TEDxWomen 2011
Jane Fonda: Life's third act
Džejn Fonda: Treća epoha u životu
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Ova generacija se očekuje da živi 30 godina duže i ove godine nisu samo napomena ili patologija. Na TEDxWomen konferenciji, Džejn Fonda postavlja pitanje o načinu na koji možemo razmišljati o novoj fazi u našim životima.
Jane Fonda - Actor and activist
Jane Fonda has had three extraordinary careers (so far): Oscar-winning actor, fitness guru, impassioned activist. Full bio
Jane Fonda has had three extraordinary careers (so far): Oscar-winning actor, fitness guru, impassioned activist. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
00:15
There have been many revolutions
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Došlo je do mnogo revolucija
00:17
over the last century,
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tokom poslednjeg veka,
00:19
but perhaps none as significant
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ali, možda, ni jedna nije toliko značajna
00:21
as the longevity revolution.
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koliko revolucija za produžetak naših života.
00:24
We are living on average today
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Danas živimo prosečno 34 godine
00:26
34 years longer than our great-grandparents did.
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duže od naših pradedova.
00:29
Think about that.
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Razmislite o tome.
00:31
That's an entire second adult lifetime
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To je još čitav jedan period zrelosti,
00:34
that's been added to our lifespan.
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dodat našem životnom dobu.
00:36
And yet, for the most part,
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A, pak, naša kultura većinom
00:38
our culture has not come to terms with what this means.
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nije shvatila šta to znači.
00:41
We're still living with the old paradigm
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I dalje živimo u staroj paradigmi
00:44
of age as an arch.
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da je starenje kao luk.
00:46
That's the metaphor, the old metaphor.
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To je metafora, stara metafora.
00:48
You're born, you peak at midlife
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Rodite se, budete na vrhuncu života u srednjim godinama
00:50
and decline into decrepitude.
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i potom kvalitet života opada.
00:52
(Laughter)
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(Smeh)
00:54
Age as pathology.
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Starost kao patologija.
00:56
But many people today --
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Ali mnogi ljudi danas,
00:58
philosophers, artists, doctors, scientists --
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filozofi, umetnici, doktori, naučnici,
01:01
are taking a new look at what I call the third act,
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zauzimaju drugačiji stav o onome što ja zovem trećom epohom,
01:04
the last three decades of life.
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poslednje tri decenije života.
01:07
They realize that this is actually a developmental stage of life
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Oni shvataju da je ovo zapravo razvojna faza života
01:12
with its own significance --
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sa sopstvenim značajem
01:14
as different from midlife
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različitim od perioda srednjih godina,
01:17
as adolescence is from childhood.
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koliko je adolescencija različita od detinjstva.
01:20
And they are asking -- we should all be asking --
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I oni se pitaju, trebalo bi svi to da se pitamo,
01:23
how do we use this time?
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kako da iskoristimo to vreme?
01:26
How do we live it successfully?
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Kako da ga živimo sa uspehom?
01:28
What is the appropriate new metaphor
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Koja je adekvatna nova metafora
01:30
for aging?
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za starenje?
01:32
I've spent the last year researching and writing about this subject.
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Prošlu godinu sam provela istražujući i pišući na ovu temu.
01:35
And I have come to find
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Shvatila sam da je više
01:37
that a more appropriate metaphor for aging
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odgovarajuća metafora za starenje
01:41
is a staircase --
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stepenište,
01:43
the upward ascension of the human spirit,
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uspon ljudskog duha
01:47
bringing us into wisdom, wholeness
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koji nam daje mudrost, osećaj celosti
01:49
and authenticity.
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i verodostojnost.
01:51
Age not at all as pathology;
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Starost uopšte nije patologija,
01:53
age as potential.
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već potencijal.
01:55
And guess what?
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I znate šta? Ovaj potencijal
01:57
This potential is not for the lucky few.
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nije samo za nekolicinu srećnika.
01:59
It turns out,
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Ispostavlja se
02:01
most people over 50
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da se većina ljudi preko 50
02:03
feel better, are less stressed,
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oseća bolje, sa manje stresa,
02:05
are less hostile, less anxious.
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manje je neprijateljsko nastrojeno, manje nervozno.
02:07
We tend to see commonalities
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Navikli smo da gledamo istovetnosti,
02:09
more than differences.
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više nego razlike.
02:11
Some of the studies even say
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Neke od studija čak kažu
02:13
we're happier.
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da smo srećniji.
02:15
This is not what I expected, trust me.
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To nisam očekivala, verujte mi.
02:17
I come from a long line of depressives.
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Dolazim iz duge loze depresivaca.
02:20
As I was approaching my late 40s,
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Kako su mi se približavale kasne 40-e,
02:22
when I would wake up in the morning
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kako bih se probudila ujutru,
02:24
my first six thoughts would all be negative.
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prvih šest misli su mi bile negativne.
02:26
And I got scared.
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I uplašila sam se.
02:28
I thought, oh my gosh.
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Pomislila sam, o, moj bože!
02:30
I'm going to become a crotchety old lady.
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Postaću mrgodna, gunđava baba.
02:32
But now that I am actually smack-dab in the middle of my own third act,
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Ali sada kada sam baš u sred svoje treće epohe,
02:36
I realize I've never been happier.
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shvatam da nikada nisam bila srećnija.
02:39
I have such a powerful feeling of well-being.
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Okružuje me snažan osećaj blagostanja.
02:44
And I've discovered
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Otkrila sam da
02:46
that when you're inside oldness,
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kada ste unutar starosti,
02:48
as opposed to looking at it from the outside,
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umesto da je samo posmatrate,
02:50
fear subsides.
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strah nestane.
02:52
You realize, you're still yourself --
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Shvatite da ste još uvek svoji,
02:54
maybe even more so.
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možda i više nego ranije.
02:56
Picasso once said, "It takes a long time to become young."
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Pikaso je jednom rekao: "Potrebno je mnogo vremena da biste postali mladi."
03:00
(Laughter)
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(Smeh)
03:02
I don't want to romanticize aging.
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Ne želim da romantizujem starenje.
03:04
Obviously, there's no guarantee
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Očigledno, nema garancije
03:06
that it can be a time of fruition and growth.
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da će biti vreme stvaranja i razvoja.
03:08
Some of it is a matter of luck.
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Jednim delom, zavisi od sreće.
03:10
Some of it, obviously, is genetic.
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Drugim, očigledno, od genetike.
03:13
One third of it, in fact, is genetic.
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Jedna trećina je zapravo genetička.
03:15
And there isn't much we can do about that.
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I tim povodom ne možemo mnogo toga da uradimo.
03:18
But that means that two-thirds
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Ali to znači da možemo da utičemo
03:20
of how well we do in the third act,
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na dve trećine toga koliko ćemo dobro
03:22
we can do something about.
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da prođemo u trećoj epohi.
03:25
We're going to discuss what we can do
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Porazgovaraćemo o tome šta možemo da uradimo
03:28
to make these added years really successful
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da učinimo ove dodate godine uspešnim
03:31
and use them to make a difference.
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i iskoristimo ih da nešto promenimo.
03:34
Now let me say something about the staircase,
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Sada dozvolite da kažem nešto o stepeništu,
03:36
which may seem like an odd metaphor for seniors
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koje može delovati kao čudna metafora za starije
03:40
given the fact that many seniors are challenged by stairs.
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zbog činjenice da većini stepenice predstavljaju izazov.
03:43
(Laughter)
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(Smeh)
03:45
Myself included.
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Uključujući mene.
03:48
As you may know,
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Kao što možda znate
03:50
the entire world operates on a universal law:
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ceo svet se zasniva na univerzalnom zakonu,
03:53
entropy, the second law of thermodynamics.
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entropiji, drugom zakonu termo dinamike.
03:57
Entropy means that everything in the world, everything,
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Entropija znači da je sve u svetu, sve,
04:00
is in a state of decline and decay,
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u stanju opadanja i raspadanja,
04:02
the arch.
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u vidu luka.
04:04
There's only one exception to this universal law,
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Postoji samo jedan izuzetak kod ovog zakona,
04:07
and that is the human spirit,
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a to je ljudski duh,
04:09
which can continue to evolve upwards --
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koji može nastaviti da evoluira naviše,
04:12
the staircase --
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kao stepenište,
04:14
bringing us into wholeness,
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donoseći nam blagostanje,
04:16
authenticity and wisdom.
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verodostojnost i mudrost.
04:19
And here's an example of what I mean.
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I evo primera za ono na šta mislim.
04:21
This upward ascension
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Ovo penjanje
04:23
can happen even in the face of extreme physical challenges.
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se može desiti čak i usled ekstremnih fizičkih izazova.
04:27
About three years ago,
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Pre oko tri godine,
04:29
I read an article in the New York Times.
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pročitala sam članak u Njujork Tajmsu.
04:31
It was about a man named Neil Selinger --
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Radilo se o čoveku po imenu Nejl Selindžer,
04:33
57 years old, a retired lawyer --
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57 godina, advokat u penziji,
04:36
who had joined the writers group at Sarah Lawrence
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koji se pridružio grupi pisaca Sare Lorens
04:39
where he found his writer's voice.
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gde je pronašao svoju sklonost ka pisanju.
04:42
Two years later,
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Nakon dve godine,
04:44
he was diagnosed with ALS, commonly known as Lou Gehrig's disease.
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postavljena mu je dijagnoza vrsta skleroze, poznata kao Lu Gerigova bolest.
04:47
It's a terrible disease. It's fatal.
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To je strašna bolest. Fatalna.
04:50
It wastes the body, but the mind remains intact.
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Uništava telo, dok um ostaje netaknut.
04:54
In this article, Mr. Selinger wrote the following
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U svoj članku, g-din Selindžer je napisao sledeće
04:57
to describe what was happening to him.
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da opiše šta mu se desilo.
05:00
And I quote,
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Citiram:
05:03
"As my muscles weakened,
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"Kako mi mišići slabe,
05:05
my writing became stronger.
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moje pisanje postaje izražajnije.
05:08
As I slowly lost my speech,
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Kako sam polako izgubio moć govora,
05:11
I gained my voice.
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dobio sam svoj glas,
05:14
As I diminished, I grew.
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Kako sam nestajao, rastao sam,
05:16
As I lost so much,
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Kako sam izgubio toliko toga,
05:18
I finally started to find myself."
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napokon sam počeo da se pronalazim."
05:22
Neil Selinger, to me,
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Nejl Selindžer je za mene
05:24
is the embodiment of mounting the staircase
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otelovljenje penjanja uz stepenice
05:27
in his third act.
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u trećoj epohi.
05:30
Now we're all born with spirit, all of us,
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Svi smo rođeni sa duhom, svi među nama,
05:32
but sometimes it gets tamped down
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ali se ponekad on izgubi
05:35
beneath the challenges of life,
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pod izazovima života,
05:37
violence, abuse, neglect.
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nasiljem, zloupotrebom, nemarnošću.
05:40
Perhaps our parents suffered from depression.
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Možda su naši roditelji patili od depresije.
05:42
Perhaps they weren't able to love us
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Možda nisu bili sposobni da nas vole
05:44
beyond how we performed in the world.
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više od toga koliko smo zaslužili.
05:48
Perhaps we still suffer
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Možda još uvek imamo
05:50
from a psychic pain, a wound.
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psihički bol, ranu.
05:52
Perhaps we feel that many of our relationships have not had closure.
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Možda osećamo da mnogi naši odnosi nisu dorečeni.
05:56
And so we can feel unfinished.
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I zbog toga se možemo osećati nedovršeno.
06:00
Perhaps the task of the third act
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Možda je zadatak treće epohe
06:03
is to finish up the task of finishing ourselves.
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da završimo zadatak završavanja sebe.
06:08
For me, it began as I was approaching my third act,
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Za mene je to počelo kada sam se približavala trećoj epohi,
06:12
my 60th birthday.
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na moj 60. rođendan.
06:14
How was I supposed to live it?
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Kako je trebalo da živim?
06:16
What was I supposed to accomplish in this final act?
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Šta je trebalo da postignem u ovom finalnom dobu?
06:19
And I realized that, in order to know where I was going,
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I shvatila sam da, da bih znala kuda idem,
06:23
I had to know where I'd been.
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morala sam da znam gde sam bila.
06:25
And so I went back
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I tako sam otišla nazad
06:27
and I studied my first two acts,
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i studirala svoje prve dve epohe,
06:29
trying to see who I was then,
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pokušavajući da vidim ko sam bila tada
06:32
who I really was --
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ko sam stvarno bila,
06:34
not who my parents or other people told me I was,
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a ne ko su mi roditelji ili drugi ljudi rekli da sam bila,
06:37
or treated me like I was.
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ili kako su se ophodili prema meni.
06:39
But who was I? Who were my parents --
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Ali ko sam bila? Ko su bili moji roditelji,
06:41
not as parents, but as people?
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ne kao roditelji, već kao ljudi?
06:44
Who were my grandparents?
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Ko su bili moje bake i deke?
06:46
How did they treat my parents?
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Kako su se oni ophodili prema mojim roditeljima?
06:48
These kinds of things.
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Takve stvari.
06:51
I discovered a couple of years later
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Posle dve godine sam saznala
06:54
that this process that I had gone through
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da se ovaj proces
06:57
is called by psychologists
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u psihologiji naziva
06:59
"doing a life review."
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"revizija života".
07:01
And they say it can give new significance
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I kažu da može dati novi značaj
07:03
and clarity and meaning
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i jasnu sliku i značenje
07:05
to a person's life.
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životu čoveka.
07:07
You may discover, as I did,
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Možete otkriti, kao ja,
07:10
that a lot of things that you used to think were your fault,
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da je mnogo stvari za koje ste mislili da su vaša krivica,
07:13
a lot of things you used to think about yourself,
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da mnogo stvari koje ste mislili o sebi
07:16
really had nothing to do with you.
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nije imalo veze sa vama.
07:19
It wasn't your fault; you're just fine.
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Nisu bile vaša krivica, vi ste u redu.
07:22
And you're able to go back
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I možete da se vratite
07:24
and forgive them
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i oprostite im
07:26
and forgive yourself.
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i oprostite sebi.
07:28
You're able to free yourself
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Možete da se oslobodite
07:31
from your past.
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svoje prošlosti.
07:33
You can work to change
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Možete raditi na promeni
07:35
your relationship to your past.
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svog odnosa prema svojoj prošlosti.
07:37
Now while I was writing about this,
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Dok sam pisala o ovome, naišla sam
07:39
I came upon a book called "Man's Search for Meaning"
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na knjigu "Čovekova potraga za značenjem"
07:42
by Viktor Frankl.
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Viktora Frankla.
07:44
Viktor Frankl was a German psychiatrist
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Viktor Frankl je bio nemački psihijatar
07:47
who'd spent five years in a Nazi concentration camp.
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koji je proveo pet godina u nacističkom koncentracionom logoru.
07:50
And he wrote that, while he was in the camp,
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I napisao je, dok je bio u logoru,
07:53
he could tell, should they ever be released,
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da je mogao da predvidi, ukoliko ikada budu slobodni,
07:57
which of the people would be okay
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koji čovek će biti dobro,
07:59
and which would not.
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a koji neće.
08:01
And he wrote this:
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I napisao je ovo:
08:06
"Everything you have in life can be taken from you
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"Sve što imate u životu može vam biti oduzeto,
08:09
except one thing,
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sem jedne stvari,
08:11
your freedom to choose
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vaše slobode na izbor
08:13
how you will respond
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kako da se nosite
08:15
to the situation.
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sa situacijom.
08:17
This is what determines
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Ovo određuje
08:19
the quality of the life we've lived --
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kvalitet života koji živimo,
08:21
not whether we've been rich or poor,
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a ne da li smo rođeni bogati ili siromašni,
08:23
famous or unknown,
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poznati ili nepoznati,
08:25
healthy or suffering.
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zdravi ili bolesni.
08:27
What determines our quality of life
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Ono što određuje kvalitet naših života
08:30
is how we relate to these realities,
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je kako doživljavamo realnost,
08:33
what kind of meaning we assign them,
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koje im značenje prisvajamo,
08:35
what kind of attitude we cling to about them,
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kakav stav zauzimamo,
08:38
what state of mind we allow them to trigger."
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koje stanje uma im dozvoljavamo da aktiviraju."
08:42
Perhaps the central purpose of the third act
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Možda je glavna svrha treće epohe
08:45
is to go back and to try, if appropriate,
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da se vratimo i da pokušamo, ukoliko možemo,
08:49
to change our relationship
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da promenimo naš odnos
08:51
to the past.
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prema prošlosti.
08:53
It turns out that cognitive research shows
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Ispostavlja se da kognitivna istraživanja pokazuju
08:56
when we are able to do this,
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kada smo sposobni to da uradimo,
08:58
it manifests neurologically --
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to se pokazuje neurološki,
09:01
neural pathways are created in the brain.
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nervni putevi se stvaraju u mozgu.
09:04
You see, if you have, over time,
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Vidite, ako ste, vremenom.
09:06
reacted negatively to past events and people,
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negativno reagovali na prošle događaje i ljude,
09:09
neural pathways are laid down
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nervni putevi su utabani
09:12
by chemical and electrical signals that are sent through the brain.
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hemijskim i električnim signalima koji se šalju kroz mozak.
09:15
And over time, these neural pathways become hardwired,
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I, vremenom, ovakvi nervni putevi ostaju ukorenjeni
09:18
they become the norm --
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postanu norma,
09:20
even if it's bad for us
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iako su loši po nas,
09:22
because it causes us stress and anxiety.
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jer uzrokuju stres i anksioznost,
09:25
If however,
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Ako pak,
09:27
we can go back and alter our relationship,
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uspemo da se vratimo i promenimo naš odnos,
09:31
re-vision our relationship
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Uradimo reviziju našeg odnosa
09:33
to past people and events,
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prema prošlosti i događajima,
09:35
neural pathways can change.
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nervni putevi se mogu promeniti.
09:37
And if we can maintain
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Možemo da zadržimo
09:39
the more positive feelings about the past,
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pozitivnija osećanja u vezi prošlosti,
09:42
that becomes the new norm.
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koja postanu nova norma.
09:44
It's like resetting a thermostat.
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Kao resetovanje termostata.
09:47
It's not having experiences
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Ne čini nas mudrijim
09:50
that make us wise,
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proživljeno,
09:53
it's reflecting on the experiences that we've had
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već nas analiziranje prošlih iskustava
09:57
that makes us wise --
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čini mudrima
09:59
and that helps us become whole,
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i to nam pomaže da budemo celi,
10:01
brings wisdom and authenticity.
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donosi nam mudrost i verodostojnost.
10:03
It helps us become what we might have been.
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Pomaže nam da postanemo ono što smo možda mogli biti.
10:07
Women start off whole, don't we?
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Žene počinju kao celina, zar ne?
10:09
I mean, as girls, we start off feisty -- "Yeah, who says?"
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Mislim, kao žene, mi smo žestoke. "Da, ko kaže?"
10:12
We have agency.
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Mi imamo sredstva.
10:14
We are the subjects of our own lives.
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Mi smo subjekti naših života.
10:16
But very often,
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Ali veoma često
10:18
many, if not most of us, when we hit puberty,
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mnogo, ako ne većina nas, kada uđemo u pubertet,
10:21
we start worrying about fitting in and being popular.
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počnemo da se brinemo o uklapanju i popularnosti.
10:24
And we become the subjects and objects of other people's lives.
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I postanemo predmeti života drugih ljudi.
10:28
But now, in our third acts,
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Ali sada, u našoj trećoj epohi,
10:31
it may be possible
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moguće je da
10:33
for us to circle back to where we started
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okrenemo krug unazad
10:36
and know it for the first time.
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i znamo to po prvi put.
10:38
And if we can do that,
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I ako možemo to da uradimo,
10:41
it will not just be for ourselves.
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neće više biti samo za nas.
10:44
Older women
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Starije žene
10:46
are the largest demographic in the world.
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su najveća demografija u svetu;
10:48
If we can go back and redefine ourselves
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ukoliko uspemo da odemo unazad i redefinišemo sebe
10:51
and become whole,
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i postanemo cele
10:53
this will create a cultural shift in the world,
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to može napraviti kulturološki pomeraj u svetu
10:58
and it will give an example to younger generations
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i dati primer mlađim generacijama
11:01
so that they can reconceive their own lifespan.
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da i one mogu da istraže svoj životni okvir.
11:04
Thank you very much.
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Hvala vam puno!
11:06
(Applause)
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(Aplauz)
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Jane Fonda - Actor and activistJane Fonda has had three extraordinary careers (so far): Oscar-winning actor, fitness guru, impassioned activist.
Why you should listen
Jane Fonda is an actor, author, producer and activist supporting environmental issues, peace and female empowerment. She founded the Georgia Campaign for Adolescent Pregnancy Prevention, and established the Jane Fonda Center for Adolescent Reproductive Health at Emory. She cofounded the Women’s Media Center, and sits on the board of V-Day, a global effort to stop violence against women and girls.
Fonda's remarkable screen and stage career includes two Best Actress Oscars, an Emmy, a Tony Award nomination and an Honorary Palme d’Or from the Cannes Film Festival. Offstage, she revolutionized the fitness industry in the 1980s with Jane Fonda’s Workout — the all-time top-grossing home video. She has written a best-selling memoir, My Life So Far, and Prime Time, a comprehensive guide to living life to the fullest.
Jane Fonda | Speaker | TED.com