Khadija Gbla: My mother’s strange definition of empowerment
خدیجه گبلا: تعریف عجیب و غریب مادرم از قدرتمندی
Khadija Gbla was born in Sierra Leone, spent her youth in Gambia, and as a teenager put down roots in Australia. She uses her cross-cultural heritage to promote understanding in both directions. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
my personal journey
پاهایتان را روی هم بیاندازید،
تمایل دارد انجام دهید.
the things your body does.
انجام میدهد اسم بگذارم.
on me, by the way.
well, that's in Sierra Leone as well.
سیرالئون هم دیده شده است.
I was checked before I got here.
قبل از آمدن معاینه شده ام.
needs more than one wife.
از یک همسر نیاز دارد.
that's what I say.
من این را میگویم.
in Sierra Leone in 1991.
در ۱۹۹۱ جنگ در سیرالئون شروع شد.
one night, everything was good.
می رفتم همه چیز خوب بود.
to kill me and my family.
من و خانواده ام را بکشند.
in Gambia, in West Africa.
سر درآوردیم، در غرب آفریقا.
was going to become of us.
قرار است چه برسرمان بیاید.
a little holiday, a little trip."
and ended up in a bush
away from us into a second hut.
و به دومین کلبه رفت.
I don't know what's going on."
نمیدانم چه اتفاقی قرار است بیافتد"
to get her off me, but I couldn't.
بلند کنم، ولی نتوانستم.
with a rusty-looking knife,
water or sunlight before.
تا حالا آب و نور ندیده بود.
to be my clitoris,
میدانم نامش کلیتوریس است،
and started cutting away, inch by inch.
شروع به بریدن کرد، ذره ذره.
so this pain will stop,
تا این درد تمام شود.
گفتن این بود: "ساکت باش."
for what felt like forever,
چیزی که همیشه احساسش میکنم،
across the floor
she's ever touched.
تا آن لحظه لمس کرده بود.
and left me there bleeding,
در حالی که خونریزی داشتم،
as to what just happened.
از اتفاقی که افتاده بود.
that we were coming to Australia,
the Sydney Olympics at the time,
المپیک سیدنی را داشتید،
to the end of the world,
به آخر دنیا می رویم،
to go after Australia.
and then Singapore.
و سپس سنگاپور.
opening the tap like this.
شیر آب را اینجوری باز کنیم.
in Adelaide, that's what I would say.
این چیزیست که من می گویم.
You must take us back to Australia."
باید ما رو به استرالیا برگردونی."
there were a lot of Asians in Australia
تعداد زیادی آسیایی در استرالیا هستند
because they were less racist.
در آنجا نژادپرستی کمتر هست.
that publication. (Laughter)
and I was the only black child there.
و من تنها بچه سباه پوست اونجا بودم.
with a bit of a color on me.
to be under the sun.
though. Not the same.
volunteering for an organization
female genital mutilation program
this program was actually about,
واقعا اون برنامه درباره چیه،
nurses and doctors
and now, Australia and London and America,
استرالیا و لندن و آمریکا،
we live in a multicultural society,
ما در جامعه ای چندفرهنگی زندگی می کنیم،
come with their culture,
با فرهنگ خودشون میان،
that we may not agree with,
دارن که ما ممکنه باهاشون موافق نباشیم؛
of female genital mutilation,
they cut off the whole clitoris
or your outer lips,
cut off the whole clitoris
to pee and have your period.
عادت ماهانه و ادرار کردن.
I pretty much had amnesia.
and traumatized by what had happened,
happened to me,
of what had happened.
آنچه اتفاق افتاده نداشتم.
had a scar down there.
it all came back to me.
همه چیز یادم اومد.
holding me down.
what was done to me was a terrible thing
بدترین کاری بوده که
it was called circumcision,
I'm a mutilated person.
من یک انسان ناقص هستم.
(Laughter)
(خنده)
pointing at your mother,
و اشاره به مادرت بکنی،
talking about, Khadija?"
You circumcised me.
that belonged to me."
and I did it to you.
و من هم برای تو کردم.
get itchy down there?"
if you were not circumcised,
اگر ختنه نمی شدی،
get itchy all the time.
to sleep around with anybody."
was very strange. (Laughter)
of our first conversation.
Dolly and Girlfriend magazines.
Anybody remember those sealed sections?
کسی این بخش مهر شده را یادش هست؟
(Laughter)
( خنده تماشاگران)
an article about pleasure
بخش در مورد لذت جنسی
that you had a clitoris, though,
که تو دارای کلیتوریس هستی،
would moan like, "Oh! Oh!"
and their damned clitoris.
supposed to do with her life?
"Oh! Oh!" and all of that.
and said to my mom,
I deserve pleasure,
می گویند من سزاوار لذت بردن هستم"
how to find the clitoris."
کلیتوریس یک زن را پیدا کند.
have a problem finding the clitoris.
It was Dolly that said that.
I had an inner joke in my head
(Laughter)
( خنده تماشاگران)
I deserve pleasure, and do you know
what you have denied me?
چه چیزی را حاشا می کنی؟
in the most sacred way.
"Who is Dolly and Girlfriend?
That's a magazine, mom, a magazine."
not having a clitoris was the norm.
نداشتن کلیتوریس عادی بود.
that was very clitoris-centric.
که کلیتوریس محوریت داشت.
this strange phase of anger
این فازعجیب غریب از عصبانیت
an appointment with my therapist.
who has a therapist. There you go.
که یک رواشناس دارد. بفرمائید.
and discrimination,
and then there it was."
و سپس این گفتگو."
I'm not a woman
the sexuality of women.
any sexual desire.
not feeling like having sex,
around the age of 14,
normal periods because of FGM.
and they were very painful.
sitting there.
have children, Khadija."
an angry black woman.
no matter what your may defense may be" --
مهم نیست که تو چگونه از خودت دفاع می کنی"--
is harming me, and it's hurting me.
تو به من آسیب رساندی و صدمه زدی.
as a mother."
for an apology, by the way.
"You can't have kids."
"تو نمی توانی بچه دار شوی."
Is this what life is all about?"
آیا زندگی این هست؟ "
who have gone through FGM
incontinence, constant infections, pain.
عفونت و درد دارد.
because I was born a girl
در مکان نادرست
all that pain, into advocacy
to be worth something.
called No FGM Australia.
Child Protective Services,
is planning on performing FGM on her.
I'll let that sink in: four years old.
می گذارم او در آنجا بماند: کودک چهار ساله.
who is married to a Malaysian man.
که با یک مرد مالزیایی ازدواج کرده بود.
he was going to take their daughters
to cut off their clitoris.
He said they were dirty.
شوهرش گفته بود اینها کثیف هستند
where she said to him,
will you do that to my daughters."
تا این بلا را بر سر دختران مان بیاوری."
wasn't aware of what FGM was,
flown over to Malaysia
changed for the rest of their lives.
with an issue like that?
performed on them.
It's not a Middle Eastern problem.
این مشکل خاورمیانه نیست.
it has no color, it's everybody's problem.
رنگی در آن نیست، این مشکل همه هست.
a right to sexual pleasure.
a right to our bodies.
and you know what? Bullshit.
می دانید چرا؟ کثافت است.
I'm doing my part in ending FGM.
که برای پایان دادن به ختنه وظیفه خودم را انجام می دهم.
who is at risk of FGM.
که در خطر ختنه شدن باشند.
who comes to your hospital
because of a culture.
a defense for child abuse.
to see FGM as an issue for you.
برای شما به عنوان یک مشکل ببینم.
your sister, your cousin.
and it'll come up, and sign it.
for FGM victims in Australia
growing up here
has a right to pleasure.
to their bodies being left intact,
has a right to a clitoris.
and women to do nothing."
of female genital mutilation
that it ends in my generation.
تا این در نسل من خاتمه یابد.
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Khadija Gbla - Cross-cultural consultantKhadija Gbla was born in Sierra Leone, spent her youth in Gambia, and as a teenager put down roots in Australia. She uses her cross-cultural heritage to promote understanding in both directions.
Why you should listen
Khadija Gbla was just 3-years-old when the war broke out in her country, Sierra Leone. While her family initially escaped to Gambia, 10 years later they attained refugee status and resettled in Adelaide, Australia. The transition was complex—Khadija experienced racism, illness and depression—but threw herself into her education. She discovered that she had a unique talent: the ability to translate across two very different cultures.
Khadija first used this talent as a peer educator for South Australia’s Women’s Heath Statewide program, where she talked to health professionals about female genital mutilation — helping them understand what it is, where it happens, and the cultural beliefs that surround it. She’s since used her multicultural voice to offer advice on policy through South Australian Government Minister’s Youth Council, to organize camps and activities for newly-arrived refugees and to raise awareness about both sexual and mental health issues among her peers. She has represented Australia in the international arena at the Harvard National Model United Nations, Commonwealth Youth Forum and Australian and Africa Dialogue, and speaks regularly at a wide variety of events to make sure that her perspective is heard.
Khadija Gbla | Speaker | TED.com