Kio Stark: Why you should talk to strangers
Kio Stark: Prečo by ste sa mali rozprávať s cudzími ľuďmi
Kio Stark explores the myriad ways encounters with strangers impact our lives. Full bio
Double-click the English transcript below to play the video.
And, in some ways, they are.
A istým spôsom to tak aj je.
sémantický význam.
or what the day is like.
alebo aký je deň.
documenting my experiences
zaznamenávať moje zážitky,
really beautiful was going on.
waiting for the light to change,
čakala som na zelenú na semaforoch,
in the street on the storm drain,
cez cestu rýchlejšie.
standing next to me.
and sort of an old-man hat,
a taký starecký klobúk.
I stepped back onto the sidewalk.
Postavila som sa späť na chodník.
so happy that he'd saved me.
šťastný, že ma zachránil.
my existence as a person
že si ma, ako človeka,
that strangers are dangerous by default,
že neznámi ľudia sú nebezpeční,
that they might hurt us.
že nám môžu ublížiť.
because we have no context.
pretože nepoznáme súvislosti.
and making choices,
vlastného názoru
I say that to her,
dvakrát popremýšľam,
but as a woman, particularly,
ako žena viem,
on the street has the best intentions.
má tie najlepšie úmysly.
and it's good to learn when not to be,
naučiť sa, kedy radšej nebyť,
we have to be afraid.
že sa máme báť.
čo naše mozgy robia.
for learning about them.
neznámych, priateľov,
about people as individuals.
nerozmýšľame ako o jednotlivcoch.
who travels frequently
ktorá často sama cestuje
as a real, individual person.
ťa uvidí ako ozajstnú, jedinečnú bytosť.
other people see you that way, too.
tak vidieť aj ostatní.
has to do with intimacy.
má dočinenia s intimitou.
a little counterintuitive,
can lead to a feeling
môžu viesť k pocitu,
"fleeting intimacy."
"letmá intimita".
that has emotional resonance and meaning.
emocionálny dozvuk a význam.
of the storm drain by the old man,
pred smrtiacou pascou - kanálom,
on my train on the way to work.
vo vlaku cestou do práce.
that people often feel more comfortable
často pohodlnejšie
about their inner selves with strangers
svojim priateľm a rodine-
and their families --
more understood by strangers.
od neznámych.
with great lament.
better than spouses!"
lepšie ako manželia!"
these interactions can be;
as much as we need our friends
ako potrebujeme
so well with strangers?
tak dobre s neznámymi?
it's a quick interaction.
you're never going to see again, right?
koho už nikdy neuvidíte, však?
it gets more interesting.
to people we're close to.
sme si blízki, máme predsudky.
that your friend or your spouse
že váš priateľ či manžel
že chcete odísť skôr.
that you want to leave early.
to start from scratch.
začať od úplného začiatku.
how we feel about them;
čo k nim cítime;
understand us a little better.
that talking to strangers matters,
rozprávať sa s neznámymi,
we tend to follow.
ktorými sa riadime.
depending on what country you're in,
záleží na krajine, v ktorej ste;
between civility and privacy.
zdvorilosťou a súkromím.
towards each other on the street.
oproti sebe po ulici.
from a distance.
they'll look away,
pozrú iným smerom,
not to interact at all.
aby sa vyhli akejkoľvek interakcii.
to talking to strangers,
voči osloveniu neznámych,
miss their stop on the bus
nevystúpia z autobusu
that they need to get around.
okolo koho musia prejsť.
shuffling of bags
that you need to get past,
že musia prejsť okolo,
culture of hospitality.
svojou pohostinnosťou.
od druhého hlt vody.
for a sip of water.
to invite you home for coffee.
k sebe domov na kávu.
most clearly when they're broken,
najlepšie, keď ich porušíme,
what the right thing to do is.
is where the action is.
aby ľudia zareagovali.
I really want you to do this. OK?
chcem, aby ste urobili toto, dobre?
or in the hallway here, smile.
tu na chodbe, usmejte sa.
that you both might see and comment on,
vidíte a môžete okomentovať,
smiešne oblečenie.
či tým začnete rozhovor.
and see if starts a conversation.
fabulous shoes right now,
as far as giving compliments goes.
sú celkom neutrálne.
o ich super topánkach.
about their awesome shoes.
the dogs and babies principle.
s princípom psov a bábätiek.
to talk to someone on the street;
they're going to respond.
to their dog or their baby.
jeho psa či bábätko.
budete rozprávať s neznámym
I talked about of feeling understood.
ten pocit pochopenia.
or, "Where does he live?"
"Čo robí tvoj otec?"
disclosure with disclosure,
až keď ten druhý niečo odhalí.
you're making beautiful interruptions
príjemne narúšate
of your daily life
you're missing out on all of that.
všetko toto vám uniká.
more time teaching ourselves?
viac času učením seba samých?
that make us so suspicious of each other.
vzájomné podozrievavé myšlienky.
ABOUT THE SPEAKER
Kio Stark - Stranger enthusiastKio Stark explores the myriad ways encounters with strangers impact our lives.
Why you should listen
Kio Stark has always talked to strangers. She started documenting her experiences when she realized that not everyone shares this predilection. She's done extensive research into the emotional and political dimensions of stranger interactions and the complex dynamics how people relate to each other in public places.
Her novel Follow Me Down began as a series of true vignettes about strangers placed in the fictional context of a woman unraveling the eerie history of a lost letter misdelivered to her door.
Stark did doctoral work at Yale University’s American Studies program, where she thought a lot about the history of science and medicine, urban studies, art, and race -- and then dropped out. Because she also taught graduate courses at NYU's Interactive Telecommunications Program, numberless people consulted her about whether or not to go back to school. Those conversations inspired Don't Go Back to School, a handbook for independent learners.
Stark is the author of the TED Book When Strangers Meet, in which she argues for the pleasures and transformative possibilities of talking to people you don’t know.
Beyond strangers, Stark's abiding fixations include the invisibility of technology; how people learn; practices of generosity and mutual aid; the culture, infrastructure and ephemera of cities; mythology and fairy tales; and advocating for independent learning, data literacy, social justice and feminism. Fiction writers get to dive down wonderful rabbit holes, and some of her favorites have been the forging and stealing of art, secret societies, the daily lives of medical examiners, the physics of elementary particles, bridge design, the history of maps, the mechanisms of wrongful conviction and psychoanalysis.
When not writing books, Stark has worked in journalism, interactive advertising, community research and game design. She writes, teaches and speaks around the world about stranger interactions, independent learning and how people relate to technology. She also consults for startups and large companies helping them think about stranger interactions among their users and audiences.
Kio Stark | Speaker | TED.com