Khadija Gbla: My mother’s strange definition of empowerment
Kadidža Gbla (Khadija Gbla): Čudna definicija osnaživanja moje majke
Khadija Gbla was born in Sierra Leone, spent her youth in Gambia, and as a teenager put down roots in Australia. She uses her cross-cultural heritage to promote understanding in both directions. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
my personal journey
prekrstite noge,
the things your body does.
on me, by the way.
well, that's in Sierra Leone as well.
to je takođe u Sijera Leoneu.
I was checked before I got here.
pre nego što sam došla ovde.
čoveku treba više od jedne žene.
needs more than one wife.
više od jedne žene?
that's what I say.
in Sierra Leone in 1991.
u Sijera Leoneu 1991. godine.
one night, everything was good.
otišla u krevet, sve je bilo dobro.
to kill me and my family.
da ubiju mene i moju porodicu.
in Gambia, in West Africa.
u zapadnoj Africi.
Držite se podalje odatle.
was going to become of us.
za status izbeglice.
jednog dana i rekla:
a little holiday, a little trip."
and ended up in a bush
away from us into a second hut.
I don't know what's going on."
Ne znam šta se dešava."
to get her off me, but I couldn't.
sa sebe, ali nisam mogla.
with a rusty-looking knife,
sa nožem koji je izgledao zarđalo,
water or sunlight before.
niti svetlost dana.
to be my clitoris,
da je bio moj klitoris,
and started cutting away, inch by inch.
i počela da seče, komad po komad.
so this pain will stop,
da bi bol prestao,
for what felt like forever,
činilo se, čitavu večnost,
across the floor
she's ever touched.
koju je ikada dodirnula.
and left me there bleeding,
i ostavile me tu da krvarim,
as to what just happened.
što se upravo dogodilo.
that we were coming to Australia,
da idemo u Australiju,
the Sydney Olympics at the time,
Olimpijske igre u Sidneju,
to the end of the world,
da idemo na kraj sveta,
to go after Australia.
posle Australije.
and then Singapore.
i onda Singapur.
opening the tap like this.
uključujući česmu ovako.
in Adelaide, that's what I would say.
tako bih ja rekla.
u Randl tržni centar.
You must take us back to Australia."
Morate da nas vratite u Australiju."
there were a lot of Asians in Australia
da ima mnogo Azijata u Australiji
because they were less racist.
jer su one manje rasistički naklonjene.
that publication. (Laughter)
(Smeh)
and I was the only black child there.
a ja sam bila jedino crno dete tamo.
with a bit of a color on me.
sa malo boje na sebi.
to be under the sun.
da budu pod suncem.
though. Not the same.
Nije bilo isto.
je bilo prilično teško,
volunteering for an organization
da volontiram za organizaciju
female genital mutilation program
genitalnog sakaćenja žena
this program was actually about,
o čemu je program zapravo,
na bilo koji način.
nurses and doctors
medicinske sestre i doktore
and now, Australia and London and America,
i sada i u Australiji, Londonu i Americi,
we live in a multicultural society,
živimo u multikulturalnom društvu,
come with their culture,
dolaze sa svojom kulturom,
that we may not agree with,
sa kojima se možemo ne slagati,
of female genital mutilation,
sakaćenja ženskih genitalija.
they cut off the whole clitoris
or your outer lips,
ili spoljnih usmina,
cut off the whole clitoris
to pee and have your period.
da piškite i da imate menstuaciju.
I pretty much had amnesia.
uglavnom sam imala amneziju.
and traumatized by what had happened,
i traumatizovana time što se dogodilo,
happened to me,
da mi se dogodilo nešto loše,
of what had happened.
na to šta se dogodilo.
had a scar down there.
it all came back to me.
sve mi se vratilo.
holding me down.
koja me je držala.
what was done to me was a terrible thing
ono što mi je učinjeno užasna stvar
it was called circumcision,
da se zove obrezivanje,
I'm a mutilated person.
Ja sam osakaćena osoba.
(Laughter)
upirati prstom na svoju majku,
pointing at your mother,
talking about, Khadija?"
You circumcised me.
ti si me obrezala.
that belonged to me."
and I did it to you.
i ja sam uradila tebi.
get itchy down there?"
bi me zasvrbelo tamo dole?"
if you were not circumcised,
get itchy all the time.
to sleep around with anybody."
was very strange. (Laughter)
je vrlo čudna. (Smeh)
of our first conversation.
Dolly and Girlfriend magazines.
časopise Doli i Drugarica.
Anybody remember those sealed sections?
Da li se iko seća tih zatvorenih odeljaka?
(Laughter)
an article about pleasure
članak o zadovoljstvu
that you had a clitoris, though,
da imate klitoris,
would moan like, "Oh! Oh!"
i te žene bi stenjale: "Ah! Ah!"
and their damned clitoris.
i njihov prokleti klitoris.
supposed to do with her life?
treba da uradi sa svojim životom?
"Oh! Oh!" and all of that.
"Ah! Ah!" i tako to.
and said to my mom,
i rekla mami:
I deserve pleasure,
da zaslužujem zadovoljstvo,
how to find the clitoris."
treba da otkriju kako da nađu klitoris."
have a problem finding the clitoris.
da pronađu klitoris.
It was Dolly that said that.
Doli je to rekla.
I had an inner joke in my head
imala sam unutrašnju šalu u glavi
(Laughter)
(Smeh)
I deserve pleasure, and do you know
da zaslužujem zadovoljstvo, i da li znaš
what you have denied me?
in the most sacred way.
"Who is Dolly and Girlfriend?
"Ko su Doli i Drugarica?
tvoji novi prijatelji, Kadidža?"
That's a magazine, mom, a magazine."
To je časopis, mama, časopis."
not having a clitoris was the norm.
bilo je pravilo nemati klitoris.
that was very clitoris-centric.
koje je bilo veoma klitoris-centrično.
this strange phase of anger
an appointment with my therapist.
sastanak sa terapeutom.
who has a therapist. There you go.
koji ima terapeuta. Eto.
and discrimination,
sa rasizmom i diskriminacijom,
and then there it was."
a onda je to usledilo"
I'm not a woman
kao da nisam žena
the sexuality of women.
da se kontroliše seksualnost žena.
any sexual desire.
not feeling like having sex,
živeti bez želje za seksom,
around the age of 14,
da dobijam menstruaciju oko 14. godine,
normal periods because of FGM.
normalne menstruacije zbog SŽG.
and they were very painful.
i bile su vrlo bolne.
sitting there.
have children, Khadija."
da imaš decu, Kadidža."
an angry black woman.
no matter what your may defense may be" --
bez obzira kakvo bilo tvoje opravdanje" -
da je to uradila iz ljubavi -
is harming me, and it's hurting me.
mi škodi, i povređuje me.
as a mother."
šta sam morala da uradim kao majka."
for an apology, by the way.
"You can't have kids."
"Ne možeš da imaš dece."
Is this what life is all about?"
da li je ovo moja egzistencija?
who have gone through FGM
koje su prošle kroz SŽG
incontinence, constant infections, pain.
inkontinenciju, stalne infekcije, bol.
because I was born a girl
jer sam se rodila kao devojčica
all that pain, into advocacy
u advokaturu
to be worth something.
da moj bol vredi nečemu.
called No FGM Australia.
po imenu "Ne SŽG-u u Australiji".
Child Protective Services,
službu za zaštitu dece,
is planning on performing FGM on her.
I'll let that sink in: four years old.
Da ponovim: ima četiri godine.
who is married to a Malaysian man.
koja je udata za čoveka sa Malezije.
he was going to take their daughters
i rekao da će odvesti njihove ćerke
to cut off their clitoris.
He said they were dirty.
Rekao je da su prljave.
u mojoj kulturi."
where she said to him,
u kojoj mu je rekla:
will you do that to my daughters."
ćeš to uraditi mojim ćerkama."
wasn't aware of what FGM was,
nije bila svesna toga šta je SŽG,
flown over to Malaysia
changed for the rest of their lives.
with an issue like that?
da se borimo sa takvim problemom?
performed on them.
da SŽG bude izvršeno nad njima.
It's not a Middle Eastern problem.
Nije problem Srednjeg Istoka.
it has no color, it's everybody's problem.
nema boju, to je svačiji problem.
a right to sexual pleasure.
na seksualno zadovoljstvo.
a right to our bodies.
and you know what? Bullshit.
I'm doing my part in ending FGM.
da imam udela u okončanju SŽG.
who is at risk of FGM.
koje je pod rizikom od SŽG.
who comes to your hospital
koji dolazi u vašu bolnicu
because of a culture.
a defense for child abuse.
za zlostavljanje dece.
to see FGM as an issue for you.
vidi SŽG kao problem za sebe.
your sister, your cousin.
sestra, rođaka.
molim vas da mi se pridružite.
and it'll come up, and sign it.
izaći će, i potpišite je.
for FGM victims in Australia
za žrtve SŽG u Australiji
growing up here
koje ovde odrastaju
has a right to pleasure.
to their bodies being left intact,
da njegovo telo ostane netaknuto,
has a right to a clitoris.
ima pravo na klitoris.
u okončanju ovog čina.
and women to do nothing."
of female genital mutilation
sakaćenja ženskih genitalija
that it ends in my generation.
sa mojom generacijom.
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Khadija Gbla - Cross-cultural consultantKhadija Gbla was born in Sierra Leone, spent her youth in Gambia, and as a teenager put down roots in Australia. She uses her cross-cultural heritage to promote understanding in both directions.
Why you should listen
Khadija Gbla was just 3-years-old when the war broke out in her country, Sierra Leone. While her family initially escaped to Gambia, 10 years later they attained refugee status and resettled in Adelaide, Australia. The transition was complex—Khadija experienced racism, illness and depression—but threw herself into her education. She discovered that she had a unique talent: the ability to translate across two very different cultures.
Khadija first used this talent as a peer educator for South Australia’s Women’s Heath Statewide program, where she talked to health professionals about female genital mutilation — helping them understand what it is, where it happens, and the cultural beliefs that surround it. She’s since used her multicultural voice to offer advice on policy through South Australian Government Minister’s Youth Council, to organize camps and activities for newly-arrived refugees and to raise awareness about both sexual and mental health issues among her peers. She has represented Australia in the international arena at the Harvard National Model United Nations, Commonwealth Youth Forum and Australian and Africa Dialogue, and speaks regularly at a wide variety of events to make sure that her perspective is heard.
Khadija Gbla | Speaker | TED.com