones who didn't literally commit suicide
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Čak i one koji nisu doslovno počinili samoubojstvo
03:33
seem to be really undone by their gifts, you know.
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kao da je dotukao vlastiti dar.
03:36
Norman Mailer, just before he died, last interview, he said
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Norman Mailer, u svom posljednjem intervjuu, tik prije smrti, rekao je:
03:39
"Every one of my books has killed me a little more."
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"Svaka moja nova knjiga pomalo me ubila."
03:43
An extraordinary statement to make about your life's work.
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Kakva nevjerojatna izjava! Tako se izraziti o svom životnom djelu...
03:47
But we don't even blink when we hear somebody say this
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No, čak ni ne trepnemo kad čujemo takvu izjavu
03:50
because we've heard that kind of stuff for so long
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jer smo toliko često čuli,
03:53
and somehow we've completely internalized and accepted collectively
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u potpunosti usvojili i kolektivno prihvatili ideju
03:57
this notion that creativity and suffering are somehow inherently linked
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da su kreativnost i patnja nerazdvojno povezani
04:01
and that artistry, in the end, will always ultimately lead to anguish.
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i da će nas umjetnički put nedvojbeno dovesti do stradanja i propasti.
04:06
And the question that I want to ask everybody here today
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Pitanje koje danas svima vama želim postaviti
04:08
is are you guys all cool with that idea?
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jest... je li vama to stvarno prihvatljiva ideja?
04:11
Are you comfortable with that?
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Je li vam to skroz u redu?
04:14
Because you look at it even from an inch away and, you know ...
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Jer kad se makar malo odmaknete od nje...
04:17
I'm not at all comfortable with that assumption.
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Ja uopće nisam zadovoljna tom pretpostavkom.
04:20
I think it's odious.
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Ja mislim da je grozna!
04:21
And I also think it's dangerous,
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I još k tome opasna.
04:23
and I don't want to see it perpetuated into the next century.
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Ne želim da se ponavlja i u narednom stoljeću.
04:26
I think it's better if we encourage our great creative minds to live.
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Mislim da je bolje izvanredne, kreativne umove ohrabrivati da žive.
04:30
And I definitely know that, in my case -- in my situation --
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Sa sigurnošću mogu reći, u mojoj bi situaciji
04:36
it would be very dangerous for me to start sort of leaking down that dark path
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bilo vrlo opasno da krenem padati niz mračnu stazu
04:41
of assumption, particularly given the circumstance
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te pretpostavke, osobito u ovom razdoblju
04:44
that I'm in right now in my career.
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moje karijere.
04:46
Which is -- you know, like check it out,
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Pogledajte me...
04:49
I'm pretty young, I'm only about 40 years old.
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još sam prilično mlada, tek mi je četrdesetak.
04:51
I still have maybe another four decades of work left in me.
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Predamnom je možda još 4 desetljeća rada.
04:54
And it's exceedingly likely that anything I write from this point forward
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I vrlo je vjerojatno da će što god da napišem, od ovog trenutka na dalje,
04:59
is going to be judged by the world as the work that came after
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biti ocijenjeno kao djelo nastalo nakon
05:02
the freakish success of my last book, right?
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zastrašujućeg uspjeha moje prošle knjige.
05:05
I should just put it bluntly, because we're all sort of friends here now --
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Reći ću to izravno, jer smo svi ovdje više-manje prijatelji,
05:09
it's exceedingly likely that my greatest success is behind me.
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prilično je vjerojatno da je moj najveći uspjeh iza mene.
05:13
So Jesus, what a thought!
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Zaboga, kakva pomisao!
05:16
That's the kind of thought that could lead a person
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To je baš ona vrsta misli koja vas može dovesti do toga
05:18
to start drinking gin at nine o'clock in the morning,
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da počnete piti džin u devet sati ujutro.
05:21
and I don't want to go there.
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A ja ne bih tim putem.
05:24
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
05:25
I would prefer to keep doing this work that I love.
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Radije bih nastavila s poslom koji volim.
05:27
And so, the question becomes, how?
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Što dovodi do pitanja - kako?
05:31
And so, it seems to me, upon a lot of reflection,
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Nakon mnogo razmišljanja, čini mi se da
05:33
that the way that I have to work now, in order to continue writing,
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kako bih nastavila pisati
05:37
is that I have to create some sort of protective psychological construct, right?
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moram osmisliti neku vrstu psihološke zaštite.
05:41
I have to sort of find some way to have a safe distance
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Pronaći neku vrstu distance koja će me štititi
05:44
between me, as I am writing, and my very natural anxiety
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i koju ću, dok pišem, postaviti između mene i moje prirodne tjeskobe
05:49
about what the reaction to that writing is going to be, from now on.
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koja brine o reakciji na moj budući rad.
05:53
And, as I've been looking over the last year for models for how to do that
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Prošle sam godine tražila uzore prema kojima bih to učinila.
05:57
I've been sort of looking across time,
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Kao da sam pretraživala povijest
05:59
and I've been trying to find other societies
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i pokušavala pronaći drukčija društva
06:01
to see if they might have had better and saner ideas than we have
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koja su možda imala bolje i zdravije zamisli od onih koje mi imamo
06:05
about how to help creative people, sort of manage
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o tome kako pomoći kreativcima da se nose
06:08
the inherent emotional risks of creativity.
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s neizbježnim emotivnim rizicima kreativnosti.
06:11
And that search has led me to ancient Greece and ancient Rome.
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Potraga me dovela u antičko doba: u Grčku i Rim.
06:16
So stay with me, because it does circle around and back.
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Pratite me, jer priča ide u širinu i napravit će puni krug.
06:19
But, ancient Greece and ancient Rome --
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Dakle... u antičko doba
06:21
people did not happen to believe that creativity
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ljudi nisu vjerovali da kreativnost
06:24
came from human beings back then, O.K.?
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dolazi od ljudskih bića.
06:26
People believed that creativity was this divine attendant spirit
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Vjerovali su da je kreativnost božanski, zaštitnički duh
06:30
that came to human beings from some distant and unknowable source,
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koji je ljudskom biću prišao iz dalekog i nespoznatljivog izvorišta,
06:34
for distant and unknowable reasons.
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zbog dalekih i nespoznatljivih razloga.
06:37
The Greeks famously called these divine attendant spirits of creativity "daemons."
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Stari Grci ta su božanska bića, zaštitnike kreativnosti nazivali "demonima".
06:42
Socrates, famously, believed that he had a daemon
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Sokrat je bio poznat po tome što je vjerovao da ima demona
06:45
who spoke wisdom to him from afar.
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koji mu je šaptao mudrost u uho iz daljina.
06:48
The Romans had the same idea,
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Stari Rimljani dijelili su istu ideju,
06:49
but they called that sort of disembodied creative spirit a genius.
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no oni su te bestjelesne duhove kreativnosti nazivali "genijima".
06:54
Which is great, because the Romans did not actually think
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To je odličan primjer, jer Rimljani zapravo nisu vjerovali
06:57
that a genius was a particularly clever individual.
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da je genij neka osobito pametna osoba.
06:59
They believed that a genius was this, sort of magical divine entity,
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Vjerovali su da je genij neko magično božansko biće
07:03
who was believed to literally live in the walls
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koje doslovno živi u zidovima
07:07
of an artist's studio, kind of like Dobby the house elf,
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umjetnikovog studija, poput kućnog vilenjaka,
07:11
and who would come out and sort of invisibly assist the artist with their work
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koje izlazi van, nevidljivo pomaže umjetniku pri poslu
07:15
and would shape the outcome of that work.
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i tako oblikuje krajnji ishod djela.
07:18
So brilliant -- there it is, right there, that distance that I'm talking about --
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I eto, odlično! To je upravo ta distanca o kojoj govorim,
07:21
that psychological construct to protect you from the results of your work.
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ta psihološka barijera koja nas štiti od rezultata našeg rada.
07:26
And everyone knew that this is how it functioned, right?
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I svi su znali da to tako funkcionira.
07:29
So the ancient artist was protected from certain things,
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Pa je antički umjetnik bio zaštićen od,
07:32
like, for example, too much narcissism, right?
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primjerice, previše narcizma.
07:34
If your work was brilliant you couldn't take all the credit for it,
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Ako bi tvoje djelo bilo izvrsno, ne bi mogao sve zasluge pripisati sebi.
07:37
everybody knew that you had this disembodied genius who had helped you.
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Svi su znali da imaš bestjelesnog genija koji ti je pomagao.
07:41
If your work bombed, not entirely your fault, you know?
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A ako ti je djelo bilo bez veze to nije bila samo tvoja greška.
07:45
Everyone knew your genius was kind of lame.
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Svi su znali da je tvoj genij ispao bezveznjak.
07:48
And this is how people thought about creativity in the West for a really long time.
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Dugo su vremena i ljudi Zapada o kreativnosti promišljali na taj način.
07:53
And then the Renaissance came and everything changed,
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Onda je stigla renesansa i sve se promijenilo.
07:55
and we had this big idea, and the big idea was
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Dobili smo veliku ideju. A ona glasi:
07:57
let's put the individual human being at the center of the universe
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"Haj'mo staviti ljudsku osobu u središte svemira,
08:01
above all gods and mysteries, and there's no more room
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ponad svih bogova i misterija". Pa više nije bilo mjesta
08:03
for mystical creatures who take dictation from the divine.
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za mistična bića koja prenose božanski diktat.
08:06
And it's the beginning of rational humanism,
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Bio je to početak racionalizma
08:09
and people started to believe that creativity
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i ljudi su počeli vjerovati da kreativnost
08:11
came completely from the self of the individual.
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u potpunosti proizlazi iz osobnosti ljudskog bića.
08:13
And for the first time in history,
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Po prvi puta u pisanoj povijesti
08:16
you start to hear people referring to this or that artist as being a genius
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mogli ste čuti da o se nekom umjetniku govori kao da jest genij,
08:21
rather than having a genius.
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umjesto da neki umjetnik ima genija uza sebe.
08:22
And I got to tell you, I think that was a huge error.
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Iskreno, mislim da je to bila velika greška.
08:26
You know, I think that allowing somebody, one mere person
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Dopustiti nekome, jednoj običnoj osobi
08:30
to believe that he or she is like, the vessel,
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da vjeruje da je posuda,
08:33
you know, like the font and the essence and the source
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i izvorište, i srž, i izvor sveprisutne
08:35
of all divine, creative, unknowable, eternal mystery
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božanske, stvaralačke, nespoznatljive, vječne misterije...
08:39
is just a smidge too much responsibility to put on one fragile, human psyche.
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To kao da je mrvicu prevelika odgovornost za krhku ljudsku psihu.
08:45
It's like asking somebody to swallow the sun.
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Otprilike kao da nekoga tražite da proguta sunce.
08:48
It just completely warps and distorts egos,
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To sasvim iskrivljuje i izobličuje ego
08:51
and it creates all these unmanageable expectations about performance.
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i stvara sva ta nebulozna očekivanja rezultata.
08:55
And I think the pressure of that
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Smatram da je taj strašan pritisak
08:57
has been killing off our artists for the last 500 years.
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ubijao naše umjetnike posljednih 500 godina.
09:00
And, if this is true,
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Ako je to točno,
09:02
and I think it is true,
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a ja mislim da jest,
09:04
the question becomes, what now?
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postavlja se pitanje - što sad?
09:07
Can we do this differently?
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Možemo li što promijeniti?
09:09
Maybe go back to some more ancient understanding
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Možda bismo se mogli vratiti drevnom shvaćanju
09:12
about the relationship between humans and the creative mystery.
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odnosa između ljudskih bića i stvaralačke misterije.
09:17
Maybe not.
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A možda i ne.
09:18
Maybe we can't just erase 500 years of rational humanistic thought
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Možda ne možemo obrisati 500 godina racionalističke filozofije
09:22
in one 18 minute speech.
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u jednom 18-minutnom govoru.
09:24
And there's probably people in this audience
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U publici se zasigurno nalaze ljudi
09:27
who would raise really legitimate scientific suspicions
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koji će, znanstveno sasvim legitimno,
09:31
about the notion of, basically fairies
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podići obrvu na spomen vila i vilenjaka
09:33
who follow people around rubbing fairy juice on their projects and stuff.
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koji naokolo slijede ljude posipajući im čarobni prah po projektima.
09:38
I'm not, probably, going to bring you all along with me on this.
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Najvjerojatnije neću uspjeti baš sve vas zainteresirati za tu ideju.
09:43
But the question that I kind of want to pose is --
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No, pitanje koje bih rado postavila je...
09:45
you know, why not?
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Zašto da ne?
09:48
Why not think about it this way?
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Zašto ne bismo o tome razmišljali na taj način?
09:49
Because it makes as much sense as anything else I have ever heard
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Jer ima jednako smisla kao i sva ostala objašnjenja koja sam čula
09:54
in terms of explaining the utter maddening capriciousness
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za krajnje izluđujuću hirovitost
09:58
of the creative process.
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kreativnog procesa.
09:59
A process which, as anybody who has ever tried to make something --
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Procesa koji se, kao što znaju svi koji su probali nešto stvoriti
10:02
which is to say basically everyone here ---
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- a rekla bih da su to svi ovdje prisutni -
10:04
knows does not always behave rationally.
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ne ponaša uvijek predvidljivo i racionalno.
10:07
And, in fact, can sometimes feel downright paranormal.
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Ponekad je to skoro pa paranormalno iskustvo.
10:12
I had this encounter recently where I met the extraordinary American poet Ruth Stone,
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Nedavno sam imala priliku sresti izvanrednu američku pjesnikinju Ruth Stone.
10:18
who's now in her 90s, but she's been a poet her entire life
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Ušla je u devedesete i cijeloga je života pjesnikinja.
10:20
and she told me that when she was growing up in rural Virginia,
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Ispričala mi je kako je odrastajući u ruralnom dijelu Virginije
10:24
she would be out working in the fields,
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često radila u polju.
10:25
and she said she would feel and hear a poem
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Osjetila bi i čula pjesmu
10:28
coming at her from over the landscape.
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kako joj dolazi u susret s druge strane horizonta.
10:30
And she said it was like a thunderous train of air.
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Kaže da je to bilo poput gromkog zračnog vala
10:34
And it would come barreling down at her over the landscape.
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koji bi se stuštio preko polja prema njoj.
10:36
And she felt it coming, because it would shake the earth under her feet.
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Po podrhtavanju tla znala je da pjesma stiže.
10:39
She knew that she had only one thing to do at that point,
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Znala je da u takvim trenucima jedino što može jest,
10:43
and that was to, in her words, "run like hell."
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prema njenim riječima, "pojuriti kao da ju vrag goni".
10:45
And she would run like hell to the house
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I tako bi mahnito trčala prema kući
10:46
and she would be getting chased by this poem,
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dok ju je pjesma gonila
10:48
and the whole deal was that she had to get to a piece of paper and a pencil
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jer valjalo je zgrabiti papir i olovku dovoljno brzo
10:51
fast enough so that when it thundered through her, she could collect it
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da stigne uhvatiti pjesmu dok tutnji kroz nju,
10:54
and grab it on the page.
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da bi je prenijela na papir.
10:56
And other times she wouldn't be fast enough,
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Znalo se događati da ne uspije trčati dovoljno brzo
10:58
so she'd be running and running and running, and she wouldn't get to the house
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iako je davala sve od sebe jureći niz polja. Kad ne bi stigla na vrijeme do kuće,
11:01
and the poem would barrel through her and she would miss it
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pjesma bi samo projurila kroz nju, neuhvaćena.
11:04
and she said it would continue on across the landscape,
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Tada bi se nastavila kotrljati niz polja
11:06
looking, as she put it "for another poet."
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tražeći, kako Ruth kaže, "nekog drugog pjesnika".
11:09
And then there were these times --
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A ponekad bi
11:12
this is the piece I never forgot --
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- ovaj dio priče neću nikada zaboraviti -
11:14
she said that there were moments where she would almost miss it, right?
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ponekad bi se dogodilo da ju skoro ne uhvati.
11:17
So, she's running to the house and she's looking for the paper
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Dok bi trčala kući, tražeći komad papira
11:20
and the poem passes through her,
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a pjesma bi kroz nju tutnjala,
11:22
and she grabs a pencil just as it's going through her,
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ugrabila bi olovku baš u trenutku kad bi pjesma kroz nju prošla
11:25
and then she said, it was like she would reach out with her other hand
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i ona bi pružila drugu ruku i posegnula za njom
11:27
and she would catch it.
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da ju uhvati.
11:29
She would catch the poem by its tail,
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Tako bi uhvatila pjesmu za rep
11:31
and she would pull it backwards into her body
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i povukla je natraške u svoje tijelo
11:34
as she was transcribing on the page.
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dok bi ju zapisivala na stranicu.
11:36
And in these instances, the poem would come up on the page perfect and intact
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U tim slučajevima, pjesma bi se pojavila na papiru, savršena i neoštećena
11:41
but backwards, from the last word to the first.
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no zapisana natraške, od posljednje riječi prema prvoj.
11:44
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
11:46
So when I heard that I was like -- that's uncanny,
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Kad sam to čula... ma nevjerojatno!
11:50
that's exactly what my creative process is like.
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Baš tako izgleda i moj kreativni proces.
11:53
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
11:57
That's not at all what my creative process is -- I'm not the pipeline!
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Ma ne. Moje stvaralaštvo nije takvo - ja nisam cjevovod!
12:00
I'm a mule, and the way that I have to work
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Ja sam mazga. Moj način rada zahtijeva
12:01
is that I have to get up at the same time every day,
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da ustajem u isto vrijeme svako jutro
12:03
and sweat and labor and barrel through it really awkwardly.
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znojim se i napinjem i probijam se na kojekakve nezgodne načine.
12:06
But even I, in my mulishness,
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No, pa čak i ja, u svojoj mazgovitosti,
12:09
even I have brushed up against that thing, at times.
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čak sam i ja to dotakla, ponekad.
12:13
And I would imagine that a lot of you have too.
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Vjerujem da ste i vi to iskusili.
12:15
You know, even I have had work or ideas come through me from a source
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Čak su i meni djela i ideje stizale s izvora
12:18
that I honestly cannot identify.
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kojeg, iskreno, ne mogu razabrati.
12:21
And what is that thing?
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Što je to?
12:22
And how are we to relate to it in a way that will not make us lose our minds,
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I kako se prema tome možemo odnositi tako da ne izgubimo razum,
12:26
but, in fact, might actually keep us sane?
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već, dapače, da nam pomogne kako bismo ostali bistre glave?
12:29
And for me, the best contemporary example that I have of how to do that
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Najbolji suvremeni primjer na kojeg sam naišla
12:33
is the musician Tom Waits,
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je glazbenik Tom Waits.
12:35
who I got to interview several years ago on a magazine assignment.
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Intervjuirala sam ga prije nekoliko godina za jedan časopis.
12:40
And we were talking about this,
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I tako smo razgovarali o tome, a znate da je
12:41
and you know, Tom, for most of his life he was pretty much the embodiment
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Tom cijeloga života bio pravo utjelovljenje
12:45
of the tormented contemporary modern artist,
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izmučenog suvremenog umjetnika
12:47
trying to control and manage and dominate
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koji pokušava upravljati, kontrolirati i dominirati
12:50
these sort of uncontrollable creative impulses
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tim neukrotivim kreativnim impulsima
12:52
that were totally internalized.
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koji su mu potpuno iznutra.
12:54
But then he got older, he got calmer,
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S vremenom, s godinama, postajao je sve smireniji
12:56
and one day he was driving down the freeway in Los Angeles he told me,
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i jednog dana vozio je auto cestom kroz Los Angeles, kaže,
12:59
and this is when it all changed for him.
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i tada se sve promijenilo.
13:01
And he's speeding along, and all of a sudden
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Dok je stiskao gas, iznenada
13:03
he hears this little fragment of melody,
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začuje djelić melodije koja mu se pojavila u umu,
13:06
that comes into his head as inspiration often comes, elusive and tantalizing,
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kako to inspiracija često dođe, nedostižna i nadražujuća
13:10
and he wants it, you know, it's gorgeous,
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i on ju želi, predivna je,
13:13
and he longs for it, but he has no way to get it.
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čezne za njom, ali nema je kako uhvatiti.
13:15
He doesn't have a piece of paper, he doesn't have a pencil,
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Nema komad papira, nema olovku,
13:17
he doesn't have a tape recorder.
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nema diktafon.
13:18
So he starts to feel all of that old anxiety start to rise in him
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Osjeti kako ga preplavljuje dobro mu poznata tjeskoba
13:21
like, "I'm going to lose this thing,
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nešto u stilu: "Dođavola, izgubit ću ju
13:23
and then I'm going to be haunted by this song forever.
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i onda će me ta pjesma zauvijek progoniti.
13:25
I'm not good enough, and I can't do it."
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I sve drugo što napišem, neće biti dovoljno dobro."
13:27
And instead of panicking, he just stopped.
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Umjesto da se prepusti navali panike, zaustavio se.
13:29
He just stopped that whole mental process
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Prekinuo je cijeli taj mentalni slijed u svojoj glavi
13:31
and he did something completely novel.
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i napravio nešto sasvim drugačije. Nešto novo.
13:33
He just looked up at the sky, and he said,
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Pogledao je prema nebu i rekao:
13:36
"Excuse me, can you not see that I'm driving?"
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"Oprosti, zar ne vidiš da vozim?"
13:39
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
13:42
"Do I look like I can write down a song right now?
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"Da li ti izgledam kao da sad mogu zapisati melodiju?
13:45
If you really want to exist, come back at a more opportune moment
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Ako doista želiš postojati, vrati se u nekom prikladnijem trenutku
13:49
when I can take care of you.
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kad se mogu pobrinuti za tebe.
13:51
Otherwise, go bother somebody else today.
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Ako baš moraš danas, odi gnjaviti nekog drugog.
13:54
Go bother Leonard Cohen."
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Idi gnjavi... Leonarda Cohena."
13:57
And his whole work process changed after that.
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Nakon tog događaja njegov se kreativni proces promijenio.
14:00
Not the work, the work was still oftentimes as dark as ever.
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Ne njegov rad, djela su mu često mračna kao i inače,
14:04
But the process, and the heavy anxiety around it
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već kreativni proces. Grozna tjeskoba koja ga je pratila
14:07
was released when he took the genie, the genius out of him
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nestala je kada je duh genija izvadio iz samog sebe,
14:10
where it was causing nothing but trouble, and released it kind of back where it came from,
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gdje je samo stvarao probleme, i vratio ga tamo odakle je stigao
14:13
and realized that this didn't have to be this internalized, tormented thing.
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shvativši da stvaralaštvo ne mora biti unutarnji, mučenički proces.
14:17
It could be this peculiar, wondrous, bizarre collaboration
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Zašto ne bi radije bilo čudnovata, čudesna, neuobičajena suradnja?
14:20
kind of conversation between Tom and the strange, external thing
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Neka vrsta razgovora između Toma i nepoznate, izvanjske sile
14:25
that was not quite Tom.
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koja nije u potpunosti Tom.
14:27
So when I heard that story it started to shift a little bit
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Kad sam čula tu priču, i sama sam napravila pomak
14:30
the way that I worked too, and it already saved me once.
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u načinu na koji sam stvarala i to me već jednom spasilo.
14:32
This idea, it saved me when I was in the middle of writing "Eat, Pray, Love,"
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Ta zamisao me spasila usred pisanja "Jedi, moli, voli".
14:36
and I fell into one of those, sort of pits of despair
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Pala sam u jednu od onih provalija očajanja
14:38
that we all fall into when we're working on something and it's not coming
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u koji svi upadamo kad radimo na nečemu, a nikako da nam krene
14:42
and you start to think this is going to be a disaster,
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pa počnemo misliti: "To će biti prava katastrofa."
14:44
this is going to be the worst book ever written.
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Najgora knjiga ikad napisana.
14:46
Not just bad, but the worst book ever written.
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Ne samo loša, već najgora knjiga svih vremena!
14:48
And I started to think I should just dump this project.
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Kad sam počela razmišljati trebam li odustati,
14:52
But then I remembered Tom talking to the open air
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sjetila sam se Toma kako priča zraku
14:55
and I tried it.
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i odlučila pokušati isto.
14:57
So I just lifted my face up from the manuscript
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Podigla sam pogled s rukopisa
14:59
and I directed my comments to an empty corner of the room.
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i izravno se obratila praznom kutu sobe.
15:02
And I said aloud, "Listen you, thing,
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Rekla sam na glas: "Slušaj ti... nešto,
15:06
you and I both know that if this book isn't brilliant
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ti i ja vrlo dobro znamo da ukoliko knjiga ne ispadne sjajno
15:09
that is not entirely my fault, right?
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to neće biti sasvim moja greška.
15:11
Because you can see that I am putting everything I have into this,
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I sam možeš vidjeti da dajem sve od sebe.
15:14
I don't have any more than this.
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Više od toga nemam.
15:15
So if you want it to be better, then you've got to show up and do your part of the deal.
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Pa ako želiš da knjiga bude bolja, izvoli se pojaviti i napraviti svoj dio posla.
15:19
O.K. But if you don't do that, you know what, the hell with it.
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U redu? Ali ako nećeš, nema veze.
15:22
I'm going to keep writing anyway because that's my job.
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Ja ću nastaviti pisati jer to je moj posao.
15:25
And I would please like the record to reflect today
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I molim neka uđe u zapisnik da sam se danas
15:26
that I showed up for my part of the job."
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uredno pojavila i odradila svoj dio.
15:29
(Laughter)
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(Smijeh)
15:32
Because --
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Jer...
15:35
(Applause)
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(Pljesak)
15:37
in the end it's like this, O.K. --
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na kraju krajeva, to je ovako...
15:39
centuries ago in the deserts of North Africa,
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2401
Prije nekoliko stoljeća, u pustinjama sjeverne Afrike
15:41
people used to gather for these moonlight dances of sacred dance and music
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ljudi su se okupljali i plesali svete plesove pod mjesečinom
15:46
that would go on for hours and hours, until dawn.
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plesali su satima i satima, sve do zore.
15:49
And they were always magnificent, because the dancers were professionals
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Uvijek su bili prekrasni! Plesači su bili profesionalci.
15:52
and they were terrific, right?
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Plesali su izvanredno.
15:53
But every once in a while, very rarely, something would happen,
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Tu i tamo, ne baš često, dogodilo bi se nešto neobično
15:57
and one of these performers would actually become transcendent.
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i jedan od izvođača nadišao bi sebe.
16:00
And I know you know what I'm talking about,
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Znate o čemu govorim, jer svi ste
16:02
because I know you've all seen, at some point in your life, a performance like this.
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u nekom trenutku svog života vidjeli takvu izvedbu.
16:06
It was like time would stop,
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Vrijeme kao da stane
16:08
and the dancer would sort of step through some kind of portal
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a plesač kao da zakorači kroz neki tajni prolaz
16:11
and he wasn't doing anything different than he had ever done, 1,000 nights before,
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i čini sve isto kao što je činio već tisuću puta prije
16:15
but everything would align.
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no, sada se sve povezalo.
16:17
And all of a sudden, he would no longer appear to be merely human.
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I najednom, skoro pa da ne izgleda kao čovjek.
16:20
He would be lit from within, and lit from below
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Kao da iz njega zrači svjetlost, iznutra i izvana.
16:23
and all lit up on fire with divinity.
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Obasjan je svjetlošću božanskoga.
16:26
And when this happened, back then,
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Kada bi se to dogodilo, u ono drevno vrijeme
16:29
people knew it for what it was, you know, they called it by its name.
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ljudi su znali što se zbiva. Imali su ime za to.
16:33
They would put their hands together and they would start to chant,
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Spojili bi ruke i počeli zazivati:
16:35
"Allah, Allah, Allah, God, God, God."
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"Allah, Allah, Allah! Bog, Bog, Bog!"
16:40
That's God, you know.
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To je Bog!
16:43
Curious historical footnote --
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Zanimljiva povijesna fusnota...
16:45
when the Moors invaded southern Spain, they took this custom with them
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kad su Mauri okupirali južnu Španjolsku, donijeli su sa sobom i taj običaj.
16:50
and the pronunciation changed over the centuries
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Izgovor se tijekom stoljeća promijenio
16:52
from "Allah, Allah, Allah," to "Olé, olé, olé,"
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iz :"Allah, Allah, Allah!" u "Olé, Olé, Olé!", što i danas
16:55
which you still hear in bullfights and in flamenco dances.
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čujete na borbama bikova i pri plesanju flamenka.
16:58
In Spain, when a performer has done something impossible and magic,
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U Španjolskoj, kad izvođač napravi nešto nemoguće i čudesno, čuje se
17:02
"Allah, olé, olé, Allah, magnificent, bravo,"
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"Allah, Olé, Olé, Allah, veličanstveno, bravo,
17:05
incomprehensible, there it is -- a glimpse of God.
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nespoznatljivo, evo ga - tračak samog Boga."
17:09
Which is great, because we need that.
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To je predivno. Svima nam to treba.
17:11
But, the tricky bit comes the next morning,
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Nezgodno postaje jutro poslije,
17:15
for the dancer himself, when he wakes up
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za samog plesača. Kad se probudi
17:18
and discovers that it's Tuesday at 11 a.m., and he's no longer a glimpse of God.
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i shvati da je danas utorak, 11 sati ujutro, i da on više nije tračak Boga.
17:22
He's just an aging mortal with really bad knees,
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Već smrtnik koji stari i bole ga koljena
17:25
and maybe he's never going to ascend to that height again.
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i možda nikad više neće doseći te vrhunce.
17:29
And maybe nobody will ever chant God's name again as he spins,
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Možda nikad nitko više neće zazivati Boga dok on pleše.
17:33
and what is he then to do with the rest of his life?
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I što da sad radi s ostatkom života?
17:36
This is hard.
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Teško je to.
17:37
This is one of the most painful reconciliations to make
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To je nešto najbolnije s čime se trebamo pomiriti
17:40
in a creative life.
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u svom životu stvaratelja.
17:42
But maybe it doesn't have to be quite so full of anguish
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No možda to ne bi bilo tako zahtjevno i tjeskobno
17:45
if you never happened to believe, in the first place,
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kada ne bismo, za početak, vjerovali
17:49
that the most extraordinary aspects of your being came from you.
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da najizvrsniji dijelovi našeg bića dolaze od nas samih.
17:53
But maybe if you just believed that they were on loan to you
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Zašto ne bismo vjerovali da ih samo posuđujemo
17:56
from some unimaginable source for some exquisite portion of your life
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od nekog nezamislivog izvora, tijekom veličanstvenog dijela svog života
17:59
to be passed along when you're finished, with somebody else.
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a kad završimo, onda ih proslijedimo dalje, nekom drugom.
18:03
And, you know, if we think about it this way it starts to change everything.
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Kada bismo počeli tako razmišljati, to bi promijenilo sve.
18:08
This is how I've started to think,
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Tako sam ja počela razmišljati,
18:10
and this is certainly how I've been thinking in the last few months
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pogotovo zadnjih nekoliko mjeseci
18:13
as I've been working on the book that will soon be published,
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dok sam radila na knjizi koja će uskoro ugledati svjetlo dana
18:16
as the dangerously, frighteningly over-anticipated follow up
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kao zastrašujući, totalno preočekivani nastavak
18:20
to my freakish success.
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mog jezovitog uspjeha.
18:22
And what I have to, sort of keep telling myself
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Moram si to govoriti i dalje
18:25
when I get really psyched out about that,
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kad izludim od svega.
18:27
is, don't be afraid.
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"Ne boj se."
18:29
Don't be daunted.
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"Ne plaši se."
18:31
Just do your job.
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"Samo radi svoj posao."
18:33
Continue to show up for your piece of it, whatever that might be.
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Samo nastavi redovito dolaziti. Odradi svoj dio posla, ma kakav bio.
18:36
If your job is to dance, do your dance.
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Ako je tvoje da plešeš, pleši.
18:39
If the divine, cockeyed genius assigned to your case
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Ako božanski, prevrtljivi genij dodijeljen tvom slučaju
18:43
decides to let some sort of wonderment be glimpsed, for just one moment
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odluči da se na trenutak tračak božanstvenosti nazre
18:48
through your efforts, then "Olé!"
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baš kroz tvoj trud, tada "Olé!"
18:50
And if not, do your dance anyhow.
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Ako ne, samo nastavi plesati.
18:53
And "Olé!" to you, nonetheless.
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I "Olé!" tebi, bez obzira.
18:55
I believe this and I feel that we must teach it.
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Vjerujem to. Osjećam da to moramo podučavati.
18:57
"Olé!" to you, nonetheless,
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"Olé!" tebi, bez obzira.
18:59
just for having the sheer human love and stubbornness
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Zbog čiste ljudske ljubavi i tvrdoglavosti
19:02
to keep showing up.
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da se pojaviš.
19:04
Thank you.
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Hvala.
19:06
(Applause)
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(Pljesak)
19:08
Thank you.
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Hvala.
19:09
(Applause)
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(Pljesak)
19:12
June Cohen: Olé!
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June Cohen: "Olé!"
19:14
(Applause)
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(Pljesak)
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Elizabeth Gilbert - WriterThe author of 'Eat, Pray, Love,' Elizabeth Gilbert has thought long and hard about some big topics. Her fascinations: genius, creativity and how we get in our own way when it comes to both.
Why you should listen
Elizabeth Gilbert faced down a premidlife crisis by doing what we all secretly dream of -- running off for a year. Her travels through Italy, India and Indonesia resulted in the megabestselling and deeply beloved memoir Eat, Pray, Love, about her process of finding herself by leaving home.
She's a longtime magazine writer -- covering music and politics for Spin and GQ -- as well as a novelist and short-story writer. Her books include the story collection Pilgrims, the novel Stern Men (about lobster fishermen in Maine) and a biography of the woodsman Eustace Conway, called The Last American Man. Her work has been the basis for two movies so far (Coyote Ugly, based on her own tale of working at the famously raunchy bar in New York City), and Eat, Pray, Love, with the part of Gilbert played by Julia Roberts. Not bad for a year off.
In 2010, Elizabeth published Committed, a memoir exploring her ambivalent feelings about the institution of marriage. And her 2013 novel, The Signature of All Things, is "a sprawling tale of 19th century botanical exploration."
Gilbert also owns and runs the import shop Two Buttons in Frenchtown, New Jersey.
Elizabeth Gilbert | Speaker | TED.com