Celeste Headlee: 10 ways to have a better conversation
Celeste Headlee: 10 tipů pro lepší konverzaci
Celeste Headlee's years of interview experience give her a unique perspective on what makes for a good conversation. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
unfriended someone on Facebook
někoho z přátel na Facebooku,
about politics or religion,
o politice nebo náboženství,
know at least one person that you avoid
jednu osobu, které se vyhýbáte,
to talk to them?
to have a polite conversation,
že abyste měli slušnou konverzaci,
of Henry Higgins in "My Fair Lady":
Henryho Higginse z "My Fair Lady":
and anti-vaxxing, those subjects --
a hnutím proti vakcínám -
to devolve into an argument,
can't speak to one another
mluvit jeden s druhým,
for it and against it, it's not normal.
tento svět není normální.
of 10,000 American adults,
na 10 000 dospělých Američanů
we are more polarized,
not listening to each other.
who our friends are going to be,
we're not listening to each other.
že se navzájem neposloucháme.
between talking and listening,
mezi mluvením a posloucháním
we lost that balance.
tak nějak ztratili.
either have in your hands
grab them really quickly.
abyste na ně mohli rychle dosáhnout.
send more than a hundred texts a day.
denně více než 100 zpráv.
are more likely to text their friends
pošle svým kamarádům zprávu,
to them face to face.
byl skvělý článek.
named Paul Barnwell.
učitel Paul Barnwell -
a communication project.
komunikační projekt.
on a specific subject without using notes.
tématu, aniž by používali poznámky.
that conversational competence
že schopnost konverzace
most overlooked skill we fail to teach.
kterou nezvládáme učit.
with ideas and each other through screens,
zabývají idejemi a sebou navzájem,
communications skills.
komunikační dovednosti.
but we have to ask ourselves:
musíme se sami sebe ptát:
coherent, confident conversation?"
udržet souvislou, sebevědomou konverzaci?"
s řidiči náklaďáků,
I talk to people that I don't like.
Mluvím s lidmi, které nemám ráda.
deeply on a personal level.
se kterými nesouhlasím na osobní úrovni.
a great conversation with them.
or so teaching you how to talk
příštích zhruba 10 minut učit jak mluvit
a lot of advice on this,
spousty rad na toto téma.
to discuss in advance,
that you're paying attention,
abyste ukázali, že dáváte pozor,
or summarize it.
how to show you're paying attention
jak ukázat, že dáváte pozor,
same skills as a professional interviewer
používám naprosto tytéž dovednosti,
how to interview people,
jak dělat rozhovory s lidmi
learn how to be better conversationalists.
zlepšit se v konverzaci.
without getting bored,
nebo se nudit,
without offending anybody.
We know what it's like.
Víme, jaké to je.
walk away feeling engaged and inspired,
se cítíte zaujatí a inspirovaní
like you've made a real connection
can't be like that.
většina vašich interakcí.
I'm going to walk you through all of them,
Provedu vás všemi,
one of them and master it,
kdybyste zvládli jen jedno
just set down your cell phone
or whatever is in your hand.
nebo cokoliv máte v ruce.
you had with your boss.
co jste měli se svým šéfem.
you're going to have for dinner.
co budete mít k večeři.
of the conversation,
and half out of it.
a tou druhou mimo.
or argument or pushback or growth,
nebo diskuzi, opačný názor nebo poučení,
why I don't allow pundits on my show:
do své show nezvu politické experty:
hate Obama and food stamps and abortion.
Obamu, potravinové lístky a potraty.
ropné korporace a Dicka Cheneyho.
and Dick Cheney.
assuming that you have something to learn.
že se z ní něco můžete naučit.
a setting aside of oneself.
odložit sama sebe stranou.
setting aside your personal opinion.
odložit stranou váš osobní názor.
less and less vulnerable
to open up the inner recesses
že posluchači otevře
something to learn.
že se máte co naučit.
knows something that you don't."
"Každý, koho potkáte, zná něco, co vy ne."
what, when, where, why or how.
co, kdy, kde, proč nebo jak.
you're going to get a simple answer out.
dostanete na ní jednoduchou odpověď.
"Byl jsi vyděšený?"
powerful word in that sentence,
nejsilnější slovo ve větě,
"Ano, byl" nebo "Ne, nebyl."
"Yes, I was" or "No, I wasn't."
"Ano, velmi naštvaný."
They're the ones that know.
Oni jsou ti, co to ví.
"What was that like?"
"Jaké to bylo?"
for a moment and think about it,
a popřemýšlet o tom,
a much more interesting response.
daleko zajímavější odpověď.
will come into your mind
se vám objeví v hlavě
go out of your mind.
for several minutes
and asks a question
or it's already been answered.
nebo už byla zodpovězena.
stopped listening two minutes ago
před dvěma minutami poslouchat,
of this really clever question,
opravdu chytrá otázka,
and determined to say that.
a conversation with someone,
that we met Hugh Jackman in a coffee shop.
tehdy v kavárně potkali Hugha Jackmana.
are going to come to you.
say that you don't know.
especially on NPR,
that they're going on the record,
about what they claim to be an expert in
v čem se budou vydávat za experta
your experience with theirs.
své zkušenosti s jejich.
about having lost a family member,
you lost a family member.
jak jste vy ztratili člena rodiny.
they're having at work,
how much you hate your job.
jak vy nenávidíte svou práci.
it is not about you.
to prove how amazing you are
na dokázání toho, jak jste skvělí,
what his IQ was, and he said,
jaké má IQ, a on řekl:
about their IQs are losers."
se svým IQ, jsou ubožáci."
a promotional opportunity.
pro vyzdvihování sebe sama.
and it's really boring,
or in conversations with our kids,
nebo rozhovorech s našimi dětmi,
over and over.
to come up with in your mind.
What they care about is you.
Co je zajímá, jste vy.
but it is the most important one.
ale je to to nejdůležitější.
really important people have said
opravdu důležitých lidí prohlásilo,
the number one most important skill
ta nejdůležitější schopnost,
you're not learning."
neučíte se."
ever listened his way out of a job."
neproposlouchal k vyhazovu z práce."
I'm not interested in.
at about 225 word per minute,
rychlostí okolo 225 slov za minutu,
500 words per minute.
až 500 slovům za minutu.
those other 275 words.
těch zbylých 275 slov.
it takes effort and energy
kolik to dá energie a úsilí,
you're not in a conversation.
pak nevedete konverzaci.
barely related sentences
sotva související věty
with the intent to understand.
s úmyslem porozumět.
and it's this one: Be brief.
Buďte struční.
short enough to retain interest,
Dostatečně krátká k udržení zájmu,
k pokrytí tématu. -- Má sestra]
the subject. -- My Sister]
basic concept, and it is this one:
na ten stejný základní koncept:
with a very famous grandfather,
s velmi slavným dědou,
to talk to my grandparents,
my mother would come over to us,
za námi vždy moje máma,
He's a Russian ballet dancer."
To je ruský baletní tanečník."
amazing thing about them.
skrytou, skvělou vlastnost.
it's what makes me a better host.
ze mě dělá dobrou moderátorku.
as often as I possibly can,
be prepared to be amazed.
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Celeste Headlee - Writer and radio hostCeleste Headlee's years of interview experience give her a unique perspective on what makes for a good conversation.
Why you should listen
Celeste Headlee hosts a daily news/talk show, On Second Thought, on Georgia Public Broadcasting.
Headlee has worked in public radio since 1999, as a reporter, host and correspondent. She was the Midwest Correspondent for NPR before becoming the co-host of the PRI show "The Takeaway.” After that, she guest hosted a number of NPR shows including "Tell Me More,” "Talk of the Nation,” "Weekend All Things Considered” and "Weekend Edition". Headlee also anchored election coverage for PBS World in 2012 and was a regular guest on CNN.
Headlee holds multiple degrees in music and still performs as a professional opera singer. She appears on the album “Classically Blue” from gospel artist Lea Gilmore. She's the granddaughter of composer William Grant Still.
Celeste Headlee | Speaker | TED.com