Celeste Headlee: 10 ways to have a better conversation
Celeste Headlee: 改善傾偈嘅十個方法
Celeste Headlee's years of interview experience give her a unique perspective on what makes for a good conversation. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
unfriended someone on Facebook
about politics or religion,
know at least one person that you avoid
to talk to them?
to have a polite conversation,
亨利希金斯嘅話
of Henry Higgins in "My Fair Lady":
and anti-vaxxing, those subjects --
to devolve into an argument,
can't speak to one another
for it and against it, it's not normal.
of 10,000 American adults,
we are more polarized,
not listening to each other.
who our friends are going to be,
we're not listening to each other.
between talking and listening,
we lost that balance.
擺喺附近嘅智能電話
either have in your hands
grab them really quickly.
send more than a hundred texts a day.
are more likely to text their friends
to them face to face.
named Paul Barnwell.
a communication project.
on a specific subject without using notes.
that conversational competence
most overlooked skill we fail to teach.
獲取意念同交換想法,
with ideas and each other through screens,
communications skills.
but we have to ask ourselves:
coherent, confident conversation?"
I talk to people that I don't like.
好唔認同嘅人傾偈
deeply on a personal level.
a great conversation with them.
or so teaching you how to talk
a lot of advice on this,
to discuss in advance,
表示你係留心對話嘅
that you're paying attention,
or summarize it.
how to show you're paying attention
same skills as a professional interviewer
how to interview people,
learn how to be better conversationalists.
浪費你嘅時間同令你覺得悶
without getting bored,
without offending anybody.
We know what it's like.
walk away feeling engaged and inspired,
真係有參與到討論同獲得啓發
like you've made a real connection
做唔到上面嘅嘢
can't be like that.
我會同你哋講解下
I'm going to walk you through all of them,
one of them and master it,
平板、車匙或者手頭上嘅嘢
just set down your cell phone
or whatever is in your hand.
you had with your boss.
you're going to have for dinner.
of the conversation,
and half out of it.
or argument or pushback or growth,
why I don't allow pundits on my show:
hate Obama and food stamps and abortion.
and Dick Cheney.
assuming that you have something to learn.
a setting aside of oneself.
setting aside your personal opinion.
less and less vulnerable
to open up the inner recesses
something to learn.
knows something that you don't."
都識一啲你唔識得嘅嘢
何物、為何、如何」開始發問
what, when, where, why or how.
you're going to get a simple answer out.
你只會得到簡單嘅答案
powerful word in that sentence,
"Yes, I was" or "No, I wasn't."
-係,好嬲
They're the ones that know.
"What was that like?"
for a moment and think about it,
a much more interesting response.
will come into your mind
go out of your mind.
for several minutes
and asks a question
or it's already been answered.
stopped listening two minutes ago
of this really clever question,
and determined to say that.
a conversation with someone,
喺咖啡室撞到明星 Hugh Jackman
that we met Hugh Jackman in a coffee shop.
are going to come to you.
say that you don't know.
especially on NPR,
that they're going on the record,
稱自己做專家
about what they claim to be an expert in
your experience with theirs.
about having lost a family member,
you lost a family member.
they're having at work,
how much you hate your job.
it is not about you.
同人講自己有幾勁幾慘
to prove how amazing you are
what his IQ was, and he said,
自誇智商嘅都係傻瓜。」
about their IQs are losers."
a promotional opportunity.
and it's really boring,
or in conversations with our kids,
over and over.
to come up with in your mind.
What they care about is you.
但係係最關鍵嘅一項
but it is the most important one.
really important people have said
the number one most important skill
you're not learning."
無人會因為多聽而失業
ever listened his way out of a job."
I'm not interested in.
at about 225 word per minute,
500 words per minute.
就用剩低 275 字諗其他嘢
those other 275 words.
係要花費精神同心機
it takes effort and energy
you're not in a conversation.
barely related sentences
with the intent to understand.
and it's this one: Be brief.
short enough to retain interest,
the subject. -- My Sister]
呢句係我家姐講嘅
basic concept, and it is this one:
with a very famous grandfather,
to talk to my grandparents,
my mother would come over to us,
He's a Russian ballet dancer."
amazing thing about them.
it's what makes me a better host.
as often as I possibly can,
be prepared to be amazed.
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Celeste Headlee - Writer and radio hostCeleste Headlee's years of interview experience give her a unique perspective on what makes for a good conversation.
Why you should listen
Celeste Headlee hosts a daily news/talk show, On Second Thought, on Georgia Public Broadcasting.
Headlee has worked in public radio since 1999, as a reporter, host and correspondent. She was the Midwest Correspondent for NPR before becoming the co-host of the PRI show "The Takeaway.” After that, she guest hosted a number of NPR shows including "Tell Me More,” "Talk of the Nation,” "Weekend All Things Considered” and "Weekend Edition". Headlee also anchored election coverage for PBS World in 2012 and was a regular guest on CNN.
Headlee holds multiple degrees in music and still performs as a professional opera singer. She appears on the album “Classically Blue” from gospel artist Lea Gilmore. She's the granddaughter of composer William Grant Still.
Celeste Headlee | Speaker | TED.com